corrupt a wish - Page 231

**jonnyb** · 12-13-2009, 10:09 PM

Granted! Everyone loves the presents you made. So much so that they refuse to take them and deprive you.

I wish beer would magically float from out of my fridge and into my hand when I wanted one....oh and with the bottle cap off too.

**Synapse** · 12-14-2009, 12:41 PM

Granted. Now when you get home from work and walk into the kitchen, beer bottles shoot out of the fridge and crash into your hand, shattering the glass and dousing you in beer. Probably should have specified the speed at which they were coming to you...

I wish that I could cut down trees merely by looking at them.

**jonnyb** · 12-14-2009, 02:53 PM

Granted! I can use you to take care of a few around here. Unfortunately, you have no control over this new found power. For some bizzare turn of events, someone who doesn't like you airlifts you to the middle of Sequoia National Park and drops you there. It will be interesting if you make it out of there without getting squished by all the falling trees.

I wish I had a toothpick to get this apple skin out from between my teeth.

**realJim** · 12-14-2009, 05:27 PM

Granted! One of Synapse's giant sequoia trees appears in your living room, knocking a beer out of your hand, lodges in your mouth, and displaces the apple skin from your teeth. The guinness world records book will have a 'largest toothpick' entry this year.

I wish nothing eventful happens when I go to the basement to get another Anchor Steam Porter.

**Synchronicity** · 12-14-2009, 07:40 PM

Granted. No events occur. You do not go to the basement, you do not get the porter. Oh well, maybe next time.

I wish I had some good beer to drink.

**Synapse** · 12-14-2009, 07:46 PM

Granted, you get the best beer in the world.

It happens to come from a far-off European country where the inhabitants don't speak English, however, so a "case of good beer" to them got mistranslated into "child porn with cats" and was promptly shipped to your house. Sorry for the inconvenience.

I wish I could coerce anyone to talk with me at any time I wanted.

**Kisai** · 12-15-2009, 12:03 AM

Wish granted: People talk to you whenever you want...and talk...and talk... and don't stop talking when you use your power to make someone else talk to you. It quickly becomes impossible to talk or hear anything in the din.

I wish I could change my gender with a snap of my fingers.

**Synapse** · 12-15-2009, 05:39 AM

Granted, but now you are possessed by an uncontrollable impulse to snap your fingers to Cannibal Corpse (which is incredibly fast music) and so you rapidly change gender.

I wish I could control the rotation of the earth via a control in my house.

**Necrosis** · 12-15-2009, 06:36 AM

Granted. You drop the remote into the toilet and the earth spins violently forever.

I wish I had a corner office.

**hutbug** · 12-15-2009, 11:23 AM

Granted. No curtains, so you broil to death the first day.

I wish I worked part-time but still made the same $$.

**Synapse** · 12-15-2009, 11:36 AM

Granted, you actually die of boredom as you don't know what to do after you are done working, you have nothing to fill that time with. Congratulations on making yourself useful to science as the first one to die from such a thing.

I wish I posssessed the ability to locate water for people.

**Necrosis** · 12-15-2009, 11:46 AM

Granted. Everyone asks you for water at the same time. A surge of water magically appears in front of you as that's the only way you can locate it. You drown to death.

I wish I had infinite cool-aid.

**Synapse** · 12-15-2009, 11:54 AM

Granted. It conveniently goes into your refrigerator at an alarmingly fast rate which puts tremendous pressure on the fridge and when you open it you are buried to death under the hundreds of heavy bottles of Kool-Aid bursting out.

I wish I could wear summer clothing when I'm going outside in winter and not be cold/freeze to death.

**Kisai** · 12-15-2009, 12:37 PM

Granted. You wear summer clothing freely. Your local community is disgusted at your nonconformity and word goes out that you are a witch. An Inquisitor is convened and you are Inquired at length with hot piano wire and a hunchback named Grigor.

I wish I had my own television show with fantastic ratings, like George Lopez.

**socal** · 12-15-2009, 03:30 PM

Granted! Unfortunately in January, American Idol is slotted against your spot and your ratings start to flounder. In addition, you start making headlines as a result of a sex scandal involving sheep, women's lingerie, and three interns on your show, and your show is cancelled by March.

