Reply
Thread Tools
How to Attract an INFP intj and infp
Old 03-11-2009, 04:42 AM   #1
Eruraweth
New Member [01%]
MBTI: INTJ
Join Date: Dec 2008
Posts: 15
 
Alright, so I haven't seen one of these floating around.

INFP's, how would an INTJ go about attracting your type romantically?
Eruraweth is offline
Reply With Quote

Old 03-11-2009, 04:45 AM   #2
demaugustus
Member [32%]
Now, as then, a beast approaches, patient and confident, savoring the meal to come.
MBTI: ENTJ
Join Date: Apr 2008
Posts: 1,289
 
This thread should help:
To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.


Edit: I thought I was INTJ at the time of posting this.
demaugustus is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 03-11-2009, 03:44 PM   #3
Vagrant
Core Member [162%]
Bananaphone. Boop boop boo-doo-ba-doop!
MBTI: INTJ
Join Date: Oct 2008
Posts: 6,480
 
The INFP I'm currently going out with... well, she introduced herself to me first. As time is progressing, I think my natural tendencies as an INTJ have been growing on her -- I'm usually quite blunt, a screwball, and confident in a lot of areas, but really shy in nervous in other areas (usually unexpected areas).

I respect her mind and her ideals, and hopefully I can make sense of them more as time progresses.
To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
Vagrant is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 03-11-2009, 05:33 PM   #4
Luci Sheffield
New Member [01%]
MBTI: xNFx
Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 30
 
Someone should create a basic sketch of what attracts specific MB types.

The INFP has been quite popular lately. I, myself, have been searching for clues.
Luci Sheffield is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 03-12-2009, 12:14 AM   #5
darynthe
Member [45%]
I may disagree with what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to mis-attribute this quote to Voltaire.
MBTI: INFP
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 1,824
 
No idea. If it is about myself personally I like intellectual men who have tons of self-confidence, even a little dominance.
darynthe is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 03-13-2009, 11:33 PM   #6
wotsamattaU
Member [18%]
MBTI: INFP
Join Date: Oct 2007
Posts: 759
 
Let your attraction be known to them. Try to be consistent in your attentions, not hot and cold. Realize you will likely have to be the one to make the first move.

Realizing someone finds you attractive is often the first step in your developing attraction for them. This is generally pretty universal for all types. You spark mutual interest in one another via your attentions.

INFP men are quite often attracted to strong, less overtly emotional women. The INTJ/INFP pairing is not an uncommon thing.

This is actually more of an NT/NF matter of attraction. Your similarities spark your interest, and your differences serve to fascinate. You round each other out.

INFP are quite perceptive to other people's emotional states. If you show interest in your INFP, they will then begin to study you. You're now on their radar. We will be looking for similarities, compatibilities and assessing your strengths.

Show your genuine interest in us by giving us one on one time. Listen and take our viewpoints under serious consideration, not dismissing them immediately. Let your N and Fi merge with ours - the resulting conversations can take on a heat all of their own.
wotsamattaU is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 03-14-2009, 02:11 AM   #7
AliTree
Member [39%]
lul wut?
MBTI: INTJ
Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 1,573
 
*might take notes for future reference if my INFP breaks up w/ me* ha.
the two i fell for bad i met through others. the one i'm dating i met through a mutual ESTP friend. ha.

i adore INFPs. i always fall for them ;-;
AliTree is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 05-28-2009, 10:11 PM   #8
infpgirl
New Member [01%]
 
MBTI: infp
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 25
 

  Originally Posted by antisocial one
To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
I am probably last guy that should give any advices in this area but I will try.

Personaly I think that reationship between ALL types are possible if both sides really give it a try.
So I dont see reason why two people cant have relationship especially if they share I and N.

Also I must ask how do you know he is INTJ?

It will be smart to check how strong is his J. Because stronger J will surely dislike when you late for 20 minutes or get lost in something.
Dont be depressive INTJ hate that and I think that INFP have good chance to be like that.He will also certainly value self confidence alot because we have problem whit people who dont have it and they are looking for comfort.
All other emotions are ok as long that emotions are not too expressed.
INTJs usually enjoy intelectual conversations so be prepared for them.


Whit more information I could go deeper.

I thought this comment reflected my relationship well. I am an INFP and my last relationship with with an INTJ that I loved dearly. We had communication problems, and seeing this comment made me realize that not getting too down and maintaining confidence is important for the INFP. He really didn't like people being late and I think my sometimes indecisiveness riled him the wrong way.

