corrupt a wish - Page 598

**n8ey** · 06-23-2012, 12:33 AM

Granted - people now get shit done, and you have nothing to do.

Celebrating, you have fun for a few weeks, but everyone else interrupts you in your business to show a more efficient way.

Eventually, they guide you, forcefully, to shoot yourself as the most efficient way of dealing with your inefficiency.

With a blindfold and a squad.

I wish I didn't have to work so hard to have a good time.

**zeroemission** · 06-23-2012, 01:57 AM

granted: now you're a laboratory endorphin tester

i wish life were simple

**Faux hawk** · 06-23-2012, 02:42 AM

Granted. All you need is more love, but now every pain that affects humanity is perceived.

I wish I had more light.

**zeroemission** · 06-23-2012, 03:14 AM

granted: wrong time to stare at a solar eclipse

i wish i knew WTF i'm doing

**DeepThought** · 06-23-2012, 10:14 AM

Granted, but in a moment of distraction brought about by this sudden revelation of knowledge you forgot to look where you are going and stub your toe quite painfully.

I wish the firewall would just fix its fucking self.

**zeroemission** · 06-23-2012, 12:29 PM

granted: computer heal thyself... now you've lowered your immuno-response and are virus proone

i hope i don't take this wish for granted

**gracious** · 06-23-2012, 01:35 PM

Granted. This wish is special. You obsess about it and it takes over your every thought. You get 5 jobs to be able to buy it nice things and you compliment its every tiny achievement. Then you walk in on it screwing the mailman.

I wish the mailman still stopped by my house.

**zeroemission** · 06-23-2012, 01:55 PM

granted: it's mr speedy mc feely and he's a 3 second brother

i wish people actually listened to what i say instead of what they want to hear

**QuantumEnigma** · 06-23-2012, 08:00 PM

Granted. They listen but still disregard.

I wish that there was intelligent, non-hostile life on another planet.

**zeroemission** · 06-23-2012, 08:19 PM

granted... i'm sure there is... it's a big effing universe (YOU WIN! YAY!)

i wish there was intelligent universally non-hostile life on THIS planet

**Zhen** · 06-23-2012, 10:32 PM

Granted. There is you just lack the capabilities to be able to a)identify them and b) communicate with them. pobrecito!

I wish the aliens would just take over already.

**zeroemission** · 06-24-2012, 12:41 AM

granted: now you get deported to omicron ceti for not having a green card

i wish it were that easy

**silvercrystal07** · 06-24-2012, 09:51 AM

Granted. It is that easy, for you to fail at everything you do.

I wish bones were unbreakable.

**zeroemission** · 06-24-2012, 11:41 AM

granted: now everything else is, but on the upside, that diet is finally starting to work for you

i wish i wasn't so easily corrupted at times

**silvercrystal07** · 06-24-2012, 12:41 PM

Granted. You are not easily corrupted at very specific times, such as the past and when you're asleep. But that's it.

I wish I was a better dancer.

**jkatra** · 06-24-2012, 12:42 PM

Granted. You're a strip club dancer.

I wish it was easier to get a new passport.

**silvercrystal07** · 06-24-2012, 12:44 PM

Granted. It's much easier now. For everyone but you.

I wish life was a walk in the park.

**zeroemission** · 06-24-2012, 12:48 PM

GRANTED: life is now a walk through Central Park at 3:00 a.m. pacific standard time

i wish i didn't have to keep wishing

**MikeAZ** · 06-24-2012, 03:31 PM

Granted, you are banned from this thread (try the banned thread)?

I wish I knew my whole family

**zeroemission** · 06-24-2012, 08:26 PM

GRANTED: welcome to the human race bro

i wish people used logic at least occasionally

**DeepThought** · 06-25-2012, 12:14 PM

Granted. You now find that as you interact with strangers, like the teller at the bank or the sandwich "artist" who made your lunch, they randomly start slobbering and crying while mumbling about the meaningless of it all. In a one week time period you've personally witnessed three attempted suicides and one person drive their car straight into a bridge pylon on your way to work.

