View Full Version : Just killing time between serious post game.
Nihilum
01-03-2009, 06:13 PM
Q: How much rope did he use to hang himself? (That was dark.)
A: Piece of gravel
Zzyber
01-03-2009, 06:14 PM
Q. What did they find embedded in his eye when they pulled him down?
A. The bat wing.
Nihilum
01-03-2009, 06:15 PM
Q: What did he make his leather gloves out of?
A: Crapper
Zzyber
01-03-2009, 06:20 PM
Q. Where did he see his life having gone?
A. At 10000 feet.
Nikita
01-03-2009, 06:27 PM
Q: At what height does a non-rational mind stop functioning?
A: Wired.
Zzyber
01-03-2009, 06:32 PM
Q. What was the word used to describe him just before he caught fire?
A. The people who have the day off already know.
Nihilum
01-03-2009, 07:01 PM
Q: Did we have the day off?
A: Cow.
Nikita
01-03-2009, 07:12 PM
Q: What animal did little Timmy get to witness being turned into hamburgers at the factory last night before he went into shock?
A: A fire in the gallows.
Zzyber
01-03-2009, 09:22 PM
Q. What gave the swingers sweet release minutes before the lever was pulled?
A. 10,000 days.
Nihilum
01-03-2009, 10:59 PM
What was the name of that spoof for Saving Abel's "18 Days"?
Echoplex
ClydeB
01-03-2009, 11:08 PM
Q. Can you touch your knees together?
A. Only if you use the ThighMaster
Zzyber
01-03-2009, 11:10 PM
Q. Will you ever be able to quote Pi to 100 places?
A. The semi jackknifed.
Nihilum
01-03-2009, 11:49 PM
Q: What type of dive was that?
A: some sort of bug.
Zzyber
01-03-2009, 11:53 PM
Q. What just flew out of your nose?
A. The meter maid.
Nihilum
01-03-2009, 11:55 PM
Q: What makes the parking meter work?
A: stone
rwyatt365
01-04-2009, 07:03 AM
Q: What did your SO hit you with when you gave him/her that lame present?
A: The Sims
Q: What computer game uses sampling from the teacher in "Peanuts" for the dialogue of its characters.
A: 8-track
altoid
01-04-2009, 11:11 AM
Q: What is the soon-to-be new currency for the United States?
A: Vowels
PHS Philip
01-04-2009, 01:35 PM
Q: What caused communism?
A: President Taft and Henry VIII
rwyatt365
01-04-2009, 05:11 PM
Q: Name twp people who's contribution to humanity would have been greater had they had careers are used car salesmen?
A: My Aunt Doris' socks.
Nihilum
01-04-2009, 05:40 PM
Q: What did you smell this morning?
A: Cream Soda
Nikita
01-04-2009, 05:45 PM
Q: What kind of soda is served by members of Project Mayhem?
A: Lactate.
Reganon
01-04-2009, 05:53 PM
What does Nikita eat for breakfast?
small children
rwyatt365
01-04-2009, 05:55 PM
Q: Who are the first to suffer when morbidly obese people sit down?
A: A night at the opera.
Nikita
01-04-2009, 06:09 PM
Q: Where did rwyatt's wife catch him with his boyfriend?
A: Fickle friends and friendly foes.
Wapiti
01-04-2009, 06:27 PM
Q: If you had to make a 5 word sentence and 4 of the words had to start with the letter F and you had to use the word "and" as the fifth word, what would you write?
A: Sour cream and onion.
Nikita
01-04-2009, 06:47 PM
Q: What do men taste like, if you know what I mean?
A: Santa Clause. (that is not a typo)
Zzyber
01-04-2009, 07:52 PM
Q. Who has to continually explain that this is indeed how he spells his name?
A. The satellites are unreliable.
rwyatt365
01-05-2009, 04:40 AM
Q: Why is it that your $600 smartphone can't get a signal, while your friend's $19 GoPhone can.
A: To pay bills.
Harmony
01-05-2009, 10:08 AM
Q. Why he robbed the 7/11?
A. The blind rooster
altoid
01-05-2009, 10:14 AM
Q: What happens when poultry masturbate too much?