The other comment I agreed with spoke of INTJ liking more of an extrovert in social situations, and I think that is somewhat true. I know he didn't have as much fun at some parties with me, but I tend to be more one on one and sometimes quiet at larger parties. Our first few dates I was more animated and/or extroverted and I think that helped some. I also went through some stress and that deflates me easily and I need time to recharge...and I think I started wanting to have him around for rest and recharging and not sure that worked well.

But, again, if I would have understood him better and him me, then I think we might still be together. Communication, honesty and respect are so important to have and to not assume anything in the relationship, as I realized after the fact that I tended to over react and perhaps misinterpreted many things. But I did love him and would love the chance to really know him and use some of these personality types to help create a highly functioning relationship. It just takes willingness and caring.

Otherwise, I felt very comfortable with him...loved spending nights in and having some intellectual talks and someone who didn't need to be out at crazy parties all the time. I admired his intellect and accomplishments and his confidence. He was always more decisive than me and willing to break more rules. He did make himself available for deeper conversations and when I did risk sharing more emotional things (without getting too emotional) I was surprised by how well he could communice and try to be understanding. It made me feel more relieved, and especially his sturdiness and being able to talk about emotional reactions and not just be emotional helped calm me down and put things in perspective.

I think it can work if you appreciate and know each others differences and help provide balance and stability for each other. I also have gotten along really well with an INTP, who I found more soothing in some ways, though didn't challenge me as much.

infpgirl is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 05-28-2009, 10:21 PM   #9
BitsAndBytes
New Member [01%]
 
MBTI: INTJ
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 60
 

  Originally Posted by infpgirl
To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
I thought this comment reflected my relationship well. I am an INFP and my last relationship with with an INTJ that I loved dearly. We had communication problems, and seeing this comment made me realize that not getting too down and maintaining confidence is important for the INFP. He really didn't like people being late and I think my sometimes indecisiveness riled him the wrong way.

The other comment I agreed with spoke of INTJ liking more of an extrovert in social situations, and I think that is somewhat true. I know he didn't have as much fun at some parties with me, but I tend to be more one on one and sometimes quiet at larger parties. Our first few dates I was more animated and/or extroverted and I think that helped some. I also went through some stress and that deflates me easily and I need time to recharge...and I think I started wanting to have him around for rest and recharging and not sure that worked well.

But, again, if I would have understood him better and him me, then I think we might still be together. Communication, honesty and respect are so important to have and to not assume anything in the relationship, as I realized after the fact that I tended to over react and perhaps misinterpreted many things. But I did love him and would love the chance to really know him and use some of these personality types to help create a highly functioning relationship. It just takes willingness and caring.

Otherwise, I felt very comfortable with him...loved spending nights in and having some intellectual talks and someone who didn't need to be out at crazy parties all the time. I admired his intellect and accomplishments and his confidence. He was always more decisive than me and willing to break more rules. He did make himself available for deeper conversations and when I did risk sharing more emotional things (without getting too emotional) I was surprised by how well he could communice and try to be understanding. It made me feel more relieved, and especially his sturdiness and being able to talk about emotional reactions and not just be emotional helped calm me down and put things in perspective.

I think it can work if you appreciate and know each others differences and help provide balance and stability for each other. I also have gotten along really well with an INTP, who I found more soothing in some ways, though didn't challenge me as much.

@infpgirl

You discussed your indecisiveness; how did it manifest in your relationship with your INTJ? I'm an INTJ female in a relationship with an INFP male; he's the indecisive one about us. Did you find yourself being indecisive about your relationship? If so, why? About which issues? Did they have to do with the other person, or with you and your own emotional state?

Most importantly, when you were being indecisive, would anything the other person did help you to resolve your indecisiveness? Or did you just need to be left alone to resolve your issues on your own?

BitsAndBytes is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 05-28-2009, 10:45 PM   #10
infpgirl
New Member [01%]
 
MBTI: infp
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 25
 

  Originally Posted by xwalka
To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
Astute observation. I think that part of this is that an INTJ actually wants an equal relationship. If you obviously need them more than they need you, it doesn't seem equal at all. Also, they don't want the responsibility of constantly keeping someone else afloat; it's exhausting, and the prospect of failure is terrifying.

