[castalia]

OK, be honest now. Can you keep a secret? Do you get angry if another person reveals a secret they swore they would keep?

I am very good at keeping secrets. If a person tells me not to tell something, I will never tell. I was like this since childhood and it was very difficult for adults to get sensitive information out of me. The problem is that I though the majority of people were like me, but it turns out I was wrong!!! Almost every time I have trusted someone to not reveal some sensitive bit of information, they would tell others within hours of learning the new bit of information. That has enraged me so much that I have stopped telling people things.

Do you find this type of behavior annoying?

[rara avis]

I can keep a secret best if it makes sense to keep it. If it doesn't intuitively make sense to me not to tell, it's a major pain because I have to manually remember to isolate that knowledge.

I'm not naturally stingy with information, so keeping an arbitrary secret can stress me a little bit. I have slipped with someone else's info a time or two - thankfully not in a big, catastrophic way- and it always horrifies me and bothers me for a long time after.

Bleh, secrets.

[OJlovedNicole]

As and INTJ, It's relatively easy to keep the darkest of secrets. First, I hate gossiping. Second, I value my personal information so much that I know what it would be like if someone divulged it.

Unfortunately, when most people hear 'secret', it's already been identified as forbidden and special, so most people blab. Does it make me want to injure them? Yes.

How to I prevent betrayal? Don't tell anyone anything. If it's a secret, why do they need to know?

[Booko]

Yes, I can keep a secret. And it's a good thing too, since sometimes I am elected to serve on the Local Spiritual Assembly and we have to deal with stuff that's as confidential as anything a priest would be dealing with.

I don't get mad at others when they don't keep *my* secrets, because I never tell people things that shouldn't be out in public. I don't commit anything to print if I wouldn't be willing to put it above the fold in the local newspaper. I don't leave things on voicemail that I wouldn't want anyone else to hear. I am just careful about putting things out there that might come back to haunt me.

I am, however, deeply disappointed when people fail to keep confidentiality in circumstances where it's an absolute necessity. And after being disappointed, I send a letter to the national body so they can deal with it, because that's their job. Then I get on with my life.

But many of the things others think should be kept "secret" are things I have little respect for, like gossip. Anyone who knows me irl for the least amount of time quickly learns not to confide in me if it's something they shouldn't be talking about in the first place. I left 5th grade long ago and am well over that stage of life. I'm sorry if others didn't grow up, but that's not my problem.
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[GouldFan]

Yes, I can keep a secret and do a good job of it. I did experience some disappointments with people who could not keep my secrets, but I no longer tell them anything that I wouldn't want others to know, so that makes it easier.

[IotaNull]

Yes, except when the information I am privy to results in someone else being adversely affected. For instance, if someone is open to me about maliciously manipulating someone else (which has happened in the past), I will blow their cover without remorse.

[Allie]

	Originally Posted by castalia
	OK, be honest now. Can you keep a secret?

Yes. I can keep other's secrets; and so far, I only have those non-compromising/uncomplicated ones, and would prefer to keep it that way.

	Do you get angry if another person reveals a secret they swore they would keep?

Reveal my secrets? No. Because I do not divulge my secrets. If I did, then I have no right to be angry with them, as I would have been the one revealing my own secrets in the first place.

As for other people revealing other people's secrets....sheesh, if it is this complicated to say and untangle, then, see above.
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[thunder999]

I keep secrets easily, but if the person who it is about annoys me then it will mysteriously spread. As to others keeping secrets I am mostly indifferent and asometimes get people to tell me them just for the fun of manipulating it out.

[Warrior]

	Originally Posted by castalia To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	OK, be honest now. Can you keep a secret?

I guess, but if it is a secret, why would someone be telling me?

	Do you get angry if another person reveals a secret they swore they would keep?

Swearing doesn't have anything to do with it. If I was worried someone would tell someone else, I probably wouldn't mention it.

Having said that, I do appreciate people being discreet. I certainly try not to talk about things that aren't appropriate to share reagrdless of whether someone tells me to keep it to myself or not.

[Anima Mundi]

Yes, I can easily keep secrets and confidences and do not divulge these to others. Such a quality has even helped me in regards to secular work.

And I get angry if I confide in someone who then leaks the information to someone else. Discreet people are nearly impossible to find these days. It's one of the reasons why I no longer confide in others, and keep a certain distance from most people.

[Still Standing]

I can keep a secret very well, but I must first know that it is a secret in the first place. It's up to the other person to tell me something like, "There's something I want to tell you but I want you to keep this between us. Is that okay with you?"

Often, other people assume that we implicitly know what is shareable information and what isn't. But it's up to them to tell us, not up to us to guess. Same goes for our secrets we tell other people. Personally, I'm not aware of any leaks of my own secrets by other people.

[jinx31]

I have always been very good at keeping secrets, and a lot of people around me know I'm a good listener. They feel the need to unburden themselves to me, and sometimes it winds up adding to my stress. But something shared in confidence will stay that way with me.

I don't open up to others. I can think of about 2 people in my life that have gotten deep enough to really know any of my secrets. And I know I can trust them.

