[Zodd]

You'll always find out things you don't like about her, so I rather keep fantasizing.

[teri]

Yup, I will google a name or whatever. I mean, It would be great if you could just trust a person until proven otherwise...but that would either take forever or it would be risking your safety for no reason(though it is still risky whenever agreeing to go out with someone you do not know very well, even if you have checked them out). Anyway, it is reassuring when you see that the person is who they say they are, has a group of decent people that they know very well, etc.. That said, sometimes nice guys turn out to only seem nice.

[Lilie]

Only if it's just a crush and not someone I would actually have a chance with.

[SwedenF]

	Originally Posted by curiousgeorge01 To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	He probably found you as a possible romantic interest.

He is gay, haha. And the way I see it, if you want a face to go with the person, then ask for it. Trying to find pictures of me without my permission is just invasive. (No, I don't have my own picture on facebook.)

[deconspire]

No. I find it invasive, public info sphere or not. Plus, it makes me feel creepy.

[DeepThought]

If I were to suddenly find myself single again I would only consider it if I had reason to suspect something a prospective lover/mate had told me wasn't right. Otherwise, I'd try to get to know her the old fashioned way.

[wizardblues]

I stalk anyone of interest to me online. Of interest meaning not only someone I think I might be "interested" in but anyone sitting adjacent to me in class, friends of friends, people selling things on craigslist... etc. Occasionally random people just because I'm bored. I do it mostly just to have knowledge of who I'm surrounded by, and also I have no IRL social life and am paranoid of socializing with such things as facebook, so this is how I build my social circle (albeit imaginary).

If I'm "interested" in someone, I try to find out everything that the internet has to offer about them. Which I'm really good at.

[The Dan Keizer]

I don't even look at my real life friends' profiles or pictures on Facebook. In other forums I have been posting along with the same few dozen people for years and I still have trouble remembering who is who. I don't care about anybody but myself.

[Zhen]

	Originally Posted by castalia To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	DO INTJs try to gather info about their romantic interests from online sources?

1. what romantic interests
2. no that's just creepy!

i do go and read about interesting public figures though esp if I saw them in a documentary or something.

maybe it has something to do with being the facebook generation or not...i've noticed my younger friends tend to do alot of online stalking to the point i find it seriously disturbing...

[Bluesea]

This was a strange concept to me; as I see stalking as a behaviour that is like following someone around without them realizing. But online searching for things the person themselves has entered into the public domain deliberately to be available for searches - perhaps from potential old friends or family or whatever does not seem to equate to stalking to me. If meeting a new person in whatever context and curious are about them for whatever reason, and they have online information that is comfortable for them to let other's see - as they've published it knowing others could - how is that creepy? They have advertised to the world that this is information they are comfortable with everyone knowing about them? It would be creepy to look in their windows at night and find out where they live and details they have not made public and are personal; however facebook etc is not like this and people choose their security protocols to either make things seen to others if not 'friends' or not. They must be ok with the information they chose anyone can see about them, surely?

I value privacy highly and would not do anything to violate someone elses just as I would not appreciate anyone violating mine; however I do not see how looking at something a person has published about themselves publicly fits into this situation and would not be offended or feel it was creepy if someone searched my name. I guess I can't also see how someone would be stupid enough to publish things about themselves online and then lie about them in person, when we live in an age where it is so easy to search online, and they have made it public what the situation is with them?

[babsa]

Well by the definition of stalking, i think that most people would be guilty of it. It simply means to pursue something, but i think that stalking has developed a more sinister or profound meaning within the last decade or so. I don't go through much of an effort to find out about people beyond just looking at their profile via social medium. IRL, i wouldn't mention them to anyone, or at the very most, ask something about them subtly. One time i broke into someone's email (i don't like to use the term hack), but i felt bad about it and i don't see myself doing that again.

[AnaK]

	Originally Posted by deconspire To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	No. I find it invasive, public info sphere or not. Plus, it makes me feel creepy.

Is it creepy to read marriage and birth announcements in the newspaper? If someone posts personal information online under their real name in a search-able site, it is crazy to get offended when people find it. Almost like they protest too much. I have a LinkedIn profile, and anyone could easily look at that. I put it there, so I can't really get mad if people look at it.

