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About ElstonGunn

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    Core Member


  • MBTI
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    Respectful Inventor


  • Location
    New York (the state... nowhere near the city with the same name.)
  • Gender
  1. If you go all the way through a novel, it's kind of like a vicarious version of life experience. And there's the old saw about experience being the best teacher. I think that's the point behind those studies showing that reading novels raises empathy. It's one thing to get an overall plot summary so that you understand the gist of a book on a factual level, but in psychological terms, I would imagine it's another thing entirely to go through the whole thing in an as-it-happens kind of way. Stories affect people more than facts do. I mean, that's the difference between reading about World War I in a history book and reading Johnny Got His Gun or the last paragraph of All Quiet on the Western Front.
  2. Bienvenidos, amiga fellow INTJ. There's nothing like a nice quiet Sunday to yourself. I can go a whole day without seeing or talking to another person on the weekends, and it's great.
  3. I like that it's called "The Sausage Index." That's very appropriate.
  4. It looks like my beloved Bills are going for a 17-year playoff drought. It's gonna be a long year.
  5. I think that's the crux of it.

  6. I've had little success with the ones I've tried. I still maintain a profile on Okcupid, but I only check it about once a month, or when I want to get depressed. In five or ten years of on-and-off usage, I've gotten two face-to-face meetings out of it. I haven't been able to figure out if I'm doing something wrong, or if I'm just unappealing, but either way, I don't expect anything out of it now. For me, the only thing worse than online dating is trying to get dates offline. I never had any success with that. I mean that in the most literal sense possible.
  7. I don't have any. Cheap state schools and living with my parents got me through undergrad. Then that approach, plus working for the university and getting free tuition as a result allowed me to do grad school without any loans.
  8. I've never dated (or pseudo-dated) one of them, but I imagine I'd be susceptible to it if one crossed my path and developed the kind of sympathetic-but-irritating fascination with me, like they do with the uptight guy in the movies about them.
  9. I'm not a big fan of "It is what it is." I'd prefer it if people just said what they mean by it-- "This sucks, but I don't have the time, resources, or inclination to make it any better"--rather than presenting it with an air of inevitability.
  10. I couldn't tell you the last time I wore tan pants to work. It's too bright of a color for me. For some reason, I believe that my pants have to be a darker color than my shirt. It looks off balance to me otherwise. I think I read somewhere that chinos have a slight taper to the leg, in order to save fabric or something like that.
  11. I may have cracked a rib laughing at this. I'll be sending you a medical bill.

  12. No, it's a perfectly reasonable relationship. You're only one year apart. Granted, small age differences are magnified at the younger end of the spectrum, but you're one year apart. Plus, it sounds like the relationship started before you left for college, and you're not going to be far away. There's nothing at all weird about what you have. You've got the least-weird kind of relationship problem that there is for someone who's in his teens. Don't worry about it, and go enjoy it instead.
  13. I'd go with pants, myself-- black slacks, brown corduroys, or maybe some dungarees if I wanted to be casual. But that's mostly because I don't even own a pair of short-pants. ...You probably shouldn't take any advice about attire from me, come to think of it. Not unless you want to give off an old-man kinda vibe. So, yeah, wear the short-pants the next time you have an outside date in the summertime.
  14. I didn't read it as being obvious. I'm not sure what action is meant by "began to seduce him." I took that as referring to something that's still relatively indirect, like flirtation or hinting, or anything where there's still a significant amount of room for escalation. But if it meant something more to the effect of her taking her clothes off and hopping onto his lap to straddle him, then that's entirely different than what I thought it meant.
  15. I don't understand. The premise was that this is a committed relationship. That seems like a capricious reason to end it. The only interpretations of it that I can think of are that you'd either consider it such a big turn-off that you'd end the relationship if someone weren't as perceptive about these things are you are, yourself. Or else, it's just the questioning of your view on the situation that would bother you. Neither one of those sound to me like particularly well-adjusted responses, so I must be missing the real reason. Or maybe I'm imagining a different, subtler kind of behavior on the part of the other woman than you are.