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Antares

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Everything posted by Antares

  1. I don't know. But for reference, this happened at least once in history. In the 19th century Britain and later the rest of the European powers decided that slavery was always wrong. They exercised their imperialistic muscles vigorously to stamp it out wherever they saw it, in their colonies or not. Including blockading ports with their big ass navy and destroying local economy until the locals agreed to give up the slave market. Many people (most of the world actually, because everyone had slaves back then and saw nothing wrong with that) hated them. They thought the imperialist west was trying to destroy their economy and way of life. Which, well, they were. so I guess that's one way to do it. Deny them trade until they give in. Deny them foreign aid until they give in. If you're going to offer circumcision we will refuse to fund any hospitals at all.
  2. I quit social media a while back and got back into it because a couple of my friends convinced me that it's how nearly all Millennials and Gen Z'ers communicate and I'd lose touch with most people if I do. And I've observed that it's largely true. But every now and then my fingers are still twitching to get rid of Facebook, in large part because they not only have more tabs on you than the NSA most probably (you don't even have to be on FB for that to happen. If you're in any photo on FB at all, even if it's in some random stranger's selfie at the bus stop, FB has a profile on you and can probably track you all over the globe) and I don't feel good supporting this organization. Their facial and speech pattern recognition abilities are creepy as fuck. They were on Hacker News some time ago because they're trying to develop mind reading technology so you can communicate with your friends via telepathy, or something. I think it should die and I'm abetting it by maintaining a profile on it. What happened when you quit Facebook? Did you lose touch with a lot of people? I'm thinking of giving the few I care about my email address, but I'm afraid they won't bother to use it because 99% of their social circle is on Facebook and that's simply the only way they want to socialize with people. Maybe I should just say screw these people and if they don't want to keep in touch then fuck them. I don't know.
  3. Can confirm. I spend hours of my life looking at cat videos
  4. Introvert. I'd go crazy with an extrovert. I barely want to leave the house
  5. Depends on why you don't like WhatsApp I guess. I think WhatsApp tracks you everywhere. Unfortunately that can't be avoided with a second phone. I would suggest either Signal or Wire (both open source end to end encrypted apps) but most people aren't on there. Literally only tech savvy privacy oriented people are there. The only upside of WhatsApp is that it encrypts your data. The downside is that FB gets your metadata. Which is arguably more important than your messages. Also, mbasic.facebook.com recently got rid of its messaging capabilities to try to force Messenger download. Fuck Facebook. I literally don't know if I can bear giving up some of my friendships.
  6. Are we still sexual reproducers if biological differences just didn't exist? Or are we some species of amoeba? Who births the children? I'm not being facetious. This matters.
  7. I've liked a couple of "nice guys" without the affection being reciprocated. But I'm definitely not trying to date up. These guys have no girls after them at all but me and they almost never get into relationships. They just don't like me. They like more masculine women it seems. I have a couple of guys after me at any one point. I think it's easier to attract someone you don't like because it's easier to act confident around them. That's attractive.
  8. Possibly because you're older. You're seen as some species of lizard if you're younger than 30 and doesn't have a social media account. It just so happens that people in mathematics are more likely to be eccentric that way, so I met a young mathematician once. Asked for his contact info. He said he didn't have social media. I basically teased him for it and then thought: wait, he's everything I want to be. Why is it even strange that he doesn't have Facebook? Why is it even a funny to me? It's crazy how entrenched it is. It's a part of the natural order of things for us.
  9. I think it's because while they use Messenger 90% of the time they still want to be able to post to their entire circle from time to time, so they would rather not split the functionalities. That's not what I like doing but I can see why one would. Getting "likes" is addictive. Even I feel a little bit excited when 35 people like my profile picture and stuff. The Chinese app WeChat takes care of that. It allows you to both post and instant message. It's creepy in a special Chinese way though. ...... added to this post 3 minutes later: Yeah. Meatspace is how I like to connect. My best friend complains that I reply really slowly to texts and stuff. I just don't find it meaningful or worth my time. If I want to shoot the shit with you let's do it over dinner or coffee or video chat. I also like forums like this because there's enough space to say meaningful things.
