[Canopus]

Context for me is everything:

In some sort of business setting - shaking hands, no big deal, happens all the time, no concerns or issues, routine, happens daily, lots

Male touches me - like a slap on the back - it totally creeps me out and I'm about to go ballistic

Female touches me - it's my spouse - all the time, any time, any place - I'm very, very touchy feely with my spouse, always hold hands in public, touching in some way, sit close together at home, etc

Other female touches me - if it is a friend - like a touch on the arm while conversing deeply - like it - feel closer to her, but not feel anything sexual - unknown female touches - creepy and I'm about to go ballistic - don't like me space invaded by strangers

[ischuldt]

I like it for the most part in relatively private settings. I dated a girl one time who always wanted to hold hands when we were walking around in public. I hated that. I would consider that alone to be a reason to end a relationship.

As long as I feel like I have the option to not be touched I enjoy it though.

[SeverusSin]

Female touching is a basic component of interacting with men; bothers me none, excites me a little. I only read into it if the context suggests, otherwise its merely a component of communication.

[themuzicman]

	Originally Posted by castalia To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	Do you like it when women touch you casually on the art or back? How do you respond to physical touch by a woman you find attractive? Does it increase your interest in her and do you take actions?

TBH, it is usually a surprise to me the first couple of times it happens. Not that it is good or bad, but if it hasn't been part of the relationship previously, it just takes some adjustment.

[thesorehead]

I've had issues with haptephobia for a looong time now, but have worked at it enough that I can enjoy random affectionate touching. However unless the person in question is either
(a) someone I know well, a friend; or
(b) an attractive woman;
I still just don't like it at all. Furthermore it makes me very uncomfortable if a friend that I'm not attracted to starts escalating their level of contact - but I think that's pretty much normal, right? In general I very much prefer to be in sole posession of my personal space.

[KelvinDjangoTeo]

There is always this force field around me, I call it my space. if i let any female to touch me very frequently, you can say I'm interested in her.

[ummon]

Touch me and you'll find my fist responding in kind.

[Crazyblue]

I greatly dislike people touching me, but I have a feeling it has more to do with other factors in my life rather than personality type.

[MechanicalSun]

When some random girl tries to touch me I say,
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[Muse]

Depends on the context.

If i'm with someone already; unwanted.

If i'm attracted to her; I will think about it.

If i'm not attracted to her; a bit awkward.

[Cozzine]

I don't like being touched, by males or females. I find it very awkward. I don't like hugging as an example.
I work with a married guy who will just randomly pat me on the shoulder sometimes after our conversation and he goes to leave. That really throws me off. One time he was leaning over showing something, and put a hand on my shoulder. I almost shot backwards in my chair.
I think he noticed, because his body language seemed a little uncertain and confused, and he kind of took off at the end. I think he is just a touchy-feely guy.

[Person056]

i only let people i care about and connect with to touch me. that could mean a lot of things when it comes to a female. do i consider you a close friend? am i romantically interested in you? are you someone i appreciate? are you someone i admire? someone i respect?

chances are a yes to any of those questions means i would let the female touch me and the more of those questions answered "yes" the more likely i would want to be touched or try touching her.

i hate when anyone tries to touch me outside of this context and touchy-feely types are definitely not appreciated.

[TheStranger]

Like all forms of socialization, I avoid it (being touched). However, I avoid it in more subtle ways, such as giving others a wide berth. When touched, I don't shy away, because there is a social stigma attached to that, but I definitely don't initiate, or reciprocate the gesture.

I definitely have viewed certain women as creepy for what I feel as them over-stepping their physical boundaries, usually when there is an undercurrent of arrogance to their excessive touching.

[Bronze]

Keep your hands off me please. Do not touch me.

[JackCY]

Violation of personal space unless I know them very very well
or it's normal for the situation, such as ballroom dancing
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Otherwise, acquaintances and strangers please keep your hands and other parts of your body of me or I will collect them the same way predator collects his trophies.

[Innovate]

As stated so many times, it depends.

Girls in high school would touch me a lot; and sometimes it wasn't as innocent as the arm or back. :P If I found them physically attractive, I encouraged it. Some of them were just friends of mine that got a little "wild" when we were hanging out. I'd let them touch me or put their arms around me. I just liked it; I didn't get aroused if I just saw them as a friend, but the ones I was attracted to & dated would sometimes do this in public, and it was arousing of course.

Slutty girls were sometimes too aggressive about it. They have grabbed my crotch, slapped my ass, etc, and that pissed me off. Touching the arm/back is fine with me by most women. It's not crossing any lines.

However, when girls/women that I don't find attractive would touch me, I move away and glare at them. If it's family or someone I know just touching my back out of care, that's perfectly fine, but if some stranger, or someone I'm not fond of, touches me, usually it's not welcomed.

[s4nder]

That's the point at which I realize it's all a dream and wake up.
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[SeverusSin]

Wow, with all these invisible barriers its not surprising that women do not see INTJ males as an open invitation for interaction...

[artiste]

I actually do enjoy physical contact with people and thus with women.
But:
-Only if I know them
-Only if I like them (read: relative, friend or partner)
-Only if I am (romantically) interested in them

People not matching any of the above criteria are on the verge of getting a harsh rebuff or a smack in the face (depending on the situation/touch and my mood - of course) when touching me without my permission, as they therewith violate my personal space.
Luckily most people seem to sense that and ask inbefore.

If touching gets too frequent/penetrant, I tell my counterpart to stop/alleviate that.

To me it seems that that's a rather normal point of view for "us".


Regarding the "I could use a hug"-situation, I have to state that that's a totally different situation. There's no first contact from *her* which'd violate my perimeters.

[Lurch]

If it's someone I don't know at all or just barely know, then I'm immediately suspicious (why is this person touching me??)

If I'm fairly acquainted with her, I don't mind; in fact I like it and appreciate a friendly gesture.

That said, it's very, very rare for a female to initiate contact with me. I don't know if I creep them out or just give a "F*** off" vibe.

[jawa]

It can be nice, but it's mostly uncalled for. If they aren't interested, why bother?

Or maybe they're interested and I just don't notice and am not fully comfortable with it.

[Othesemo]

If I like them, I love it.

If I don't know them, it's weird.

If I don't like them, I usually start making death threats in german.

[stoopidkitty]

I don't mind it at all. However, I hate when someone wants to have a conversation while standing a foot away from me, and then when I back up a couple feet they immediately move a couple feet closer. Pisses me right off.

[FruitLoop]

I love it when chix touch me. Love a nice bum grab, hug, smooch, spider jump, anything! Bring it on, makes me laugh!!

[artiste]

	Originally Posted by stoopidkitty To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	However, I hate when someone wants to have a conversation while standing a foot away from me, and then when I back up a couple feet they immediately move a couple feet closer. Pisses me right off.

A friend of mine (ENTJ, male) happens to initiate this "dance" in every conversation.. It's plain awkward, but I bet funny to observe - he inches in, I step away, he inches in, I let him bump into my elbows, knees etc.
I tried talking him out of this, but I figured it's just the way he's (and others doing that as well) wired..
There's things we just gotta accept, I guess.