Guilt

**brdmadgrl82** · 01-08-2010, 10:39 AM

I was talking to my brother last night and somehow he managed to open up about some things (normally he doesn't talk about his feelings :P ). He actually admitted to feeling guilty about his past relationships, girls he cheated on, people he hurt. He seems to be dealing with this now and trying to work it out in his head. I couldn't really offer good advice on this. Though I myself can relate to feeling guilt. In my teen years I was not a good friend to many people and I am sure I hurt a few myself. It did take me awhile to realize I hurt them and even though I no longer have contact with them I still feel I can move on by learning from the experience.

Share your stories.

How do you let go of the past in terms of guilt especially if you no longer keep in touch with the person you hurt...How did you move on?

**plotthickens** · 01-08-2010, 10:42 AM

Made amends if the transgression was bad enough.

In most cases: learned and moved on.

**hubcap** · 01-08-2010, 01:42 PM

It is not beneficial to carry guilt around with you. It needs to be shed as quickly as possible or it will drag you down. If I offend someone I apologize immediately and with no regrets. Having a conscience is a good thing as it provides us guidance. Feeling sorry for bad personal conduct is also a good thing in my opinion for it helps us to prevent the behavior from recurring, but don't let the guilt drag you down.

**sunlover** · 01-08-2010, 04:44 PM

I agree with the posts previous. I agree with the philosophy that mistakes happen, repeating them, well......

**crow** · 01-08-2010, 04:57 PM

What you were is not what you are now.

If it is, then fine: feel guilty.
If you have learned from your mistakes, fine: let them go.

**Monte314** · 01-08-2010, 07:22 PM

Perhaps "guilt" serves some purpose. If so, shedding it before its work is complete, or holding on to it afterwards would both be mistakes.

01-08-2010, 10:39 AM	#1
brdmadgrl82 Member [12%] MBTI: INTJ Join Date: Sep 2009 Posts: 512	I was talking to my brother last night and somehow he managed to open up about some things (normally he doesn't talk about his feelings :P ). He actually admitted to feeling guilty about his past relationships, girls he cheated on, people he hurt. He seems to be dealing with this now and trying to work it out in his head. I couldn't really offer good advice on this. Though I myself can relate to feeling guilt. In my teen years I was not a good friend to many people and I am sure I hurt a few myself. It did take me awhile to realize I hurt them and even though I no longer have contact with them I still feel I can move on by learning from the experience. Share your stories. How do you let go of the past in terms of guilt especially if you no longer keep in touch with the person you hurt...How did you move on?
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01-08-2010, 10:42 AM	#2
plotthickens Core Member [662%] MBTI: INTJ Join Date: Nov 2009 Posts: 26,483	Made amends if the transgression was bad enough. In most cases: learned and moved on.
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01-08-2010, 01:42 PM	#3
hubcap Veteran Member [73%] MBTI: ENTJ Join Date: Sep 2009 Posts: 2,920	It is not beneficial to carry guilt around with you. It needs to be shed as quickly as possible or it will drag you down. If I offend someone I apologize immediately and with no regrets. Having a conscience is a good thing as it provides us guidance. Feeling sorry for bad personal conduct is also a good thing in my opinion for it helps us to prevent the behavior from recurring, but don't let the guilt drag you down.
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01-08-2010, 04:44 PM	#4
sunlover Member [23%] MBTI: INTJ Join Date: Mar 2009 Posts: 955	I agree with the posts previous. I agree with the philosophy that mistakes happen, repeating them, well......
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01-08-2010, 04:57 PM	#5
crow Member [05%] MBTI: INxJ Join Date: Jan 2010 Posts: 223	What you were is not what you are now. If it is, then fine: feel guilty. If you have learned from your mistakes, fine: let them go.
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01-08-2010, 07:22 PM	#6
Monte314 Core Member [407%] MBTI: INTJ Join Date: Apr 2008 Posts: 16,307	Perhaps "guilt" serves some purpose. If so, shedding it before its work is complete, or holding on to it afterwards would both be mistakes.
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