And like some stuff is published in the newspaper or phone book, some stuff is published online. In 10 minutes a person could find out my address, phone number, most of my past addresses, how much I paid for my house and how much my real-estate taxes are. In fact, my county even has the floor plans of my house available online. That is just life today. Every local government employee's salary is published by my local newspaper. There is a link to search the salary database on the newspaper's front page.

---------- Post added 06-11-2012 at 08:39 PM ----------

	Originally Posted by babsa To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	One time i broke into someone's email (i don't like to use the term hack)

THAT is crossing the line and is creepy.

I think a good guideline is if someone has an expectation of privacy. For example, when I am walking down the street, I can not really get mad at someone for looking at me. If I am at home and someone climbed a tree to peek into my windows, that is creepy,

[zeroemission]

my M.O. is take your time to get to know someone. i'm more inclined to wave buh bye than stalk.

[Ethos]

I thought this thread was about learning what interests your romantic target has and learning as much about those interests as possible.

^^ I do this.

[Fox]

I don't consider research someone online stalking.

I do plenty of research. I've found so much dirt on people from mug shots, to porn, to a lesbian past and to a urine fetish.

[Still Standing]

	Originally Posted by Fox To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	I don't consider research someone online stalking. I do plenty of research. I've found so much dirt on people from mug shots, to porn, to a lesbian past and to a urine fetish.

That's how I see it too. Smart bosses probably "stalk" potential employees before hiring them as well.

[SwedenF]

	Originally Posted by Still Standing To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	Smart bosses probably "stalk" potential employees before hiring them as well.

Smart bosses pay people in China or Japan to hack peoples facebook accounts to get the information even if they didn't make it public to all.

I think there's a fine line to walk between just browsing info someone gave out willingly, and digging to find things.

[zeroemission]

and there should be a LOT more digging around in bosses' biz and what THEY'RE up to!

can i get an INTJ "YOU KNOW IT!"?

[Thinktress]

	Originally Posted by castalia To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	DO INTJs try to gather info about their romantic interests from online sources?

Umm... well... ok, yes.

Hey, I try to gather info on anything I'm curious about. On the other hand, I absolutely will not look at a bf's cell phone, or email, or anything else that could be considered private or personal. To me, that's an invasion of his privacy, while the online info is out there on the internet for anyone to see. Probably a rationalization on my part, but in matters of love, I'm not necessarily completely rational.

[Tigey]

I call it...research.

[Eyedears]

	Originally Posted by Bluesea To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	Post #35

YYYYes!
To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.


I communicated with someone for a while online 4 years ago (after "meeting" him thru his blog): I googled his moniker and found all kinds of things that revealed more about his character; I also foraged back thru his blog archives.

It is "stalking" only if you harrass the person in some way. Simply gathering info is called "prudence."

[Arbosis]

Originally Posted by Bluesea To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

This was a strange concept to me; as I see stalking as a behaviour that is like following someone around without them realizing. But online searching for things the person themselves has entered into the public domain deliberately to be available for searches - perhaps from potential old friends or family or whatever does not seem to equate to stalking to me. If meeting a new person in whatever context and curious are about them for whatever reason, and they have online information that is comfortable for them to let other's see - as they've published it knowing others could - how is that creepy? They have advertised to the world that this is information they are comfortable with everyone knowing about them? It would be creepy to look in their windows at night and find out where they live and details they have not made public and are personal; however facebook etc is not like this and people choose their security protocols to either make things seen to others if not 'friends' or not. They must be ok with the information they chose anyone can see about them, surely? I value privacy highly and would not do anything to violate someone elses just as I would not appreciate anyone violating mine; however I do not see how looking at something a person has published about themselves publicly fits into this situation and would not be offended or feel it was creepy if someone searched my name. I guess I can't also see how someone would be stupid enough to publish things about themselves online and then lie about them in person, when we live in an age where it is so easy to search online, and they have made it public what the situation is with them?

I share this completly. There is no stalking in using information provided voluntarily by the subject, I use that information when I'm interested in someone