[Turbidea Warden]

I agree completely with the OP with respect to most religions.

The only way the problem can be avoided is if either one member 'isn't that into' their belief system or the religion involved doesn't demand belief as a prerequisite for heavenly reward.

As long as the religious member believes that they would harm their child by not indoctrinating them, I can't see a theist/atheist marriage going very well.

[Storm]

	Originally Posted by DaemonHugin To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	Simply put, one would think getting forced to be part of a religion would be harmful for the child - while the other would think NOT having his belief would be harmful.

Your mistake is assuming how people will act. A religions person could believe that showing children options is the best way to raise children. An atheists could think that allowing a child to forlic in religion to be dangerous.

People often don't fit into boxes like that.

[BlinkandThink]

I'm an atheist, so yeah. I'd date someone with any religious beliefs, as long as they don't try to convert me. But someone nonreligious would be easier, because of the mutual understanding.

[DaemonHugin]

	Originally Posted by Storm To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	Your mistake is assuming how people will act. A religions person could believe that showing children options is the best way to raise children. An atheists could think that allowing a child to forlic in religion to be dangerous. People often don't fit into boxes like that.

My estatement probably can fit a very high percentage of each side into it. But of course there are those very few, however if we dont generalize at some aspects we'll never assume anything anytime. Simply because no one can fit completely on any box we can make.

[crow]

	Originally Posted by Night Runner To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	Believers: Would you date an atheist? Does religion (or lack thereof) matter to you when it comes to picking a partner? Atheists: Have you ever been turned down because of, well, your atheism?

I did date an atheist.
She is now my wife of 14 years.
It caused no end of problems between us.

It turned out - however - that she did not understand what I meant when I used the term "God".
Now that she knows what and why I believe what I do, the problem has disappeared.

It is in my nature to be misunderstood.

[True Rune]

	Originally Posted by Firebrand9 To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	It's not. It's no different from being yourself and letting that attract and repel the right and wrong people for you respectively.

I meant for me to deal with.

[Wtfpeople]

Man, I would date myself if I could! We'd be a perfect match!

[Hamsta]

Chalk another one up on the "I'd rather date an agnostic / atheist" table.

Someone
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like me is slightly better than an agnostic or atheist from a different religion, if only because my mom wants me to marry "Jewish."
Don't force your religious views on me, I won't force mine on you, and we'll get along, at least in that area.

[Storm]

	Originally Posted by DaemonHugin To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	My estatement probably can fit a very high percentage of each side into it.

I doubt it. This is just your bias speaking.

[Zsych]

Well, I wouldn't turn down someone on account of them being an atheist. I wouldn't object to people who make that choice either, since there's no point in being in a relationship with someone whose basic outlook on life makes you uncomfortable, and who will likely keep making you uncomfortable.

In the absence of religion, I'd want to know what the basis of their moral framework is, and whether it seems solid (that applies somewhat differently to religious people), and of course, like any other person, I'd want them to be intelligent, and not overly emotional.

I find atheists who are religiously stubborn and preachy about their beliefs as irritating as any religious people who won't look at other viewpoints and try to preach to me.

[Vic]

Originally Posted by Zsych To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

In the absence of religion, I'd want to know what the basis of their moral framework is, and whether it seems solid (that applies somewhat differently to religious people), and of course, like any other person, I'd want them to be intelligent, and not overly emotional... That is not to say that an atheist cannot have a positive set of beliefs that guides them internally, just that religions and the threat of God (should one believe in the religion) constitute one approach to creating internal controls, along with offering positive ideals of behavior that individuals can aspire towards.

So do you believe religious people to be more moral on average than non-religious people?

If not, what does it matter what our motivations are?

Atheists do good not because they're afraid of eternal punishment, and not because they believe in some reward after they're dead. Atheists do good simply because it's the right thing to do. And when they do wrong, they have no one to blame but themselves.

Also, how strictly do you adhere to the 'moral guidelines' in whatever religious text you look to for guidance? I know plenty of Christians who throw out the whole 'no sex before marriage' thing simply because they don't like that rule. They say it's because that's no longer realistic in modern society. Fine. But okay, if that's the case, and you're able to decide right and wrong for yourself, did you really need the holy book to begin with?

[Zsych]

I don't follow a religion. I just said that its useful. When I had a religion, I followed the guidelines somewhat strictly.

For a believer to follow the rules, he must actually believe that the religion is real, and then have an understanding of it that makes him think that its in his better interest to follow the rules (rather than it being unimportant).

An atheist can have a framework that serves a similar function, but you don't have the threat of God, so its more personal desire or choice then it would be. In reality I would trust a pure atheist (knowing nothing else about him) only slightly less than a religious person, because religious people seem to no longer care about religions.

As for the no sex without marriage... I'm not sure that's a bad rule even in the absence of religions to support it. Its a question of what is beneficial to society vs. what a person wants. Typically laws are supposed to stop what isn't beneficial to society, even if individuals want it.
For example, look at AIDS in Africa, and the countless people dying from people exerting their desires... and imagine that having happened further in the past, in a society with free sex and no understanding of medicine. Yikes. It wouldn't be surprising if some societies were wiped out that way in the past.

Anyway, as far as atheism and morality goes, I personally found, when I gave up my religion, that I had no real reason to follow the rules. Well, I actually do believe in a God of sorts, and a type of after-life, but assuming I didn't, and assuming I thought that humans are just organic machines without souls, I personally would not have a very positive or moral view of things at all. I would have no real reason to care or to value other humans.

In a world populated by organic machines, or lets assume robots... I might be amused at the idea of creating a weapon/disease that destroyed the entire system. It would be an interesting game to play in a world where nothing had any real significance and nothing actually mattered, and where I had only a little bit of existence before it ends.