Also, try not to ask an INTJ how they feel; they hate that. Much better to ask them what they think; this will often lead them to telling you what it is you really wanted to know with the former question while actually asking the former may get you a panicked canned response. Be prepared to wait after asking what they think. This pause is them actually thinking and reasoning out the true answer to your question and should be taken as a compliment; it means they value you enough to be absolutely sure their answer is the truth. Even if you asked if the sky was blue, they would ponder carefully before answering. Most INTJ's who just read that last sentence are likely considering quite valid arguments that the sky is in fact not blue.

Wow, I think this is really accurate in reflecting my relationship with an INTJ. I really think the needier I became (and I'm pretty independent, just dealing with some stressful situations) that our relationship got worse. And he was incredibly self-sufficient. I liked it because I like having my space too. On the other side, it has been very hard to let go of him because he met so many needs of mine, which maybe supports this post...that maybe he was realizing that too and was uncomfortable. But, days I'm happier and doing things to take care of myself I'm not longing, but more just wanting to happily share with him and be playful. It is so hard to hold back though, but he is my ex, though we talked a couple times. I just still want a lover and a man and someone have fun with and regroup with at the end of the day.

But, if I did make the effort to talk simply and directly it was great. And I liked that, as I don't want to have many of the negative traits of an INFP and I felt he offered a role model on how to be more effective, though felt he could get uptight sometimes and could use just some warm love and someone to bounce ideas off of.

infpgirl is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 05-29-2009, 09:51 PM   #11
infpgirl
New Member [01%]
 
MBTI: infp
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 25
 

  Originally Posted by BitsAndBytes
To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
@infpgirl

You discussed your indecisiveness; how did it manifest in your relationship with your INTJ? I'm an INTJ female in a relationship with an INFP male; he's the indecisive one about us. Did you find yourself being indecisive about your relationship? If so, why? About which issues? Did they have to do with the other person, or with you and your own emotional state?

Most importantly, when you were being indecisive, would anything the other person did help you to resolve your indecisiveness? Or did you just need to be left alone to resolve your issues on your own?

I was somewhat indecisive about major issues before I met him. But, I generally wasn't indecisive about him. I knew pretty early that I was going to fall him, but I took it slow, or wanted to take it slow to make sure I could trust him. I felt sometimes more unsure about him when he was being more aloof and wasn't clear when he needed space. I feel I came off as more indecisive when I wasn't explaining to him fully where I was coming from...what experiences were causing me to behave how I was....or even sometimes tiredness and not having enough time to myself will put me off center.

I feared I would be judged sometimes for fully sharing my emotions or some of the pain I had been through that was causing indecision. So, I think just feeling comfortable that I could talk and be supported and not judged would have helped a lot, but I also grew up with some negativity and criticism, so partly my own issue of not assuming people are going to judge everything badly that I share about myself.

I know for me I become more indecisive when there is some emotion I'm not dealing with fully. And maybe you could add your perspective of how you would react to such a sharing or if you would be understanding of someones conflict. It isn't like I want to be indecisive...and it pained me to be so at times, so I probably tried to try to overcome it and be stronger about it and hide it, when really maybe I just needed to be more open. I found when I did trust him and let myself feel that it was so much better, and it relieved a lot of emotions I was holding in, so then I could move forward in action once processed feelings and felt supported and cared about. And I found when I did share and he listened and accepted me still that I felt closer to him and more sure about him and more loving...realizing it was a great way to get closer.

I miss him a lot at times, even though it has been 5 months since he broke up with me and feel there was just misunderstandings, lack of communication and failure to deal with conflict, especially as I'm afraid my trouble being open and not sharing my feelings separated us. It is just tricky to know...why communication is important. I think if he would have been better about asking me questions instead of seemingly get frustrated by some of my actions, that would have been good. Sometimes I need help discovering what is bothering me or what I'm really feeling.

So, I guess having patience and being non-judging and supportive is helpful. Also, I know I became aloof sometimes without realizing it just to protect myself from getting hurt, though I absolutely adored him...and I worry my love for him didn't get communicated well. Sometimes I just needed him to take a little action or give to me in order to open up and really feel safe loving so much. Men are different in that they sometimes want to be left alone to figure things out. But, I know for me that doesn't work and I want to let someone in and be there to help me work things. Hope this helps!

infpgirl is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 05-29-2009, 10:17 PM   #12
Hasway
Member [08%]
90% introverted
76.47% Intuitive
81.82% Thinking
67.74% Judging
MBTI: INTJ
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 344
 
My best friend is an INFP. I suggest talking to the INTJ, and breaking their bubble.
Hasway is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 05-30-2009, 12:51 AM   #13
infpgirl
New Member [01%]
 