A: A caffeine buzz.
Zzyber
01-05-2009, 02:08 PM
Q. What does a red bull get when it drinks its own urine?
A. He had no motivation.
Allie
01-05-2009, 08:32 PM
Why has he not showered in 6 months?!?
A: The hand that rocks the cradle
Q - What's the name of that mediocre movie that Curtis Hanson directed in 1992.
A - Chitlins
Wapiti
01-06-2009, 07:28 AM
Q: What is the grand prize of this years redneck intjf lawnmower races.
A: Porthole.
Harmony
01-06-2009, 07:45 AM
Q. Where the monkey was able to gain access to the ship?
A. The giraffe and elephant
rwyatt365
01-06-2009, 08:00 AM
Q: Who was the monkey hiding from?
A: 4,000 gallons of vitamin water.
Harmony
01-06-2009, 08:05 AM
Q. How the health nut overdosed on vitamins?
A. Like, oh my God! No way!
Zzyber
01-06-2009, 08:27 AM
Q. What were the last words of Sam Houston?
A. Only when concerning you.
ClydeB
01-08-2009, 08:47 PM
Q. How much insect spray can you inhale before it hurts you?
A. Look at the pretty can in my hand.
Nikita
01-08-2009, 08:57 PM
Q: What did the Navy Seal say before blowing up the Commie?
A: Sing it, sista!
Zzyber
01-09-2009, 08:11 AM
Q. What was said following the soul singer falling before going on stage?
A. Because she told me to.
Harmony
01-09-2009, 11:21 AM
Q. Why did you run around the office doing the chicken dance?
A. Because the sauna was full.
Zzyber
01-09-2009, 11:53 AM
Q. Because all the old fat guys felt insecure and didn't want to leave the steam.
A. Oh yeah! That was on Sunday.
Wapiti
01-09-2009, 02:19 PM
Q: When was the last time you threw a fit in a candy store cause your mom wouldn't buy you what you wanted?
A: It jiggles like jello.
Zzyber
01-09-2009, 02:22 PM
Q. What happens to that dudes chins down there at the desk in the corner when he laughs?
A. No! Cold..damn cold!
Wapiti
01-09-2009, 02:29 PM
Q: Do you like to take warm or hot showers?
A: Intestinal fortitude.
Zzyber
01-09-2009, 04:29 PM
Q. What was Houdini lacking?
A. That's a bunch of bull! Their home!
Nikita
01-09-2009, 05:29 PM
Q: What did the butcher exclaim before telling the baker where to go?
A: Science is not a science.
ClydeB
01-09-2009, 05:55 PM
Q. What did the labia say to the foreskin?
A. You have hidden layers to you.
Zzyber
01-09-2009, 09:58 PM
Q. What is the new company motto of Jenny Craig?
A. Balderdash!
LionsPride
01-09-2009, 11:36 PM
Q. What do they call the Octogenarian Marathon?
A. Squirrel Pudding
Zzyber
01-12-2009, 08:09 AM
Q. What was left on the road after the motorcycle gang went down it?
A. The dark that follows.
Q - What is a shadow?
A - Mute
rwyatt365
01-12-2009, 09:19 AM
Q: What button would you most like to have installed on your co-workers?
A: Only after he fell down.
Zzyber
01-12-2009, 12:38 PM
Q. When did people finally notice the INTJ was in the room?
A. In the hallway.
ClydeB
01-12-2009, 05:03 PM
Q. Have you ever felt such comfy chairs?
A. No one expects the Spanish Inquisition!
Zzyber
01-12-2009, 05:35 PM
Q. What was the the battle cry of the Canadians when they invaded New Mexico?
A. You survived!
Nikita
01-12-2009, 06:19 PM
Q: What did Zzyber tell the reluctant hooker 30 seconds after he purchased her services?
A: Verisimilitude.
Zzyber
01-12-2009, 06:37 PM
Q. What does Nikita think that her above question is?
A. The intern did it.
Nikita
01-12-2009, 06:53 PM
Q: What did Pheeny say when her boss confronted her with xeroxed copies of buttocks?
