[EsotericWench]

All the "experts" out there say that the natural complement to INTJ is either the ENFP or ENTP.

As an ENFP, I feel an immediate kinship with INTJs. I can talk to an INTJ for hours. It's like we both see the world in the same way.... which I suppose we do. Both ENFPs and INTJs take things in primarily via their intuition.

I don't know if there is a "perfect matching type", but it seems to require a lot less work to date someone who isn't a naturally complementing type.

Do you think there is such a thing as a natural complementing type?

[luther]

An INxj friend of mine has dated lots of people and has a good idea of what she wants, although she hadn't assigned that hypothetical person a type. She ran across someone who matches her list almost exactly. They get along very well. When I met and typed him, he turned out to be an ENFP.

As an ENTJ (weak on T and J), my matching type is supposed to be INTP. I love INTPs because they listen and understand what I'm saying without having to bring things to a conclusion all of the time. If I wanted to make a decision about something that's bothering me, I probably would have done it already. When I'm frustrated and need to talk to someone, I just want to be understood, respected, and appreciated. INTPs, INFPs, and INFJs are fairly good at that.

Even though I'm attracted to the three types mentioned above, the only relationships I've actually been in have been with INTJs. I'm very careful about choosing a partner, since pursuit is a lot of work and usually doesn't end up being successful. It may be that the INTJ's decisiveness has been necessary to choose me first so that I would want the other person more. It may also be that my own deciveness, my private careful evaluation and then the seemingly reckless and sudden decision to become romantic, can turn off people of types who don't understand decisiveness themselves.

Since I'm a guy, I think the INFJ or INTJ is a good match for me. A lot of women have are naturally gifted at listening but may be uncomfortable with my somewhat overbearing approach to decision-making. I think the J would make her similar enough to me to help her understand and support me.

[John254]

I agree. I have found that an INFJ, INTJ and possibly an ISFJ female works well with me. My myspace has a section about this.

[Verde]

i've found what you say to be somewhat true
my 3 roommates are all ENFP (we found out after 2 of us took the test in our class and made the other two take it when we got home)
I would have never thought that the living situation would work out, as the three of them do things differently from me (for example, I clean things as soon as I finish using them-I am really bothered with messes while they rarely care, and they definitely have different work ethic than myself-i think its the P against the J where the problems arise maybe)
however, I have very intimate conversations with them, especially one in particular, who gives me support and seems to understand me more than other people
the sad part is in the beginning of our living situation I almost wrote them off because of our differences, but now I see they have a lot to offer and I've learned from them, as I think they have from me
however I DO still wish they'd clean more!

[EsotericWench]

	Originally Posted by John254 To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	I agree. I have found that an INFJ, INTJ and possibly an ISFJ female works well with me. My myspace has a section about this.

I've often thought that there should be a dating service based on the MBTI. Seems like it'd save a lot of time.


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[luther]

Isn't Eharmony supposed to be that way? I haven't tried it, though.

If I were using such a service today, I'd choose to display my type in my profile.

[EsotericWench]

	Originally Posted by luther To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	Isn't Eharmony supposed to be that way? I haven't tried it, though. If I were using such a service today, I'd choose to display my type in my profile.

I took the eharmony profile a couple of years ago. For those familiar with MBTI, questions on the four preferences should be easy to pick out. I remember being disappointed that they didn't test for this. I just tried to Google "eharmony and MBTI" and didn't really find anything either. Maybe it's a question of eHarmony not wanting to pay for the intellectual property rights for the test.

[Antares]

Besides INTJ, which I'm clearly interested in, I also find myself drawn to ENTJ's and ISTJ's.

[AnandaMeansBliss]

For me, I think the ENTP would be the best partner. ENFP would be nice but the F has to be well-balanced. But I think this might be the case with all xxFx's.

[Splittet]

My imaginative perfect partner is an ENFP, but IRL I have little certain experience with them, although I have great experiences with highly intelligent EFPs, people I weren't certain if were N or S. What I think is dynamite between INTJs and ENFPs is that even if these types appear very different, when they get to know each other, they come to realize they can be remarkably alike. To be as different and alike as possible at the same is the recipe for maximum attraction. When it comes to F vs. T I think Fi is a lot more tolerable than Fe. I would prefer F in a partner because it is easier to open up then, and I need warmth in my life, not more coldness.

