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About CallMeSpooky

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  1. No. I'm not interested in any items just because they are considered luxury. I spend as much as I please on food because I want to keep myself healthy, but I mostly prefer simpler food, so my food spending is below what the average person spends in my area, according to statistical surveys at least. Computers are the only thing where I really pay extra, but that's my main hobby. I spend very little on clothes as I have a small wardrobe and buy new clothes almost exclusively to replace those that have expired. When buying something, I normally don't buy the cheapest version because those tend to have horrible durability and end up costing more in the long and even medium term. I'll buy whatever seems like it will serve me well, but I'm never paying for brand names or prestige of the items. I generally only care about money insofar it grants me the freedom to pursue my interests and desires. Most of which are inexpensive. I have experienced money shortage, and it is indeed very constraining when you barely have enough to feed yourself, so it definitely is better to have some money, but for the freedom.
  2. Ouch. I score 85% on that Constitution test, and also know several importance cases of the US Supreme Court. Problem is, I'm not American and have never even been to the USA.
  3. I would like to support them, but can't fully do so. I like the idea of a loose collective that uses technical skills to do moral things like uphold freedom of speech or fight immoral laws. The group, though, should be more mature and more selective. Anonymous gives off the impression that much of what they do is just because they can, and not because of some carefully considered moral stance. It would also be good to see them do more useful stuff as part of their campaigns. They have the potential to educate, to provide facts or to otherwise contribute. Something constructive. Say, when something gets censored, it would be better to make sure it can still be found and distributed, rather than take down the website of whoever censored it. Instead of taking down the website of a hateful organization like the Westboro Church, it would be better to do something constructive with it.
  4. I find a perspective like that of Equinox to be fascinating, even while completely unacceptable to me. A scenario where the society benefits from tyranny is unimaginable to me, as I see the very concept as being against the well-being of society. In practical terms, the erosion of privacy mainly worries me because it leads the way to a loss of civil liberties and individual freedoms. I do not trust any government to do more good than harm with a comprehensive surveillance program. Great governments arise rarely. The vast majority will use extra power for nefarious things. I am, as most people, willing to trade some privacy for some benefit, but to me there are pretty strict lines as to what is unacceptable. Something like searching houses or listening in on conversations without warrants is unacceptable, for example. The anti-privacy things that corporations do mostly worry me because of conditioning. By themselves, most corporations can not do much harm, the majority can do nothing worse than to spam me with "relevant" advertisements. The overarching thing that they do, though, is slowly eliminating privacy as a concept. By getting people to give up tons of information themselves, it becomes socially expected to share private information. Already leading a privacy-conscious lifestyle is on the fringes of what is socially acceptable, give it another 5 years at the current rate, and not using any social network and not posting any pics will be socially unacceptable.
  5. Thanks for the link ! It is an excellent rebuttal. And he references my favorite security geek, Bruce Schneier !

  6. My outlook on privacy has recently become quite pessimistic, I fear it has essentially been eliminated. You can not expect governments or corporations to treat your personal information responsibly, and profiling, surveillance and data mining will only increase in prominence. Speaking of the general issue, though, the argument that you have nothing to fear if you have nothing to hide is an obvious one that comes up often. The argument is extremely flawed though, and I recommend reading an essay by Daniel Solove regarding it, the essay is the best rebuttal of the argument that I have read.
  7. I have a theory that any INTJ-ISFJ relationship can be nightmarish if the people are or have been of unequal status, like parent/child or employer/employee. The best thing to do is likely to turn on the INTJ not-giving-a-fuck mode. You save yourself a lot of trouble by not allowing yourself to be hurt by what she says, basically you may have to ignore her statements. It's not really like you have another option. She will continue saying those things because she has an emotional need to do so, despite the unintentionally hurtful effect. You are not going to change that. She's not in the age group where people change easily anyway. In my experience, it takes an ISFJ years to learn how some people see some of what they do very differently, and not to jump to conclusions about the intentions of others. And that's with younger ones more responsive to change. It's not going to happen in your mother's case. You may yourself be underestimating, though, just how important some "pointless" things are to her and her mental well-being. Like the redecorating that you call a waste of time and energy. Personally, I agree completely. To her, it's likely a necessity and not being able to do that would have a profound negative effect.