I wish for fewer aches and pains.

**Faux hawk** · 06-25-2012, 02:15 PM

Granted, but now you feel nothing.

I wish, I felt nothing.

**wrongjargon** · 06-25-2012, 03:18 PM

Granted. You are a zombie.

I wish I had more time to do everything I want to do.

**zeroemission** · 06-25-2012, 03:23 PM

GRANTED: now you're intraveneously fed in front of your video game

i wish people would just say whatever they have to instead of drop hints and innuendos

**Faux hawk** · 06-25-2012, 03:25 PM

Granted, but now you don't want to talk to anyone ever again.

I wish I didn't have to make phone calls.

06-23-2012, 12:33 AM	#14926
n8ey Veteran Member [56%] MBTI: INTJ Join Date: Feb 2011 Posts: 2,274	Granted - people now get shit done, and you have nothing to do. Celebrating, you have fun for a few weeks, but everyone else interrupts you in your business to show a more efficient way. Eventually, they guide you, forcefully, to shoot yourself as the most efficient way of dealing with your inefficiency. With a blindfold and a squad. I wish I didn't have to work so hard to have a good time.
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06-23-2012, 01:57 AM	#14927
zeroemission Core Member [128%] MBTI: intj Join Date: Feb 2012 Posts: 5,136	granted: now you're a laboratory endorphin tester i wish life were simple
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06-23-2012, 02:42 AM	#14928
Faux hawk Banned MBTI: XXXX Join Date: Jun 2012 Posts: 2,542	Granted. All you need is more love, but now every pain that affects humanity is perceived. I wish I had more light.
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06-23-2012, 03:14 AM	#14929
zeroemission Core Member [128%] MBTI: intj Join Date: Feb 2012 Posts: 5,136	granted: wrong time to stare at a solar eclipse i wish i knew WTF i'm doing
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06-23-2012, 10:14 AM	#14930
DeepThought Core Member [254%] MBTI: INTJ Join Date: Mar 2011 Posts: 10,183	Granted, but in a moment of distraction brought about by this sudden revelation of knowledge you forgot to look where you are going and stub your toe quite painfully. I wish the firewall would just fix its fucking self.
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06-23-2012, 12:29 PM	#14931
zeroemission Core Member [128%] MBTI: intj Join Date: Feb 2012 Posts: 5,136	granted: computer heal thyself... now you've lowered your immuno-response and are virus proone i hope i don't take this wish for granted
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06-23-2012, 01:35 PM	#14932
gracious Core Member [342%] MBTI: INFJ Join Date: Mar 2011 Posts: 13,693	Granted. This wish is special. You obsess about it and it takes over your every thought. You get 5 jobs to be able to buy it nice things and you compliment its every tiny achievement. Then you walk in on it screwing the mailman. I wish the mailman still stopped by my house.
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06-23-2012, 01:55 PM	#14933
zeroemission Core Member [128%] MBTI: intj Join Date: Feb 2012 Posts: 5,136	granted: it's mr speedy mc feely and he's a 3 second brother i wish people actually listened to what i say instead of what they want to hear
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06-23-2012, 08:00 PM	#14934
QuantumEnigma Member [12%] MBTI: INTJ Join Date: Mar 2012 Posts: 487	Granted. They listen but still disregard. I wish that there was intelligent, non-hostile life on another planet.
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06-23-2012, 08:19 PM	#14935
zeroemission Core Member [128%] MBTI: intj Join Date: Feb 2012 Posts: 5,136	granted... i'm sure there is... it's a big effing universe (YOU WIN! YAY!) i wish there was intelligent universally non-hostile life on THIS planet
zeroemission is offline post a comment

