[Trantor]

I've been called cute my whole life. Starting with little kids and ending up with my boyfriend.

I feel like I'm being treated as a little kid when someone says it. So annoying.

[Zodd]

^that makes you even cuter. always so cute when cute people don't like being called cute

[dontmesswithme]

Being called "cute" is a high compliment. If someone thinks you're cute, they're REALLY like you a lot. Cute brings affection along with it. If I think someone is cute, that means more than if I think they're just plain attractive. For them to jump into the cute category, I also have to have affection for them.

[JackCY]

it's a compliment and I don't mind it at all

[ppu6502]

I prefer cute over hot, both in reference to me and when selecting a mate.

[stoopidkitty]

Excluding ex-gfs, I don't know if I've been called cute in a way that referred to my appearance, but in terms of behavior or something I've said or done, yeah.

How about "you smell good!"? If that phrase has any sexual connotations, then damn have I missed out. =^_^=

[Xanthippe]

	Originally Posted by stoopidkitty To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	Excluding ex-gfs, I don't know if I've been called cute in a way that referred to my appearance, but in terms of behavior or something I've said or done, yeah. How about "you smell good!"? If that phrase has any sexual connotations, then damn have I missed out. =^_^=

"You smell good" can be very sexual. It can mean "I'm attracted to your pheromones; let's mate?" or "by wearing that perfume/aftershave you put in effort before our date, and it's working on me".

Because so many men object to it, I've tried to replace "cute" with "sweet" in my vocabulary, but it does tend to refer to actions rather than pure appearance. There's something humorous about a cute person, whether intentional or unintentional - whereas calling someone "handsome" or "beautiful" implies a certain seriousness. It's certainly possible to be both.

If a guy calls me "cute", I'm happy about it - it generally means I've been making him smile rather than moon over me. It also seems like I get called "cute" when I'm clearly able to laugh at myself, which means I've avoided the usual trap of taking myself too seriously.

[Frenetic Tranq]

	Originally Posted by stoopidkitty To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	Excluding ex-gfs, I don't know if I've been called cute in a way that referred to my appearance, but in terms of behavior or something I've said or done, yeah. How about "you smell good!"? If that phrase has any sexual connotations, then damn have I missed out. =^_^=

You smell good basically means she wants to get with you. If she's close enough to notice that and she likes it, she's definitely thinking good things in her head, or at least associating good scents with positive feelings.

[Samoan Corleone]

	Originally Posted by daedalus6174 To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	I hate it. It feels like a diminutive. Talk sense into me?

Me too, especially because I'm 22 and, damnit, I deserve to be treated like a man!

[MissionPossible]

	Originally Posted by Zodd To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	And pretty much all Asians look cute.

In America, sometimes I see cute, beautiful, or handsome people. Here in Vietanam I am absolutely bombarded with cuteness and beauty whizzing by me by the thousands from every direction. I am amazed every day at how much cuteness surrounds me every day here. Cute and beautiful are words constantly in my mind in response to the never-ending thousands of people that stream through my awareness each day I spend here. For women here in a part of the world where woman is assumed to be less serious than a man, it is easier to accept being cute, but yes, some here also balk at it once they understand the difference. Vietnamese men are often cute too, but unlike with the counterbalancing group of beautiful or lovely Vietnamese women, there isn't this big counterbalancing group of men that I would call handsome instead of cute.

Personally, I enjoy cuteness. Cuteness has this irresistible quality about it that says smile and enjoy me and "engage me". Handsome and beautiful are great too, they are just different. Besides, if I get to know a person, it is likely that I will find out that the beautiful/handsome person also has some cuteness and the cute person will reveal something beautiful. What we first see of a person isn't all that they are, but if they are attractive or intriguing in one way or another, that invites us to interact and get to know them better.

Be careful what you are ungrateful for. Some day you might not be considered so cute anymore and then you might find yourself longing for the days when people thought you were cute.