A: For crying out loud!
Zzyber
01-12-2009, 06:58 PM
Q. What did Nikita say upon discovering that she had both male and female genitalia?
A. When I found out he was incompetent.
Nikita
01-12-2009, 06:59 PM
Q: When did I know Zzyber was an INTJ? :evil:
A: Press the flesh.
altoid
01-12-2009, 07:05 PM
Q: What is the worst pickup line ever?
A: The whole thing unraveled.
Nikita
01-12-2009, 07:06 PM
Q: What happened when the Fieldmarshal and the Mastermind pissed off the Guardians?
A: Narcolepsy.
Zzyber
01-12-2009, 07:08 PM
Q. What did I discover I had when surrounded by ENTP's?
A. The timing was not ideal.
Nikita
01-12-2009, 07:12 PM
Q: How does Zzyber rationalize the rejection of his marriage proposal?
A: Feelers.
Zzyber
01-12-2009, 07:13 PM
Q. What does Nikita apparently have to know that I was recently rejected with a marriage proposal. (YOU'VE GONE TOOOOOO FAR!!!!)
A. Dirty panties.
Nikita
01-12-2009, 07:24 PM
Q: What did the constipated marathon runner finish the race with after downing Kaopectate?
A: Innocent question.
Zzyber
01-12-2009, 07:26 PM
Q. What are not real?
A. Ok so I lied.
Nikita
01-12-2009, 07:38 PM
Q: What did Bill say to Hillary after his infamous speech?
A: Sick puppies.
Zzyber
01-12-2009, 07:39 PM
Q. What was the reason they shut down the Chinese border?
A. Mistrial!!!!
Nikita
01-12-2009, 07:40 PM
Q: What does the horny judge yell at her husband when he can't get it up?
A: Prefect.
Zzyber
01-12-2009, 07:42 PM
Q. Who are Nikita's favorite victims to abuse in a not so innocent manner?
A. That's why I told my brother.
Nikita
01-12-2009, 07:45 PM
Q: What did you do after freaking out upon finding your first hair there?
A: People in postal boxes shouldn't throw bones.
Zzyber
01-12-2009, 07:46 PM
Q. What would be an answer that Nikita would say to try and confuse Zzyber?
A. I did what I had to do.
Nikita
01-12-2009, 07:48 PM
Q: What did you claim when you didn't know anything at all?
A: Engage Ni.
Zzyber
01-12-2009, 07:49 PM
Q. What did the knights previously say?
A. I couldn't believe any more.
Nikita
01-12-2009, 07:53 PM
Q: What was the ultimate downfall of the Idealist?
A: Catch a falling car.
Zzyber
01-12-2009, 07:55 PM
Q. What did Galileo always dream about?
A. Last time!
Nikita
01-12-2009, 07:58 PM
Q: What did Wapiti say after an all-night marathon with a hole in a cactus?
A: Yonkers.
Zzyber
01-12-2009, 07:59 PM
Q. Where does Yakko live?
A. My cerebellum just exploded!!!!!
Nikita
01-12-2009, 08:00 PM
Q: What was the last thing Einstein thought before the theory of relativity finally clicked?
A: Life is about change.
Zzyber
01-12-2009, 08:01 PM
Q. What did the motivational speaker say seconds before he was shot by a guy in the audience?
A. Because you used your copious powers of persuasion.
Nikita
01-12-2009, 08:07 PM
Q: How was I able to manipulate the little old lady out of her life savings in front of a judge, her doting brother, and five police officers?
A: Cake.
Zzyber
01-12-2009, 08:09 PM
Q. What did the computer misleadingly offer as a prize?
A. Dude! That was his daughter!
Nikita
01-12-2009, 08:12 PM
Q: What did one brother say to the other brother about another brother after nailing the dime store squeeze?
A: Place of honor.
