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This is a community where INTJs can meet others with similar personalities and discuss a wide variety of both serious and casual topics. If you aren't an INTJ, you're welcome to join anyway if you would like to learn more about this personality type or participate in our discussions. Registration is free and will allow you to post messages, see hidden subforums, customize your account and use other features only available to our members.

Pawn

Members
  • Content count

    29
  • Joined

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About Pawn

  • Rank
    New Member

Personality

  • MBTI
    INFP
  • Enneagram
    9w1 So/Sx
  • Astrology Sign
    Gemini
  • Personal DNA
    Benevolent Creator
  • Brain Dominance
    Balanced

Converted

  • Occupation
    An endless wonderer.
  • Gender
    Female
  • Personal Text
    "To die, to sleep;
    To sleep: perchance to dream: ay, there's the rub;
    For in that sleep of death what dreams may come."
  1. So much love for us INTJs ^_^

  2. Haha, thank you :)

    Glad to hear you're doing better.

  3. I don't think I've laughed this hard today - thank you for that! :laugh:

  4. You're such a sweetie - I feel better already! :hug:

  5. Those who make kind, selfless and noble acts really give me the most hope. :)
  6. I have a very difficult time believing in it, so therefore, no, I think that if anything it's just infatuation. It's very easy for me to love just about anyone whether I actually know them or not, but as far as romantic love goes, there's just no way I would jump into conclusions like that just when first seeing a person. I've experienced lust at first sight, but nothing even close to what would be seen as romantic love. How can I feel such a deep emotion for someone I don't even know? I need to have a lot of time to figure out whether I actually love-love someone or not. There's absolutely no way I can fall in love with someone at first sight/meeting. But hey, if it works for you, who am I to judge or tell you otherwise?
  7. Haha, oh really? And here I thought diamonds are a girl's best friend! :p

  8. I can't help it: this is why "dog is [wo]man's best friend".

  9. Aww, don't make me blush - you are too kind!! :)

  10. This is a lovely post, and, I must say, is a wonderful example of the nurturing spirit and gentleness of a true lady.

