[Merle]

There's a lot said on this board about how fantastic it is to interact with other introverts and that is certainly true sometimes - my fiance is an INFJ and it's always been incredibly easy for us to connect. However, I regularly run into incredibly awkward situations with other introverts - for instance with my cousin: we are literally unable to engage in normal, unstilted conversation with each other; and with a professor of mine with whom 'work' conversation flows fantastically, but absolutely everything else is unbearably awkward.

So, I was wondering about this...

In some situations, such as with my professor, I think the formality of the relationship (with its protocols etc) brings out the awkwardness...with my cousin, I don't know... I think he's an ISTP, maybe it's that combination of similarity and clash that produces the ultimate in awkwardness.

If I were going to some event where I didn't know anyone, I would always want to end up talking to an extrovert rather than an introvert - it makes casual conversation so much easier to have someone who knows what they're doing in charge, rather than two people equally deferring responsibility.

What do you think? Are there any types of introverts or types of introverted interactions that seem to amplify the awkwardness in you?

[Kearley65]

Not that I can recall no. Even if it is awkward for a little bit I can change it fast.

[AnnaMolly]

I assume that it probably depends on how strongly the introversion trait is expressed, and I also assume that introversion can be somewhat mitigated by F and, to some extent, P. I rarely ever feel awkward or shy when talking to people, even strangers. A little bit, yeah, but mostly it's cool. For example, I'm fine walking up to complete strangers on the street and asking them for something, or engaging a group of co-students I've never spoken to before in conversation while waiting around before a seminar starts.
I think my F and P traits can act as substitutes for extroversion in social situations, if that makes sense.

[Othesemo]

I don't find it terribly awkward. I'm generally as comfortable with silence or conversation, so whichever the other person tries for I'm happy with. It's only 'awkward' if you want to speak, but can't think of anything to say.

[Merle]

Originally Posted by AnnaMolly To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

I assume that it probably depends on how strongly the introversion trait is expressed, and I also assume that introversion can be somewhat mitigated by F and, to some extent, P. I rarely ever feel awkward or shy when talking to people, even strangers. A little bit, yeah, but mostly it's cool. For example, I'm fine walking up to complete strangers on the street and asking them for something, or engaging a group of co-students I've never spoken to before in conversation while waiting around before a seminar starts. I think my F and P traits can act as substitutes for extroversion in social situations, if that makes sense.

Yes - I find INFPs amazingly easy to talk to - we can have just met and we'll be having a super intense, deep conversation about something within minutes. I think F is a big help to interaction for Is.

I find other INTPs and some INTJs extremely difficult to get to know on a personal level - I instinctively feel that we have so much in common, often, but then can't get past the communication barrier, where E-types are happy gabbing with them and engaging them easily. I find that very frustrating - that there are these people with whom I know I share a lot of interests but with whom I can't connect in the way that Es can... no-one else runs into this?

I think it's aggravated by my being a British person living in the States - I have all these tics that Americans take for subservience or lack of confidence (saying sorry all the time) that actually are just normal Britishness (and often mean "you're an idiot", not "sorry") - and that clashes with the self confident manner of many Americans (even introverts are much more forceful here).

	Originally Posted by Othesemo To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	I don't find it terribly awkward. I'm generally as comfortable with silence or conversation, so whichever the other person tries for I'm happy with. It's only 'awkward' if you want to speak, but can't think of anything to say.

Maybe that's personally true for you, but I don't think that's the case for everyone - I am mostly completely content to sit in silence with someone, or to talk, as they sit fit (almost certainly the other person is the instigator of how our interaction will play out)....these situations are different and aren't awkward because I can't think of anything to say, but because I have a huge amount to say but the double barrier or two introverts not being quite sure when/what/ and how it is appropriate to say it stops it from getting said at all.

[followthehippos]

The only time I've ever noticed awkwardness with introverts is when it comes to introverts I don't speak with very often. Once I get more comfortable with introvert pals it seems we do a pretty good job of having a steady flow of conversation. Plus, I can usually think of a topic to bring up that will get engagement either from them or myself.

[hi5yourface]

I only find it awkward in the initial conversation stages but also sometimes maintaining a relationship with an introvert can be a challenge as well since you may both tend to not need much interaction whereas your extroverted friends may be more likely to give you a call and keep things smooth running
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[Vocal]

Maybe *walks of suspiciously*

[jetplane48]

What are "friends"?

[ummon]

I find smalltalk much more awkward than silence. This is why interacting with other introverts is so much less awkward.