In the absence of God and the threat he poses, doing good or not, is an individual choice. If you're intelligent, you don't even really expect stuff like law enforcement to be able to get in the way of you getting whatever it is that you want, assuming its against the will of the society.

[Night Runner]

For the record: The OP was specifically about dating, not marriage or having kids.
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	Originally Posted by Zsych To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	religions and the threat of God (should one believe in the religion) constitute one approach to creating internal controls, along with offering positive ideals of behavior that individuals can aspire towards.

	In the absence of God and the threat he poses

Interesting choice of words.

Originally Posted by Zsych To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

Anyway, as far as atheism and morality goes, I personally found, when I gave up my religion, that I had no real reason to follow the rules. Well, I actually do believe in a God of sorts, and a type of after-life, but assuming I didn't, and assuming I thought that humans are just organic machines without souls, I personally would not have a very positive or moral view of things at all. I would have no real reason to care or to value other humans.

This is a very common assumption about us atheists. One does not need religion in order to be a good, firmly morally grounded person. They had morality in the ancient Greece (way before Christianity), didn't they? It looks like you grew up with your religion and it constituted a big part of your worldview and sense of your identity (though I could be way off here). Abandoning it took out a big chunk out of your sense of self.

	In a world populated by organic machines, or lets assume robots... I might be amused at the idea of creating a weapon/disease that destroyed the entire system. It would be an interesting game to play in a world where nothing had any real significance and nothing actually mattered, and where I had only a little bit of existence before it ends.

I strongly advise you to read Kurt Vonnegut's Breakfast of Champions - it deals with this very concept.

[plushbug]

As a calm agnostic who's read far too much mythology to take any religion seriously, I've learned to be extremely wary about getting anywhere near relationships with anyone passionately at either end of the atheist-believer spectrum.

[Synapse]

I don't care what religion my date follows. I've dated Jewish people, Catholic people, atheist people, etc. Religion certainly dictates your life, but I am incredibly tolerant of other people's faith. I don't care, and when I have talked to my dates about religion (as an atheist), I never say the stereotypical crap that usually spouts out of atheist's mouths (listen to "Opiate" by Tool for a good example of what I mean), I find myself having pleasant conversations about it (e.g "How did your religion help you in daily life?" and stuff) rather than God-stomping sessions.

I was always told to never talk about religion, but occasionally it's inevitable. What I've noticed is that the people who inspired others to make such an unofficial rule are those who adapt a "holier than thou" attitude towards another's faith -- thus the two people get into a petty cat fight over who's religion is "better" or more "truthful" than the others. In a non-relationship example, I have seen the power of that mindset create a schism (even temporarily) between people and myself: one of my friends is Jewish and one day he decided to spout about how Catholics are lying, opulent bastards who don't follow the correct books (he claims that the New Testament is blasphemous, etc.), etc. Not being Catholic, I attempted to explain to him (as I knew plenty of others who were) how the religion helps, but that arrogant mindset on his behalf only turned the conversation from an interesting one into a sordid one from the first time he opened his mouth...

[OhTheHumanity]

I am comfortable being with someone of pretty much any religious background, so long as it does not interfere with me, or said person does not try and convert or influence me.

[Reeds]

I'm currently chatting with a guy who claims to be a Pagan - I find I am thinking this will be an issue. I find most religious beliefs to come from early people wanting to make sense of the world they don’t understand so reach for the supernatural explanations, which later science explains. I have no faith and find that someone claiming to be a Pagan is deliberately seeking an obscure ‘cool’ religion – seems more about being trendy and alternative. Its as odd as someone claiming to worship Zeus in modern times or pray to Thor during a storm. In the end christain or pagan – it’s a turn off for me.

[TheGoodLocust]

Well, to be fair, it seems like a lot of atheists these days are real dicks, and more than a few seem to be doing it because it is "edgy" and faddy. I'd say most of the younger generation of atheists don't generally have a proper understanding of their beliefs or the courage to really adopt them.

That being said, I wouldn't mind dating someone who was religious, it really doesn't matter to me and I hardly ever get into religious arguments. Although, I suppose, it would be fun to date a Buddhist or a Hindu - hell, I don't even think I'd have a problem dating an LDS lass as long as she didn't mind my beliefs too much.

[Reeds]

I don't claim atheism either, that’s too intense for me; its like having a very strong opinion that the easter bunny doesn't exist.?! For me life just IS but I don't disagree with you - anyone who is militant in belief or non-belief would irritate me and put me off a relationship.

[TheGoodLocust]

	Originally Posted by Reeds To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	I don't claim atheism either, that’s too intense for me; its like having a very strong opinion that the easter bunny doesn't exist.?! For me life just IS but I don't disagree with you - anyone who is militant in belief or non-belief would irritate me and put me off a relationship.

No, I'm definitely an atheist - it is an accurate description of my beliefs. Nothing more.

A lot of the younger ones seem to be coming into it for all the wrong reasons and are way to close-minded/opinionated/militant about it - this shit really doesn't matter for the most part.

Atheism may not be a religion - but you sure wouldn't know it by the way some of us act.

[Buck]

I don't think I could date an Atheist just because I don't believe in their stubborn interpretation of the world. I could easily date an agnostic.

People who blindly say that there is no force out there that created the Universe or the laws that dictate it are just as ignorant (in my mind) as people that claim to believe that a 7 headed dragon is coming during the apocalypse. Science can be described as a type of faith, in a sense, just like religion. Both try to explain what we see around us that we don't understand.

I can easily agree/live with a person that accepts that there is truly no way to know either way.

My belief could have arisen from the many times I had to hold back from slapping a person who says they don't believe in Jesus, or Muhammad. They were real people, you don't believe in the idea that they were prophets or manifestations of god.
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