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NSchet

Parent's MBTI

32 posts in this topic

I've noticed a certain recurring pattern where many INTJs tend to have an xSFJ parent, usually an ISFJ mother. I might have made this up because of my pre-existing bias, or maybe this is caused because of the enormous amount of xSFJs in the world (the ISFJ being the most popular type making up 13.8% of the global population and the ESFJ coming in second at 12.3%).

So could it be possible that one's personality type is in any way affected/dictated by their parents'?

Thoughts?

And if you do have an ISFJ mother, what was your childhood like when it came to your relationship with her?

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ISFJ mom, ENFJ dad

Relation with my mom has always been good although I naturally do click better with my dad. For most ISFJ females raising children is probably the calling in life, hence they make good moms.

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ISFJ mom, ENFJ dad

Exactly the same with me.

For most ISFJ females raising children is probably the calling in life, hence they make good moms.

I would agree with that statement in a more broad sense, but I wouldn't say that it does apply as well with children that are specifically INTJ. At least in my own subjective experience.

Would you say that your parent's personality affected your own while growing up, or were you always an INTJ?

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Exactly the same with me.

I would agree with that statement in a more broad sense, but I wouldn't say that it does apply as well with children that are specifically INTJ. At least in my own subjective experience.

Would you say that your parent's personality affected your own while growing up, or were you always an INTJ?

Agreed, the statement was intended to refer to the broad sense

I'm pretty sure I've always been INTJ. The personalities of my parents and siblings (I'm the eldest followed by an ESTP brother, IxFJ sister, ENFJ brother) did however help to grow up less socially awkward than I would have on my own.

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My mom is ISFJ, dad is ENTP.

My siblings (well, the ones she bore and raised) are both INTJs. I test as INTJ most of the time.

My relationship with my mother was terrible growing up. It caused a lot of issues with me that I have mostly overcome in my adult life.

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I asked my parents to take the test today.

Dad: ESFJ

Mom: ESTJ

The conversation with my mother went surprisenly well as she explained why being a mother at home made her seem more introverted to me. But i told my dad why i asked him to take it saying i used it to better understand myself in the past year and he says "its just a personality test." which is irritating..

Edited by Morzone

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I asked my parents to take the test today.

Dad: ESFJ

Mom: ESTJ

The conversation with my mother went surprisenly well as she explained why being a mother at home made her seem more introverted to me. But i told my dad why i asked him to take it saying i used it to better understand myself in the past year and he says "its just a personality test." which is irritating..

Hahaha I've probably would have said the same thing. To which I know I would say the same thing.

My dad was definitely an ISTJ(just the facts please) and now when I mentioned it I think my mom is an ENFJ. She does like her alone time but she is a pathological liar. My mom and dads divorce; holy shit! It was so stupidly melodramatic. Like I said I mention she was a introvert before but I don't think she was an introvert come to think about it. My parents were homebodies. I didn't care for it at all. And some of it did rub off me. So, of course I think that your parents definitely do have an involvement in the making of a childs personality.

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Hahaha I've probably would have said the same thing. To which I know I would say the same thing.

My dad was definitely an ISTJ(just the facts please) and now when I mentioned it I think my mom is an ENFJ. She does like her alone time but she is a pathological liar. My mom and dads divorce; holy shit! It was so stupidly melodramatic. Like I said I mention she was a introvert before but I don't think she was an introvert come to think about it. My parents were homebodies. I didn't care for it at all. And some of it did rub off me. So, of course I think that your parents definitely do have an involvement in the making of a childs personality.

Sigh lol. We really dont get along.

My mom knew i liked my alone time and as long as we didnt get into trouble she didnt seem to care. I agree parents do have some influence, or so i think.

But they're both extroverts eww :/

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ENTP mom,

INFJ dad,

ENTJ stepdad that I lived with was raised by with my mom.

ISTJ stepmom. Evil.

ISTJ second stepdad. Didn't like me.

Fyi they each repeatedly over time have taken the test.

Edited by Beesnthebreeze

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Mom is an INFP, Dad is ISxJ.

Siblings are INFJ and probably ESTP, but I'm only certain about the extroverted and thinking functions. The ExTx sibling has an untreated mental illness, so he's very hard to type. He's incredibly smart and outgoing, but doesn't think things through, and pulls from an insanely broad pool of knowledge. He also does a shit-ton of drugs, is physically aggressive, has a felony, and is somewhat of a failure despite his impressive intellect.

My relationship with my parents was pretty good growing up. They were strict and open in all the right ways. Gave me structure while allowing me to explore myself and the world. The one big road block was my desire to get out in public and their desire to never leave the house. They are both very introverted, so getting them to take me out to see friends was like pulling teeth.

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The conversation with my mother went surprisenly well as she explained why being a mother at home made her seem more introverted to me. But i told my dad why i asked him to take it saying i used it to better understand myself in the past year and he says "its just a personality test." which is irritating..

My parents couldn't care less about MBTI. They think it's silly nonsense, comparing it to astrology.

But they're both extroverts eww

Except for my mother and I, all of my relevant family is pretty extroverted which really fucking sucks. Family gatherings are such a pain in the ass.

The one big road block was my desire to get out in public and their desire to never leave the house. They are both very introverted, so getting them to take me out to see friends was like pulling teeth.

My father was, and still is to this day and extreme extrovert. My mother was much more introverted, but not nearly as much as I am. They were pretty controlling and over protective when it came to literally everything I did that they couldn't directly control anyways (definitely helped in making me even more socially awkward as a teenager). It wasn't anything too crazy though, and their "over-protectiveness" subsided as a grew older.