[DeepPurple]

I also prefer an F. I have a problem with expressing myself and opening up and the last thing I need is someone who is prone to the same problem. To me, dating a person who has the same problems that I have isn't really going to help me improve any. Not to say that T's can't be warm, but it'll probably take more time before they open up. Which is why I prefer ExFx types. I think dating one would help my social skills immensely. However, dating an E also seems a bit dangerous. Dating someone who probably knows a good deal of exciting people, has excellent charisma and maybe even an inflated ego, could most likely come back to bite me. I would like to date a P, but dating a J would seem like the safer choice. I think I might get burned bad if I dated and ExxP. I won't know until I try, and I will try, but I'll most likely end up with an ISTJ, INTJ, or an INTP.

*I don't think E's have huger egos than anyone else, but I am more likely to go for an E with a lot of confidence.

[Paul V]

I have to agree with those that mentioned Introverted Intuitives. I personally think and extrovert might tax my nerves even more than a Feeling type. I'd rather spend time with an INFP or an INFJ than with an ENTJ or an ENTP. They're the perfect friends to me, and I couldn't see them any other way.

[Des]

Not me. I can't stand extroverts. I also can stand needy sensitive people that can't handle the harsh world. Inflating other egos is not something I can do. I wanted a person that was just like me. I ended up marrying an INTP. OMG our relationship is heaven. We are coming up on our total 12 years together in February. It's so wonderful to relate and not only love the same things but hate the same things. The few differences we had are good ones to have. We are total opposites on food. Excellent. That means my food won't be eaten out of the fridge. I'm extremely territorial about things like that hehe.

[uberosity]

	Originally Posted by EsotericWench To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	I took the eharmony profile a couple of years ago. For those familiar with MBTI, questions on the four preferences should be easy to pick out. I remember being disappointed that they didn't test for this. I just tried to Google "eharmony and MBTI" and didn't really find anything either. Maybe it's a question of eHarmony not wanting to pay for the intellectual property rights for the test.

I think that eharmony uses the Big 5 personality test. You can find that online, too.

As far as the ideal partner type goes, I think that there are more complex personal factors than the MBTI can show. Also, how mature and developed a person is within their type is important. Personally, I get easily overwhelmed and/or annoyed by Es. I find that a more extraverted introvert works better with me because I am an extreme case. I love F sensitivity, but inevitably there are major communication problems there (I hurt their feelings and cannot inderstand the irrationality). Ss are too short-sighted for me much of the time. I like the P balance, though. Soo...

Now I am dating an INTP and it is fantastic so far, but I understand that this has a lot of potential for disaster.

[elsdfr]

	Originally Posted by EsotericWench To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	All the "experts" out there say that the natural complement to INTJ is either the ENFP or ENTP. Do you think there is such a thing as a natural complementing type?

I do but whether the person wants it is another thing. In the past I disliked ESFPs but a weak E is a lot of fun.

Its very hard in the beginning and I would have cut and run without knowledge of our differences prior to meeting. I've found relationships with similiar NT types are usually easy in the beginning but end soon after. Too head strong and I don't really care if someone agrees with me, just as long as they don't dismiss me, ESFPs will accept everyone.

If you are looking for balance and the perfect tag team I would go with the compliment, ESFP...(according to Socionics anyway)
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be warned though I think they might have ESP
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I don't know of ENFP or ENTP relationships, sorry.

[1OFMANY]

Thats funny...My wife took the test last night and...whammo..she is an ENFP lol.

[durentu]

I was reading around to see what the natural romantic preference is to the INTJ type. There seems to be some sort of dimension missing, because I see various responses. If INTJs are my perfect match, would any random INTJ in the world work? (the ENTP/ENFP was said to be shown from data,
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)

For myself, as an arbitrary starting point..

INTJ + philosophy {ethics, metaphysics, epistemology, logic} = me
where
ethics = what is the good life or right conduct
epistemology = what counts as genuine knowledge
logic = correct principles of reasoning
metaphysics = what sorts things exist and what are the essential natures

We can now ask the question, would I find a better match based on MBTI or philosophy?

Would I like a compatible MBTI with an incompatible philosophy
or
an incompatible MBTI with a compatible philosophy?

I think I would choose the latter.



There might be some loose correlations between philosophy and MBTI (this combo was gnawing at me for a while so I'm taking a shot at combining these two).
ethics : E vs I :: orientation to life, energy
epistemology : S vs N :: how to perceive information
logic : T vs F :: how to make decisions or come to conclusions
metaphysics : J vs P :: how to organize the world

hence:
one's ethics is determined by extrovertedness or introvertedness
one's epistemology is determined by sensing or intuition
one's logic is determined by thinking or feeling
one's metaphysics is determined by judging or perceiving

Assuming that all parties involved are wise defined by (
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S is wise iff:
1. S has extensive factual and theoretical knowledge
2. S knows how to live well
3. S is successful at living well
4. S has very few unjustified beliefs


There seems to be a correlation between one's MBTI type and one's philosophy. Is it a surprise that stoicism might interest NTs? Would there be a surprise that hedonism attracts ESFPs or the SP temperment? Would an INTJ and an ESFP have a wonderful relationship? sure but I think that their philosophies will have to be compatible, not necessarily the same.