  11. (All I can think of is the Dave Chappelle episode... What did the five fingers say to the face?) Welcome, welcome! I know how disappointing it can be: not ending up being the type you wanted to be (damn you, introvertness!). However, I don't think being an INTJ is really all that bad - there are many wonderful traits associated with each type, and there is a reason that this specific personality is one of my absolute favorites! You might find frustrations, both with others and yourself, but we're all just people when it comes down to it - no one's perfect (although I'm more than certain that someone is going to try and argue with me on that lol). And the scattered thoughts... ugh, don't even get me started! Anyway! Hope you enjoy it here. And get some sleep for goodness sakes!
  12. I actually look up to extroverts, and admire just how charismatic and outgoing they can be. Up until very recently, I kept typing myself as being an extrovert just because of how much I really liked them and tried to become one myself (which throughout the entire process I knew just how much of an outcast I was compared to most, being much more reserved and unable to shake off the feeling that most of my relationships were rather shallow, which made me feel an isolation that most of the extroverts I knew of really couldn't understand). Having being in a family full of extroverts and going through high school filled with them, there are a few traits they possess that can kind of upset me: 1). Extremely flighty with friends. They're wonderful to be with one-on-one, but whenever they take me to hang out in a more social situation, I'm easily left behind as they run off to everyone else, making me feel rather lonesome and awkward, being by myself. They also don't like to stay with one person for too long, and so the ones that I am friends with tend to just come and go all the time. I like it when they are here, but can't stand it when they're gone, and I'm the one that has to wait for them. 2). Unable to understand the needs of an introvert. There has been constant issues with this, especially between me and my step-father, but this can go for almost every single one of my relationships with extroverts. I love my space and private time, and while I really do enjoy being with close friends, I am easily drained and worn out and need time for myself. It's difficult to ever get that time around them though - I think it might have to do with the fact that most of my extroverted friends are also strong percievers, because they are often approaching me with last minute plans, and because I don't like to upset my friends and I always keep optimistic about how things might end up going, I don't say no, and just go with it. This kind of timing, one right after the other, just leaves me very tired and desperate for a moment to myself, no matter how much I might be enjoying it. And almost every one I know of gets very upset when I choose to cancel plans and just keep to myself in my bedroom. I get them on my case about this a lot, especially when growing up in my extroverted family. I really wished that they knew about MBTI at the time (although I'm teaching my mother about this now), because I really would have appreciated it if they understood my need for a break and isolation instead of constantly attacking me for it. With the traits that OP mentioned, I suppose that someone being nosy can get on my nerves, but only up to a certain point. I understand having a lot of curiosity, and being interested in someone's life (because I have these moments as well), but there's a time and place for everything. I think the only extroverts I've ever got annoyed with about this were the ones that were extremely shallow and selfish, because they gave me a reason not to trust them with private matters. Other than that though, I don't necessarily mind it if an extrovert wants to know something, as I know that they might not like being left out of the loop with any of their friends. I love it when people talk a lot! This is especially the reason that I kept mistyping myself as an extrovert, because I can usually do nothing else but talk, talk, talk. It's just because I really love having conversations with people, and can become very passionate about almost everything, so it's easy for me to chatter away once you get me to open up. And having a conversational partner who is just as talkative is very fun for me, as it gets the discussion even more in depth. I have no problem with someone who likes to talk a lot. Or do you mean someone who is always saying something, even when no one is listening, just to say it? Because then, okay, it does get a little bothersome. You don't have to say everything that's on your mind - like I said, there's a time and place for everything! And with attention whoring - depends on how bad it is. I myself love attention (and maybe this might be how I have also thought of myself as an extrovert, as I've never had a problem with it, no matter how flustered it might make me (although I think that this has to do most with getting recognition for doing something good than anything else, and even so, I've always tried to include others for the attention as well, hmmm...)), and so I can understand if others want it too. But it just really depends on their methods of doing so. I've known of people to bully and put down others for it, and that is just unacceptable. As long as no one is being hurt in the process, then I really don't care what it is that they're doing. Extroverts are fun to have as friends, but I have a lot of difficulty trying to keep up with them. I get along really well with ENFP's and ENTP's, and one of my best friends is an ESTP (who is always having something to do, which gives me the space I need for myself until he's wanting to hang out again). I really do love you guys. :)
  13. As an ENFP with experience being with INTJ's, first thing I have got to say: They are still just people. I'm not trying to sound condescending - everyone is just simply a human, in the most basic sense! Being infatuated with a specific personality type can definitely have its drawbacks, and focusing so much on MBTI can bring on negative effects (like the problem you seem to be having here). First thing's first: You need to understand that this is only infatuation. You might think you're in love, but I have to break it to you - you're really not, or else you wouldn't be having this problem. I can definitely relate to having your emotions get the best of you, but you really need to identify that this isn't love, you just think it is. A big giveaway is where you said that you find their flaws to be attractive. I used to as well, until I started being around them more often and actually got to know a few. Don't get me wrong - I really do love all the ones I've come into contact with (oh, what the hell - I love everyone!), but sometimes they can really get on my nerves! Especially the more bull-headed and stubborn ones - it isn't cute, and if anything, INTJ's have sometimes given me more stress and frustration than any other type! They are nonsocial, critical, precise, cold, unaffected by emotions, and can be rather cynical and realistic in a way that I don't like. While I do love being around them (why else would I be here and continue to date them?), there are times they really make me want to kill them, I'm not even going to lie! And you know what? I'm sure that I make them feel the exact same! It can be very exhausting sometimes to try and keep on good terms with them, without doing something to upset them or letting yourself get hurt (we ENFP's take things way too personal). How many INTJ's do you know of? I mean, have actually met, talked to on a daily basis, and got to know? From afar, they are definitely very captivating, and who are we to overlook their aloof and confidence disposition? Once you get to know them though, it becomes a constant roller coaster - always ups and downs in this relationship. Both the INTJ and ENFP will constantly get frustrated with one another, and I've never been in this kind of relationship without any sort of conflict or misunderstandings. It happens - no relationship is perfectly perfect, and trust me: the INTJ/ENFP is definitely not! There's a ton of intensity and passion, and you will always learn from one another and there is definitely growth, but it is not an easy relationship to have. It's quite the experience! I think of all of my relationships, the INTJ ones were the ones that made me break down and stress out the most. It was also when I was with them that I was most insecure and self-conscious when it comes to my personality and what it is that I say - unless they get me really into conversation, I feel like I'm walking on eggshells (or however that saying goes - you know what I mean!). With the ones I don't know of, I tend to watch them from afar, but get so nervous about approaching them at times, because I can't help but to think that they'll be easily annoyed (learning that it's not quite the case, but lets face it: us ENFP's can be a real handful at times, especially if we're too hyper and in your face). I mean, there's just a lot I notice and hesitate on when I'm with an INTJ. I overanalyze and think and worry too much - always have! It is just terribly exhausting to keep up with! Seriously though, they are definitely a favorite of mine! I could go into all the sorts of things I love about them, but the last thing you need to do is continue to fantasize. I can definitely relate to how you're feeling with all of this, but you just need to recognize that you're perhaps being too wrapped up in your thoughts than actually getting to know them and be with them. Reality can be a real bitch at times (if you're like me, you probably have a really difficult time approaching it), but it needs to be met. You have a husband, and you don't need to have your head in the clouds. You should really get to know some INTJ's first, like really get to know them. Make your own judgement based on your interactions, not the descriptions you read or what they say when here on the forums. This is unhealthy, and it's good that you realize this enough to ask for help. The only thing I can say besides "calm down" is to learn for yourself! Good luck! :)