Zzyber
01-12-2009, 08:14 PM
Q. Where will Zzyber end up in when all is said and done?
A. The doctor will see you now.
Nikita
01-12-2009, 08:15 PM
Q: What did Zzyber hear shortly after uttering that last sentence to Nikita?
A: Dribble.
Zzyber
01-12-2009, 08:16 PM
Q. What did Nikita mistakenly call when she meant to say she has the drips?
A. We found out you are a compatible donor after all.
Nikita
01-12-2009, 08:21 PM
Q: What did the demented doctor say to Zzyber's mom after their date, and shortly before pulling out a butcher's knife?
A: Elementary, my dear Pottsdam.
Zzyber
01-12-2009, 08:23 PM
Q. What did Nikita say at the murder mystery play that she went to over the weekend.
A. I saw him last summer.
Nikita
01-12-2009, 08:36 PM
Q: How did you know what he did last summer?
A: Stake it UK!
Zzyber
01-12-2009, 08:39 PM
Q. What did Nikita always yell at the tv when Spike was about to kill a vampire?
A. This has been the best week I've had in a long time.
Nikita
01-12-2009, 09:24 PM
Q: What did Zzyber's coworkers say while he was on vacation?
A: Cha-ching!
Zzyber
01-12-2009, 09:31 PM
Q. What is the sound that Nikita makes every time she gets a new John.
A. You're an extraordinary human being.
Nikita
01-12-2009, 09:34 PM
Q: What did MacGuffin teach his pet parrot to say to him every morning?
A: Synadaggers.
Zzyber
01-12-2009, 09:35 PM
Q. What is the newest made up word that Nikita is trying to pass off as real?
A. That's why I'm getting him a parole hearing.
Allie
01-13-2009, 08:59 PM
Why is Zzyber still stuck behind bars after 50 years for "beating a dead horse to death"?!?
A: I've got you babe.
Nikita
01-13-2009, 09:24 PM
Q: What did Sonny say to Cher just before letting her "slip" through his fingers in the elevator shaft?
A: Pardon your baldness.
Wapiti
01-14-2009, 01:47 PM
Q: What would be the first words out of your mouth if you were to meet Montel Williams.
A: A can of soup and a screw driver.
Nikita
01-14-2009, 06:13 PM
Q: With what did the Great Santini make his new bride scream?
A: Peppers and peeps.
Zzyber
01-15-2009, 01:03 PM
Q. What was Houdini's last meal?
A. An American flag.
Harmony
01-15-2009, 01:07 PM
Q. What Kid Rock's favorite article of clothing is?
A. In the middle of the Bermuda Triangle.
Zzyber
01-15-2009, 01:09 PM
Q. What is the most intriguing mystery to offer mankind?
A. I just didn't leave a message.
Nikita
01-16-2009, 11:28 PM
Q: What did ghost try to scream at the officers investigating her mother for murder, though she had actually committed suicide?
A: The devil made me do it.
Q - Why did you go shopping at Wal-Mart?
A - Hello
Nikita
01-19-2009, 12:26 AM
Q: What will Billy Cosby be eating in the afterlife?
A: Factorials.
altoid
01-19-2009, 05:14 PM
Q: What describes the reproduction of stupid people?
A: A donut with sprinkles.
Nikita
01-19-2009, 08:29 PM
Q: What did the pervert call his wart-ridden anus?
A: Servant of the mod squad.
Zzyber
01-21-2009, 06:09 AM
Q. Who is Clare Danes?
A. Because the card no longer fit into the reader.
Harmony
01-21-2009, 06:23 AM
Q. Why I snapped and broke my ATM card into two pieces?
A. The stapler was jammed.
Q: Why is your research paper stuck together with Silly Putty?
A: A herd of tapirs was after me.
Zzyber
01-21-2009, 06:33 AM
Q. Why did I viciously attack the lady from accounting with my swingline?
A. It was a dream.
Wapiti
01-21-2009, 07:20 AM
Q: So tell me about all this time you've wasted on this online forum over the past year.
A: Marry had a little lamb.
