Same People, new relationship?

[muguly]

Is it possible that two people who broke up from a bad relationship with each other can have a successful relationship in the future?

[ScurvyRose]

No. Tried it, even 10 years later. Still had all the same issues, just much less patience. We were even engaged the first time, and the second time the first 6 months were good, but the next year was horrible.

Never go back. People are who they are. The vocabulary, maturity level, and responsibilities may change, just not how the two of you interact and what you want out of life. Those are fundamentals.

[Sequoia]

Anything's possible. But unless both people have gone through some serious interpersonal growth, it is highly unlikely. The issues that caused the relationship to break up in the first place would still be there.

[xtremegeek]

Anything is possible with forgiveness and learning from past mistakes.

[ElstonGunn]

Sure, why not? But it depends on what caused the original relationship to fail, and how stubborn the people involved are.

[DrEast]

Possible, yes. Recommended, no. If you're tempted, I'd recommend further emotional damage control instead of attempting to regain past intimacy. On-again, off-again is a dead-end road.

[Josh]

If it ended because of circumstances i.e. moving or things like that, than sure. If it ended because it didn't work out then no. As scurvyrose said people do change but when it comes to interacting people's mindset will often regress to what it was, when placed in a sitation from the past.

[changos]

A bad relationship leaves footprints of intense feelings, people might want to experience that intensity again. Also, the damage from the bad relationship might cause stress while trying to believe in the relationship again.

As far as I can remember, from a newspaper article, the brain tends to identify primitively the person as the cause of suffering, so the sole image of the person might cause stress.

But yet again, only each people knows what they feel, they might as well try with new energy and new ideas (and new maturity) to fulfill what previously failed. (if we take for granted that they are two different persons who actually experienced some growing inside)

[Gareth154]

Yes, definitely, if both parties are prepared to undergo lobotomies and extensive plastic surgery.

Lobotomies could address the intellectual and emotional failings which caused the break up in the first place, from the inside.

Extensive plastic surgery could prevent each party from recognising the other and hence repress the desire to hold back for fear of failure in this new relationship (possibly due the usual bad memories/negative emotional residue associated with a break up)

It is only once both parties meet again, in a blissful state of ignorance and altered physical beauty, that they can both aspire to true love, at last, with the same old flame.

Yes!Ladies and gentlemen, people can definitely change!!!!

Seriously:

However is it really worth it? Usually though, regular folk, without the means nor drive to undergo all this, don't change. They simply evolve. What this means is the reasons for a break need to be clear. Fundamental differences in values, outlook etc cannot generally be resolved.

[Josh]

That sums it up well, if you broke up in the first place there is clearly some intrinsic quality they have which you dislike. It's been my experience that people get nostalgic about that time in their lives and how it made them feel, rather than the person themselves.

[energy]

Hmmm, I have a friend who's about to remarry her ex-husband . . . something about the devil you know versus the one you don't.

[Colette]

Is it possible that two people who broke up from a bad relationship with each other can have a successful relationship in the future?

I've tried it too, and no I don't believe it's possible. As Buddha said you can never jump into the same river twice :)