06-23-2012, 10:32 PM	#14936
Zhen Veteran Member [66%] MBTI: INfp Join Date: Nov 2008 Posts: 2,642	Granted. There is you just lack the capabilities to be able to a)identify them and b) communicate with them. pobrecito! I wish the aliens would just take over already.
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06-24-2012, 12:41 AM	#14937
zeroemission Core Member [128%] MBTI: intj Join Date: Feb 2012 Posts: 5,136	granted: now you get deported to omicron ceti for not having a green card i wish it were that easy
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06-24-2012, 09:51 AM	#14938
silvercrystal07 Member [22%] MBTI: INTJ Join Date: Jul 2010 Posts: 897	Granted. It is that easy, for you to fail at everything you do. I wish bones were unbreakable.
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06-24-2012, 11:41 AM	#14939
zeroemission Core Member [128%] MBTI: intj Join Date: Feb 2012 Posts: 5,136	granted: now everything else is, but on the upside, that diet is finally starting to work for you i wish i wasn't so easily corrupted at times
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06-24-2012, 12:41 PM	#14940
silvercrystal07 Member [22%] MBTI: INTJ Join Date: Jul 2010 Posts: 897	Granted. You are not easily corrupted at very specific times, such as the past and when you're asleep. But that's it. I wish I was a better dancer.
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06-24-2012, 12:42 PM	#14941
jkatra Core Member [723%] MBTI: INTJ Join Date: Jan 2009 Posts: 28,944	Granted. You're a strip club dancer. I wish it was easier to get a new passport.
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06-24-2012, 12:44 PM	#14942
silvercrystal07 Member [22%] MBTI: INTJ Join Date: Jul 2010 Posts: 897	Granted. It's much easier now. For everyone but you. I wish life was a walk in the park.
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06-24-2012, 12:48 PM	#14943
zeroemission Core Member [128%] MBTI: intj Join Date: Feb 2012 Posts: 5,136	GRANTED: life is now a walk through Central Park at 3:00 a.m. pacific standard time i wish i didn't have to keep wishing
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06-24-2012, 03:31 PM	#14944
MikeAZ Member [27%] MBTI: INtJ Join Date: Jul 2009 Posts: 1,112	Granted, you are banned from this thread (try the banned thread)? I wish I knew my whole family
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06-24-2012, 08:26 PM	#14945
zeroemission Core Member [128%] MBTI: intj Join Date: Feb 2012 Posts: 5,136	GRANTED: welcome to the human race bro i wish people used logic at least occasionally
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06-25-2012, 12:14 PM	#14946
DeepThought Core Member [254%] MBTI: INTJ Join Date: Mar 2011 Posts: 10,183	Granted. You now find that as you interact with strangers, like the teller at the bank or the sandwich "artist" who made your lunch, they randomly start slobbering and crying while mumbling about the meaningless of it all. In a one week time period you've personally witnessed three attempted suicides and one person drive their car straight into a bridge pylon on your way to work. I wish for fewer aches and pains.
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06-25-2012, 02:15 PM	#14947
Faux hawk Banned MBTI: XXXX Join Date: Jun 2012 Posts: 2,542	Granted, but now you feel nothing. I wish, I felt nothing.
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06-25-2012, 03:18 PM	#14948
wrongjargon Member [12%] MBTI: INTJ Join Date: Jan 2011 Posts: 502	Granted. You are a zombie. I wish I had more time to do everything I want to do.
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06-25-2012, 03:23 PM	#14949
zeroemission Core Member [128%] MBTI: intj Join Date: Feb 2012 Posts: 5,136	GRANTED: now you're intraveneously fed in front of your video game i wish people would just say whatever they have to instead of drop hints and innuendos
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06-25-2012, 03:25 PM	#14950
Faux hawk Banned MBTI: XXXX Join Date: Jun 2012 Posts: 2,542	Granted, but now you don't want to talk to anyone ever again. I wish I didn't have to make phone calls.
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