[pure potential]

Avoided/missed the point. Was referring more towards this definition:

-lonely: destitute of sympathetic or friendly companionship, intercourse, support, etc.

Could also mean a general feeling of loneliness, even in social situations. This leans towards depression, but isolated, could tell you a lot about where you are versus where you'd like to be emotionally(/socially). Joining an online community helps deal with loneliness, so if this is part of your case, you're on the correct path.

[ENIT]

Originally Posted by pure potential To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

Avoided/missed the point. Was referring more towards this definition: -lonely: destitute of sympathetic or friendly companionship, intercourse, support, etc. Could also mean a general feeling of loneliness, even in social situations. This leans towards depression, but isolated, could tell you a lot about where you are versus where you'd like to be emotionally(/socially). Joining an online community helps deal with loneliness, so if this is part of your case, you're on the correct path.

No, I don't feel lonely. I'm around people whose company I enjoy.

[Paul Siraisi]

	Originally Posted by ENIT To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	It's pretty much been the crux of the entire topic. Things don't make me feel good. Big things, small things, easy things, difficult things, long-term goals, short-term goals. I feel nothing living in the moment and I feel nothing planning for tomorrow. None of that stuff.

'Feel good'. Hm. I'm pretty robotic myself. My built-in range of feeling is simply limited.

I can say at this moment I have no feelings at all, and that's pretty much my whole day, with just the occasional blip in some direction or other.

Now I balance that by being disgustingly easy to please. I take full pleasure in a sunny day. It's quite infantile (I can also explode with very short-lived anger). If I were to take a strategic approach to my life, I would conclude that I have very little purpose (and that I'm disgustingly easy to please). Feeling hardly anything AND seeing no reason to live would be a pretty drab prospect. Is that what you've got?

And are you sure you don't smile in good weather?

[BlackMita]

	Originally Posted by ENIT To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	I'm not interested in the aforementioned emotional pleas, but since I'm not in the best state of mind, it's pertinent to have a third party check my premises and conclusion.

The real shame is you should just be able to ask your loved ones. But these seventeen pages are a pretty good testament as to why that's almost always unfeasible. Society isn't ready for this conversation. Interesting thread anyway...

[cburke]

	Originally Posted by ENIT To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	No, I don't feel lonely. I'm around people whose company I enjoy.

Well there's a reason to live right there. Unless by "enjoy", you mean you're miserable.

[Deliberator]

To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.


I work for a neuroscience lab that studies the alpha-7 receptor and dopamine receptor, and I bet you have a malfunction in dopamine signaling. I know you say you've tried meds but which ones? What if you've been given SSRI's when what you need is a low-dose antipsychotic? Or a stimulant such as adderall? How much research into drug therapy have you done?

[ENIT]

	Originally Posted by cburke To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	Well there's a reason to live right there. Unless by "enjoy", you mean you're miserable.

Not good enough.

---------- Post added 05-22-2012 at 12:49 AM ----------

	Originally Posted by Deliberator To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	How much research into drug therapy have you done?

Relatively little.

[o7xx12]

i wish there was something i could say that would disprove your reasoning to end your life based on the fact you are unable to be happy.

im very unhappy as well and have set a well thought out date to end my own life.this is mostly due to trying very hard to become independent and needed for 'something', but nothing ive engaged in ever grew into anything fruitful.

my military career got ruined because i was raped, held against my will for 2 days in a storage room, and then when they found me, after a week in the hospital they decided to send me to a psychiatric facility. they 'forgot' about me for 3 months -- when i demanded to be let out of there they medically discharged me from the military.

on my own i would have died. my then 'boy friend' decided he wanted to help me (he was older and "wiser" i thought ... i was 20 -- while having landed in another psych facility for trying to hang myself, he asked me to marry him.I had no one else, and in hopes of finding happiness i said yes.

