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#1 |
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Core Member [133%]
MBTI: INTJ
Join Date: Oct 2009
Posts: 5,328
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To the INFJs out there,
I personally see good in possessing some Fe, but am curious as to your thoughts, feelings or experiences on the matter. How much good does it do you and what sort of good, or does it seem largely like a problem? |
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#2 |
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Core Member [129%]
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It's good in the sense that I would never say anything like "Do not give me unsolicited gifts. If I wanted that I would have gone out and bought it myself." I can't imagine the world needing an attitude like; I can't imagine an attitude like that helping anything. I'm glad it would never occur to me to act that way. I guess that's all for now.
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#3 |
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Core Member [341%]
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I suppose it can be nice for those who are around us to have an empathetic ear. Don't come to be cheered up because the opposite will happen - you will bring me down as I feel your feelings with you. It seems the folks who are abundantly happy seldom need to talk these things through. Just my luck!
As well the tendency to always be polite and conflict-averse can give others the impression that you are a doormat. I will definitely be tempted to make too many compromises in romantic relationships but I am otherwise nobody's doormat. Finally, I'm not sure how much of the INFJ need for external validation comes from Fe but it is a bitch. The thinker's approach to resolving depression and unhappiness (hey! it's illogical to be depressed so stop!) is not translatable to me. The need to have someone else in the equation just stinks. tl;dr - Not a Fe fan. |
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#4 |
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Veteran Member [55%]
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Like DMWM, I'd like to have just about all the abilities that I can. Bring 'em on.
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#5 |
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Member [09%]
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That's quite a question. Fe on it's own can't do me any good or bad as my living action as an INFJ is dependent on 4 functions and their specific roles in relation to each other in my type.
I just have it. If I didn't have Fe then I'd be some kind of 3 functioned genetic mistake, I'd be unable to talk or think. Or you could look at it like this, without Fe I'd quite simply be one of the 8 types without Fe. |
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#6 |
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Member [33%]
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Any function on its own is completely pointless. So I'm not really sure how to respond to this.
Also every function has it's good traits and bad. I usually end up feeling like a doormat with mine, but it's not like I can change it so whatevs. |
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#7 |
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Core Member [175%]
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As an INFJ who seems to lack Fe, I find this thread lurk-worthy.
When I say that I lack Fe, I mean more like I lack compassion or empathy, as well as the capacity to facilitate conversations on topics I could care less about. It does come in handy for bullshit detection, however. (Or is it that people spout off bullshit most of the time anyway, and I'm just winning a numbers game?) Fuck... |
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#8 | |||
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Member [09%]
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I'm still not used to using emotive language properly in conversation, is this what you mean? |
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#9 |
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Member [36%]
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Not much personally. I rely heavily on Te in communication with my weak Fe doing some final polishing not to offend too many people.
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#10 | |||
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Core Member [341%]
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^ A good one. I can like that about it too. |
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#11 |
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Member [48%]
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I'm great at taking care of others -- knowing what it takes to make someone happy is a bit of my specialty, and I have to give some credit to Fe.
Agree on the bullshit detection as well. I read people well, and I'm quite good at picking up on their intentions. |
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#12 |
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New Member [01%]
MBTI: xNFJ
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 5
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They say Fe is about the feelings of others and the external world, but I've found it more to be a processing space - my emotions are literally in the external world, that's where they hang out. In the cat, in my friends, and through their processing. Through this and interacting with them, I can solve my own problems and learn more about myself. I don't find myself by going bananas in a dark room for 3 weeks, but by calling up a friend and talking about who we are,
And fe gives me a great deal of joy, happiness, it gives for subjectivity, as in seeing the world according to your mood, but I can always step out, say hello to my Ti(which is awesome, I love ti.> and get some perspective on things when I need to. I hate the fact that I make decisions too early and that I feel so safe though, I just can't control that impulse, I should be able to wait for a bit, rather than make premature decisions on things and be wrong, but that's what happens when your Fe is in charge for too long. |
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#13 |
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Member [04%]
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Fe is great for communication
A subtle touch of flavor amongst facts can go a long way. I don't believe that INTJs are immune to Fe, its just not as developed as it could be |
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#14 |
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Member [19%]
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It's a double edged sword. If I had the choice I'd like to be colder. Being able to sniff out BS like others mentioned is pretty nice.