MBTI: infp
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 25
 
My old INTJ totally drew me in. Once he told me he was "nerdy" I was a goner. He also pursued me and really was confident in his wanting to be with and being attracted to me and that made me curious and more comfortable and more safe. Romantic walks and talking was great...might be different since you are female as far as initiating. I liked his openness too...refreshing. I think just his making the effort and being physical drew me out. He was romantic too, which I loved. Brought flowers once, a surprise note on my car. Great kisses. Be a good listener too...or at least at some questions to get your INFP talking...sometimes that is all I need and a good audience and I become more happy and animated and attracted.
infpgirl is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 05-30-2009, 03:13 AM   #14
BitsAndBytes
New Member [01%]
 
MBTI: INTJ
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 60
 
I totally heart INFPs. They're so cuddly and emotionally intriguing.
BitsAndBytes is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 05-30-2009, 04:01 AM   #15
loosefanbelt
Core Member [174%]
[WARNING]
For Being Passive-Aggressive
MBTI: INFX
Join Date: Jan 2009
Posts: 6,989
 
One thing that I have been aware of in myself is that I would get sensory overload and would get a bit shy in the first stages of interest. So, if you flirt and the INFP gets quiet or looks away or gets strange at first, DO NOT take that as a sign of a lack of interest. The more nuanced the situation, the more I would guard my heart... and that would look like disinterest, but it is not.

I think the less games and the more transparent the approach, the more I would trust what was happening and be transparent back.

Our ability for crystaline emotion is pretty high if you can get past a trust barrier. Be real and you will know what we feel...

Let us know how it goes!
loosefanbelt is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 05-30-2009, 09:41 AM   #16
songofcalamity
New Member [01%]
MBTI: INFP
Join Date: Feb 2008
Posts: 47
 
I used to be intensely attracted to an INTJ, but I think it has simmered down ALOT now, since I am crushing intensely on someone else. A word of advice from me (though I am not experienced or well-versed in relationship/interactions area), just do something, talk to him, go out with him or something and if somehow you are stuck in this game of hide and seek (intuition guessing) with him, before it goes too far, do something, stop hiding, because when you do, it never really ends.

I shared this experience with said INTJ, and it's exciting, depressing and confusing all at the same time. There was this time where we shared an intense attraction for each other but because he was kind of a flirt and I feared rejection (ALOTTT), I kind of downplayed my feelings for him, if I did something nice (an out of character for me) for him, I 'covered' it up by doing that exact same thing for someone else, so that he wouldn't suspect anything. I think he did something similar and it just kind of continued, because we kept second guessing ourselves and the other party, basically it was like a mind game.

Now, at the present moment, we are still friends and we talk, shallow stuff/abt-where-we-want-to-go-to-when-we-grow-up and he knows that I have this ridiculous crush on a possible INxP, so really we are just friends. BUT still, sometimes, I don't know, maybe I am just over thinking, but I can feel something bubbling and it feels so weird. He is not ridiculously nice to me, but my ISFP friend has been constantly telling me that among all the other girls he talks to & etc, he treats me with the most sincerity and the least harshness. And whenever I am alone with him, he acts really weird. Like there was this time when we were waiting for the bus to come, there was something on his shirt sleeve and I just nonchalantly flicked it off and pulled the sleeve neatly, and he gave me a really ridiculous expression and there was also another incident where we were in a taxi with another ENFP, and I sat in the middle of the INTJ and the ENFP, and idk why but his thigh kept touching mine (I couldn't move mine away, because there was no more space left, zzzz), it was deja vu all over and I don't want to get into that "cycle/game" again and when the ENFP alight, he kept asking me if XXXX (location) was okay for me to alight and he kept giving me that big-eyed expression. (We left the taxi together because we live near each other so he was asking for the location to alight,)

Okay, in short, just do something, don't get into that vicious cycle. =)
songofcalamity is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 05-31-2009, 12:00 AM   #17
Illusion
New Member [01%]
MBTI: INFP
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 13
 
I'm in a friendship that's (perhaps) in the nascent stages of (potential) intimate relationship with an INTJ.

What drew me in? His directness and unfailing honesty. His readiness and enthusiasm for discussing anything and everything under the sun (or not under it), including personal aspects of relationship, emotions, sex, etc., in a nonjudgmental, nonthreatened/nonthreatening way (true, though, emotions are the weakest link--except when they can be rationally dissected, natch). His intellect, logic, confidence, decisiveness--yes, even--as Darythe mentioned--his dominance. His endearing obliviousness to convention. His unusual sense of humor. His oblique way of reassuring me that he's interested (multiple texts and lengthy phone calls a day, while I make a point of NEVER calling him, so as not to pressure)--even as he reiterates that we hardly know each other, we can't tell where this might lead, we can't put any expectations on it, etc. At this point, I think the capacity for mutual enjoyment and respect in the relationship is virtually unlimited.

