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pock

Ever contacted an old crush?

34 posts in this topic

At the risk of being terribly cliche, I find myself thinking about a girl who I went to middle/high school with (5+ years ago) and had a crush on. We never dated and weren't even really friends, though we shared some classes and went to a dance together. It was always fun talking with her, but we were both fairly introverted and I didn't have a girlfriend until college, so I didn't really think to ask her out (except to the dance, which I'm glad I did).

Just wondering if anyone's ever contacted an old crush and how'd it go. Or if YOU were the one being contacted, what'd you think.

She lives far away, I just was thinking about her the other day when going through my old yearbooks. Now she's all I was thinking about all last night and this morning.

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I would leave it a few more weeks before I made a decision if that person and I actually dated.

But in your case, just go for it!

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Yes I have. They were nothing like I remembered them being. There is a time and place for people, and when two ways part, the bridge brings more differences than it can the once in a lifetime love. I assume you miss the feeling more so than the actual person. The personification of that feeling wont bring it again.

Usually speaking with these people seems odd, distant, and nothing like I expected it to be.

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I pretty much agree with Ambra's comments. After high school, I left my hometown for 8 years, and then moved back. One day, I casually met one of the girls I had a "thing" for back in high school. She had changed completely since then (not for the better), and the encounter ruined any previous conceptions I had about her.

People change depending on what their circumstances and experiences are, so I would advise against trying to pursue someone based on out-dated information. That's also not to say that any changes undergone by that person may have been for the better. So use your own discretion.

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Very good point.

I guess I'll just have to move on. I mean, we don't even live in the same city anymore!

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Dude, you only have one life. No regrets. Just do it, and see what happens.

What's the worst outcome? She's totally different in all the wrong ways, and sends you running in the opposite direction, leaving you wondering what the heck you were thinking.

What's the best outcome? You have a seriously romantic story to tell your grandchildren about how you and grandma started your lives together, all because you acted on a whim.

;D

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I did. It didn't go anywhere. We realized a bit of water had moved under that bridge. I think she would have but it would have involved me using her or investing in a relationship with her. I chose the curtain and exited stage left. I'm glad we talked, and glad that was all.

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Actually a very old flame who had rejected me in somewhat cold fashion at 22 facebooked me at 28. She was nothing like I remembered, and I felt and feel a very real sense of relief that she and I went nowhere.

This liberated me, and made subsequent rejections and ends of relationships very, very easy.

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Wow, this topic suits my event for today. I'm going to meet my old crush. I will share with you guys what happen.

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I have all my old crushes as friends ;). More options is always good stuff.

You never knows what the fate hold in store for us!

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Have any of you guys had an experience where you thought some girl was the most gorgeous girl in the world and several years later you're just "meh" about her? I feel like our tastes change over time or we just have a different emphasis on what we want.

On a more extreme side, there was this girl in HS whom I thought was gorgeous. I found a recent picture of her on Facebook and she ballooned up as well as got ghetto. I was like WTF? How times change...

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There is this girl, old neighbor and family friend, I had a terrible crush on in Middle School. At a school dance, it took everything I had to ask her to dance and she turned me down. While in our early twenties we went clubbing together and she asked me to slow dance with her several times, so we did. At the end of that night I thought I had an opportunity to kiss her but for what ever reason I didn't. Shortly after that I met a women that I married and never saw or communicated with my childhood friend again. From time to time, even while married I would wonder what if? What if I would of kissed her? I am now divorced in my early 40s and have very recently reconnect with my childhood friend on Face book. I asked her if she would like to go to a wedding reception with me while I visit my old home town. She declined, but I have no regrets. It was good to correspond with her and I am confident that we will meet up sometime.

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So much negativity lol

Why can't he just contact her lol?

Probably nothing will come out of it,but where is the wrong with indulging in some nostalgia?

Nothing to lose there dude

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I haven't (given that I just graduated high school) but I'd like to somewhere down the line. It'd be interesting, in the very least. There's an ESTP in high school I still think about at times (we had a mutual flirtation going on), and I quite liked him because he was interesting in his own way.

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I did but only because the old gang kept nagging me to call him, in order to piss off the ex's bitch of a wife. She intercepted the call and took a message. His bff told me later that the wife didn't give him the message and when confronted, laid down the law that he wasn't 'allowed' to call me. ;D

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hmm... from high school, nobody, but once in a while I do think about my "first love" for some unknown reason. I do not think is an interest on re-candling the relationship, but more so to see how he is doing and maybe see if he wants to do business. After all he is an accounting major and I can certainly use someone with that skill for my business. :p

Actually, I though I saw him behind my car the other day. Would I approach him, probably not, he will need to approach me first in person. However, I have no issues initiating contact online if deem necessary.

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Never went for them (2) just casually came in contact again.

Both promissed never ever doing A, B, C... "I will never"... and that's exactly where I found them.

I guess being an INTJ it has something to do with "why we never actually tried", instinct?

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I guess I'd have to agree with Changos, if I understood the post correctly. I'm personally in a mess right now, with a crush on someone who "just wants to be friends" and me not being able to move on, along with starting to think about someone I sat next to in band in school since fourth grade. Then I didn't see the one from band since 9th or 10th grade and we ran into each other at college a few times, but again, I never said anything. Now shes miles away in Boston and after exchanging a few emails, she never responded to my last one. It's always been difficult to come out and say what or how I felt to the right people when it mattered, and I don't know if being an INTJ has anything to do with it.

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hmm, i have always been into my first bf from college and had all these reunion fantasies and happily ever after scenarios in my head. i went to visit him when he was a post grad after not seeing him for years. it was wildly romantic. now we live in the same city again and when i moved out here i crashed on his floor for a few days before he kicked me out. am fairly certain his current gf thinks i'm the devil. unfortunately they live together now. i'm not sure i'll ever get over him, but i obsess less now. we talk on the other's birthdays but i haven't seen him in forever. sadly hes one of the only people i kept in touch with since college.

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Can't cross the same stream twice.

If Ghostbusters taught me anything, it's that you're not supposed to cross any streams...

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I obsess about my first girlfriend as I feel the need to explain myself and apologize for totally destroying our relationship (see breakup thread for what I did wrong). Not sure I am brave enough to try as I ripped out her heart, threw it on the ground and stomped on it. I feel the impulse to contact her and with the internet, it took about 30 seconds to find how to do it - and I now fight the urge daily.

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I obsess about my first girlfriend as I feel the need to explain myself and apologize for totally destroying our relationship (see breakup thread for what I did wrong). Not sure I am brave enough to try as I ripped out her heart, threw it on the ground and stomped on it. I feel the impulse to contact her and with the internet, it took about 30 seconds to find how to do it - and I now fight the urge daily.

Do it but be determined. Tell her you will keep casually apologising until she forgives, eventually she will, but once she does chances are you guys will just naturally go your own ways again. But at least then you will be at peace.

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I met my first big crush again on FB. Turns out we both liked each other (I told her that I had a huge crush on her). She is still pretty damn awesome. I think dating her could go well, but it is long distance and not really what I am looking for. Good friend to have though.

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