  10. Not my personal experience but my cousin has. He was dating a total gold digger for a while. The girl was emotionally abusive and was only nice when she wanted to use his credit card. Whatever she wanted he just gave it to her. Why? Because she was super hot apparently. He was making close to minimum wage and she was bleeding him dry. When he came to me about his troubles I asked him if she really was a good person and worthy of love, if she's willing to bleed him dry knowing he doesn't have that much to begin with and might lose his flat. She doesn't even have basic human decency yet he was wrapped around her little finger. Everyone who cared about him warned him against her and he admitted they were right, but he couldn't leave her. ...... added to this post 3 minutes later: So guys like assholes over Nice Girls too?
  11. I like the rest of your argument but... I haven't actually met that many virgins in this site. This tag line is probably a tongue in cheek joke. There is no higher reason for it.
  12. I compare it to jumping off a skyscraper. Super fun for the first few seconds. Then you realize how fucked your are. ...... added to this post 24 minutes later: I think it's male aggression, really. The aggression does not have to be a negative thing. He could be ambitious. Go getter. Proactive. Driven. Assertive. Willing to stand up for himself. Willing to protect himself and those he loves against aggressors. But aggression can also manifest in violence and emotional unpredictability, and a general "I don't give a fuck"ness. I haven't met many girls who are attracted to men with no passions and no goals in life and makes her take the lead in every aspect of the relationship, who will fold and capitulate at the first sign of conflict, i.e. No aggression at all. In sixth grade, I distinctly remember telling myself I would NEVER go for a guy like my dad. People were bullying me at school. Instead of standing up for me, he told me not to stand up for myself either and keep my head low. I obviously didn't do that. And once, a good friend's dad went to the teacher who was being a shithead to his daughter and took him to the principal's office. I was super jealous. On an instinctive level I don't make such a distinction between good aggression and bad aggression. That kind of distinction exists in my higher brain. And we know that immature boys or girls, don't use their brains too much. I've always been an overly cerebral type. The bad aggression boys I see as brutish and barbaric, so I have a some amount of disdain for that kind of presentation. If I'm super drunk these guys might be really sexy. If I have any amount of sobriety (and I always do. I'm nearly tee total), I have better things to do. I can still find the bodybuilding brawler sexy, but I'm not going to be drawn to him.
  13. Real question. Medical immortality is beloved by some to be merely decades away. So if you're not going to be dead by then, and have the resources, you can live forever. Is that still "healthcare"? Should everyone be entitled to it? Should you undergo mandatory sterilization if you become immortal to prevent you from potentially bearing unlimited children, all of whom could also be immortal?
  14. My best friend has recently been online dating and he has little to no experience in dating. He had a relationship, but she asked him out and they were friends before. And that was in high school. His ex girlfriend (now good friends), according to him, wrote several messages to girls on his behalf and he's been getting replies but he asked me how he should ask them out. To be honest, I'm not the best person to explain this to him either. I also have Aspergers and I have a very hard time talking about social relationships as if it's not some kind of academic subject. I can explain things such that he understands, yes, but I can't translate that to practical tips because fundamentally I don't understand social nuances either. But he doesn't seem to understand explanations that doesn't amount to a very academic treatment of the subject. If I say: "Ask her out as soon as you two have a good conversation going" he said: "How"? Well, without knowing the exact flow of the conversation I can't exactly say. So I start treating the subject in an abstract way like "Then you should just search for mutual interests in the conversation and suggest something that has to do with it. If it fails just suggest a restaurant for dinner." Then I'd get something like "How do you 'search for mutual interests'"? I guess I could just talk to the girl and ask her out for him or his ex can do it but neither of us can go on dates for him. If we tell him what to say it's a form of doing the heavy lifting for him, and it's honestly counterproductive for anyone to do it but him. How do I help him? Are there good books that doesn't involve PUA (he's not interested in that, and I'm not speaking for him. We talked about PUA in passing before. He has zero interest in that and expressed a negative opinion of people who use it) that you can recommend?