[Ericds84]

Women especially treat me as some sort of secret repository. Most of the things they confide carry social stigmas and inherent judgements, so I'm honored to have their trust (which I've never broken). I'm not sure why they tell me as much as they do.

[Imperator]

	Originally Posted by castalia To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	OK, be honest now. Can you keep a secret?

Yes.
To the grave.

	Do you get angry if another person reveals a secret they swore they would keep?

Yes, although it's precisely because of this I try to avoid the situation of having to swear someone to secrecy at all.

	Do you find this type of behavior annoying?

I find it funny, actually.

One person tells you a secret, and makes you swear you won't tell anyone. Then they go to another person and do the same thing.

Actually had one case where I literally said, "Who would I tell? You've already told everyone I know!"

[Puella]

I'm very good with keeping secrets. My friend told me that 90% of what you confide in other people is going to be spread. I don't know where she picked up on this statistic, but it scared me so much that I rarely confide in anyone anymore. If I do confide, I make sure that I know something really juicy about my confidante, so that if they do betray me, I will simply open the floodgates as well. And, if someone licks their lips and claps their hands when I tell them that I need to confide in them, I quickly create a very dull story.

[Megalomania]

I can definitely keep a secret. I've kept plenty of people's secrets without ever telling a soul. I pride myself on being trustworthy. I don't usually tell other people any secrets so I haven't necessarily gotten angry at anyone who cannot keep a secret, but I imagine I would be pretty livid if it was important. When you put trust in someone and they violate it, you have every right to be angry.

[placid]

yes, I'm very good with keeping secrets, I already have too many secrets of myself. I'll keep things untold even others didn't tell me to keep in secrecy, I contemplate before telling. I'm fine to do casual conversation (eg. food, weather, discussion on work) with others but I seldom reveal much of my information. In my 20s I didn't know how to protect myself, learnt my lesson well and started to be very conscious whenever I'm telling things about myself since then.

[freeeekyyy]

I keep secrets. I don't ask others to keep secrets though, because I have nothing to hide. If I'm willing to tell anybody, I don't mind if anybody else knows.

[Nemesis]

I have a pretty strict "ears open, mouth shut" policy. I will take a great number of people's secrets to the grave with me. Yes, I do also tend to get pissed off when others do not keep my secrets. It takes me a LOT of trust to confide a secret in someone, so when that trust is not honored, it hurts quite a bit.

[karenann33]

I'm not a big fan of secrets. Growing up in a dysfunctional family it was all about secrets. Dad confiding in me then saying "don't tell your mother". Mom overspending "it will be our little secret". Such a huge burden to put on a child. They did it because of course I kept their dirty little secrets.

As an adult I don't ask anyone (except my husband) to keep my secrets. If I tell someone something I assume it will get retold. Easy enough.

[Samoan Corleone]

I rarely tell other people my secrets, not because I don't trust them, but because a lot of the time, the fewer people who know about certain things, the better, meaning the best possible number of people who can know is usually one: me. Things I do tell people are things I don't mind getting out or things they're not in a position to tell anyone who might bite me in the ass. Therefore, I don't have this problem... yet.

If someone wants to confide in me something, I'll listen, although I'll warn them beforehand that if it's something I won't agree with (anyone who chooses to confide in me usually has a good idea of what I like and dislike) not to tell me, because there'll be a chance I'll betray them (like if they committed a crime).

[stock]

Originally Posted by Still Standing To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

I can keep a secret very well, but I must first know that it is a secret in the first place. It's up to the other person to tell me something like, "There's something I want to tell you but I want you to keep this between us. Is that okay with you?" Often, other people assume that we implicitly know what is shareable information and what isn't. But it's up to them to tell us, not up to us to guess. Same goes for our secrets we tell other people. Personally, I'm not aware of any leaks of my own secrets by other people.

This^^.

If I am not directly told it needs to remain confidential, I will tend to share. on one of the typology descriptions, they described ENFPs as being the best way to convey a message to the entire south sea fleet, thus it appears I am not totally alone. It is an area i try really hard to be aware of, as when young, I would tend to rant in an angry way to vent-except it would appear as gossipy. I will also share way too much information as I am so open, thus putting myself at risk for being a subject of gossip. Again an area i try to work on IRL.

[lifesight]

I keep secrets pretty good, at times though i had to go and tell someone else for the sake of the person's life! but in general i am pretty good secret keeper.
and no, i do not get annoyed, i am aware of the fact some people have a big mouth and can't keep a secret, i would only be upset if someone i least expect to talk, would go and talk.

[PotensCogitatum]

I will keep secrets unless there is no reason to hide the information (anymore), and even then, I only tell when specifically asked. If I want to keep something a secret, it will stay secret. I'm not very mad when people reveal some secrets, I expect that, butsome more personal things make me downright vindictive when revealed.

[tracemhunter]

I have always been able to keep things a secret but nobody in my family can. If I mention that I am thinking about doing something I get questions about it from everybody else in my extended family. I can't even tell my parents my ideas. Sucks..