So it might be said that MBTI is a subset of one's philosophy. Matching purely on MBTI would oversimplify the process with too many things left out. Am I wrong? probably, but the real question is, Am I completely wrong?... Let me know what you think as I'm still a student in both philosophical and MBTI matters.

So to answer the original question: I don't know which one is the better match for INTJ. To further the thought, are you looking for a good MBTI match or a good partner? :D I personally use MBTI as a interpersonal interpretation tool: a "me to them" converter/translator. I try not to use MBTI as a selection criteria.

Another vantage point is in regards to the intent of the relationship. If it's for family, sexual experimentation, peace corps, etc different personality types have natural preferences to make things easier, not impossible. It is also possible for INTJs to assume the role of any other of the 15 MBTI types, it's just not very natural to us. On the note of assuming different types, as we grow and mature, we develop different aspects of our type.
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Just food for thought.

[karen]

I don't know who the best partner is... my husband is an ISFJ.

there are only two things we have in common: we are both teachers (him social studies and I science) and for me teaching isn't a destination; we both like this HBO show called 'Flight of the Conchords'.

we disagree on religion, politics, morality.. he is emotional and calls me 'the robot'. He's OCD, I'm a perfectionist (there is a huge difference).

Despite all that we are a perfect match. Personality types do not dictate what kind of qualities you have I love him because of his intelligence, wit and passion for life. You can't plan that.

[Blendy]

Hmm.. I would probably say ENFP or INFP.

My boyfriend is an ENTP, and while he's engaging, extremely quick-witted, funny, and devilishly clever, beneath all this lies a cold, rational thinker. As a cold, rational thinker myself, I think it'd be nice to have a little F to balance things out.

[AntimonyLegault]

My teacher is ENTP, I don't think I've had a better...friend or colleague, ever. He seems knowledgeable in everything I could possibly want to know as a student at this point in my life (mainly about life itself and career). When I go to class there's always a constant interest between us in common topics, which we can talk about for quite a long time. Yeah if I could meet someone like that in the opposite gender it would be kewl.
It's interesting to note that he is a 'Jack-of-all-trades' type, so maybe INTJ's need people like that to balance their lives or something
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.

[jdc127]

Hello all... I just wanted to mention that in my experience it is very difficult to work through emotional moments when your partner becomes illogical and self-contradictory in the heat of the discussion/argument.





jdc127 added to this post, 0 minutes and 51 seconds later...

As some personality types seem prone to do...

[Hoorurly]

	Originally Posted by karen To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	I don't know who the best partner is... my husband is an ISFJ.

Interesting, my husband is also an ISFJ and we are pretty much complete opposites in most respects.

[Jenny Penny]

I think any type would be okay for an INTJ (or any other type, for that matter) if both people are mature and ready for a relationship. I'm exclusive with an ESTP (he is 32 and I am 27) and I already see problems developing. I'm not sure it is because of his type. He is fun and I am very attracted to him, but I always wonder if he is smart enough to keep me interested in the long run. I constantly find myself wishing he were more imaginative and enthusiastic, so maybe I am secretly craving an ENTP. I know I have always found ENTPs extremely attractive. I guess I could also find an INTJ attractive, but the experiences I have had with INTJ males have not been positive. The two INTJ males I have known in my life have been extremely self-absorbed and negative. I am initially attracted to INTJ males, but they seem to only be open to outgoing women who can break through their shells.

[Laura_Palmer]

I would choose the ENTJ because I think I would like someone just like me but a little more extroverted. I like guys who are decisive, outspoken, and non-conformist. My ex was an INFP (I think) and his indecisiveness and fear of confrontation were things that don't appeal to me at all. I want a guy who isn't afraid to challenge me or anyone else.

[errrzarrr]

"Who is INTJ's Ideal Partner? ENFP/ENTP?"
I'm sorry but why ENFP or ENTP?
Why not ENTJ ? The unique difference would be the I/E part, the other characteristics are the same xNTJ, so I ask why not ENTJ?

	"Do you think there is such a thing as a natural complementing type?"

hmmm... yeah... I am almost sure of it.