[LifesEcstasy]

Trust is something you can only break once and the pieces can never be put back together again. No trust, no relationship. Sure some people might stick it out but their view of that partner is changed forever, whether they like it or not. I personally couldn't stick with someone where I would forever wonder what else they've done and I've just not found out about yet.

[Midhiel]

I tried to think of situations in which I would be able to forgive them, and excuses that I would accept and move past. I couldn't think of any. What it comes down to in the end is that either they were under the influence of something that made them unable to think clearly, or they deliberately chose to betray my trust. Neither of those is an acceptable excuse for cheating on me. So...bye.

[Archer]

My wife had an affair for almost a year before I found out. I have three young boys and was under the illusion that the previous 15 years was a good marriage. I didn't ask for a divorce, but hoped for reconciliation. Through reading books on affairs, I had to do my part and take responsibility for the failed marriage to try to make it work.


Three months later she asked for the divorce. Eventually I found out she was never honest about the previous year, she was involved with at least 2 men.

I feel foolish and naive for holding out, hoping that it would work out. Divorce was the best option. Looking back I wish it was me that would have asked for the divorce.

I didn't know how to answer the poll, so didn't.

[JTG]

	Originally Posted by Nomatterwhat To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	If she is acting like she loves you after fucking someone else i guess it has to be acting.

Not necessarily. Human emotion is not an easily quantifiable thing.

[The Dan Keizer]

I'm not a jealous type and I don't really equate monogamy with love.

That said, I would be pissed if somebody was going behind my back but it would be because they didn't tell me they were having the feelings leading to the cheating and because they didn't give me permission to go get some pussy myself.

---------- Post added 06-06-2012 at 09:32 PM ----------

	Originally Posted by Archer To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	I feel foolish and naive for holding out, hoping that it would work out. Divorce was the best option. Looking back I wish it was me that would have asked for the divorce.

Dude there is nothing wrong with wanting to hold an otherwise successful marriage together in the face of adversity, especially if you guys had kids together. Just because you were in the end more dedicated to the relationship and your vows does not make you foolish or naive.

[Miryr]

I might keep them around but I would never trust them, more than anything because they lied to me. I don't really care all that much about the act itself if it was done responsibly.

[Foggers]

Once a cheat, always a cheat.

A girl cheated on her boyfriend with me several times. I told him about because she was being a psycho bitch. When I told him he said that he has loved her for two years and they've forgiven each other in the past for stuff.

She has cheated on him before. Hell, she even slept with a third guy during the time we were sleeping together.

All of my friends are shocked about it, she easily manipulates him and walks all over him. It's so bizarre. He is an idiot and so is she so I guess they kind of work together. But not really.

[Linwenilid]

My husband is clearly aware that, if he ever cheats on me, I'm out. I'm giving unrelenting fidelity and demand the same of my partner; it's only fair. Of course, we both work actively to make our marriage fun and a wonderful place for the both of us, so I think we're both safe from looking around.

[SeverusSin]

Dead in the water. There is nothing. A void of empty space where interaction once was. Thats the result of any betrayal against me, that applies to friends too. I don't keep many people close but people I do keep close I trust wholeheartedly.

[Chronos]

I'd probaly consider it over. No matter what the excuse is, I'd be too unable to trust the person ever again. Of course, this is hypothetical, so this would depend upon the person and the circumstances, but I still find it unlikely that I would stay with her.

[gunkuarve]

Obviously over. They don't need our forgiveness because trust is the most important foundation when it's come to romantic relationship.

[Sniped Soul]

It's over. If they don't want to be with me anymore they should at least have the good decency to break it off with me before screwing someone else.

[imperio]

Depends on whetherthe intent is there, though it usually is.

I don't know, but if your definition of "excuse" considers a bizarre circumstance whereby said partner was drugged and whatever, then I probably will forgive. But otherwise, no.

[frontaLobotomy]

They'd cease to exist to me the second I found out, and would go through the motions accordingly. Fortunately, I've never been cheated on, nor am I the sort of person that gets cheated on. I'm not threatened by other men, so I don't get paranoid about that sort of thing. If they went with another woman? I wouldn't be too bothered about that either, it's not like I can compete with that <shrug>

[teri]

It happens, no one is perfect and everyone makes mistakes.depending on the circumstances, and why it happened,why not forgive and move forward.

[Coralaisly]

In my opinion, there is no good reason to cheat. If he cheats on me, we're done. I tried once patching things up after that, but honestly, all I could think of was him running off to screw someone else every time we argued or he was gone for a little too long , and I wasn't able to move past it.

Before he gave me a reason to doubt his faithfulness, I honestly never did. If he was gone longer than expected, I would assume something or a few stops dragged on or he stopped to grab a bite to eat or something. I never once accused him because it never once crossed my mind he would do that to me. Once I discovered otherwise, however? My trust was anihilated and I found it difficult to even have an otherwise normal conversation with him without thinking about it.

There is a lot I can look past, but once you betray my trust, it can be difficult to impossible to earn back.

[Distance]

	Originally Posted by teri To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	It happens, no one is perfect and everyone makes mistakes.depending on the circumstances, and why it happened,why not forgive and move forward.

Why bother? There are plenty of non-cheaters out there who people can trust.

[Lucrezia Borgia]

	Originally Posted by SeverusSin To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	Dead in the water. There is nothing. A void of empty space where interaction once was. Thats the result of any betrayal against me, that applies to friends too. I don't keep many people close but people I do keep close I trust wholeheartedly.

My sentiments exactly. Once trust, respect, and loyalty are gone all you have left is a sham of a relationship.

A family member's husband has been cheating on her for the last 30 yrs. or so. She decided to stay with him 'cause she had too much invested in the marriage (kids, grandkids, finances) but the main reason being that she doesn't want to be alone. When in public, they put on the facade of the happily married couple, calling each other "honey" and "sweetheart" but at home they sleep in separate bedrooms (for years) and hardly speak to one another except to call each other names. She has been seeing a psychologist for many years to help her deal with her messed-up emotional state caused by his dalliances and lying, but still wont leave him. The psychologist has tried to make her understand that she's already 'alone' by living in that situation but she just doesn't get it, or more precisely, doesn't want to get it.

My point being, that sometimes people are their own worst enemies in the choices they make in life. Personally speaking, I could never forgive and trust someone again, let alone forget, but I can't speak for anyone else. It's their life.

[Shadeylark]

about ten years ago, when i was in the Navy, i got an opportunity to come home early from my second 6 month deployment. needless to say i was more than excited at the prospect of getting away from iraq and seeing my beloved.

i got home, went to my apartment, which i shared with the woman i had proposed to a month before being deployed and was now engaged to.

my key didn't work at the front door. i didn't think anything of it, figured i'd either forgotten which key it was or left it back on the boat.

when i rang the door bell and had a guy from another boat that wasn't deployed answer, someone i knew and had worked with before, i didn't think anything of that either. i knew that when someone was deployed and away from home, friends and family spent alot of time supporting each other.

then i got inside, and saw her standing, wearing nothing but a bed sheet, in the bedroom doorway.

i just shook my head and walked out without a word. didn't really trust myself to say or do anything different at that point.

a few months later, after having found out that she'd initiated the affair, and after having broken it off with her... i heard through the grapevine that she'd pulled the same exact stunt on the same guy i'd walked in on her with.