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StarFox64

Why Do Guys Tend To Be Silent In The Bedroom?

72 posts in this topic

Posted (edited)

Guys often complain about how boring a silent girl who just lays there is, and yet in my experience and of asking other females, men tend to be very silent in the bedroom, maybe only grunting a bit once they are just about there. Why is this?

Ladies (and gents!), do you enjoy hearing your man?

Edited by StarFox64

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Oh yes, I definitely like it.

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It's a bed, not an atrium. I'm not there to give speeches.

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Posted (edited)

As long as they move with their body I don't care how silent she is

But yes, people who just "lay there" are boring. 

Edited by Shepard4sheep

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Posted (edited)

Because it's natural for me not to make noise. The act of sex does not cause me to involuntary shriek out with delight, and doing so intentionally just seems fake and embarrassing. It's like when people tell you to smile for a photo. If I felt like smiling I would already be smiling. (I probably smile during sex though.)

As far as talking, I can already see and feel what's happening, I don't need a play-by-play. I would rather be able to focus on the visuals and sensations.

If someone is really into these things I will make an effort for her, it's just not my default. 

Edited by UltraIncredible

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What about when women tell you to be quiet of shutup? Sometimes there is just no pleasing them.:popcorn:

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7 hours ago, StarFox64 said:

Guys often complain about how boring a silent girl who just lays there is, and yet in my experience and of asking other females, men tend to be very silent in the bedroom, maybe only grunting a bit once they are just about there. Why is this?

Ladies (and gents!), do you enjoy hearing your man?

I think this goes from person to person and we all tend to chose partners with similar traits/behaviours and we also chose friends that tend to have similar traits/behaviours.... so nothing special about getting into that conclusions.

Anyway....

I don't like to talk, or make noises, it distracts me. I am focused 100%.

I have also talked about this with other guys and gals and they are all over the place, some do too much noise, some like to talk, some are silent, some depends, some do as they feel, etc....

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I typically laugh because I find it to be so much fun. Apparently laughing is considered to be rude, so I shut my trap most of the time and just smile and do my thing.

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12 hours ago, Holli said:

Oh yes, I definitely like it.

*smirks and nods knowingly* :cool:

12 hours ago, Arthur Dent said:

It's a bed, not an atrium. I'm not there to give speeches.

It's also not a library, and you are there to enjoy yourself :p

So to all who insist on being quiet, do you like your partner to be quiet as well?

Spoiler

That shit sounds so weird and somber now that I've asked...

 

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I don't know if there is an easy answer to your question. It's really up to the people doing it. Sometimes quiet is appropriate, like you don't want to wake other people, and other times when loud is absolutely thrilling. I guess it really depends on the situation. I don't have a preference one way or another except for them to enjoy the experience. If that makes them make noise, I'm fine with that.

On the flip side, fake noises and squeals really turn me off. I know when I'm hitting the right buttons and the sounds people make when I do. So, faking it is a total turn off.

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Umm, I like it but my partner is on the quiet side.  The other night he said something and I was totally turned on......it was new to me.  I'm not especially talkative but I will say certain things if the mood is right.  The best thing my partner ever said to me was, "I want to know how you do this.....teach me...."  Ok, so that was a total turn on because he hardly ever talks, let alone asking me to show him what I need from him.  

But, I do think it's an individual thing and depends on the couple, as well.

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Posted (edited)

I love hearing the guy during sex, and I tend to enjoy the sex more when the guy is not completely silent.

 
 
...... added to this post 12 minutes later:
 
11 hours ago, bawb said:

What about when women tell you to be quiet of shutup? Sometimes there is just no pleasing them.:popcorn:

Lol... In those cases, the guy could be saying so much cringeworthy shit that the woman might feel compelled to shush him before he winds up taking her out of the experience entirely. XD

Edited by RachelSomething

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Posted (edited)

I'm quiet most of the time so it's not like I can flip a switch. I can flip my tongue though. Who needs words when you have actions? Words are useful for directions though.

 

Personal preference: I don't care either way. It's primarily about the physical senses of touch and sight for me. Sound is secondary, although faked groans/moans and forced words are definitely cringe worthy and a bit of a turn-off.

Edited by holdyourhead

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It definitely depends on the person.
If someone is submissive and likes it rough, it's usually accompanied with a "You filthy fuckin whore" whole I choke her.

