Makes sense now

**jm123** · 03-12-2009, 01:15 AM

Hello,

I knew there must be more like my out there, but never but my mind towards looking into it.

A little intro:

I am coming out of a turbulent decade for myself, that being my 20's. I have finally come to grips with who I am, at least i think so. Just took the Myers-Briggs style for the first time, and came up with similar results to other previous tests. I am married to an ESFJ. I am also starting to learn how to relax, and loosen up, but it makes me feel dirty. In addition I have finally reentered academia (2 years ago) after a much needed rest.

**zibber** · 03-12-2009, 01:50 AM

Welcome aboard!

(Just to get it out of my system, never mind this:
now now now now now now now NNNNNOW)

**Bobert** · 03-12-2009, 02:37 AM

	Originally Posted by jm123
	Hello, I am also starting to learn how to relax, and loosen up, but it makes me feel dirty.

INTJ's are not dirty, just a little taboo for most people.

Now you've found the perfect psuedo-place, here, you can be your natural self without being judged. Err, forget that last statement. We'll judge. It's in our nature.

Oh, and welcome!

**ProgFusionRoman** · 03-12-2009, 02:45 AM

Originally Posted by jm123

Hello,

I knew there must be more like my out there, but never but my mind towards looking into it.

A little intro:

I am coming out of a turbulent decade for myself, that being my 20's. I have finally come to grips with who I am, at least i think so. Just took the Myers-Briggs style for the first time, and came up with similar results to other previous tests. I am married to an ESFJ. I am also starting to learn how to relax, and loosen up, but it makes me feel dirty. In addition I have finally reentered academia (2 years ago) after a much needed rest.

Sounds like me in these ways
- turbulent 20s
- married to ESFJ
- during 30s re-entered academia
- rest was truly needed lol

ESFJs push our "emotional button" which is what we want and we push their "logic button" which is what they want.

Or in other words "they make us feel" and "we give them certainty (without which they panic)".

Welcome brother/sister?

In any case learning to relax is a biggie - I have only improved a lot with that now at age 38.

**Jonathan Brewer** · 03-12-2009, 03:18 AM

Welcome to the forum.

**Monte314** · 03-12-2009, 06:11 AM

Now this is a good intro post... brimming with nascent self-discovery emerging from a fading angst... showing a hint of hope yet maintaining proper reserve...

*smashes scurrying cockroach that drops out of hoodie*

... an honest, forthright presentation of oneself to a newly discovered world....

**doublejava** · 03-12-2009, 06:27 AM

	Originally Posted by jm123
	I am married to an ESFJ. I am also starting to learn how to relax, and loosen up, but it makes me feel dirty. In addition I have finally reentered academia (2 years ago) after a much needed rest.

Do you drink? I'd have to drink heavily if I was married to an ESFJ.

I know an ESFJ, she makes me feel like she constantly needs my approval on the stuff going on her life. So the more approval she seeks, the less I give. It's a game to amuse me so I don't suffocate her.

Oh, and welcome!

**Synamon** · 03-12-2009, 06:47 AM

Pfft, ESFJs aren't that bad, I haven't killed mine yet.

Welcome to the forum jm.

**jm123** · 03-13-2009, 01:40 AM

ESFJ's and conflicts depend on their severity of negative traits; similar to our type. My wife is not so bad, but there were times I wanted to end it; however, she finally got "it" so our relationship is enjoyable now. One of my subordinates at work, on the other hand, should be shot killed and mutilated. He is the most irrational unperceptive "average" person I have ever met, and it makes me realize how most INTJ's would balk at a relationship with one.

Oh yeah thank you for the welcome

**rwyatt365** · 03-13-2009, 04:28 AM

You're lucky that your spouse "got it", most never do.

Welcome to the next phase of your life.

**LionsPride** · 03-13-2009, 09:45 PM

Welcome to the forum jm123!

Kudos to you for being able to go back to school. I'm not sure I could go back. Too much theory and too little application (that is actually applicable outside the university). :P

**Apocynum** · 03-13-2009, 10:11 PM

Welcome

**dragonsscout** · 03-14-2009, 12:24 PM

Relaxing and loosening up is dirty? I must need to shower!

SLAP OF MOOSE!

Welcome to the forum, jm123!

Rudy · 03-15-2009, 11:41 AM

	Originally Posted by jm123
	My wife is not so bad, but there were times I wanted to end it; however, she finally got "it" so our relationship is enjoyable now.

