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About volleyballjerry

  • Rank


  • MBTI
  • Enneagram
    2w3 9w1
  • Astrology Sign
  • Brain Dominance


  • Biography
    Enjoy helping others - making the world a better place.
  • Location
    Colorado Springs, CO
  • Occupation
    wandering free spirit
  • Interests
    Flying, volleyball, skiing, running
  • Gender
  • Personal Text
    You give as good as you get.

Recent Profile Visitors

5,157 profile views
  1. Omfg!!!!! You picked the wrong major - shit........ I have been coding since I was 11 so that makes 40 years and have never not loved doing it! This is stuff I have done for purely passionate enjoyment for nothing before I got hired in 1986 and got paid for the first time to do something other than help bake 3,000 loaves of bread daily. Whatever you attempt, if this is something you strongly dislike doing, then I would not even attempt to secure a software engineering or programming position. Look at some of the other skills you had including some of the other classes you took doing your degree. You did successfully graduate! So consider this. You graduated in a major you dislike! That means you were intelligent and persevering enough to fight your way through that. Now imagine you actually found something that turned you on! Your focus right now is to find out that thing you love to do that you would do for free? If you could do any job what would it be? And then start taking steps to get training and education on that. Sorry you went down this path but you will eventually find your way. Good Luck!
  2. I fully expect to be awarded 100% full custody. It is how she wants it.
  3. 100% yes!!!!! Despite the storms I am weathering, a co-worker asked me a question...... 'Jerry - how are you holding it together - you give off such a positive vibe. That is why a lot of women here like you". I told her that 30 years ago, a lot of my self-doubts screamed to people 'stay the hell away from me - I am no good and I am not worth it'. Today, I know I am fighter and a survivor. Two beautiful daughters. I love my job and my teammates. I look at what I still do have and think 'ya know - it still could be a hell of a lot worse'..... much still to be grateful for! I absolutely am worth it!!!! And the quality of being lovable is a gift from God. Something I can do that machines cannot!
  4. I've got four younger sisters and all four of them early in their careers told me that my warnings to them were spot on regarding sexism and demeaning behavior. Much of that behavior was probably not with any ill will.... just poor habits in a patriarchal culture that propagated over the decades. But, again, the problem was looking at teammates differently because they were women. Interestingly, one thing I have witnessed several times over the years is women being treated unfairly by other women! And I figured some of this out. Some of the women I worked with/for once they were promoted into leadership did not want to be perceived as as giving their sister co-workers an unfair break because of their gender. I have watched friendships and decent work relationships disintegrate before my eyes over this. It is hard to be gender-blind in the workplace (similar to being race or religion-blind), I get that. Human nature. But the goal is we need to look at our teammates as teammates first before anything. Kind of funny, but I would love to work at a place where we all had uniforms with our names and numbers on the back to remind us we are *team*! Play your position. Get open. Block that problem! Start the workday with a huddle then breakup (hands in - Team on 3 - One-two-three-TEAM!) I used to play co-ed soccer. I never looked at Lisa as a girl. I looked at Lisa as our best weapon because, at striker, she had legs of iron and could outrun and outscore everyone in the league. I never even looked at her as my equal. Because I thought she was better! I was just the lowly goalie that, because of her skills, had not much to do.
  5. Yup! Cohabitating after just a couple of months places all of the stresses and expected commitment from an actual marriage now into play. These two barely know each other compared to a couple from the same country that have built up years of rapport with each other. Personally, I would never move to a different country for romantic reasons. This is going to sound very unromantic and un-INFP like but my attitude is that you can find a potential soulmate on almost any corner. I live just outside a city of 500,000 with a city of 2,000,000 to the north by one hour. There are 900,000 single adult women within one hour of me of which 100,000 or so are in my age range. If I cannot locate someone acceptable among that pool then I'm either unmatchable or I have locked myself in a closet.
  6. nfw
  7. Yup! And keep a diary. I've been living this nightmare for two years now and it will be coming to an end by the end of this year. My complication is that there are kids.... but this is being worked on. Without kids? Try to discuss. Failing that, cut and run!
  8. I think 0987654321 may be right. You need to be careful. Maybe there is not anything you are seeing but there are warning signs based on your story. This is the chief reason why I avoid LDR's like the plague now - especially if we are in two different countries. Too many complicated problems. Your housing situation is difficult, yes, but please watch yourself! Good Luck! ...... added to this post 3 minutes later: One other thing - he needs to get rid of the Airbnb arrangement. Get some place smaller and cheaper or get a second job. I can just imagine the frustration of wanting alone time with my S.O. and there are four people on the other side of the wall in the same flat...
  9. Welcome to the dungeon! ...... added to this post 0 minutes later: Me too - I'm trying to collect the whole set....
  10. Welcome to the dungeon! Consider us all an eclectic collection of Bill Romanowski's --- if we take an unexpected shot at you, it is our way of saying "Hey, welcome to the NFL; we like you!" Seriously though, you will find an amazing group of individuals here. Since I am INFP, in time you will observe others rolling their eyes at me since they are not sure whether to mock me or just feel sorry..... lol
  11. Welcome to the dungeon! When we transitioned from vBulletin to IPS, a few of us did encounter problems with registration and other technical glitches. I would have blamed everything on @Neoaves but I've already used my quota up on her this month....
  12. Welcome to the dungeon! Romance is possible here in the forum but no self-respecting INTJ will ever admit that! We were already analyzing you before you signed up.
  13. This!!!!! Outstanding advice @Neoaves ^^^^^ All 8 women I have dated who were INTJ I was friends with first; some by a couple of years or more. None of them did I know what their MBTI type was in advance (figured it out or explicitly tested for it later). I suppose if I ultimately date anyone here then I *would* know in advance but that comes with a big huge asterisk since, after all, this is the "INTJ" forum. Unless someone here misidentifies or keeps her type a secret. But now we are splitting hairs..... lol
  14. I was talking to a captain in the U.S. Army last year at length about this topic and she had an interesting theory. Now, granted, she has a fierce fighting spirit that provided for her climbing hard through the enlisted ranks and then going through OCS to become an officer so she has a valuable perspective on this wage disparity issue. She believes that, for either cultural reasons or predisposed differences in how men and women solve problems, that men are much more aggressive negotiators when it comes to salary especially in professional positions. Her theory is that women, regardless of the depth of their expertise, often will take what is offered to them and not even counteroffer. Her solution is for women to become more involved and take career training classes that heavily emphasize salary negotiation as well as presentation of qualifications. At most corporations, your salary track is decided when you hire on and dramatic movement does not occur unless you change jobs within that company.
  15. Oh gosh!!!! No way --- but I did stay in a Holiday Inn Express last night....