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About Anodyne

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    Hi! hi! hi! les amants bizarres!
  1. Yes, I only ever converse with strangers who happen to be female because I want to fuck their brains out.
  2. How sure are you that your SO is an INTJ? I find it very hard to imagine an INTJ who derives so much pleasure in mowing and re-mowing the lawn purely for the sake of the pleasure, but I can certainly picture an ISTJ who enjoys doing this kind of routine maintenance (I'll not divagate into functional analysis here unless you think it will help) on a consistent basis. That you two don't talk about anything beyond the banal subjects of everyday life also makes me hesitate to mark him an INTJ: that you seem to indicate he doesn't even show interest in talking about anything outside his work or beyond the realm of senses; that his justification for maintaining the relationship is stability - that too familiar calling card of Si abstraction... But to return to you: it seems to me you've thought this through and truly aren't happy with this relationship, don't see it progressing to your own conception of what a loving relationship should be, and so I think you may just need to take the leap and see for yourself if there's something more of the kind of love you're looking for.
  3. All my wishes for your mother's recovery - really sorry to hear about something like this.
  4. If anyone sends you poetry it's a good sign.
  5. [Affirms the notion that you are "mature" and every P in the wide world should convert and obey the dogmas of J-ism, else suicide] Ah yes, and after dinner four days from now at 6:30 pm where I have made reservations at the best French restaurant (I go there every month!) we should plan to have a glass of choice wine and then by 9:30 pm at the latest proceed to teh sex which should allow ample time to wash up and bed for an important early morning meeting in which my full attention is depended upon.
  6. ... But I digress. I have to say, like others, that I'm happy for you that you were able to extend yourself like that. However, perhaps a consideration as potential warning: from what you describe, it seems as if this girl is the first one you've really been head over heels for. I would be a little wary about the notion of "just being friends is better than nothing". Not to say you can't do this, but it will likely take mental exertion on your part. And speaking from personal experience, it's not always easy. Just food for the future. Hope everything works out, keep us updated!
  7. This, in the conventional romantic context (without hesitation): key phrase "not thinking". Love as passion ablates fear for a certain duration, but if time allows and the initial surge ebbs then you are left with the possibility of questioning. I think, if you allow yourself an exhaustive consideration of the matter, doubt will always creep in; but if in the final analysis conviction remains and action follows, then that is probably the highest measure you can have of an ideal love.
  8. When my girlfriend and I watch porn together, all she cares about are the boobs.
  9. Can you expound on this device?
  10. LOL - thanks...

  11. Brilliant analysis, as always.
  12. I have to say that I agree with almost everything Oros Ull said in post #4, as I had a similar experience almost a year ago that changed my life. However, I'm not sure that is exactly what it means to have experienced a "true" "ego death". Although I too have never heard of this phenomenon prior to reading this thread, I instantly knew there must be some semblance of truth to it based on my own experience. I was high on marijuana one night, alone. The details are vague. I was probably reading something philosophical, although I don't think it was ontological in nature. Whatever the case, I recall suddenly being struck by a vast realization on the nature of desire, and although these moments are far and few between for a true Ni dominant on drugs, this time the afflatus was accompanied by something I have yet to experience again.. a feeling of terror, of fear in all its hideous purity, of death overwhelming. It is this that I liken to the death of the ego. It is beyond merely the material desire, which I have never been interested in, nor even of recognition, which I have only been marginally interested in; it is the unchaining of the mind from any selfish desire. Psychological death in lieu of the physical. Enlightenment, I suppose; Buddha, Gandhi, etc. Attaining this state of mind however, if one would even want to, is another matter.
  13. If we consider conventional memory, which I'll here define as the ability to directly (as opposed to, say, remembrance by association/connection) recall specific images or symbols, then I can safely say that mine is absolutely abominable. And certainly this is a function of my completely dominant Ni preference (read: total lack of Si in all respects).
  14. Sounds like a true creation of Ti.
  15. What types of things are you trying to plan/accomplish outside of work?