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About Wilderness

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  1. You posted this in 2012, and I really appreciated it. Seems like you haven't been on here for a while but you're still impacting people!

    "Just say it as is. If you want something, be direct. Anything else will most likely lead to miscommunication, misunderstanding and hurt feelings. You cannot slyly manipulate relationships into being what you want. For example, if you aren't forthright about your desire to wait until marriage, having a few dates with a guy who doesn't want to wait isn't going to convince him to wait because he likes you so much. Trying to work through an incompatibility only leads to pain. It is an incompatibility and will remain so.

    Say what you require of a man in your profile. It might take longer to be approached, but you will be approached by the right kind of guy when the time comes.

    P.S. INTJs will appreciate a direct approach."

    Thanks for the heads up!

  2. I've got the worst fucking crush on you and it makes me regret declining dinner. But how could I have taken you seriously with that mustache? I'm shocked at the shit I think when I imagine what kind of girl would actually be attracted to that look. Yeah, that's vain and I probably could have asked you to shave it, but I don't believe in starting relationships by impinging on someone's personal integrity. If I can't accept something about someone, I shouldn't be with him. Anyway, it feels good to just write. Your presence in my mind feels like a cancer in my brain and I don't know how to extract it. I tried to create equilibrium, to give you openings to flirt and kiss me (even with that stupid, fucking mustache), to salt the earth so that there was no fertile ground for a relationship. But it's no good. Are you wearing fucking pheromones or something? I want you, even though I didn't want you (very decidedly was not into you), and don't even know you. It's ridiculous to feel this irrational and out of control. Grrrr.
  3. People like that are avoiders, wusses. No one deserves to be shut out that way, sucks you went through what I have noticed so many other posters have including myself.

  4. I'm so confused. Why can't we just talk about what's between us and where things stand? I don't get it when you talk to me then shut it down abruptly.
  5. Haven't been on here in awhile, but my friend on Facebook posted a blog with INTJ death stares and there were two pics of you. (Don't worry - I'm not creepy, I just have a good memory). I thought, how ironic. Perhaps you've already seen it.

  6. Going to find work, hopefully.

  7. Yeah, I really realized how sprawled out Amman is after living in Damascus. Going for work?

  8. Next time you're in Chicago, as promised.

  9. I don't know much about cars, but apparently it was a really serious mistake on a simple service. Plus, to TDK's point... I try to tell myself that too, rather than imagine that he was distracted from his kid having leukemia or something. There is more to the story, just as Dasterlyn has said. I need to put my faith in the idea that the dealership knows the full story (or at least more than I do) and made the right decision.
  10. I'm highly empathetic (even though I score as a high T) and happen to be racked with guilt over a particular incident which only marginally involves me. Long story short, a mechanic at a dealership where we took one of my family's cars for service made some kind of egregious error that could have caused the engine to break. As a result, the dealership terminated the mechanic who made the mistake. (I wish we had never been told about this as it was an internal decision.) I'm barely involved in the incident, but I feel awful. Apparently the mechanic was fairly new and it's obvious that the error was truly a mistake on his part. Of course, I don't know the whole story, but that doesn't keep me from feeling what I imagine the mechanic might be feeling. Worse still, I drove by a guy with a sign saying "Will work for food - mechanic" today. I kind of painfully stared at him and then went to Subway to get him some food, but by the time I got back he had disappeared. What if he was the mechanic and he recognized the car (same one from the shop) and that was the reason he left? I live in a suburb and there would be no practical place to go from where he was. Being too empathetic has gotten me in trouble in the past, in the worst ways. Obviously it's quite easy to manipulate me if I don't have my guard up (and since I don't lie to people, it's hard for me to imagine people would lie to me). Anyway, I just wrote this out to try to feel better. I can work on balancing empathy with self protection with my therapist, but if you have any tips, let me know.
  11. Meet! >.< and I cant decide. Amman is safer but I have more contacts and a place to stay in Cairo. And its easier to get around there.

  12. You will what me one day? ;) Eating mezze by oneself is so lonely by the way. Where are you heading?

  13. SO jealous! I wish I was in town right now! I will you one day. ;) Plan on going back to the Middle East soon so come join.

  14. I'm hanging out at Byblos on Madison and thought of you. I'm in NYC for a conference and I guess I'm lucky there are no vendor dinners.

  15. When I first saw the title I thought it was going to be about paying because you couldn't get a scholarship. As long as you aren't using "not dumb" to mean "super smart" I won't ask where your scholarship is, assuming private universities do scholarships where you're from.