If it's just regular ol' vanilla then I don't feel the need to make any sound because it's not natural except right at the end. Especially if I've worked for it and haven't been laid for a while, I can let out a bit of a tame growl :p 

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Posted (edited)

Funny how the guys aren't admitting to holding back when they probably do.

I also LOVE hearing my guy respond to what he's feeling. It doesn't have to be words but most of the time in my experience guys tend to limit their noises to compliments here and there, a few random cuss words and really heavy breathing/maybe a groan at the end. It is a huge turn on to hear him moan and and let me hear how much he's enjoying it.

Free yourselves up, gents.

*encourages* 

Edited by SelfMadeBum

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7 hours ago, StarFox64 said:

It's also not a library, and you are there to enjoy yourself :p

So to all who insist on being quiet, do you like your partner to be quiet as well?

I enjoy myself very much at a library, thank you very much. Yes, I prefer a quiet partner. And it's not like I expect or demand a library silence. Do all the noise you feel like doing, and of course there will be all the necessary talking since proper communication it's needed. But talking for the sake of it feels fake to me, like if they learned it by watching porn.

 

49 minutes ago, SelfMadeBum said:

Funny how the guys aren't admitting to holding back when they probably do.

Free yourselves up, gents.

*encourages* 

What a nice assumption :blank:

Is it really that hard to believe that some people simply don't feel like talking or making a lot of noise?

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Posted (edited)

8 hours ago, Arthur Dent said:

Do all the noise you feel like doing, and of course there will be all the necessary talking since proper communication it's needed. But talking for the sake of it feels fake to me, like if they learned it by watching porn.

Agreed. Each should do whatever is natural. Typical "porn" noises and talk is so contrived and the opposite of sensual to me.

 

8 hours ago, Arthur Dent said:

Is it really that hard to believe that some people simply don't feel like talking or making a lot of noise?

Yeah, that was my point. It's not like I'm going to have a personality transplant the second I enter the bedroom. I'm not verbally holding back outside the bedroom. Just quiet and prefer doing or thinking over talking. Same applies within.

Edited by holdyourhead

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Posted (edited)

14 minutes ago, Arthur Dent said:

I enjoy myself very much at a library, thank you very much. Yes, I prefer a quiet partner. And it's not like I expect or demand a library silence. Do all the noise you feel like doing, and of course there will be all the necessary talking since proper communication it's needed. But talking for the sake of it feels fake to me, like if they learned it by watching porn.

 

What a nice assumption :blank:

Is it really that hard to believe that some people simply don't feel like talking or making a lot of noise?

It doesn't have to be talking (I actually prefer less or no talking) nor does it have to be a lot of noise. Nor did I mean all men hold back. I'm just sure some do.

Sometimes men have strange ideas about what's 'manly'. I'm just saying for those who hold back, don't. It's not unmanly to let your pleasure be heard, and it can be a huge turn on for your lady.

Edited by SelfMadeBum

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I'm generally pretty quiet, but it's just what comes natural for me. I'm not someone who holds back much in bed and like to lose myself in the moment. But, noise just isn't a big part of that for me. I became sexually active pretty early on, so maybe the years I spent having hushed sex to avoid the wrath of angry parents became a habit lol 

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22 hours ago, StarFox64 said:

Guys often complain about how boring a silent girl who just lays there is

Those are two completely different things -not moving and not talking. Not moving equals boring, not talking... Meh I guess it varies from guy to guy. I personally don't like a lot of talking, unless it's useful feedback. I also try to follow my own preferences.

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On 4/16/2017 at 11:24 AM, StarFox64 said:

Guys often complain about how boring a silent girl who just lays there is, and yet in my experience and of asking other females, men tend to be very silent in the bedroom, maybe only grunting a bit once they are just about there. Why is this?

Ladies (and gents!), do you enjoy hearing your man?

I think mostly it's just about the responsibilities in bed.  The guy feels like it's his responsibility to make the experience pleasurable for the woman particularly when he's on top.  If she doesn't make any noise it's hard to tell what she likes and what she doesn't.  The guy makes more noise at the end because he wants to signal to her that there almost done so she can prepare for it if she needs to or wants to.

Generally when I'm getting a BJ or when the girl is on top I make a little more noise just to let her know that I like what she's doing.

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What do you want? A recitation of Dante?

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I'm quiet because I'm concentrating.  Trust me, no one wants to hear my inner monologue at this time.

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