I've often been called a mind reader, lol. Getting too emotional over things I feel I shouldn't care about is annoying. |
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#15 | |||
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Member [04%]
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It is easy to be a slave to Fe, in which case it is of no use, and some harm. I believe that with Ni and a strong Ti, the INFJ is the most likely type to learn how to wield Fe effectively. We do not seem as led by our emotions as many other feeler types are, even if we feel as deeply as them. |
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#16 | |||
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Core Member [133%]
MBTI: INTJ
Join Date: Oct 2009
Posts: 5,328
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That makes it easier to understand the importance INFJs seem to place on Ti. It seems a rather... scary or unsettling picture. |
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#17 |
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Member [33%]
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To be honest, my experiences with Fe thus far are more negative than positive. Yeah the BS detector is awesome but Fe makes it fucking hard to let go of people. Like super fucking hard. I wish I had Fi and could just drop people like the that but I can't I always seem to find reasons to not let go of that person even if they really are no good for me. Relationships suckkkkkkkk cockkkkkkkk with Fe.
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#18 |
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Veteran Member [55%]
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I see Fe as a really good mask (See avatar, one of the largest reasons I chose that is that the mask Hannibal was forced to wear is kind of like Fe to me.) and a means of protection, not to mention invaluable when it comes to gathering information together with Ni. Sure it has some downsides but I think the positive effects far outweigh the negative. A room full of dominant Fe people would probably be one of the most pleasant places on the surface no matter how hostile beneath. What better way to promote good relations no matter your intentions. (I mean the truth is in the proverb "Keep your friends close but your enemies closer") It seems one of the main problems INFJs have is their frustration with understanding their own emotions but Fe provides for that in a way as well through vicarious understanding. All in all I'm extremely pleased with what I have and wouldn't trade it for anything.
As for not being able to let people go like superflax mentioned, I've never had that problem. As long as I can justify my existence being better off without somebody the problem is solved and disconnect. Though I'm known to keep people at a distance and this might make things easier for me. |
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#19 |
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Core Member [133%]
MBTI: INTJ
Join Date: Oct 2009
Posts: 5,328
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Hmm.
Would hanging out and conversing with the maturer variety of INTPs:
Does anyone have any experiences to lend some further insight into the matter? |
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#20 |
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Member [04%]
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I'm not sure if observing someone with Ti helps as much as someone with Te, actually.
By having my thoughts logically picked apart and challenged, I can return to strengthen my rationality. I guess Te challenges my Ti, which is pretty much why I gravitated to this forum. Many times I feel disgusted by the use of logic to justify sociopathic ideas here, but I can't explain why immediately (I just fill up with burning rage). Only when I take some time away and put my thoughts in order can I see where there were logical fallacies or retarded assumptions. Other, more sane posters, seem to be able to quickly put into words what I think inside. Their efficiency at this is amazing to me, and I can learn as I read their thoughts so pointedly stated. So being around Te gives my Ti a workout. |
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#21 | |||
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Member [33%]
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Same. It's very hard for me to not get emotional during a debate when I know the other person is wrong but my Ti hasn't kicked in yet for me to be able to find the errors and articulate it properly.
Last edited by superflax; 08-01-2012 at 12:47 PM.
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#22 |
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Member [04%]
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To be honest I'm not close with any INTPs. I know quite a few people with Te functions though, so I guess I adapted. It would be interesting to meet an INTP though.
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#23 |
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Core Member [133%]
MBTI: INTJ
Join Date: Oct 2009
Posts: 5,328
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Interesting. I've experienced similar with Fe for my Fi.
But on the other hand for me some Fi users have... been very worth spending time with, on a close friendship level. |
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