That's a good example, then, in how MBTI traits can always be overcome. It's irritating to hear people use their MBTI type as an excuse, as in: "I'm an INTJ, so I don't need to be polite and considerate." All types have their weaknesses, and they can all be overcome.

**reb** · 03-15-2009, 11:54 AM

...except for mine.

welcome, jm!

Storm · 03-15-2009, 12:21 PM

*runs in* *pant* *pant*
Sorry, I'm a few days late. Welcome!

**loosefanbelt** · 03-15-2009, 12:25 PM

Yep, welcome - & brace yourself!

03-12-2009, 01:15 AM	#1
jm123 Member [13%] MBTI: XXXX Join Date: Mar 2009 Posts: 552	Hello, I knew there must be more like my out there, but never but my mind towards looking into it. A little intro: I am coming out of a turbulent decade for myself, that being my 20's. I have finally come to grips with who I am, at least i think so. Just took the Myers-Briggs style for the first time, and came up with similar results to other previous tests. I am married to an ESFJ. I am also starting to learn how to relax, and loosen up, but it makes me feel dirty. In addition I have finally reentered academia (2 years ago) after a much needed rest. Last edited by jm123; 03-12-2009 at 02:31 AM.
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03-12-2009, 01:50 AM	#2
zibber Core Member [407%] MBTI: INTJ Join Date: Mar 2008 Posts: 16,291	Welcome aboard! (Just to get it out of my system, never mind this: now now now now now now now NNNNNOW) Last edited by zibber; 03-12-2009 at 02:16 AM.
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03-12-2009, 03:18 AM	#5
Jonathan Brewer Core Member [135%] MBTI: xxxx Join Date: Feb 2009 Posts: 5,411	Welcome to the forum.
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03-12-2009, 06:11 AM	#6
Monte314 Core Member [407%] MBTI: INTJ Join Date: Apr 2008 Posts: 16,303	Now this is a good intro post... brimming with nascent self-discovery emerging from a fading angst... showing a hint of hope yet maintaining proper reserve... smashes scurrying cockroach that drops out of hoodie ... an honest, forthright presentation of oneself to a newly discovered world....
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03-12-2009, 06:47 AM	#8
Synamon Core Member [465%] MBTI: INTJ Join Date: May 2008 Posts: 18,616	Pfft, ESFJs aren't that bad, I haven't killed mine yet. Welcome to the forum jm.
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03-13-2009, 01:40 AM	#9
jm123 Member [13%] MBTI: XXXX Join Date: Mar 2009 Posts: 552	ESFJ's and conflicts depend on their severity of negative traits; similar to our type. My wife is not so bad, but there were times I wanted to end it; however, she finally got "it" so our relationship is enjoyable now. One of my subordinates at work, on the other hand, should be shot killed and mutilated. He is the most irrational unperceptive "average" person I have ever met, and it makes me realize how most INTJ's would balk at a relationship with one. Oh yeah thank you for the welcome
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03-13-2009, 04:28 AM	#10
rwyatt365 Core Member [261%] MBTI: INTJ Join Date: Sep 2007 Posts: 10,464	You're lucky that your spouse "got it", most never do. Welcome to the next phase of your life.
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03-13-2009, 09:45 PM	#11
LionsPride Core Member [225%] MBTI: INTJ Join Date: Jun 2008 Posts: 9,029	Welcome to the forum jm123! Kudos to you for being able to go back to school. I'm not sure I could go back. Too much theory and too little application (that is actually applicable outside the university). :P
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03-13-2009, 10:11 PM	#12
Apocynum Member [41%] MBTI: INTJ Join Date: Feb 2009 Posts: 1,641	Welcome
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03-14-2009, 12:24 PM	#13
dragonsscout Member [47%] MBTI: INTJ Join Date: Sep 2008 Posts: 1,886	Relaxing and loosening up is dirty? I must need to shower! SLAP OF MOOSE! Welcome to the forum, jm123!
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03-15-2009, 11:54 AM	#15
reb Core Member [257%] MBTI: XNTJ Join Date: Aug 2008 Posts: 10,280	...except for mine. welcome, jm!
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03-15-2009, 12:21 PM	#16
Storm Administrator MBTI: xxxx Join Date: Mar 2008 Posts: 14,681	runs in pant pant Sorry, I'm a few days late. Welcome!
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03-15-2009, 12:25 PM	#17
loosefanbelt Core Member [174%] MBTI: INFX Join Date: Jan 2009 Posts: 6,989	Yep, welcome - & brace yourself!
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