I wish I could automatically smile more and appear more likable.

**realJim** · 12-15-2009, 05:49 PM

Granted! You resemble a rear window bobble head, smiling and bobbing. You appear likable, but the sincerity is missing. Maybe it's the thought bubble you have, "Your skin will make a nice poncho.", hummm... not so nice.

I wish I could design the perfect tent and sell a million copies.

**jonnyb** · 12-15-2009, 06:32 PM

Granted! Awesome tent. Millions of copies sold throughout the world. Unfortunately your contracted manufacturer overlooked an important detail and all the tents have a tendancy to leak water, enven on sunny days. Too bad you must now recall them all.

My friends wish as he is sitting here....I wish to have the ability to succesfully seduce any woman in the world.

**realJim** · 12-15-2009, 06:38 PM

Granted! As your ability to seduce women grows, your *ahem* manhood shrinks. I think baby dick is the proper term. Fortunately your seduction ability makes them feel rapture at your lovemaking, only you feel empty at the end.

I wish I had optimum water pressure in my house, if someone is in the shower no one else can use water or the person is left cold.

**Synapse** · 12-15-2009, 06:59 PM

Granted. To get optimal water pressure, you end up taking water from everyone else on your street. Infuriated at you, a mob forms outside your house and they burn your house down.

I wish I had a glass knife for decoration.

**realJim** · 12-18-2009, 08:25 PM

Granted! Your ornate glass knife makes it way into your life at the next garage sale you stop for. Good price and a beautiful knife. So sharp. So beautiful. So heavy. Someday it's going to fall off of it's show place and sever the thumb of someone you love. Should you get rid of it or wait in anxious anticipation to see if this wish really was corrupt?

I wish liquor stores stayed open past 10:30 on a friday night!

**hutbug** · 12-18-2009, 08:31 PM

Granted. You make your way at 1 am to your friendly local bevmo, and as you approach the entrance clutching your hardearned cash, the gang inside that's robbing the place sees you, takes your dough and shoots you for good measure. News at 6.

I wish our politicians were all good people and not corruptible.

**jonnyb** · 12-18-2009, 09:25 PM

Granted! You then woke up like your...., um, avatar, all wet.

I wish hutbug an towel.

**hutbug** · 12-18-2009, 09:27 PM

Granted. Turns out she doesn't need it, it's just pomade!

I wish Jonny a pair of cotton pants.

**realJim** · 12-18-2009, 09:29 PM

Granted! Too bad it's the cotton pants you're wearing. Now you are both doomed to walk around like Siamese twins for all eternity.

Our snow prediction is for 6 to 12 inches tomorrow. I wish we get 25 inches.

**jonnyb** · 12-18-2009, 09:52 PM

Granted! 25 inches. But, you didn't speecify in that sentence the noun. You get 25" of flamming gorilla shit to muck through.

I wish for X-mas would go away!