  15. If Neil Strauss is to be believed close to 100% of women he's ever tried it on responded positively. PUA wouldn't be this massive industry if its customers can't use these tricks to get women to sleep with them.
  16. It's often the other way around. Sometimes the less smart person doesn't even understand precise LANGUAGE. Like "it's not accurate to say 'all swans are white', because there are many black birds that fit operational definition of swans. Black swans are not as often seen in popular culture but that doesn't imply 'all swans are white' is a true statement." You can rephrase it anyway you like but below a certain threshold of intelligence someone will not even understand that "all swans are white" is an empirical binary proposition. They can't tell the difference between ALL swans are white and ALL swans I've ever seen are white. The conversation goes something like this: "white swans are not as pretty as black swans in my opinion." "What? swans are white." "There are definitely black swans." "Well, look at this swan. It's white. And that swan. It's white. swans are obviously white." "Yeah but all that means is, there are no black swans you can see here. And maybe you've never seen a black swan. But they definitely exist." "Look you're just not understanding what I'm saying. LOOK AT SWANS. They are white. Obviously swans are white. How am I going to explain this to you?" "Ok sure. You're right. Swans are white. Let's just go back to looking at them and forget I said anything." I'm sure for the other person the conversation was a frustrating experience too. Basically if you're different enough the smart person might want to have conversations about topics that a less intelligent person cannot even talk about in any cogent manner so there are whole sections of your personality that you have to shut down around your partner if you don't want to get into arguments like that. I learned that if I ever get into conversations like that I just skip the argumentation and go straight to "no, you're right. I goofed. Swans are white." I mean theoretically I could be patient and come up with novel ways to handhold somebody through that thought process. But if I have to alter my speech and thought patterns that much so my partner can understand me, the relationship just wouldn't be enjoyable. I imagine if I marry this person, I wouldn't want to explain "cars, unlike most real estate, are liabilities, not assets if you took out a loan for them so no honey, we're not making a savvy financial decision by taking out a 50k loan for your dream Tesla." I have not observed that unintelligent people are significantly kinder or better partners in other ways than intelligent people so all else being equal I choose intelligence every time.
  17. I don't think you can definitively prove that being a man or woman is preferable. Each individual values each items on the list differently so the sum total cannot be the same. If I don't want children then if I'm a man I'm not going to envy women for being able to give birth so it would weigh zero in considering whether I consider being a woman preferable. If I don't want to help others and I don't have to do strength related tasks much then I might even consider my strength, which most people would call a male advantage, an annoyance since it leads to being asked by society, a lot more, to help others in such tasks just because I'm male. My best friend is 6'2" and actively wishes he were shorter. If he were a girl he'd be around his mom's height, which is 5'10". He sees that as an ideal height. Also each cis person is probably used to being who he/she is. For me, imagining the change to male and the subsequent adjustments I'd have to make to all my habits is just daunting. I'd say no just based on that. Likewise, with a combination of my genetics, personality and habits, it renders a lot of the advantages of being male void and the disadvantages of being female void. Because of my experience of being female, I've also learned to deal with the disadvantages that used to be there. I've often very good at managing my dysmenorrhea to the extent that I no longer think about it. If I transition to male, I would have to relearn things to offset male disadvantages. I don't want to. Even if I accept that other girls have to watch their drinks closely so they won't have to worry about date rape drugs, I don't go to clubs/bars/parties so it's not a concern I have. If I were male, I'd be a VERY short (think 5'3") autistic male, instead of a petite autistic attractive female, because the height would render me very unattractive to a significant portion of the female population. Autism would hinder my ability to ask girls out or understand human interactions. I wouldn't even gain that much strength relative to the male population. The men in my family are pretty weak for men and it's delusional to think I'd be different. Everybody in my family is genetically slender and athletic (GREAT if you're a girl), but mostly in cardio sports. We definitely should NOT get into any fights (we also have weak bones) and my dad was bullied physically in school by other males with no way to fight back, whereas being female the bullies tend not to be physical anyway. ...... added to this post 18 minutes later: Yeah. Males seem not to know how to deal with drama and they don't know how to deal with women's drama. So they have a hard time, say, listening to their SOs vent about workplace or friend group drama. but the downside of being a female is that, whether the cause is social or genetic, females cause and are involved in a lot more friend group and workplace drama in my experience, so being a female it's hard to avoid getting suckered into it. In fact in high school my INTP best friend at the time had the ENTIRE friend group turn on her, because she saw that two girls were feuding over stupid shit, then the friend group was divided into factions and she was pressured to choose a side. She said, I think this conflict is pointless and nobody has the moral high ground here so no, I'm staying out of this. The resulting fallout was hideous. She became pariah to both sides. And somehow the factions never made me choose because they each assumed I was on their side. When they vented I just listened sympathetically wondering what the hell they're all on about. I thought they were stupid complaints but kept them to myself and chalked it up to routine complaints. Autistic little me didn't even see the larger war, and one day I went to school it was all over and the entire group united against the INTP. That's when I realized the scope and intensity of the war. I was acutely aware that I should ostracize the INTP. I didn't understand why but nobody was making eye contact with her and glaring/giggling when her back was turned. I went along with it for a couple of hours then I turned against my friend group. There's nothing she could have done in my eyes to justify these dipshits treating her like that. So I reconciled with her and we both more or less fell out of that group, becoming best friends and life just... improved.
  18. PUAs don't often ask for forgiveness. I even believe it's actively discouraged.
  19. My personality would suit a male better, but I'm also unusually immune to social pressure. Expectations to be feminine just come in one ear and out another. It's not something I stress about. I'm also introverted, don't like going to bars or going out, so my risk of suffering sexual violence or robberies, assault etc are drastically lowered, so that specific female disadvantage also does not apply. I have many of the traditionally male strengths. I'm competitive and I'm a tough negotiator. I have high spatial/logical/mathematical intelligence and that alone makes me prized in STEM fields. Women get affirmative action. I don't let other people's tones and attitudes bother me. Coupled with traditional young attractive female advantages, I have the best of both worlds so it would be foolish to give up the female side. especially seeing my dad is 5'3" and my mom is 5'2" and nobody in his family is taller than him. So highly unlikely i would be taller than him. Long story short I would NOT want to be a 5'3" guy. He's also not a very attractive guy and I could take after him. Couple that with my Aspergers I'd probably have to go MGTOW because I have some level of social anxiety and I might just say screw dating, I don't care. But as a girl I just get asked out. I barely put any effort into dating. The other demographic makes such vigorous efforts, I don't have to. And talking to my male friends they get rejected A LOT. I'm even confident enough to ask some guys out, because I dont think I'd be rejected, being aware of this dynamic. Also, in American society I'd be an Asian male with Aspergers. A very short one. Last I heard they're not overly popular as a demographic. Also I can wear fedoras unironically. I literally own one. They're cool as fuck.