2 yrs later he tried to kill me. he was tired of all my mental issues and got angry one night after drinking (we were at the beach) and after i went into the water to throw up he followed me and pushed me in and held me under. he did change his mind after a minute or 2 and told me "you are not worth it" and walked out of the water leaving me there.

well we divorced and i moved away from everyone -- no friends or family (they were all toxic people anyway). i decided school was what i needed. i proceded to earn a degree, and then another degree ... but throughout a 6 year time frame no one would hire me -- i had 'student jobs' that paid very little, but nothing career making.

so military, marriage, school ... what next? im so unhappy i could die... i want to die... i yearn for death so much i fantasize about it all the time.

i am a drain on my country, i am a waste of space and financial support that the VA benefits covers me with.

i do not hatemyself -- i feel like i have done everything and anything to seek out a way to be a useful citizen but nothing has sprouted into anything that even resembles having been a positive influence on the world around me.

i wish more than anything that no one ever felt as unhappy as i feel.but i would be a giant hypicrite if i tried talking anyone out of ending their life.

im sorry you feel the way you do. i have a few weeks left of life because i am committed to the date i have set for myself -- it is important to me to at leastmake it to that date. but i feel drawn to end my life every second i keep breathing. it is very hard for me to wait.

how do you keep going? i could use a few tips. medications and therapy never helped me either

[wolfyx]

I used to think and talk about suicide a lot and carelessly throughout my whole adolescence and my university years. I used to philosophize around it a lot like the OP. Some of the things I was saying were well thought interesting and my friends were listening my monologues.

Then when we finish the University one of my best friends, that was way more balanced and organized and enthusiastic them me, the guy that was listening to me most while I was in my depressions committed suicide over a girl. And I felt like my discourses influenced his irreversible decision..

The feeling of guilt still eats me even now after almost 5 years. I cannot face his parents (he was only child) and I can never get over it. From that moment on I stopped talking about suicide.

My friend’s suicide was a wakeup call. What’s the point? You will die anyway in around 50 years that will pass in a heartbeat. You might as well LIVE the time that is given to you here.

I am not religious and I think that this life is all we have. Have sex, read books, experience things or sacrifice yourself for a higher cause if you are still unhappy. Throwing away for nothing the time that you have as a conscious entity is a waste…

[Oros Ull]

ENIT how do you feel about volcanos?

[ENIT]

Originally Posted by o7xx12 To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

i wish there was something i could say that would disprove your reasoning to end your life based on the fact you are unable to be happy. im very unhappy as well and have set a well thought out date to end my own life.this is mostly due to trying very hard to become independent and needed for 'something', but nothing ive engaged in ever grew into anything fruitful. my military career got ruined because i was raped, held against my will for 2 days in a storage room, and then when they found me, after a week in the hospital they decided to send me to a psychiatric facility. they 'forgot' about me for 3 months -- when i demanded to be let out of there they medically discharged me from the military. on my own i would have died. my then 'boy friend' decided he wanted to help me (he was older and "wiser" i thought ... i was 20 -- while having landed in another psych facility for trying to hang myself, he asked me to marry him.I had no one else, and in hopes of finding happiness i said yes. 2 yrs later he tried to kill me. he was tired of all my mental issues and got angry one night after drinking (we were at the beach) and after i went into the water to throw up he followed me and pushed me in and held me under. he did change his mind after a minute or 2 and told me "you are not worth it" and walked out of the water leaving me there. well we divorced and i moved away from everyone -- no friends or family (they were all toxic people anyway). i decided school was what i needed. i proceded to earn a degree, and then another degree ... but throughout a 6 year time frame no one would hire me -- i had 'student jobs' that paid very little, but nothing career making. so military, marriage, school ... what next? im so unhappy i could die... i want to die... i yearn for death so much i fantasize about it all the time. i am a drain on my country, i am a waste of space and financial support that the VA benefits covers me with. i do not hatemyself -- i feel like i have done everything and anything to seek out a way to be a useful citizen but nothing has sprouted into anything that even resembles having been a positive influence on the world around me. i wish more than anything that no one ever felt as unhappy as i feel.but i would be a giant hypicrite if i tried talking anyone out of ending their life. im sorry you feel the way you do. i have a few weeks left of life because i am committed to the date i have set for myself -- it is important to me to at leastmake it to that date. but i feel drawn to end my life every second i keep breathing. it is very hard for me to wait. how do you keep going? i could use a few tips. medications and therapy never helped me either

Honestly? I think I keep going because my life is extraordinarily easy. It's easier to brainlessly trudge through one more day than it is to muster up the resolve to put an end to it. Path of least resistance and all that.

I don't really "keep going". I'm just not dead yet.

As far as those things you seemed to want - marriage and a career at least - it's not as if like you're incapable of getting those things back. But that's a raw deal that you've gotten and you have my utmost sympathy.