12-13-2009, 10:09 PM	#5751
jonnyb Core Member [462%] MBTI: INTJ Join Date: Jul 2009 Posts: 18,513	Granted! Everyone loves the presents you made. So much so that they refuse to take them and deprive you. I wish beer would magically float from out of my fridge and into my hand when I wanted one....oh and with the bottle cap off too.
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12-14-2009, 12:41 PM	#5752
Synapse Core Member [116%] MBTI: ENTJ Join Date: Dec 2008 Posts: 4,660	Granted. Now when you get home from work and walk into the kitchen, beer bottles shoot out of the fridge and crash into your hand, shattering the glass and dousing you in beer. Probably should have specified the speed at which they were coming to you... I wish that I could cut down trees merely by looking at them.
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12-14-2009, 02:53 PM	#5753
jonnyb Core Member [462%] MBTI: INTJ Join Date: Jul 2009 Posts: 18,513	Granted! I can use you to take care of a few around here. Unfortunately, you have no control over this new found power. For some bizzare turn of events, someone who doesn't like you airlifts you to the middle of Sequoia National Park and drops you there. It will be interesting if you make it out of there without getting squished by all the falling trees. I wish I had a toothpick to get this apple skin out from between my teeth.
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12-14-2009, 05:27 PM	#5754
realJim Member [37%] MBTI: INTJ Join Date: Jun 2009 Posts: 1,488	Granted! One of Synapse's giant sequoia trees appears in your living room, knocking a beer out of your hand, lodges in your mouth, and displaces the apple skin from your teeth. The guinness world records book will have a 'largest toothpick' entry this year. I wish nothing eventful happens when I go to the basement to get another Anchor Steam Porter.
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12-14-2009, 07:40 PM	#5755
Synchronicity Core Member [366%] MBTI: INTJ Join Date: Apr 2009 Posts: 14,657	Granted. No events occur. You do not go to the basement, you do not get the porter. Oh well, maybe next time. I wish I had some good beer to drink.
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12-14-2009, 07:46 PM	#5756
Synapse Core Member [116%] MBTI: ENTJ Join Date: Dec 2008 Posts: 4,660	Granted, you get the best beer in the world. It happens to come from a far-off European country where the inhabitants don't speak English, however, so a "case of good beer" to them got mistranslated into "child porn with cats" and was promptly shipped to your house. Sorry for the inconvenience. I wish I could coerce anyone to talk with me at any time I wanted.
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12-15-2009, 12:03 AM	#5757
Kisai Core Member [354%] MBTI: XXXX Join Date: May 2008 Posts: 14,166	Wish granted: People talk to you whenever you want...and talk...and talk... and don't stop talking when you use your power to make someone else talk to you. It quickly becomes impossible to talk or hear anything in the din. I wish I could change my gender with a snap of my fingers.
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12-15-2009, 05:39 AM	#5758
Synapse Core Member [116%] MBTI: ENTJ Join Date: Dec 2008 Posts: 4,660	Granted, but now you are possessed by an uncontrollable impulse to snap your fingers to Cannibal Corpse (which is incredibly fast music) and so you rapidly change gender. I wish I could control the rotation of the earth via a control in my house.
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12-15-2009, 06:36 AM	#5759
Necrosis Core Member [102%] MBTI: INTJ Join Date: Feb 2008 Posts: 4,113	Granted. You drop the remote into the toilet and the earth spins violently forever. I wish I had a corner office.
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12-15-2009, 11:23 AM	#5760
hutbug Core Member [101%] MBTI: INTJ Join Date: Sep 2009 Posts: 4,072	Granted. No curtains, so you broil to death the first day. I wish I worked part-time but still made the same $$.
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12-15-2009, 11:36 AM	#5761
Synapse Core Member [116%] MBTI: ENTJ Join Date: Dec 2008 Posts: 4,660	Granted, you actually die of boredom as you don't know what to do after you are done working, you have nothing to fill that time with. Congratulations on making yourself useful to science as the first one to die from such a thing. I wish I posssessed the ability to locate water for people.
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12-15-2009, 11:46 AM	#5762
Necrosis Core Member [102%] MBTI: INTJ Join Date: Feb 2008 Posts: 4,113	Granted. Everyone asks you for water at the same time. A surge of water magically appears in front of you as that's the only way you can locate it. You drown to death. I wish I had infinite cool-aid.
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12-15-2009, 11:54 AM	#5763
Synapse Core Member [116%] MBTI: ENTJ Join Date: Dec 2008 Posts: 4,660	Granted. It conveniently goes into your refrigerator at an alarmingly fast rate which puts tremendous pressure on the fridge and when you open it you are buried to death under the hundreds of heavy bottles of Kool-Aid bursting out. I wish I could wear summer clothing when I'm going outside in winter and not be cold/freeze to death.
Synapse is offline post a comment

12-15-2009, 12:37 PM	#5764
Kisai Core Member [354%] MBTI: XXXX Join Date: May 2008 Posts: 14,166	Granted. You wear summer clothing freely. Your local community is disgusted at your nonconformity and word goes out that you are a witch. An Inquisitor is convened and you are Inquired at length with hot piano wire and a hunchback named Grigor. I wish I had my own television show with fantastic ratings, like George Lopez.
Kisai is offline post a comment

