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    testing, testing
  1. Hmm...good point, albeit there doesn't appear to be any desire to save or include. Moreso the desire to other, another. Perhaps Ra Complex where the universe revolves around their internal beliefs?
  2. Dig beyond the NPD husband. Look to codependent relationship model(s) as a child.
  3. Baked chicken spaghetti but replacing pasta with spaghetti squash. Also, replacing bolognese with scratch marinara sauce to better meld with the lighter squash. Then adding mozza and parmesan. Would have added provolone to give it more depth of flavour but I didn't have any.
  4. While I strongly disagree with your subjective perspective on sexuality, I have to give credit for the post being funny as hell! You're awful. As a heterosexual but one with a strong sapio streak (can't say that I'm fully sapio since sex matters), it would be lovely if people stopped gauging others in terms of right/wrong, real/imaginary, by their own sexuality.
  5. Most of the men that I've been attracted to have been reasonably decent men. There's the odd one that wasn't but there was also sufficient distance maintained that nothing happened with them since they rang alarm bells that over time, kept getting louder. That said, none were criminals or abusive. As a teen, my friends and I used to hang out with some bad boys but there wasn't any attraction on my side.
  6. Good and evil is a form of black and white thinking. Oh wait, are you a theist?
  7. Thinking about this a bit, authenticity is a pet peeve of mine, likely from being raised by an NPDer who applied a lot of gaslighting. That combined with an older sister who has BPD, who was and is delusional, where they're both prone to black and white thinking/splitting behaviours, when I see it, it raises hackles. You are a person of value. Know that so you don't need to reinforce that with yourself and others.
  8. I wouldn't keep giving you a hard time if there was authenticity. What I perceive is that you still have a lot of ego defenses since you're always colouring/fapping yourself in the white/right/positive and others, painting them in the negative/black. Simply accept that you are a person of value and agency, not of universal value (there's very, very few who have universal value, if any) and work towards honest self-evaluation which includes knowing that you're a work in progress as many are, who have suffered trauma. Another way of perceiving it is that you're not perfect and neither is anyone else.
  9. Where I don't miss mine, not even a little.
  10. The two of you make me wistful for what might have been. You're both lucky to have had great fathers!
  11. Ah, so you're one of those who loves to fuck with the goalposts since you've reframed my point by redefining it as 'civilisation'. Fuck the civilisation aspect, look to the entirety of the homo sapien timeline. Irrelevant to my point that females had no property rights. Also, poverty level is a social construct. Females didn't rely on males for shelter, prior to the agrarian period since property ownership didn't exist. They lived in caves, in the open or wherever there was natural shelter from the environment. Also, look to Amerindians where the females owned and dragged around their shelter. As far as protection is concerned, I'm uncertain if there's evidence that males were the sole protectors during the entire time. There has been evidence that prehistoric homo sapien and neanderthal females suffered the same skull injuries as males which points to hunting and fighting. That said, since homo sapiens do exhibit body mass sexual dysmorphism of ~15% and did during prehistoric times, it wouldn't surprise me if males were more effective at fighting. I'm sorry that people have biases and stick to them, regardless of evidence that has been uncovered by anthropologists more recently.
  12. Space invasion is a classic sign of attraction, albeit it can also indicate comfort level. Look for other signs of attraction like raised eyebrows and overly long gazing into eyes with a certain look (be careful since INTJs are known for their vacant death stares when they're thinking), blushing/flushing and moments of being stuck for words since they're caught up in attraction hormones.
  13. Only for a short time in the timeline of homo sapiens, specifically the agrarian period. During the majority of the agragrian timeline, females had no property ownership rights and were forced to rely on males. During the vast majority of the homo sapien timeline, specifically hunting and gathering, it was moreso social packs where males took down the larger prey and females gathered and hunted smaller prey. This is a pet peeve of mine, that of attempting to apply Darwinism to incomparable issues. Fair enough.
  14. Wish you wouldn't do that, attempt to positively veneer over why it's been such a difficult process to find another. Are you sure that it's about them feeling uncomfortable about self-evaluation or is it that your approach to evaluating them, sets them on edge? NTJs aren't exactly known for our diplomacy.