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I appreciate and adore your honesty, so thank you... This type of direct perspective is exactly what I was hoping for.
You've helped me understand him a bit better, and while I'm still a bit confused, I agree with you that I need to be more ballsy and take the initiative. I haven't wanted to put myself out there and be rejected, but what do I really have to lose?
It was removed by the mods for "no content". And they're right, if I had added to it, it would have stayed.
How best to put this now... Hiccup is the INTJ, while Toothless is the NF. "to fly" is the relationship, while "your crown" is the job/career. The problem is on many fronts; think "battlefield" here. His job isn't stable "as yet", INTJ's are rather anal about such things, if we're not stable, we're not good enough, and if we're not good enough, we must work harder to get good enough; coupled with us being our own toughest critics, it becomes a vicious cycle of never achieving the end game. INTJ's are called robots because we don't feel; it's a vicious lie, we feel quite profoundly, we just don't show it, that whole "never let'm see you sweat" cliche.
We spend our lives looking for that "perfect one" to add to our lives. Is it any wonder we get scared of commitment, when we feel we are not yet perfect ourselves? We will never be perfect, we can never be perfect; we know this, but it doesn't stop us, we feel our mate deserves perfection. How do you get past this OCD, make it clear you're not perfect either; show him your wisdom teeth (or lack thereof), just having to look in your yap...
If you haven't had sex with him yet, then do so. If he's anything like me, he needs to be raped; it's not a matter of not wanting to, but rather, not knowing or realizing who's move is next, and what to do with said initiative. It's a shitty deal, I agree; what with the whole "men should initiate and women should play hard to get" crap, but INTJ's are afraid to share feels of any sort.
The ball's in your court. If he didn't want to continue, you would have just plain lost contact with him; he's still there.
Hi there - you had posted a video as a reply to my posting about difficulty with an INTJ guy, but then the video link was deleted (by you I assume?) I was able to view it before it disappeared and wanted to ask you to explain why that video represented your answer to my question -- I resonated with it, but wanted your opinion too! Thanks