Where does he lose me? By intentionally provoking me to emotionality in discussion (which thereby turns to argument, which I could happily live without), and generally when the traits that attract me are taken to extremes (isn't that always the case--that our strengths become weaknesses when they become extreme?): being so rational as not to admit of emotion, discussing emotionally sensitive subjects with no apparent sensitivity for my feelings....

Take a little care with your INFP interest from the start: When we sense hostility or indifference, we tend to beat a hasty retreat--indeed, a mortified one if we feel we've compromised our intensely private emotional world by being vulnerable to someone in whom we then have reason to feel we shouldn't have confided to begin with--and that ground is not easily regained. The trust barrier is very real, and very present. If you get inside it, you're already one of the privileged few. Treat that trust with the respect it deserves, as the rare favor it is. Enjoy the conversations, but resist the temptation to use your power sheerly for your own entertainment. Appreciate your INFP's quirkiness and oddities, as s/he certainly does yours. If you hold the apparent balance of power--INTJs usually do in this pairing, I think--use it wisely; that will reassure your INFP that he/she is safe with you. A safe INFP will blossom.

Last but not least, look up CuriousJane on this forum and read her posts...she's an INFP too, and almost everything I read of hers, I find myself nodding along, thinking "yeah, exactly--what she said." Guarantee that exercise will give you much more insight into the mindset and world of an INFP.
Illusion is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 05-31-2009, 06:31 PM   #18
curiousjane
Veteran Member [60%]
MBTI: INFP
Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 2,406
 

  Originally Posted by wotsamattaU
To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
This is actually more of an NT/NF matter of attraction. Your similarities spark your interest, and your differences serve to fascinate. You round each other out.

I've put a lot of thought into this lately and have come to the conclusion that the spark is basically we have a similar thinking pattern ... just about different things. Ideas pop out like fireworks. We see the fireworks and we go, "you, too? No way! This is incredible!"

The feeling of understanding is a powerful glue.

  Originally Posted by wotsamattaU
To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
INFP are quite perceptive to other people's emotional states. If you show interest in your INFP, they will then begin to study you. You're now on their radar. We will be looking for similarities, compatibilities and assessing your strengths.

Yes, yes, and YES. But we don't study like INTJs do. We don't sit there and stare and try to figure you out. We glance, observe, watch trends over time, pay attention to clues and hints and references. We are very, very good at noticing the correlation between things and ideas and people and events and cause and effect.

  Originally Posted by wotsamattaU
To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
Show your genuine interest in us by giving us one on one time. Listen and take our viewpoints under serious consideration, not dismissing them immediately. Let your N and Fi merge with ours - the resulting conversations can take on a heat all of their own.

Highlighted for emphasis. I cannot think of a better way to say this.

wottsa ... you are one of my favorite INFPs! Your way with words to express the things that we seem to know, innately, and can't fully explain why ... you GET it.

Everyone else ... when wottsa speaks; LISTEN.

  Originally Posted by loosefanbelt
To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
One thing that I have been aware of in myself is that I would get sensory overload and would get a bit shy in the first stages of interest. So, if you flirt and the INFP gets quiet or looks away or gets strange at first, DO NOT take that as a sign of a lack of interest. The more nuanced the situation, the more I would guard my heart... and that would look like disinterest, but it is not.

Oh, definitely. This is quite true. With my INTJ, I was a bit overwhelmed by the persistence with with he pursued me. It was what I had always hoped would happen, but when I was in the middle of it, I was shy. Those eyes were so intense ... I had to look away. I didn't know him that well in the beginning, and to feel the intensity of attraction was almost difficult to bear. I wanted him to find me attractive, interesting, a compelling conversationalist, etc., but the effect of being in the same area as his unwavering attention was almost paralyzing at times.

Until I fell in love with him. Now I can stare into his eyes and get lost ... or until HE looks away, smiling. Hehe. Tables turned. The full force of the INFP capacity for affection and intensity of our own came out at last. I just had to be fully comfortable first.

curiousjane is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 06-01-2009, 03:21 AM   #19
BitsAndBytes
New Member [01%]
 
MBTI: INTJ
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 60
 

  Originally Posted by curiousjane
To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
The full force of the INFP capacity for affection and intensity of our own came out at last. I just had to be fully comfortable first.

