[estar9821]

Wow, sounds like a ton of people have terrible parents....

Not so with me. I am lucky enough to have two INTJ parents who understand me very well.

It is my ESFJ brother who is the oddball.

[PHX80]

Both of my parents are traditional and US immigrants. They are both well educated and stressed learning. I am certain my parents think I am wasted potential. They claim I am/was the smartest of their three boys (I am the oldest) and that I should have accomplished more by this point in my life even though I have an MBA and will be beginning my MS in Finance this fall (got to do something when you get laid off...). When I was in grade school and high school I got good grades but they were never good enough. If I got a 98% on a test their response would be "why didn't you get a 100%?" Eventually I stopped trying since it was not worth the effort. I am pretty certain my Dad is an INTJ and my Mom is definitely an E.

Since I emailed them a description of the INTJ profile we have slowly moved toward understanding each other better. Though they still as me "why can't you be normal?" and "How can you stand being alone so much?"

In the grand scheme of things they are loving parents.

[Jennywocky]

Originally Posted by Coralaisly To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

I ended up going witnessing, and she beat the he'll out of me when she founf out I found a guy, walked up to him and said "i'm supposed to witness Christianity to you, but i'm not a Christian, and find this to be forced, uninteresting and pointless. What faith do you practice?" And when he said he was Muslim, I sat down and talked history and learned about the Muslim faith, what believers believe and how they worship. We discussed the interaction between Christianity and Islam and talked about the likelihood of a real peace in the middle east.

The deal with your mom sucked pretty bad... but you totally rock.

I had to put up with that bullshit too when I was involved in conservative Christianity, and I always hated it. I'd rather learn and connect than dictate/impose too.

[Anemoi]

Flawed. Needs 100+ friends, and more frequent alcohol intoxication.

[Senseofrelief]

I was treated as a threat.

[JWSJ]

I am like my Dad. My Mom struggles with other people, including her children.

They mean well, but it manifests very strangely.

Our relationship has improved over the years.

[crystalscar]

Geez, maybe I should start appreciating the fact that my parents are loving and kind.
Other than them accusing me of being anti-social, they generally think that I'm more intelligent and mature then most of my peers.(even through I'm not doing exactly well academically but hey, I dislike the subjects that I'm studying and it just can't get into my head. I can't help it.) I guess they are proud of it too.

All I can say is that I'm proud to have them. And I felt sorry for those who had a f***ed up childhood. I guess all I can say is that, life ain't fair.

[Dion]

My parents are totally my best friends. As a small child, my parents sold Minnehaha leather products like shoes and such in a traveling carnival --so I pretty much was a carney kid until I started kindergarden. I recall never wearing shoes and believing that everyone lived in a tent. My best friend was this huge biker dude named Spoon who operated the Tilt-a-Whirl.

Anyway, we moved a lot and I changed schools about 11 times before the ninth grade. I had to teach myself algebra and grammar so the other kids wouldn't pick on me. I've always been smart, but in a nonconformist kind of way. My parent's are the greatest; they totally accept me for who I am.

[ZerroDefex]

My mother was always trying to push me into things I didn't enjoy, like sports and school clubs. I can understand though that she just wanted me to be more social but she did try to hard at times, by my late teenage years she gave up and just let me do my own thing like my father was content to do from the beginning.

Fortunately I shared my father's love of firearms and horror/action films so we are able to bond over that. He gave me my first rifle when I was 10 and taught me how to shoot.

[Ilara]

My parents think I'm great. *shrug*

[stasis]

I was not thought of highly. But, I admit, that wasn't unreasonable.

[deckard]

Dad wasn't around so we're still getting a sense of who the other is. Still, love.

Mom and I were always close. I gave her trouble in the teen years but she knows who I am better than anyone.

No conflict with either. They're both a piece of me, and I of them. What's not to love?

[Sprelious]

Wow.

I'm the beaver compared to what I just read.

My father is the greatest person I know. I've never met anyone with his kind of tolerance. I was a bit of a wild child. One night I borrowed his car, got really drunk and stoned and took the car out on a pole line. I parked it in the driveway without thinking much of it. There was a big picture window in the kitchen that looked out over the driveway and the car was parked right in front of it. When I got up and came downstairs my father was stirring his coffee. Without looking up or changing his tone of voice at all said "I hope you plan on washing the car." I looked over at the picture window and the car was covered in mud. He didn't say anything else and I washed the car.

Another time I tore the muffler off my car and told my girlfreind no problem I'll get my dad's. I drove into the driveway sounding like a Sherman Tank. I walked into the house and told my father I'd lost my exhaust and needed to borrow his car. He gave me the keys and we drove off. My girlfreind couldn't believe That I asked let alone drove off in the car.

This may make it sound like my father was a wouse(sp), but quite the contrary. He's the strongest person I know. He just doesn't sweat the small stuff. He's 83 years old and I've never seen him angry.

My mother lived in her own little fantasy world. She believed what she belived regardless of facts to the contrary. It was a harmless fantasy. She was loving and kind and treated us all well.

No one in my family understands me, but they love me just the same. I know no matter what I need they can always be counted on. The same goes for me with them.

I grew up with a loving family. I can't even imagine what many of you had to endure.

[True Rune]

I was the nice one, not the smart one. I was a little invisible, but I have no complaints overall.

[rahdam]

Top dog across the entire extended family.
But damn, would they ever like for me to find someone and settle down.

[RachelAn]

	Originally Posted by dope To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	My parents would often tell me I'm an arrogant, ambitious, egoistic, rude, disrespectful, repulsive in all the possible ways, manipulative, aggressive wild animal, socially incapable, able to drive anyone nuts and out of control (meaning furious), and all the other nasty shit..