[ENIT]

Originally Posted by wolfyx To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

used to think and talk about suicide a lot and carelessly throughout my whole adolescence and my university years. I used to philosophize around it a lot like the OP. Some of the things I was saying were well thought interesting and my friends were listening my monologues. Then when we finish the University one of my best friends, that was way more balanced and organized and enthusiastic them me, the guy that was listening to me most while I was in my depressions committed suicide over a girl. And I felt like my discourses influenced his irreversible decision..

That's like telling your friend "I'm gonna kick your ass" and feeling responsible when he's arrested for assault.

	Originally Posted by wolfyx To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	My friend’s suicide was a wakeup call. What’s the point? You will die anyway in around 50 years that will pass in a heartbeat. You might as well LIVE the time that is given to you here.

Why?

	Originally Posted by wolfyx To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	I am not religious and I think that this life is all we have. Have sex, read books, experience things or sacrifice yourself for a higher cause if you are still unhappy. Throwing away for nothing the time that you have as a conscious entity is a waste…

A waste of what?

[nowt]

Which reminds me: Why do you like pity?

	Originally Posted by ENIT To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	my utmost sympathy.

[ENIT]

Still don't know what you're on about with the pity thing, chief.

[nowt]

No? You were unable to follow the first time thru?--

Pity.

	Originally Posted by ENIT To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	Still don't know what you're on about with the pity thing, chief.

[ENIT]

	Originally Posted by nowt To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	No? You were unable to follow the first time thru?-- Pity.

Sounds good, bro.

[nowt]

Here's a refresher, since thoughts of suicide tend to make one... sluggish--

	Originally Posted by nowt
	Hm? This whole thread relies upon the "feeling of sympathy and sorrow for the misfortunes of others" and "the humane quality of understanding the suffering of others and wanting to do something about it"--

	Originally Posted by ENIT
	What?

	Originally Posted by nowt
	You're implicitly looking for pity. Why do you like pity?

	Originally Posted by ENIT To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	Sounds good, bro.

Why does it sound good; why do you like pity?

[ENIT]

If you find my situation a pitiable one, that's your own issue. I didn't ask for anybody to feel bad for me.

I've got a problem. I'm looking at my options for fixing it.

[wolfyx]

	Originally Posted by ENIT To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	Why?

Because you are alive for an instant and you are dead for eternity afterwards.

	Originally Posted by ENIT To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	A waste of what?

A waste of all the experiences that this instant of life (at the scale of the Universe) may allow you to have.

[ENIT]

Wolfy, you're not answering my question.

What will you have after you die that I would be without?

[nowt]

Pity. You're asking for pity. I did provide a relevant definition. Did you miss that, too? No surprise, there [sluggish, i know], but here it is again: The humane quality of understanding the suffering of others and wanting to do something about it. One might suppose you have the "problem" -for- the pity--

	Originally Posted by ENIT To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	If you find my situation a pitiable one, that's your own issue. I didn't ask for anybody to feel bad for me. I've got a problem. I'm looking at my options for fixing it.

My suggestion, is to quit looking for pity. Unless you just can't help yourself, liking it so much--

Why do you like it so much, again?

[ENIT]

Originally Posted by nowt To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

Pity. You're asking for pity. I did provide a relevant definition. Did you miss that, too? No surprise, there [sluggish, i know], but here it is again: The humane quality of understanding the suffering of others and wanting to do something about it. One might suppose you have the "problem" -for- the pity-- My suggestion, is to quit looking for pity. Unless you just can't help yourself, liking it so much-- Why do you like it so much, again?

If you're going to continue to ignore what I say while asking leading questions, why should I talk to you?

[nowt]

Leading? It's obviously pity. Why, you've just admitted to it. You've a problem, and are looking for options from people who would otherwise not give a fuck, and don't give much of one now, but you'll take what pity you can get, won't you?--

	Originally Posted by ENIT To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	If you're going to continue to ignore what I say while asking leading questions, why should I talk to you?

Why do you like pity so much?

[ENIT]

Yawn.

[wolfyx]

	Originally Posted by ENIT To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
	Wolfy, you're not answering my question. What will you have after you die that I would be without?

Life experiences. This is all you can have and this is why you are alive.

We are insignificant and in the grand scheme of things your existence is meaningless.

One of the things that helped me when I was depressed it was to watch documentaries about the Universe, the Big Bang and Theory of Everything . It helped me see all my "big problems" in a much more relative light, to see them truly insignificant.

It the end if everything is so meaningless, you can just decide to enjoy the moment and feel happier.