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oberonblue

Swiped Right. Ugh.

First match, and I just decided that I hate this system. How am I supposed to decide if I feel like texting with someone without a tiny paragraph of self-description to disqualify them with? I suppose I'll collect a list of matches to look at photos of. I don't have time to talk to strangers without even basic self descriptions. 

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For like 99% of human history, you picked your mate/date by looking at them and picking them and then approaching them.

A tiny paragraph is a lot more to go off of than that, and you get the picture.

I am half-joking (as I too want to know more) but also telling the truth. There really is no getting around talking to strangers to see if you actually like them unless you end up dating someone you knew for awhile, like a coworker or friend.

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I'm with you. I find this online matching scene extremely exhausting! Usually we converse in message form and hit it off, then I get a completely different person upon meeting. It's time consuming and defeats the purpose.

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I have the same problem. I swipe right on someone because they're not awful, match with them... and then what? It's hard to come up with anything to say to a perfect stranger whose only known virtue is being "not awful" and who provides little, if any, interesting personal info in their profile.

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I agree about the awkward, tiresome online dating or any other kind of "getting to know strangers" by having a blurb and photo: both chosen/frozen.

In person, we can observe how the other responds to something unexpected such as a meal being delivered late or missing what was ordered, or to a sudden thunderstorm, or any number of real-life, here/now experiences that would draw out a spontaneous reaction or response; it is the same with the other observing us.

There is a "feeling along", a kind of groping in the dark that gets aided by a particular kind of light in person, which is missing online. 

There's that, and then the artificial matching of likely candidates, dating someone based on descriptions and such? Heck, Gromit and I would have passed each other by, and damn fast, too. What a pity that would have been.

I'm glad we met as we did: A co-worker of his kept pressuring him to come meet me (I knew nothing about it until after we met) because he thought I was Gromit's type. Gromit resisted until rundown he decided to shut the man up, came, saw, talked, asked me out, and here we are 28 years later:

Happy with each other, truly best friends and some kind of intimate I can't precisely name; perhaps something close to the earliest meaning of agape...

Edited by ness2361
Typo correction.

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Yes oberon, your dating life must be super hard with your perfect face :angry:

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1 minute ago, Arthur Dent said:

Yes oberon, your dating life must be super hard with your perfect face :angry:

Having a perfect face does not make dating any easier, believe you me :awesome: 

If anything you just get to spend more time fending off gross shallow people who only like you for your perfect face :thumbsdown:

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33 minutes ago, Benner said:

Having a perfect face does not make dating any easier, believe you me :awesome: 

If anything you just get to spend more time fending off gross shallow people who only like you for your perfect face :thumbsdown:

I used to be considered anywhere from very pretty to stunning and striking, and it's true, to the extent others agreed with these adjectives, I was dogged by some real humdingers, i.e. :thumbsdown:

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