[Tarrick]

Well, in juxtaposition to the topic of compliments, how do you take to criticism?

For myself, when I was younger I was somewhat sensitive to it, though it depended on the subject matter. I managed to train myself to accept it and apply the changes, but sometimes it doesn't work that way.

So, am I the only one?

[Jezebel]

I'd love to say that I always take criticism well and use it productively. It's not always the case, but I don't think I'm oversensitive. At work, I'm used to it and it doesn't bother me.

It really depends on what's being criticized and how I already feel about it. I take it better when I already know there are problems with something and made myself receptive to it. If I disagree with the criticism I may become defensive. Funny thing is sometimes I'll argue with someone about something they suggest and still end up taking their advice after I've had more time to think it over.

[Opti]

I don't really listen to criticism or as they call it in my place of work 'Feedback'. I hear it at the time but don't take it onboard and forget about it 10 mins down the line. I'm not sure why I react to it that way, I think it sometimes depends on who the critic is, but in the effort to develop myself I am going to have to start listening to & analysing my feedback.

[Selly]

Sometimes I take criticism personally, and I used to a lot when I was little, but now it just sort of rolls off most of the time. I think I'm developing a bad habit of dismissing other people's criticism if I honestly can't see where they're coming from. I try to give it a fair chance, and think about both sides of the issue, but I can't always see the validity of their opinion and then promptly dismiss it.

[Evalis]

Interesting enough, I value and encourage critism of myself. Indeed I criticize myself all the time. The only circumstance in which I do not care to recieve critism is when it is regarding my work ethic - which I consider impeccable. Everything else is fair game - but then, I also like to argue, so make sure you have your facts straight before saying anything if you don't want to get caught up in it!

[Tarrick]

Originally Posted by Evalis

Interesting enough, I value and encourage critism of myself. Indeed I criticize myself all the time. The only circumstance in which I do not care to recieve critism is when it is regarding my work ethic - which I consider impeccable. Everything else is fair game - but then, I also like to argue, so make sure you have your facts straight before saying anything if you don't want to get caught up in it!

I criticize myself all the time too. But it's very odd for me to receive criticism when I don't perceive me needed it for a particular incident (like me being yelled for something that I was never told). I sometimes catch myself ignoring it because I don't believe that they are in a position to criticize me for that when they don't know what they're talking about.

I'm also sometimes weired out when I'm criticizing myself for something and I get complimented for that same thing. Anyone else ever have that happen?

[Apococlock]

Mmm, fun topic.

Back in the day I took criticism rather poorly, or in other words like most other people I made excuses to try to cover myself. This isn't so much the case anymore now that I actually encourage criticism rather than run from it.

Criticism is a great thing, it allows us to see issues with ourselves that we may not have known about. It's a kind of, "Hey look, you can improve upon this!"

Why not take that and use it?

Sometime it's hard to take something that I don't want to admit, which is difficult for anyone I'm sure.

[Guido]

I used to take it badly as a kid I think. I'm not bad with it now, but it still kind of bothers me. With the amount of personal criticism I apply, having someone else say 'you did this wrong' is more likely to result in me explaining to them how I actually thought it through. I'll accept the criticism if I actually missed something, for sure. But for someone to tell me 'you did this wrong' when I actually thought through their criticism, will annoy me. I see that more as them stating 'I don't believe your thinking structure is working properly' aka 'you're a retard.'

This is usually alleviated with the simple fact that if they can't see I didn't think it through, then they're the retard. I generally find most people's criticism to be void of thought, so I tend to be pretty apathetic when someone is criticizing for the sake of criticizing. This can tend to have them wondering why I didn’t worship their generous gem of feedback they so graciously offered. I work with some dumb coworkers... what can I say.

On the contrary, if someone I intellectually respect criticizes me I will genuinely and thoroughly think through what they had to say.

[Rei]

Let's just say I try very hard to sound/act like it didn't just completely shoot down my pride *:D

I don't mind criticism. * It hurts my pride, but I think it's definately necessary. *It'd worse if I didn't know what my faults were and continued to be an dolt. *INTJ's are self critical anyway, I say it helps when you get criticism from others, you improve faster (effeciency *:
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).

It does get frustrating though, how sometimes I take it too much to heart (because I am self critical), and I start to think about these criticisms actively at random times of day/month/year.

[The Rose]

	Originally Posted by Selly
	... I think I'm developing a bad habit of dismissing other people's criticism if I honestly can't see where they're coming from. I try to give it a fair chance, and think about both sides of the issue, but I can't always see the validity of their opinion and then promptly dismiss it.

From what I have read, this sounds like a typical INTJ response.
INTJs go through a lot of trouble to arrive at their conclusions and they will not be easily swayed from what they believe to be a correct course of action.

[The Rose]

	Originally Posted by Tarrick
	Well, in juxtaposition to the topic of compliments, how do you take to criticism? For myself, when I was younger I was somewhat sensitive to it, though it depended on the subject matter. I managed to train myself to accept it and apply the changes, but sometimes it doesn't work that way. So, am I the only one?

I was rejected a lot as a child, so any kind of criticism felt like rejection
and I would retreat from people who criticized me - because it hurt too deeply.
It has taken a long time to learn that criticism is not rejection.
Only in the last couple of years have I learned that I am entitled to an opinion
and that just because someone shouts me down, it doesn't mean I'm wrong.

