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Tactical Panda

Are you okay with people assuming your gender?

Are you okay with people assuming your gender?   30 members have voted

  1. 1. Are you okay with people assuming your gender?

    • Yes
      25
    • No
      0
    • Did you just assume that I can read english? RACIST ABLEIST LITERALLY HITLER SMOOTH THOUGHT CRIMINAL.
      5

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28 posts in this topic

Like it says on the tin, are you okay with people assuming your gender?

Personally I'd rather have people treat me like a guy then discuss gender. Or worse, discuss gender confusion. Or worse, discuss attention seeking mixed with angst of generally not fitting in pretending to be gender confusion. Unless there is a legit biological and natural hormone issue, in which case I'd probably advise seeing a good doc.

Come to think about it, I probably don't want to discuss anything about you, especially if it has to directly or indirectly do with how special you think you are. Which is why I tend to ask questions but seldom respond. Which brings us back to matters at hand...

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most things  we said depends on context and have subtext. For example, if someone says "I don't understand what the big deal about cat calls".  People who are not normally subjected to cat calls will respond differenly compare to People who are often subjected to said actions.

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Yes, as long as they get it correct, which isn't very hard.  It isn't a secret.  I have a male name.

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I'm unambiguously male, both in-person (bearded) and on-forum (male avatars).

 

The few times I've done drag, I'm hideously skag. Nobody will confuse me for a woman, even with some lipstick.

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In person, people never misgender me. I'm pretty obviously a woman.  However, because of my typically male first name, any type of communication where you cannot physically see me I'm nearly always addressed as a man. I once showed up to a job interview for a job requiring physical, outdoor labor and they were flabbergasted when a woman walked in the room. They ended up hiring me for a different position because of it.

I don't care either way, personally. It does sometimes bother me that my first face-to-face meetings with people I've previously emailed are super awkward/confusing, however.

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In person, only if the assumption is correct. If someone looked at me and thought I was a man, I'll confess I would be extremely offended. Online, any assumption is fine.

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 Call me a handsome woman, and I will love you forever.

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This is one of those assumptions people never got wrong unlike many other assumptions.

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No, I am a non-binary-transgender-foxkin and I demand to be treated as such!

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I am 100% okay with people assuming my gender. I personally assume peoples gender willy nilly all the time with no consequence. People just don't seem to care about gender.

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It seems kind of mean for me to get mad at assuming my gender. I'm so girly, how can they even help it?

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I find it humourous when people get it wrong online and I don't mind playing it up.

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10 hours ago, MissJ said:

Do you mean irl or on the forum?

Initially I meant IRL, but if you also want to comment on your forum/online experience then that is fine too.

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I don't care, but I wouldn't get upset and start raving about how I don't want people to discuss gender if someone asked my preferred pronoun. I'd appreciate that they are trying to be considerate toward people who do care, and that it doesn't cost me anything but 3 seconds of conversation.

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May I know why people would not be ok with others assuming their gender please?

Aside from for instance, the female who dresses like a male or vice versa unconsciously (it should rule out intention yes?), and then gets mistaken, I'm not sure why else people would not be ok... Thoughts?

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12 minutes ago, zonsop said:

May I know why people would not be ok with others assuming their gender please?

Some people identify as male or female, but other people may get it wrong more often than not when just "assuming".

Some others prefer to be addressed in a gender neutral way (with pronouns like they or hir).

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Since they started to make the right assumption, it does not bother me any longer.

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IRL sure, people pretty much always make the right assumption. Online I've been mistaken for a female once. I wasn't angry or annoyed, just very surprised. 

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I would disregard any confusion in meatspace as most probably silliness; I am obviously a man, based simply on my appearance. 

I don't care much for it online.

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17 hours ago, Paloma said:

They ended up hiring me for a different position because of it.

Ugh. This kind of shit pisses me off. Can't they even be sure of people they hire? So unprofessional.

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On ‎2017‎/‎01‎/‎30 at 6:50 AM, Tactical Panda said:

Like it says on the tin, are you okay with people assuming your gender?

Totally...

I don't have a deep voice... and when I was a teenager over the phone people were confused about it, so when they got it wrong I felt embarrased.

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7 minutes ago, Jalex said:

over the phone people were confused about it, so when they got it wrong I felt embarrased.

Doesn't that mean it would have been better if they didn't assume, but asked?

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4 minutes ago, Seablue said:

Doesn't that mean it would have been better if they didn't assume, but asked?

No. At least assuming it gave them a 50% chance of getting it right, while if they asked it was a 100% chance of being offensive.

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4 hours ago, NSchet said:

I would disregard any confusion in meatspace as most probably silliness; I am obviously a man, based simply on my appearance. 

I don't care much for it online.

Wow, I thought you were a woman :blank: 

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