[Sethis]

	Originally Posted by daedalus6174 To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	I hate it. It feels like a diminutive.

If we're talking for men it usually is. But then again it depends on the context. Likewise it would be weird to call a woman handsome.

[WindUp]

	Originally Posted by dontmesswithme To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	Being called "cute" is a high compliment. If someone thinks you're cute, they're REALLY like you a lot. Cute brings affection along with it. If I think someone is cute, that means more than if I think they're just plain attractive. For them to jump into the cute category, I also have to have affection for them.

Agreed. "Cute" implies affection. Maybe not always to the point that it can be inferred that the person really likes you a lot, but that they like you on some level at the very least.

I also prefer cute to hot or sexy.

[ummon]

Cute > hot. Hot means society thinks you're sexually attractive. Cute means I could develop a crush on you.

[Selene]

It's just an adjective, a word. Nothing more can be done with it except receiving with grace for whatever its worth.

[Fox]

It's a polite compliment that doesn't necessarily refer to physical attraction.

[daedalus6174]

Thank you for all your thoughts.

I've always intellectually understood that "cute" is essentially a compliment and that it shouldn't really bother me.

But at a gut level, I find it frustrating for someone to find me attractive in a way that I don't think describes me well. I pride myself on my intelligence and seriousness, and I feel like being called "cute" strips me of that in a very immediate way.

It's quite illogical of me to think this. But I definitely feel as thought I am being slighted at times. When someone says "cute", I seem to hear, "Oh that's very well that you're serious and hardworking and intelligent, but ultimately you're just a naive teddy bear."

	Deliberator It's not diminutive or emasculating. It's a compliment. You're a human being after all; what, do you think that in order to be attractive you have to look like an unsmiling greek god 100% of the time? Gimme a break.

Thank you for your candidness. I suppose that yes, at some level, that's what I think. That's probably unhealthy isn't it?

	Thinker If you don't like it you're going to have to give people a copy of "The guidebook to daedalus6174"..... otherwise your'e the anomaly....

I am working on one. Only half joking.

	Zodd ^that makes you even cuter. always so cute when cute people don't like being called cute

Now that's just provocative.

	Selene It's just an adjective, a word. Nothing more can be done with it except receiving with grace for whatever its worth.

That's very good advice, thank you.

[SwedenF]

	Originally Posted by daedalus6174 To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	But at a gut level, I find it frustrating for someone to find me attractive in a way that I don't think describes me well. I pride myself on my intelligence and seriousness, and I feel like being called "cute" strips me of that in a very immediate way.

I would try to see it as a comment on your exterior. Separate it from your mind, and perhaps you'll be able to interpret it more as a intelligent person with teddy bear cover.

Oh and, you could always try watching all seasons of Sex and the City. It might de-sensitize you, because they use it ALL the time. And purely for looks. Heck, they even use it about a dead guy in one episode xD

I kind of like the word, but it depends very much on context and who says it. I've had a rather major fight with an ex in the past when he called me cute, but that's because to him cute was not a positive thing. It all depends on what the person says it means with it. I try to interpret words as what the person saying it meant, rather than what it means to me. After all, they said it, makes more sense to look at their definition than my own.

[Moxiie]

BWAHAHAHAHAHA!! Wanna know what's super cute??

THIS THREAD.

This thread is why ENFP's love INTJ's - this thread itself is so damned cute, mostly INTJ's discussing in depth the pro's and con's of "cute"

Like someone earlier said, it makes hearts come out of my head.

To me, cute doesn't have sexual connotations at all, when I call a guy cute - it's more about a behavior that makes my heart expand just a little bit when observed behavior occurs.

The caveat being that if I say it to an individual, it's likely because I'm romantically attracted to said individual, but the notion itself does not, in and of itself, denote sexual attraction.

[nowt]

Depends how competently they speak English. Prefer 'neat'.

[daedalus6174]

	Originally Posted by Moxiie To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	BWAHAHAHAHAHA!! Wanna know what's super cute?? THIS THREAD.

