I'm So Bored; Please Amuse Me - The Wrong Answer Game - Page 318

**SelfInflected** · 06-12-2009, 11:16 PM

They paid large numbers of the scout honeybees to fly to the end of the universe where they pollinated the boundaries of reality. Upon their return, the honeybees created time travel and became the supreme beings of Earth, but in another dimension.

Edit:

	Originally Posted by Synchronicity To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 15 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	A reeeeeeeeeeeeeeally long tape measure. Why do stars twinkle?

Because they're hitting on you.

Why do big creatures eat smaller ones?

**Stratego** · 06-13-2009, 08:43 AM

They're not eating them, they're just tucking them away to tidy up.

Where do dreams come from?

**ssrprotege** · 06-13-2009, 12:02 PM

From s*** (I mean, stuff that comes out via the rectum).

Who made the pianoforte?

**Stratego** · 06-13-2009, 12:12 PM

After the Visigoths sacked Rome in 500 AD, the new Emporer was determined to strengthen Rome's defenses against future barbarian attack. In 517 the first stone wall of the Pianoforte was completed, which means "those bastards are never going to get our goat again" in Italian.

How does the telephone work?

**Jonathan Brewer** · 06-14-2009, 11:48 AM

Ingeniously engineered electrodes coated with translucent peanut butter facilitate the transmission of human phonology.
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What do hands, gloves, and the pentagon have in common?

**BobbitSneazer** · 06-14-2009, 05:22 PM

The pentagon was built by people who had no hands but wore gloves on their feet.

**Sequoia** · 06-14-2009, 08:27 PM

Who hid the question?

**Synchronicity** · 06-14-2009, 08:48 PM

I did. It was offensively normal-sounding so I erased it from time.

Why are they called apartments if they're always together?

**Night Runner** · 06-14-2009, 08:54 PM

The word apartment actually means AP-art-ment, i.e. a unit of containment of art created by high school students in AP (advanced placement) classes. But then bureaucrats got their hands on it and we all know the rest...
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Why are saxophones yellow?

**Synapse** · 06-15-2009, 07:37 AM

Because silver was too expensive and any other color would be too normal.

Why do people believe in deities?

**Stratego** · 06-15-2009, 07:52 AM

Because it makes prefect sense, of course.

What's the cause of global warming?

**Synapse** · 06-15-2009, 08:14 AM

Because Bush got too cold and decided to turn up the temperature on the earth by making a coalition from the Taliban that garnered enough strength to turn up the thermostat on the back of the earth.

How do you change a lightbulb?

**Seriously** · 06-15-2009, 08:39 AM

Get a man to do it for you.

Which came first the chicken or the egg?

**Stratego** · 06-15-2009, 08:52 AM

They claim that it was at the same time, but that rarely happens. I think the Egg was faking it.

Why don't we have universal health care?

**MrWho100** · 06-15-2009, 09:11 AM

Because the Xylopians in the Andromeda Galaxy refused to sign the treaty creating it, therefore making the whole thing null and void.

Where did all the Dodos go?

**Seriously** · 06-15-2009, 09:16 AM

Dodos were a staple food for unicorns. Unicorns are greedy beasts, ate the dodo's and then staved to death themselves. Serves them right really.

What's at the bottom of wells?

**Synapse** · 06-15-2009, 10:44 AM

Bodies and fungus, along with unicorn horns.

Why does a woodpecker attack trees?

**Seriously** · 06-15-2009, 11:01 AM

It's not attacking the tree. It's making sweet sweet love to it. Over and over. Hence the term "love hurts" which was first coined by a tree.

Why don't humans have pouches like kangaroos?

**SelfInflected** · 06-15-2009, 12:15 PM

Too hard to clean.

Why do rats have hairless tails?

**Jonathan Brewer** · 06-15-2009, 03:11 PM

Religious standards require them to shave their tails.

What is the recipe for homemade cinnamon rolls?

**Synchronicity** · 06-15-2009, 03:13 PM

Dump cinnamon and sugar into your gas tank and start the engine. Drive around the block twice, then idle in 3rd gear for 15 minutes or until golden brown.

What creates the water pressure in our plumbing?

**Jonathan Brewer** · 06-15-2009, 03:30 PM

The intense amounts of human gas that aren't flushed out during purification.

What happens if you eat five pounds of chocolate in one sitting?

**Stratego** · 06-15-2009, 04:57 PM

Your mouth will be tired but the chocolate will loovvve you.

What happens if you don't scratch an itch?

**Jonathan Brewer** · 06-15-2009, 05:26 PM

Spontaneous combustion. (I have this on good authority.)

Where did Monte learn all his math?
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**Winston** · 06-15-2009, 05:44 PM

From his head. It is his math, after all.

What do cats think about?