That's kind of how I feel. I just *know* Mr. INFP has this huge well of affection, passion, and intensity, but he has his feelings locked down just as effectively as I do.

At what point did you find yourself comfortable enough to show your actual emotions?

BitsAndBytes is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 06-01-2009, 04:18 AM   #20
nicocacolax
New Member [01%]
 
MBTI: ENFP
Join Date: Oct 2008
Posts: 57
 
1) You need to be a true INTJ.
2) Be yourself.
3) Be yourself more.

Good luck and all the best!
nicocacolax is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 06-01-2009, 11:20 AM   #21
curiousjane
Veteran Member [60%]
MBTI: INFP
Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 2,406
 

  Originally Posted by BitsAndBytes
To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
That's kind of how I feel. I just *know* Mr. INFP has this huge well of affection, passion, and intensity, but he has his feelings locked down just as effectively as I do.

At what point did you find yourself comfortable enough to show your actual emotions?

Just over six weeks, I'd say, for the beginning stages. At two months, I opened myself up emotionally and told him I loved him. I let myself be vulnerable at last. I can't put a time on it, but I'd say by 3-4 months I felt comfortable enough in our relationship to let my love pour out. I was actively trying to do things that were romantic, etc.

Keep in mind that since our relationship started online, and since we both were in slow periods at work so we could chat off and on during the day, in the background as we did data entry or what-have-you, our relationship progressed much quicker than some others. At times we were spending the better part of every day talking to each other. We saw each other every weekend (oh, yes, it's a long-distance relationship, which I think I might have mentioned before), and we talked every day either by chat, txt, email, or phone.

curiousjane is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 09-23-2009, 01:52 PM   #22
Seducer
Banned
 
MBTI: xxxx
Join Date: Jul 2009
Posts: 768
 
I've been learning about all the types and I'm really liking INFP the best. They have many great qualities I like. Their weak points are not a big deal to me. They lack the qualities that I really hate, such as being bossy and verbally offensive. I have many things in common with INFP's. They're like a feeler version of me.

I'm not into any humanitarian causes and I'm an atheist. Is that a problem?
Seducer is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 09-23-2009, 03:39 PM   #23
WoodsWoman
Core Member [1103%]
Watching everything.
MBTI: INFP
Join Date: Jun 2009
Posts: 44,159
 
It doesn't have to be if you are comfortably philosophical about it.

Most of what I'd have to say has already been said, just pay attention to that eye contact. Like CJ said - it may be tentative at first, but it really gets to me... or maybe I'm just more sensitive that way - don't know.
WoodsWoman is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 09-23-2009, 04:19 PM   #24
mrStevens
Member [35%]
Do you fuck up your sentence structure just to complete your yoda fantasy? -Vern
MBTI: INTJ
Join Date: Sep 2009
Posts: 1,424
 
I suspect my wife is an xNFP. We had a couple of classes together in college. She noticed me because I spoke up in class and asked a lot of questions. Stood out. I was taken at the time though so nothing happened. Later I asked her out and initially she turned me down. She was impressed by how well I took it and we went out as friends for the next couple of weeks. She then asked me out.

Marriage proposal went the same way...
mrStevens is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 09-24-2009, 03:08 AM   #25
d3molitionMayne
New Member [01%]
 
MBTI: ENFP
Join Date: Sep 2009
Posts: 60
 
Idk if it's an NFP thing but I know one thing that works for me is a willingness to express any emotion and not be awkward about. I don't remember the last time I felt awkward with someone else's feelings, people can tell me anything about me or them and I'll take it in stride.

There can be the greatest insecurities, deepest wells of sadness, or burning desires in your heart. No matter what it is, if you tell me, we will both feel better talking it out afterwards. I'm sure I have a story to tell and I'm sure I can laugh about it with you somehow. And after you show me who you really are, just maybe I'll like you back.
To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.


So... just be comfortable with yourself and don't be too afraid about looking silly! You don't have to hide how you feel for me or think I won't understand anything you feel.

Generalize that to other NFPs if you want to...
d3molitionMayne is offline
Reply With Quote
Reply

Tags
intj and infp

Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 02:12 AM.


Powered by vBulletin®
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Myers-Briggs Type Indicator, Myers-Briggs, and MBTI are trademarks or registered trademarks of the
Myers-Briggs Type Indicator Trust in the United States and other countries.