Why? What kind of actions trigger these feelings in you? When someone is serious and focused? What else is cute in the world besides threads like this? Is Dexter the serial killer cute? Is Barack Obama cute? Is Eeyore cute? Are teddy bears cute? Are babies cute?

Are there different types of cuteness in your mind?

Not trying to be aggressive, genuinely trying to understand here.

	Swedenf I would try to see it as a comment on your exterior. Separate it from your mind, and perhaps you'll be able to interpret it more as a intelligent person with teddy bear cover.

I think my actions are perceived as cute more than my exterior (though I think I'm fairly attractive), so it's hard to think of it that way.

[SwedenF]

	Originally Posted by daedalus6174 To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	Is Eeyore cute?

If that wasn't because of my avatar, I'll eat my hat xD Cute wouldn't be my first choice of word for Eeyore, more like, awesometastic.

	Originally Posted by daedalus6174 To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	I think my actions are perceived as cute more than my exterior (though I think I'm fairly attractive), so it's hard to think of it that way.

That does make it harder, yes. Could you give an example of what kind of action we're talking about? Because depending on what it is, I could definitely see why it'd bug you and feel sort of condescending.

[Moxiie]

	Originally Posted by daedalus6174 To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	Why? What kind of actions trigger these feelings in you? When someone is serious and focused? What else is cute in the world besides threads like this? Is Dexter the serial killer cute? Is Barack Obama cute? Is Eeyore cute? Are teddy bears cute? Are babies cute? Are there different types of cuteness in your mind? Not trying to be aggressive, genuinely trying to understand here.

I think when INTJ's get so serious and go so deep about pretty much anything that it's just cute...there's something very heartwarming and sincere about it. I don't know if I could explain it adequately as it's a visceral reaction I have about such things.

So yes, when someone is so serious and focused about such a lighthearted topic. Cute. Just cute.

My definition of cute varies with the topic at hand

[Shadizar]

I hate being called cute! In no sense of the word can I be referred to as cute. If you're calling me cute, then you got a seriously damaged sense of association, or you're just plain mocking me; in either case, there's no sense continuing any form of conversation beyond that point.

[Nostalgia]

It is just a word, but like any other word it may carry some subjective connotations, depending on your particular circumstance, situation and environment.
Personally I am not susceptible to any form of flattery, I will acknowledge it as a plain simple compliment, much like every other flattery words, it holds no sway over me either way.

[Minerva]

	Originally Posted by daedalus6174 To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	Thank you for all your thoughts. I've always intellectually understood that "cute" is essentially a compliment and that it shouldn't really bother me.

Your understanding is correct.

But at a gut level, I find it frustrating for someone to find me attractive in a way that I don't think describes me well. I pride myself on my intelligence and seriousness, and I feel like being called "cute" strips me of that in a very immediate way. It's quite illogical of me to think this. But I definitely feel as thought I am being slighted at times. When someone says "cute", I seem to hear, "Oh that's very well that you're serious and hardworking and intelligent, but ultimately you're just a naive teddy bear."

Yes, it is easy to associate cute with

To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

but it also depends on a woman's vocabulary which is a function of her age, her location, who she hangs out with, how well read she is etc. In high school and college I was one of the few young woman who would differentiate among handsome, attractive, good looking and cute. Most girls, when they saw a good looking guy, would automatically say "He's so cute!"

You shouldn't feel stripped of any of your other qualities. You seem to be combining the physical with the intangible. The compliment of "cute" is a comment on your outer appearance, not on your intelligence or your attitude. You really should separate the two especially because for many, the first evaluation begins with the visual.

	Thank you for your candidness. I suppose that yes, at some level, that's what I think. That's probably unhealthy isn't it?

I would not call it unhealthy, I would call it "needing a change in perspective"

Some food for thought: Would you rather be called "ugly", "unattractive","e
To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
gross" or "cute"? Be thankful for what you got!