06-13-2009, 08:43 AM	#7927
Stratego Veteran Member [57%] MBTI: InTJ Join Date: Mar 2009 Posts: 2,283	They're not eating them, they're just tucking them away to tidy up. Where do dreams come from?
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06-13-2009, 12:02 PM	#7928
ssrprotege Core Member [113%] MBTI: xxxx Join Date: Apr 2008 Posts: 4,541	From s*** (I mean, stuff that comes out via the rectum). Who made the pianoforte?
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06-13-2009, 12:12 PM	#7929
Stratego Veteran Member [57%] MBTI: InTJ Join Date: Mar 2009 Posts: 2,283	After the Visigoths sacked Rome in 500 AD, the new Emporer was determined to strengthen Rome's defenses against future barbarian attack. In 517 the first stone wall of the Pianoforte was completed, which means "those bastards are never going to get our goat again" in Italian. How does the telephone work?
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06-14-2009, 11:48 AM	#7930
Jonathan Brewer Core Member [135%] MBTI: xxxx Join Date: Feb 2009 Posts: 5,411	Ingeniously engineered electrodes coated with translucent peanut butter facilitate the transmission of human phonology. To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 15 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. What do hands, gloves, and the pentagon have in common?
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06-14-2009, 05:22 PM	#7931
BobbitSneazer Member [05%] MBTI: INTJ Join Date: Mar 2009 Posts: 237	The pentagon was built by people who had no hands but wore gloves on their feet.
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06-14-2009, 08:27 PM	#7932
Sequoia Core Member [142%] MBTI: INFJ Join Date: Aug 2008 Posts: 5,702	Who hid the question?
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06-14-2009, 08:48 PM	#7933
Synchronicity Core Member [366%] MBTI: INTJ Join Date: Apr 2009 Posts: 14,657	I did. It was offensively normal-sounding so I erased it from time. Why are they called apartments if they're always together?
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06-14-2009, 08:54 PM	#7934
Night Runner Core Member [148%] MBTI: INTJ Join Date: Mar 2009 Posts: 5,931	The word apartment actually means AP-art-ment, i.e. a unit of containment of art created by high school students in AP (advanced placement) classes. But then bureaucrats got their hands on it and we all know the rest... To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 15 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. Why are saxophones yellow?
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06-15-2009, 07:37 AM	#7935
Synapse Core Member [116%] MBTI: ENTJ Join Date: Dec 2008 Posts: 4,660	Because silver was too expensive and any other color would be too normal. Why do people believe in deities?
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06-15-2009, 07:52 AM	#7936
Stratego Veteran Member [57%] MBTI: InTJ Join Date: Mar 2009 Posts: 2,283	Because it makes prefect sense, of course. What's the cause of global warming?
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06-15-2009, 08:14 AM	#7937
Synapse Core Member [116%] MBTI: ENTJ Join Date: Dec 2008 Posts: 4,660	Because Bush got too cold and decided to turn up the temperature on the earth by making a coalition from the Taliban that garnered enough strength to turn up the thermostat on the back of the earth. How do you change a lightbulb?
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06-15-2009, 08:39 AM	#7938
Seriously Core Member [496%] MBTI: ISTP Join Date: Apr 2009 Posts: 19,878	Get a man to do it for you. Which came first the chicken or the egg?
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06-15-2009, 08:52 AM	#7939
Stratego Veteran Member [57%] MBTI: InTJ Join Date: Mar 2009 Posts: 2,283	They claim that it was at the same time, but that rarely happens. I think the Egg was faking it. Why don't we have universal health care?
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06-15-2009, 09:11 AM	#7940
MrWho100 Member [05%] MBTI: INTJ Join Date: Jun 2009 Posts: 214	Because the Xylopians in the Andromeda Galaxy refused to sign the treaty creating it, therefore making the whole thing null and void. Where did all the Dodos go?
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06-15-2009, 09:16 AM	#7941
Seriously Core Member [496%] MBTI: ISTP Join Date: Apr 2009 Posts: 19,878	Dodos were a staple food for unicorns. Unicorns are greedy beasts, ate the dodo's and then staved to death themselves. Serves them right really. What's at the bottom of wells?
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06-15-2009, 10:44 AM	#7942
Synapse Core Member [116%] MBTI: ENTJ Join Date: Dec 2008 Posts: 4,660	Bodies and fungus, along with unicorn horns. Why does a woodpecker attack trees?
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06-15-2009, 11:01 AM	#7943
Seriously Core Member [496%] MBTI: ISTP Join Date: Apr 2009 Posts: 19,878	It's not attacking the tree. It's making sweet sweet love to it. Over and over. Hence the term "love hurts" which was first coined by a tree. Why don't humans have pouches like kangaroos?
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06-15-2009, 12:15 PM	#7944
SelfInflected Member [15%] MBTI: IXTJ Join Date: Mar 2009 Posts: 634	Too hard to clean. Why do rats have hairless tails?
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06-15-2009, 03:11 PM	#7945
Jonathan Brewer Core Member [135%] MBTI: xxxx Join Date: Feb 2009 Posts: 5,411	Religious standards require them to shave their tails. What is the recipe for homemade cinnamon rolls?
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06-15-2009, 03:13 PM	#7946
Synchronicity Core Member [366%] MBTI: INTJ Join Date: Apr 2009 Posts: 14,657	Dump cinnamon and sugar into your gas tank and start the engine. Drive around the block twice, then idle in 3rd gear for 15 minutes or until golden brown. What creates the water pressure in our plumbing?
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06-15-2009, 03:30 PM	#7947
Jonathan Brewer Core Member [135%] MBTI: xxxx Join Date: Feb 2009 Posts: 5,411	The intense amounts of human gas that aren't flushed out during purification. What happens if you eat five pounds of chocolate in one sitting?
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06-15-2009, 04:57 PM	#7948
Stratego Veteran Member [57%] MBTI: InTJ Join Date: Mar 2009 Posts: 2,283	Your mouth will be tired but the chocolate will loovvve you. What happens if you don't scratch an itch?
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06-15-2009, 05:26 PM	#7949
Jonathan Brewer Core Member [135%] MBTI: xxxx Join Date: Feb 2009 Posts: 5,411	Spontaneous combustion. (I have this on good authority.) Where did Monte learn all his math? To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 15 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
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06-15-2009, 05:44 PM	#7950
Winston Member [03%] MBTI: INTJ Join Date: Jun 2009 Posts: 145	From his head. It is his math, after all. What do cats think about?
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