[Firelie]

I tend to take criticism, and then replay all of the things I did wrong in my head for the next few hours (maybe even the rest of the day) trying to decide how to never make the mistake again.

[Guido]

That's true for me only if I realize it's a mistake. If not, I'll usually promptly dismiss it at the time, but if there was anything to the criticism, I'll often replay it in my head for a long time until I sorted it out. It has happened on occasion (VERY rarely
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) that I realized I can actually use criticism that I had quickly dismissed.

[Tarrick]

	Originally Posted by Rei
	Let's just say I try very hard to sound/act like it didn't just completely shoot down my pride :D

Pride is always injured here, I think. But I never really notice unless I really screwed up. If was simply wrong then I don't care, probably because of my absolute need to be correct. It's not that I try and force the situation to be so that my opinion is right, quite the opposite. I refuse to hold a opinion that I even suspect may be wrong unless I've throughly investigated it. Being correct should matter more then right.

[Guido]

	Originally Posted by Tarrick
	Being correct should matter more then right.

Couldn't have worded it better.

[Lufus]

I love criticism, but for some reason people are often reluctant to give it to me, like they think they'll hurt my feelings or something. Today I asked a girl I know fairly well if she thought I was arrogant; she wouldn't give me a straight-forward answer, kinda pissed me off. Got off topic for a second, I want people to tell me I'm wrong, so long as they don't mind me arguing with their criticism. If they have a sound base to the criticism, I would love to hear it and apply it to myself.

[Guido]

That's the good kind, and it's always welcome. I usually don't get that either. The kind of criticism I often get (at work for example) is someone criticizing me for the sake of criticizing me. By using the logic "there's always room for improvement" they can tell me that I'm not doing as good of job as I could; criticizing for the sake of criticizing. If they had anything tangible other than a catch phrase, maybe I'd listen to them. But to give me a 3/4 for work ethic at some kind of performance review without having *anything* negative to say about how I work other than something based on that catch phrase is annoying, especially since I often find myself twice as productive as some of my coworkers. And there's no way those coworkers get 1.5/4 :/

I have no idea why people have such a hard time with this. I'm either doing a perfect job in their eyes, or there's something I'm doing wrong or something I could be doing better.

[Rei]

Originally Posted by Tarrick

Originally Posted by Rei Let's just say I try very hard to sound/act like it didn't just completely shoot down my pride *:D Pride is always injured here, I think. But I never really notice unless I really screwed up. If was simply wrong then I don't care, probably because of my absolute need to be correct. It's not that I try and force the situation to be so that my opinion is right, quite the opposite. I refuse to hold a opinion that I even suspect may be wrong unless I've throughly investigated it. Being correct should matter more then right.

For some reason I completely forgot that I'd posted here.

But anyway, good point. I dislike being wrong, so whenever someone proposes that I'm mistaken... and I agree with them, I scramble to find out how the heck that happened (WTH?! I'M WRONG?!)

For me, any mistake is a screw up, is a screw up, is a screw up... It doesn't matter how big a screw up it is, I still feel it stabbing my pride.

[wolf]

	Originally Posted by Rei
	For me, any mistake is a screw up, is a screw up, is a screw up... It doesn't matter how big a screw up it is, I still feel it stabbing my pride.

Do you like knowing, or is it better to be blissfully unaware?

More importantly: Am I on your bad list for correcting you?

[bikerscars]

it depends from whom the criticism is coming...

is it someone i respect; is it accurate

[Mark]

I take critisism pretty well. I often times take it even better if it is offered constructivly and is given alongside some suggestions.

something that we pretty funny though, was last night my wife and I were talking about INTJ sarcasm, and she said, "INTJ sarcasm is not just legendary, it's infamous"

I took that with a proud smile :-D

[rwyatt365]

I like the concept of criticism, but I hate being criticized (if that makes any sense). Whenever someone starts with, "you haven't done this, you need to do that", I start feeling offended and become defensive. Most times that happens before I recognize what is occurring and by then it's too late. In my mind criticism starts sounding like "I'm right and you're wrong", then the shields go up and nothing else gets in.

I guess living life as an outsider has made me very conscious and protective of my "uniqueness". Inside of me I feel that if people would stop trying to change me, and recognize my value they would understand that making me "different" would be to all of our detriment. Criticism is just a subtle way of saying, "You're not the way you are supposed to be, so change".

[Zard Lucifer]

I used to. But now it depends on the person, if it comes fomr someone I respect I try to see what might be wrong or what might be right regarding the comment and try to improve on things. If its from the general public, I basically disregard it. If its from my rival or someone who dislikes me, I take their opinions and try to analyze which were said out of envy, praise and jealousy, and then I work on those.

I do all this while trying to keep to my principles and philosophies.

[hopscotch]

If there is some basis for the criticism (i.e. the person can show or tell me exactly what I did wrong and why) I can accept it and incorporate it into my life. If the person is just making up problems to pass the time or deflect criticism from him/herself, I get annoyed and ignore them.

I tend to take criticism better when it comes from someone I regard as competent and efficient, and when they offer advice on how to make changes.

[v1cious]

i encourage criticism from people that i respect (usually *NT*, or someone close to me), or if it is constructive and not there to attempt to belittle me (and it's usually not hard to tell when this is so).