  20. I can believe that to be true for the normal ranges. So 100 vs 115, 130 vs 145, 85 vs 100 etc. but once you get high, like 145-160 and such it starts to make less of a difference in my observation. my friends are definitely all highly intelligent people, and it's not that I never come into contact with other people, but after a certain cutoff, it no longer makes a difference how much smarter someone is. My BF has a confirmed IQ of 167 and I have no evidence mine is above 150 yet the difference is not noticed. He even thinks I might be smarter than him just judging by conversations. If you have an IQ of 200 and your friend has an IQ of 185, quantum physics is just not something you talk about a lot, even between people of extremely high intelligence. Among mathematicians and physicists, even if we DO talk about these things, usually it's not in a way where IQ matters. We're usually talking about research results "turns out all solvable groups are pretty much categorized" rather than "here's a problem lets look at it together" and proceed to find out you're 15 times faster than I am. I know a kid who's a veritable prodigy. His IQ was easily above 185. He's THAT much faster than I am in math. But we have no problems talking. Normal philosophical topics and abstract conversations don't require much beyond, say, IQ 130 I would say. But whether someone is above or below 130 is pretty noticeable to me, namely in the capacity for abstract reasoning. Admittedly I don't enjoy talking to people who aren't good at that. If I had my way my conversations would be 90% abstract.
  21. I don't think I can tolerate someone much less intelligent than me. Even a little less intelligent has been an issue in the past. Don't know my IQ exactly but my SAT scores and the fact that I'm doing quite, but not extremely well in a selective STEM program indicates it's something above but not too far above 145 (basically, I maxed out the SAT test's limits. Normal tests can't test for very high intelligence and 145 is about the highest score anyone can get on those). With one of my exes, I was constantly frustrated with our conversations. He just doesn't get abstraction at all and only wanted to talk about philosophical subjects that were at least a little emotional. He self identifies as INFP. I can do emotional talk but I mostly prefer topics about emotionally neutral subjects. He only wanted to talk about subjects like movies and love and society and stuff. Didn't like or really understand anything unrelated to human emotions. From his SAT scores I would estimate his IQ to be 120-125, so by societal standards he is considered pretty smart. my current boyfriends IQ is 167 (officially tested) so mine is quite a bit lower than his though he doesn't seem to notice. And his speech doesn't go over my head so I'd say we're good. I like to speak very abstractly and precisely. And I tend to split hairs, being a mathematician. Anyone who doesn't understand that, or thinks of it as arrogant or pedantic, wouldn't be a good match. And in my experience the more intelligent someone is the less thy find that to be an issue.
  22. It may sound arrogant for me to say so, but I don't know what I should strive towards and reading fitness forums they always tell you to have a clearly defined measurable goal. I don't want to lose weight. I don't want to gain weight. I'm in general just lazy and not an active person and through some divine providence I still am/look pretty fit considering I'm one step above a couch potato; after a long spell of not doing any physical activity I did a fitness test and the trainer said my fitness level is about that of an 18 year old. The most exercise I do is yoga and body weight for less than 30 minutes at a time and some walking to and from school, and this only like 2-4 times per week if its a good week. Some consecutive weeks I do nothing. I do know that however coasting on my "gift" is not a sustainable plan since everyone gets older and my bad habits (my eating habits sometimes degenerate into ramen and potato chips for days on end) will catch up to me in time, but I have a hard time getting motivated. I don't have a goal so I'm not working towards anything. "More fit" is vague and doesn't really help me. I looked online for some fitness websites to see what I should do, but fitness articles usually focus on losing a lot of weight, or becoming the hulk. If I lose a lot of weight I'm dead. I don't want to be the hulk. Except maybe being "better" than my mostly sedentary self. No, I don't want to look better. I have no issues with how I look. But I know my lifestyle isn't too healthy or very fit so I guess I want that. I want to have more energy and to know that I'm doing my physical body a service. And stuff. I don't know. If you're like me, what do you strive towards?
  23. I'm attracted to male characteristics. If they were to suddenly disappear I would either have to find every gender attractive, or no gender attractive. But I would only seriously date biological males. How would the person he's hitting on know he's a straight guy? He could be a girl. I don't think punching a person who hits on you would be a winning strategy. You could be punching a girl.
  24. Not in general, no. There are one or two perks I'd like to have. But wouldn't trade the whole package for anything.
  25. The answer to that question is always yes. Unless she's your sister, your boss or your student.