Dad - ESTJ :asshole control freak + traditional, conformist slave driver.
Mom - ISFP : casual, lazy + Docile people pleaser.

[Vermillion]

My parents were just worthless cogs in the machine to stupid to recognize my potential let alone develop it. They simply treated me like the arrogant, emotionally detached asshole I was, and concerned themselves more with what I wasn't than what I could have been.

Now there is a little love, a little hate but mostly indifference as far as how I feel about them. I'm well past the point of being able to blame them for shit that happens in my life. I have to move forward using my own strength now.

[Dru]

hell if i know... i guess since they called me "weird" and "goofball" a lot, they must have thought i was weird and goofy/funny. shy, smart, weird, but cute and funny. that was me as a child.

[kohreval]

I'm the outcast on my dad's side. An entire family of EXTREME extroverts, and I'm not even close. They still don't really understand why I'm the way I am, but they've mostly accepted it. We get along, but rarely see each other (my doing, we all live in the same town but I only see them on major holidays).

They weren't very involved in my growing up, though. My dad was almost out of town on business, so I saw him maybe one weekend every month or two (even though he had the standard two weekends a month divorce package). My paternal grandmother despises my mother, so naturally I didn't see them very much as I lived with my mom. They know very little about the stuff I did when I was younger, and I like it that way.

My mom and I get along very well. She'll the be first to admit that she doesn't totally understand me, but she has never tried to change me. I straddled a fine line when it came to trouble, and had a few run-ins with the cops, but she mostly let me run my own life. She always held the stance that you have to make your own mistakes to grow, and only stepped in if I was really going too far.

My extended maternal family, though, I haven't had any contact with for about 15 years. That whole family is seriously screwed up (alcoholism, mental issues, drugs), and I don't want that kind of drama in my life.

Overall, I actually had a relatively stable home life. There was an abusive stepdad for about 7 years, but he mostly kept away from me once he realized I would fight back.

[peppermint]

My parents loved who they thought I was. I lied and played the game for 15 years so that I could have a little bit of peace.
However, having so much freedom at college has made dealing with them difficult and I do not think they like the real me as I tend to be sarcastic and judgmental with them. Perhaps making up for all those years pretending to understand and accept their abuse? However, despite their current dislike of me, they have informed me that when I realize that Christ is the One and Only Way, I will be welcomed back into the Church with open arms.

[AkaruiRain]

No clue what my parents are, though my mom is a kind of extrovert [we think on the same level a lot so I'd imagine something near NTJ], and I grew up with the come/go father figures so not sure what to say to that. I do now have a laid-back stepfather who is more of a friend/acquaintance, tried out the "dad" thing, but I suppose I was too old already for it to really work.

I love my parents, but sometimes I wish they'd let me do my own things. Like be with who I want for example. Had to break up with a guy because my family constantly thought I was out, bout to get pregnant and such..

I just hope later in life they can back off and let me be what I want to be.

[KestrelLowing]

I'm so thankful for my parents. My mom's my best friend.

My dad is probably an ENTJ. He was a math major, just graduated with a masters in CS, and has a lot of the same thought processes I do, but he is more more excited about people than I ever will be. He would get frustrated easily and would snap at people (and still does) but that's really the only problem I've ever had with my dad. Eventually you learn how to work around that though by inserting humor in the correct places.

My mother is probably the best person I've ever met in my life. She says that in college she was typed INTJ as well, and I believe it, but she has gotten so good at her non-dominate functions it's a bit insane! She can be anyone she needs to be, so for a while it was very difficult to actually get to know who she was. (Her job - music director at a church - requires her to be outgoing and very much a feeler, so she's learned how to be that) Once that mask started coming off (by her realizing that she didn't have to be perfect uber mom and have no personality except that) I realized how awesome she is and we talk on the phone quite a bit.

I don't know how they did it, but my parents managed to raise us so we hardly even thought of rebelling. I think the worst was that we would sometimes not clean our rooms. We always knew they loved us, and they said "I love you" a fair amount, but they were never terribly openly loving. Neither am I, so this wasn't a huge deal, but I do remember feeling sometimes like I'd never live up to their expectations. In reality, the expectations were all mine. My mom knew she never had to discipline me for not doing well in school because I'd beat myself up over a B.

EDIT:
As to what they think of me, I think they're proud. I've done well in school so far (I'll graduate in 1.5 years) and gotten some good internships. I've managed to pay for all of college by myself, and I'm even in a very stable relationship with a guy they like.

[Purgatid]

My father was absent from the time I was seven, until I was about 17 or so. I've reconciled with him. Both my parents hold me in an exaggerated high esteem on the account of my knowledge base. Yet, they don't understand my reasons for not pursuing an academic life. I've tried to explain to them that studying something I'm not interested in, to get a job that I don't want to do, to earn money that I don't need, is an absurd way to spend ones life. I've tried to explain to them that there's no point to trying to mold ones self into the masses expectations, and that conforming to what everyone else thinks I should be doing is nothing short of slavery. And it's slavery to a concept, not a person, which is much much worse.

[Winklepicker]

I haven't lived at home in about 14 years.

But...it took the longest time for my dad to get me (and vice versa), and I don't think he really does, still, but I think we've come to peaceful terms that we're just really different, and there's nobody who's more proud of me than my dad--he is ESFJ and so stinking opposite of me in certain ways, including being pretty traditional. MBTI really helped me with him.

My mom gets me a lot easier--we naturally think so much more alike in more ways--she is INTP, and she's my best friend...she usually explains me to my dad, so I think that helps.