  8. I was 15 and a complete INTJ-style asshole when I had help from a person that showed me how to be a better human being, so sheer arrogance started decreasing then, I was probably 18 when my arrogance turned to confidence for good. And those are very different things. I am still confident about the things I actually am good at, but I no longer arrogantly assume nobody else is competent. Even more importantly, I no longer act like being more competent in certain areas also makes me a better person that anyone who's not as competent.
  9. As a strong believer in personal freedom, I approve of couples wearing whatever they both believe suits them. In the case of my wife, that meant wearing a mostly traditional wedding dress, though slightly modified. I was as fine with that as I would have been with any other choice of apparel that makes her happy. Personally, as a non-romantic rational, I view traditional female wedding dresses as odd - they appear to be highly uncomfortable, and they certainly take a long time to put on or take off.
  10. I do not really see why it would be much different for a male victim. Physically painful, happening under duress, very humiliating and embarrassing to admit to anyone, so overall very difficult to put it behind. I see those as the main characteristics of a rape victim's experience, and those seem like they'd apply equally to both genders. If anything, men might have more difficulty with seeking help or even just discussing it with a trusted person. The usual perception is that women get raped and men do not, adding to the humiliation.
  11. I would and I have. People can ask directly about secrets even without knowing that you know. Depends on what the secret is. Maybe your good friend Bob told you he cheated on his wife. It is conceivable that someone else, knowing you and Bob are close, could ask you if he has ever cheated on his wife. But for me the exact response to a direct question depends on the nature of the secret. I'll answer in whatever way best protects the interests of the secret owner. If it may be known that I know the secret, and knowing that I know provides no hints, I can say something like "I can't tell you that". If the very reveal that the answer to a question is secret would give the secret away, I'll give the answer that seems innocent. In some other situation I may feign ignorance of the subject altogether. Whatever works best.
  12. Having an ISFJ partner and a close INFJ friend, here's my perspective on those two. The ISFJ can indeed be easily made to do what you want in the sense that they will not object. Much of the time, they are genuinely happy to do whatever makes you happy. So in that sense, they can be seen as submissive. However, good luck trying get them to do even a minor thing that contravenes their values or violates their feelings (that often being the same). If they do not feel something is okay, they can be very, very stubborn about it. Together with their tendency to defer to / respect authority, this can create very nasty situations. If a figure whom the ISFJ accepts as an authority tells them to do something that is emotionally unacceptable to ISFJ, they can go mental trying to reconcile the conflict. The INFJ is so extremely dedicated to making sure others are well that they can be reduced to submission very easily. They'll feel very guilty denying someone's request even when knowing it's the right thing to do. Moreover, they have a superb feeling of empathy, so it becomes difficult to contradict not just the extremely valued close friends, but also others. Feeling of pity can be exploited. As far as my INFJ friend goes, that's definitely their main personal weakness - completely vulnerability to anyone who'd like to exploit them.
  13. I can relate, I was in the same position recently. Settled into a permanent working position about half a year ago, and the only people I know in the town are the ones I work with. At least I do enjoy my colleagues pretty much, there's good intelligent conversation with a few, and with one of them I can even see potential for a good general friendship. To me, the job is crucial in having some level of socialization. I'm a strong introvert preferring solitary activities, so without a job I could probably go a few years without really getting to know anyone.
  14. I'm good at this. Close friends have told me secrets in confidence, and I keep them secret. I do not share such secrets with my partner either - I'm trusting and open in a relationship, but I see those secrets as something that is not mine to tell. I also feel honoured when someone trusts me with a secret that is obviously important to them - it's a sign of their trust in me and their belief in my loyalty. The only exception would be if the secret is something such that keeping it secret would run contrary to my morals. If you tell me you abuse children, I'm reporting that, friend or not.
  15. 1. Rape. Basically forced sex through intimidation. 2. Rape. The woman is not fully alert and as such can not consent. 3. Rape. The payment does not matter, nor does the fact that it was a prostitute. A prostitute can still turn sex down if she wants. 4. Rape. Again, not alert - can not consent. 5. Rape. A marital relationship does not mean a carte blanche consent. 6. Not rape but being an asshole, as long as it really was "insisting" and not intimidation or blackmail. 7. Rape, unless she explicitly or implicitly (but still clearly) consented to sex without a condom. Since she got angry, she definitely did not consent in this case, thus rape.