Welcome to INTJ Forum

This is a community where INTJs can meet others with similar personalities and discuss a wide variety of both serious and casual topics. If you aren't an INTJ, you're welcome to join anyway if you would like to learn more about this personality type or participate in our discussions. Registration is free and will allow you to post messages, see hidden subforums, customize your account and use other features only available to our members.


  • Content count

  • Joined

  • Last visited

About Haven

  • Rank


  • MBTI
  • Enneagram
  • Brain Dominance


  • Location
  • Gender
  1. Very true! I would add to this thread: Try not to become too stubborn to change - change can be good. My advice to INTJ women: From being best friends with an ESFJ I've learnt that it can actually be liberating from our INTJ ways (and fun) to do things we may easily cross off as "too girly" or "beneath us".
  2. Interesting comment.

  3. I needed to read that! :)

  4. The purpose of this test is to help make you more aware of what you perceive to be rewarding and hopefully examine whether those things actually do, and whether you want to continue with your current reward profile. Maybe you will realize some of your reward drives are toxic to you, those close to you, and/or the world. http://similarminds.com/r-drive.html I was very surprised with the percentages I got for the traits (which the test explains in more detail) in bold: Narcissism 61% Unconventionality 88% Empiricism 77% Vitality 77% Othercentricism 5% Independence 94% Integrity 33% Intellect 66% Stoicism 44% Orderliness 61% Dynamism 28% Activity 100% Romanticism 33% Hedonism 0% I also got asked this because I had a high score for Activity: You can contrast your results with ESTPs here: http://some other forum.com/estp-forum-doers/142154-r-drive-personality-test.html
  5. I get the above but not what follows... ...it sounds like you have genuine feelings for him. What's the concern for? He's an ESTJ guy - they normally can handle their own sh*t. From personal experience this is true. They try to play mind games so that you become attached to them; and thus become pliable. P.s: I like your avatar pic!
  6. HahaHa! I thought that too. Anyway... ...I have a very close female friend who is black (from African descent) and is an INTJ. She has never had a boyfriend and has not lost her virginity - she's 23. She's not keeping it for any religious reasons but she's waiting for the right guy. When she was studying at university, which is where we met, she received a lot of attention from all different races but mostly Caucasian men. She grew up in a very ethnic diverse environment which is why she has no issues concerning her skin colour or the skin colour of the people around her. When we talk about relationships she always tells me she is colour-blind - she sees and treats people for who they are rather than for the colour of their skin. I know she could have had a boyfriend ages ago but she's very picky, anti-social and career focused at the moment. If I'm honest, you don't sound like an INTJ...
  7. Stubbornness coupled with a self-aggrandising nature
  8. "I don't want to ruin my body with pregnancy and childbirth." That there is the sign you don't want biological kids whether or not that is an excuse for another underlying reason is up for discussion in another thread. Be honest and tell him you don't want children and he can either stay married to you in the hope you may change your mind or he can get lost - you both originally agreed kids were off the table.
  9. You haven't met an ESTP.
  10. Yes when I know that they could ease my frustrations by telling me how they actually feel but then I always let that anger go by accepting that dating is all one big mind game: if everyone was blunt and honest it wouldn't be exciting and challenging and all that sh*t.
  11. How old is she? She could be bored and just messing about on Facebook.
  12. I chose 'Very important' because I want to eventually have children (no more than three) but I also want to go back to studying to gain a Masters and I have a habit of fluctuating between jobs so I could never see myself being the main breadwinner but I'm also a very frugal person and a big saver (always have been) so I don't need a partner that earns a lot of money. If or when I reach a state of stability I may soften my opinion but at the moment it's 'Very important'.
  13. Agree - I don't want to end up alone. I think when INTJs get too comfortable with being alone they forget and hugely undervalue the power of human touch and connection. Without sounding "airy fairy", I think we all need intimate human interaction every once in a while ... it can lighten your troubles and can make what seems like a cruel world appear divine. And yes, there are downsides to that so pick those people wisely and forgive them for their imperfections for they are not INTJs.