[Polymath20]

When a loved one does that it's very meaningful and reassuring to me.

[masterpeach]

	Originally Posted by NicholasIv To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	Once it became a habit/ritual I think that would be the most comfortable thing, ideal even. Sure do love my habits To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

But what if she forgets it (she's an ENFP after all... no offense meant, of course)? Or stops it on purpose? Or just can't send a text because her phone's batteries are dead? Would that be a sure indicator of anything? How could I know? I'd be bothered.

[Warrior]

My wife kind of does this. She might go a couple weeks without doing it, but then will send me a text message everyday for a few weeks. I don't mind. I would probably find a phone call a little annoying, but a text message is something that doesn't interrupt me as much.

[CaelestisPeste]

I'd like it. It's too bad she doesn't know my phone number...

[NicholasIv]

	Originally Posted by masterpeach To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	But what if she forgets it (she's an ENFP after all... no offense meant, of course)? Or stops it on purpose? Or just can't send a text because her phone's batteries are dead? Would that be a sure indicator of anything? How could I know? I'd be bothered.

Of the possibilities, the mean of intent to harm in any would be nearly negligible, the assumption through induction based on previous experience is that they still love you and didn't omit the daily message maliciously.

[enfp_female]

	Originally Posted by NicholasIv To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	Of the possibilities, the mean of intent to harm in any would be nearly negligible, the assumption through induction based on previous experience is that they still love you and didn't omit the daily message maliciously.

This is probably what is happening here too.

What happens in the case that I am referring to is that the ENFP tries her best to rein in the effusive enthusiasm (somewhat, at least!
To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
) because she is cognizant of the fact that it is an INTJ she is dealing with here and she knows his preference for a little less sugar.
To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.


It is a careful selection - frequency, content, timing - everything is customized for this person. Frequency: It is regular enough to not be a totally one-off affair, but not so regular that you can set your watch to it! (ENFP here, people, not ISTJ! LoL!) Content: It is fairly low-key in the emotional tone of the content, but still enough to send the message that you are being thought about. Once in a while, it is sugary, cloying and *totally* ENFP gush, but that type is restricted to really once in a while only! :D Timing: It is timed to not interfere with serious work, because that is something she *knows* will irritate.

For the large part, the response is also equally timely, loving and really quite sufficient. :-) And both parties are sufficiently prompt and responsive normally to know that the lack of response either means that the other party is busy or that the conversation has come to a meaningful close or that the message does not warrant a response. Both know that if a specific response is in fact sought, it can be reiterated in the form of a question. Both know that if there was no response to something that did deserve a response, it would come shortly afterwards anyway; AND both people are responsible and accountable enough to each other to make sure that they *do* follow up eventually.

I would only worry if I didn't hear back for several days or something is amiss repeatedly. Even then, I'd probably not sit around and conjecture - would instead just pick up the phone and call, asking direct questions without hidden agendas or implicit messages!! :-)

---------- Post added 02-03-2012 at 10:31 AM ----------

	Originally Posted by Warrior To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	My wife kind of does this. She might go a couple weeks without doing it, but then will send me a text message everyday for a few weeks. I don't mind. I would probably find a phone call a little annoying, but a text message is something that doesn't interrupt me as much.

Exactly! The idea is to keep these 'keep alive' messages low bandwidth (as they should be, perhaps?
To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
) I personally find phone calls a bit more distracting than text messages. We end up ignoring the call, unless it repeats. And we both know to repeat the call if there is a message that needs to be conveyed and to not repeat if it was just a casual call. That way, each person's work hours are respected, but at the same time, we allow ourselves the room to spontaneously connect in the middle of the workday, if the muse so strikes! :-)

But then again, it was very interesting to hear all the views on this forum. :-) I made a mental note to myself about being even more careful about not overdoing this and to definitely take care to personalize it as much as possible.

---------- Post added 02-03-2012 at 10:34 AM ----------

	Originally Posted by CaelestisPeste To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	I'd like it. It's too bad she doesn't know my phone number...

LoL!! Ahhh... the defenses start from the root, don't they? Defend territory till it is verily torn apart! I never cease to be amazed at how resolutely the INTJ defends their personal territory. Even with an SO! But then, that is how you creatures are wired... and that is probably what makes you *so* admirably stable and calm in times of crisis!

---------- Post added 02-03-2012 at 10:35 AM ----------

	Originally Posted by Polymath20 To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	When a loved one does that it's very meaningful and reassuring to me.

Thanks, Polymath20 - it is reassuring to hear this too.
To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.


---------- Post added 02-03-2012 at 11:10 AM ----------

	Originally Posted by Looc To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	@some other forumemale I don't think it would change much if the relationship was long distance. "Hope that particular issue resolves today" seems better to me because it's more personal. If you want some real advice you should give us a couple sample texts if it's not too personal. Would be extremely easy to read the other person's thoughts.

I would have if it had only been me; but I think the INTJ would not appreciate it. Thanks for offering to help further, but I request to be excused of this.
To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
Just out of respect for that person's preference for privacy, really... Hope you understand.