[catzmeow]

I like that my boyfriend is big, hairy, occasionally smelly, athletic, muscular, and knows his way around a construction site. However, he's not particularly dominant or assertive, and he is often the quietest person in the room. He is the person you'd want with you if your plane crashed in Alaska and you had to live off the land. But, he never tells me what to do, and usually could care less what our plans will be.

I think the alpha/beta/omega nonsense is a bunch of hooey.

[Gobbbler]

Speaking of macho men, I went bowling with some friends just over a week ago and my friend's roommate brought along some of her girlfriends. Well, I talked to two who interested me. One didn't seem anything more than nice. The other one seemed a bit into me, but then kind of ignored me a bit later. So I find out later that she told her friend that she was into me at first because I looked like a tough guy and she imagined that I'd be all macho and a bit of a jerk (I don't try to look like that, I just happen to have blue collar roots and look like a taller Jason Stratham). After talking to me though she decided I was not that - although I am certainly masculine in at least several respects - so she lost interest. Now, she's a young girl whose parents pay for an expensive apartment downtown, so perhaps that's a type who wants macho. Good little girls who want to play bad for a bit and do something exciting?

As an aside, I do worry though that the kind of girls who like my look don't find a matching personality, and the girls who would like my personality don't consider me because of my look. It has been suggested to me before that I need to play the bad-ass, macho guy to fit my look.

[Napoleptic]

I assume you're not talking about just the physical aspects of a macho men, in which case I'm indifferent.

If you're talking about a guy acting like a dick just to get you to acknowledge he has one, then yes I'm turned off. I have little use for a man who is more concerned about who he appears to be to others than who he really is or who he wants to become.

And don't get me started on that "real man" crap. A real man doesn't waste time trying to define what that means in the first place; he just is and doesn't worry about definitions.

[KingCobra2kx]

	Originally Posted by Kisai To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	Ok. Its a personality type, not a horoscope or a bandwagon.

NICE!

---------- Post added 09-17-2010 at 07:31 PM ----------

Such Irony, the actions of a true macho man are driven by being overly concerned with the female’s opinion. They epitomize anti-challenge, and insecurity.

Of course they're unattractive.

[OrangeAppled]

I take the OP to be referring to meatheads. Some women do find those guys attractive, but generally these women are not the brightest people either, or they prefer to fit some caricature of femininity (ie. the "dumb blonde" is a nice complement to the "dumb jock"). These people tend to me more focused on physical things, which is not wrong, but probably less attractive to someone who may see herself as cerebral (which I'm guessing is the case with the INTJ OP). These labels describe exaggerations of types of people though, and I think it's important not to stereotype individuals based on them, because in contrast, they may see you as an uptight nerd, or whatever. A really buff guy who likes sports may not be a meathead or macho or anything like that.

I personally don't find the meathead, macho stereotype attractive either though. I do find some very masculine men attractive, but not when its exaggerated. A man can be "feminine" in some ways and be attractive to me also. Mainly, I prefer someone a bit more "intellectual" than "physical".

I think the macho types are usually in the exaggerated realms of masculinity & physicality. I also dislike black & white categorizing: alpha, beta, or whatever. People are so much more varied than that. My ex was always stereotyping men & women ("I'm XYZ, because I'm a man."), and it drove me up the wall. It also reeked of insecurity, which is what I think is at the core of these macho types.

[mindstate]

	Originally Posted by OrangeAppled To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	("I'm XYZ, because I'm a man."), and it drove me up the wall. It also reeked of insecurity, which is what I think is at the core of these macho types.

I have a coworker who talks like that, it drives me insane. If I am ever eating a steak and baked potato for lunch and she happens to see me she makes some sexist remark about men liking meat and potatoes.
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She has also mentioned that men like meat. She's obsessed with men and meat. Man meat? I think she's just horny.

[RedOrange823]

If by macho you mean the type that bodybuilds and then wears tiny t-shirts to show off, then yes I am repulsed

[dogwoodlover]

Originally Posted by castalia To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

Am I the only INTJ woman who is turned off by so-called macho men? I find that if a guy displays overt "masculine" traits, I get turned off quickly. For one thing, the self professed macho men I have known seemed were competitive with me very early in the relationship. Some of them are also misogynists and are very possessive of their women (they also seem to believe in the double standard). They also get incredibly jealous if I mention something nice about another man (e.g., he is handsome/very talented, etc.) It seems to me that on the inside, macho men are increadibly insecure and have to manipulate the relationship at all times in order to keep on top. These men have always been bad news for an independent chick like me. I'd like to know if there are other INTJ women who have experienced the above.

The massive, overwhelming majority of "macho" guys are insanely insecure, which I think is often the source of their "macho-ness," which is a front.

In my mind, "macho-ness" conflicts with real masculinity, because one of the pillars of masculinity is self-confidence/self-esteem.

Some women fall for the "macho" act (hence why these guys tend to get girls), but the fact of the matter is, most of these girls eventually figure out that it is in fact a front, and serves to mask weakness.

Just a thought.

EDIT:

Referencing MMA, guys like Brock Lesnar typify the "macho" act, while someone like Fedor Emelianenko demonstrates actual masculinity.

[elizabeth lover]

macho is disgusting. manly, however, is hot.

[undertow]

	Originally Posted by catzmeow To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	I like that my boyfriend is big, hairy, occasionally smelly, athletic, muscular, and knows his way around a construction site.

You can't imagine how much that turned me off.

[catzmeow]

	Originally Posted by undertow To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	You can't imagine how much that turned me off.

It totally turns me on, which since I'm dating him, is probably what matters.

[Tocsin]

Somebody posted this in the "a little respect in the R&M subforum please" thread


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I think this is about as "un-macho" as you can get... at least without a sex change.

At least now I think I know what the opposite of penis-envy is.

I suppose we could always do the Buffalo Bill mangina dance (from "Silence of the Lambs")while listening to
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[Samoan Corleone]

Macho men = parasites.