Edited by NSchet

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I've never gotten her to take the test, but I'm pretty sure my mum would test as an INFP -- though the interesting thing here is that it's possible that she could actually be an INFJ. The only thing that stops me from confidently labeling her an INFJ is the fact that, to me at least, she comes across as being a strong perceiver, consistently disorganized and very lenient about things that Js are typically not lenient towards... Otherwise, what I see as being her cognitive functions allign with those of an INFJ. As for my dad, I've no idea. Never met him, lol. (oo srs angst right there)

Not entirely relevant to the thread, but my sister is an ISFJ, my older brother is an ESTJ, and my younger brother is an ISTJ.

Edited by ShatteredGlass

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Mam, crazy hyper esfp. Dad (not seen in 17 years) istj.

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Mom: enfj

Dad: infp

My mom and I have a very twisted relationship. We can get along beautifully, and have great conversations that stem from a connection I have not found with many people. This does not compensate for our countless issues. More times than I am proud of, I have opened up my heart and soul to her (extremely rare for me) and she would respond with what appeared to be deep understanding. Later, I would always find that somehow she would betray me with my own confessions, using them against me, or telling other people about them. Or I would find that the things I told her didn't mean as much to her as she let on. She will say or do anything just to feel close to someone, and that means stepping over the people who give her the trust they mistakenly believe she will treasure. Other problems we have include: my bluntness, her manipulative and self-victimizing behaviors, my need to do things my way with her attempt to control me, my need for bountiful alone time, etc. But there are great things too, like how great she is at helping me with social or other issues, and how loving she can be. Our differences and constant struggle for control makes our relationship often toxic though.

My dad is a much different story. He is the most genuinely kind and caring man I know, and is WAY more laid back than my mom (although he often goes off on rage filled fi rants.) We have never really opened up to each other and I'm not really sure why, maybe it's because I didn't see him much growing up (my parents are divorced), or maybe neither of us opened up our worlds without a little prying. I've tried opening up before and he has never reciprocated in any way, so I guess I just stopped trying. He really has such a calming presence though.

I am extremely lucky for both my parents, but I wish my mom and I were less at each other's throats, and my dad and I could share a bit more.

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ISTJ dad (S strength of 1)

INFP mom

Is personality type hereditary at all? It doesn't seem to be. My 3 siblings are all extraverts.

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ISFJ mother, ISTP/INTJ father (still can't quite pin him down).

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Those are two quite different types.
I know the functions are different (though both share Ni+Se) but they don't outwardly present that differently. Consider the number of former INTJs on this site who later realised they were ISTP. Edited by SelfMadeBum

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Is this party for INTJs only? :curtain: My mom is an ISTJ, stepdad is ISFJ, and my brother is an ENFJ. So that was quite the household growing up.

If it is though, I had an INTJ relationship once, and got to meet his parents. Well, his dad, who was an ISTJ. His mom was ISFJ from what I could tell from the stories, as his parents divorced early on. Apparently she was batshit, and so was her mother too. She was either bipolar or borderline, and there was a lot of emotional and even some physical abuse. :(

Edited by Snowy

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Posted (edited)

I have: an almost stereotypical ISFJ mom, an extremely extraverted and easily irritable ESFP dad, a quiet and rational ISTJ brother while my other brother is a very blunt and honest ISTP.

As regards to your question about the relationships with ISFJ mums: I have a very good relationship with my mother. I remember that she was the only person that used to understand my personality and my strange complaints due to my neurodiverse condition, as opposed to my father.

 

Edited by Neus

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They're very sharp sensors (ISTJ/ISFJ), full of repressed wit, but they didn't receive education, which severely dumbed down their verbal capacity — something that I youthfully exploited. I'm their revenge rather than a type. Forget it, I'm the INTJ prince.

Notably many INTJs seem inclined that their parents are a timeless example of sensors, but consider the possibility that a parent infuses their intuitive potential in you, instead of wasting it in a culturally or economically fruitless time, also a digitally fruitless time where people must take what they get, instead of using search engines to wallow in information of choice. Sensing can be a forsaking mentality, but also a hibernation where a person retaliates for the shortcomings of upbringing, by investing in a new body. This is the obvious logic for giving birth anyway, reclaiming your fate by cancelling yourself.

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They both be sensing types: ESFP/XSTJ.  i do not think any environment could shape me into becoming an ENTP here. I was what I am now, at 5. If anything, I think my environment inclined me into becoming more grounded, closer to mimicking S due to constant reminders about the "here and now." But no way of really knowing without a control. 

I'd hazard guess that N kids who had S parents might be more (g)rounded out than the other way around with having the same types. But the flip-side side is that it might be lonely standing there - you all alone.... emotional gain on one hand with the same types across the board,  but at the expense of another.

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ISTJ (I think) dad and ISFJ mom and ESTJ sister. Well... I feel like I've always been the black sheep who kept screwing up and prefered doing random playing and dreaming in a household with the work-hard-mentality. 

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Mom: INFP. 

Dad: ESTP. 

My mom is a loving and accepting person, and her family is her number one concern. Introverted homebody. Provided a nurturing environment for each of us. However, because of her bad temper and tendency to hold grudges, we have often been at odds with one another.

My dad is the opposite. Extroverted, extremely popular, outgoing, brave, charming, etc. We are not super close, but I enjoy spending time with him. His tendency to gossip can be annoying though.

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