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delavie

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About delavie

  • Rank
    New Member

Personality

  • MBTI
    INTJ
  • Global 5/SLOAN
    RCOEI
  • Brain Dominance
    4

Converted

  • Gender
    Female
  1. I think that's definitely possible. For our next conversation, I have a few statements and questions which should elicit responses that make it easy to tell if it's a matter of hurt ego or offended principles.
  2. I meant to draw a distinction between my actual intention and- for lack of a better way to phrase this- instinctual desire to make everyone agree with me? Doesn't mean I'm planning on aggressively converting him.
  3. I don't mean to convert him, just show some substance to my religious beliefs as opposed to labeling myself without identifying my actual philosophy.
  4. Yes, it is. I regret having created that impression. I don't know if I can or how to fix it. ---------- Post added 10-08-2013 at 05:43 PM ---------- I guess I've fallen under the spell of thinking I can change his beliefs. He's pretty intelligent so his interpretation is far from literal. Part of my aim in our discussion was to open his mind, which I think is achievable if done in the correct way, ie the opposite of what I did... By him pushing me away, I've been unable to further pursue and amend my efforts thus I haven't determined if a change in his mind is possible. ---------- Post added 10-08-2013 at 05:47 PM ---------- I think the problem is more that he feels that I view his intelligence as inadequate or inferior, and this feeling is manifesting in the religious divide. He knew I am atheist long before this conversation, so I don't think it is principle based. ---------- Post added 10-08-2013 at 05:49 PM ---------- I did this about a week ago. I haven't noticed any noticeable difference in his behavior, so I think it's more hurt feelings around his intelligence rather than his principles.
  5. So I was involved with this guy (ENTJ) over the summer. We never made our relationship "official" mostly because we're both extremely focussed on our careers. Also, neither one of us has had much experience in dating so I think it was an unstated understanding that prevented us from making any declaration of feelings. As time progressed, our mutual love for philosophical debate led us to an argument on religion; he is a catholic, and I am an atheist, so conflict was inevitable. I hesitated to voice my opinion, knowing that I can't be diplomatic in such a situation, but after his insistence I figured he could handle it. That was two months ago. After that conversation, a distance grew between us that I was initially hesitant to diagnose. I attributed it to circumstance, maybe his work became too demanding, or maybe his clearly-existent-just-not-stated feelings had simply gone away. But as the distance persists, much to my dismay, I sought an explanation, and have determined that it must have been this religious debate that put him off. To support my theory, I have noted, since the time of the aforementioned conversation, numerous passive-aggressive behaviors that indicate a trace of infatuation and emotional restraint. Although it didn't occur to me at the time, it wouldn't surprise me to learn that I had been too offensive, pushy, and/or condescending. I plan to ask him if I offended him during that conversation, but I need advice, would that change anything? I've always treated the concept of God and the beliefs surrounding it as a scientific hypothesis in need of criticism, so I can't empathize to know if my abrasive manner could offend a fairly thick-skinned person enough to drive him away from me. Would an apology be strong enough to bridge the gap if I am correct about its root? What should be said in such an apology? I don't think the only thing I have offended is his beliefs; I'm sure I created the feeling in him that his intelligence is not respected. I'm just not sure if a mere "I'm sorry" is an adequate remedy. On top of that, this didn't even occur to me until two months after the fact, so the advantage of apologizing before it festers is out. Any thoughts are appreciated. I'm at a loss to explain this sudden halt in the development of a promising relationship.
  6. 12", Holly, Dragon You scored 58 wisdom, 33 bravery, 5 emotional, and 17 martyrdom!
  7. Thank for all the input... Even though I let this thread die down (super busy at the time) I feel inclined to give a report on my experience in retrospect. I think I am an ENTJ. I was miserable, and confused about introversion, because for a variety of external influences, I completely shut down socially (when I say socially, I mean that I retreated to inside my head). I got closely acquainted with my Ni during this time, but my dominant function was totally deprived. Distance was right in that I am a young ENTJ, with a slowly developing Se function, and I had no motivation to get out of my slump.
  8. I have a very close INTJ friend who deals with a similar issue. According to what he has told me, what I have done helps, but ultimately it is he that needs to pull himself out. I start asking him "big-picture" questions: why are you feeling this way, what has caused this, what events are related to these feelings, etc. I just try to get him to start thinking logically about his feelings. If you're demanding answers, then he'll engage his logic. I see where it goes from there. Sometimes I pursue questioning, I just try to get him thinking, maybe about trends in his behavior. I don't know if it will help your INTJ, but it seems to have helped mine.
  9. Take, for example, an INTJ whose only developed their dominant and auxiliary functions. Would this individual be more inclined towards introverted or extraverted sensing? I'm trying to understand if an Ni dominant personality would ever have a more developed introverted sensing function over the extraverted sensing side, despite the theory that an INTJ is naturally more inclined towards extraverted sensing. And an extension: How can an IxTJ individual be "in between" on the intuitive function and sensing function? One of those should be very dominant over the other. Please assist my limited understanding
  10. When someone can't back up their argument but still say they're right when I've thoroughly disproved it. Or when someone smiles (seemingly condescendingly) at me during an argument. NO WE ARE ARGUING, NOT SMILING.
  11. Auditory Digital
  12. Introversion--Clear Intuition--Very Strong Thinking--Very Strong Judging--Strong
  13. Why get married at all? Whether or not a long-distance marriage is bad depends on your reasons for the marriage.
  14. In discussing philosophy with a professor of mine today, he identified me as an idealist (in reference to Platonic philosophy) as opposed to a relativist. I didn't have the opportunity to continue the conversation, but I don't really know what that category means. Can anyone enlighten me as to the difference between Platonic idealism and relativism?
  15. Nimrod Nim-wit this disinterests me theoretically, is that so? (in response to someone's idiocy before I demolish their argument) indeed?! (do the same thing, but with a sideways glance) fabulous, as usual (in response to how are you) leave me alone. the stimulation you receive from my company is not mutual. Do you need a hug? (said very sincerely)- that gets people to shut up really fast