12-15-2009, 03:30 PM	#5765
socal New Member [01%] MBTI: INTJ Join Date: Dec 2009 Posts: 28	Granted! Unfortunately in January, American Idol is slotted against your spot and your ratings start to flounder. In addition, you start making headlines as a result of a sex scandal involving sheep, women's lingerie, and three interns on your show, and your show is cancelled by March. I wish I could automatically smile more and appear more likable.
socal is offline post a comment

12-15-2009, 05:49 PM	#5766
realJim Member [37%] MBTI: INTJ Join Date: Jun 2009 Posts: 1,488	Granted! You resemble a rear window bobble head, smiling and bobbing. You appear likable, but the sincerity is missing. Maybe it's the thought bubble you have, "Your skin will make a nice poncho.", hummm... not so nice. I wish I could design the perfect tent and sell a million copies.
realJim is offline post a comment

12-15-2009, 06:32 PM	#5767
jonnyb Core Member [462%] MBTI: INTJ Join Date: Jul 2009 Posts: 18,513	Granted! Awesome tent. Millions of copies sold throughout the world. Unfortunately your contracted manufacturer overlooked an important detail and all the tents have a tendancy to leak water, enven on sunny days. Too bad you must now recall them all. My friends wish as he is sitting here....I wish to have the ability to succesfully seduce any woman in the world.
jonnyb is offline post a comment

12-15-2009, 06:38 PM	#5768
realJim Member [37%] MBTI: INTJ Join Date: Jun 2009 Posts: 1,488	Granted! As your ability to seduce women grows, your ahem manhood shrinks. I think baby dick is the proper term. Fortunately your seduction ability makes them feel rapture at your lovemaking, only you feel empty at the end. I wish I had optimum water pressure in my house, if someone is in the shower no one else can use water or the person is left cold.
realJim is offline post a comment

12-15-2009, 06:59 PM	#5769
Synapse Core Member [116%] MBTI: ENTJ Join Date: Dec 2008 Posts: 4,660	Granted. To get optimal water pressure, you end up taking water from everyone else on your street. Infuriated at you, a mob forms outside your house and they burn your house down. I wish I had a glass knife for decoration.
Synapse is offline post a comment

12-18-2009, 08:25 PM	#5770
realJim Member [37%] MBTI: INTJ Join Date: Jun 2009 Posts: 1,488	Granted! Your ornate glass knife makes it way into your life at the next garage sale you stop for. Good price and a beautiful knife. So sharp. So beautiful. So heavy. Someday it's going to fall off of it's show place and sever the thumb of someone you love. Should you get rid of it or wait in anxious anticipation to see if this wish really was corrupt? I wish liquor stores stayed open past 10:30 on a friday night!
realJim is offline post a comment

12-18-2009, 08:31 PM	#5771
hutbug Core Member [101%] MBTI: INTJ Join Date: Sep 2009 Posts: 4,072	Granted. You make your way at 1 am to your friendly local bevmo, and as you approach the entrance clutching your hardearned cash, the gang inside that's robbing the place sees you, takes your dough and shoots you for good measure. News at 6. I wish our politicians were all good people and not corruptible.
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12-18-2009, 09:25 PM	#5772
jonnyb Core Member [462%] MBTI: INTJ Join Date: Jul 2009 Posts: 18,513	Granted! You then woke up like your...., um, avatar, all wet. I wish hutbug an towel.
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12-18-2009, 09:27 PM	#5773
hutbug Core Member [101%] MBTI: INTJ Join Date: Sep 2009 Posts: 4,072	Granted. Turns out she doesn't need it, it's just pomade! I wish Jonny a pair of cotton pants.
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12-18-2009, 09:29 PM	#5774
realJim Member [37%] MBTI: INTJ Join Date: Jun 2009 Posts: 1,488	Granted! Too bad it's the cotton pants you're wearing. Now you are both doomed to walk around like Siamese twins for all eternity. Our snow prediction is for 6 to 12 inches tomorrow. I wish we get 25 inches.
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12-18-2009, 09:52 PM	#5775
jonnyb Core Member [462%] MBTI: INTJ Join Date: Jul 2009 Posts: 18,513	Granted! 25 inches. But, you didn't speecify in that sentence the noun. You get 25" of flamming gorilla shit to muck through. I wish for X-mas would go away!
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