Zzyber
01-21-2009, 08:12 AM
Q. Why was Mary so popular with those crazy boys?
A. The staff sell hotdogs.
rwyatt365
01-21-2009, 08:28 AM
Q: In the absence of a good Porterhouse, what is the next best option at your local steakhouse?
A: The top flies off.
Harmony
01-21-2009, 08:30 AM
Q. What happens when a girl in a bikini goes down a really fast water slide?
A. Caught snoozing on the job.
rwyatt365
01-21-2009, 08:32 AM
Q: Why can't I get a good referral from my previous place of employment?
A: Down the hall to the left.
Zzyber
01-21-2009, 08:41 AM
Q. Where are they hiding the euthanasia room?
A. A huge crash followed by a child screaming.
Wapiti
01-21-2009, 09:09 AM
Q: What happens when the steering goes out on the clowns VW at the circus and it runs into the crowd.
A: Butternut squash.
Zzyber
01-21-2009, 09:30 AM
Q. What do you get when you shove a stick of butter and a squash up an elephants bum?
A. The hidden face inside.
Q: What are you afraid to reveal to the world?
A: Because I hate pants.
Wapiti
01-21-2009, 09:58 AM
Q: Why do you wear skirts?
A: Tootie Fruity
Zzyber
01-21-2009, 11:20 AM
Q. What is rudyhenkel's new nickname?
A. The label fell off.
rwyatt365
01-21-2009, 12:53 PM
Q: What do you tell the security guard when he catches you with shoplifted items?
A: Sick to my stomach
Q: How do you feel when you look in a mirror?
A: Higher than a kite.
Wapiti
01-21-2009, 12:56 PM
Q: How do I feel when I look in the mirror?
A: 3 feet short.
Zzyber
01-21-2009, 01:26 PM
Q. What does a pessimist see when they look at a dwarf?
A. The clown died on the child's birthday cake.
Wapiti
01-21-2009, 01:31 PM
Q: What happened when a clown popped out of the cake and startled Chuck Norris on his 2nd birthday.
A: Fruity pebbles.
Zzyber
01-21-2009, 01:35 PM
Q. What goes pop in your mouth but doesn't leave a bad taste?
A. They were all out of Cinnimon Life.
Wapiti
01-21-2009, 02:56 PM
Q: Why was Mikey so pissed?
A: Without you.
rwyatt365
01-21-2009, 03:33 PM
Q: How are all of the rest of your friends going to have a good time?
A: And then there were 2.
Zzyber
01-22-2009, 08:28 AM
Q. During the process of elimination how many people were left when the sex olympics were done?
A. The stapeler didn't match the phone.
Q: Why did you throw your office supplies through the window?!
A: What can I say? I'm a stickler.
Zzyber
02-03-2009, 12:55 PM
Q. What did the cactus say to the foot?
A. It has lots of problems.
Wapiti
02-03-2009, 02:20 PM
Q: What's the deal with Zzyber's avatar? *huggles Zzyber's furry avatar*
A: Ham and swiss.
Why was the Bar Mitzvah kosher catering service fired?
Halitosis.
rwyatt365
02-04-2009, 04:33 AM
Q: What is the name of the unfortunate affliction affecting those people allergic to Halle Berry?
A: An empty bottle and three quarters.
zibber
02-04-2009, 04:35 AM
Q: What did Macgyver/Macgruber use to foil a terrorist scheme?
A: A whole lotta milk.
Wapiti
02-04-2009, 12:11 PM
Q: Besides sterilization, what does the lady who just have 8 kids need?
A: Turtle doves.
Q: Aside from inescapable seasonal music and decorations reminiscent of a one party state, what happens on the second day of Christmas?
A: Just one more good twist.
Nikita
02-04-2009, 04:29 PM
Q: What did the humanitarian serial killer decide was in order?
A: Over the moon and under Manhattan.
Q: How did the New York Subway operator feel when he was lighting up on the job?
A: It evens out in the end.
Nikita
02-04-2009, 07:11 PM
Q: What is the upside of male pattern baldness?
A: Plucky little duck.
Q: What nickname did Nikita give to the genitalia of her last love interest?
A: Profit!!
Nikita
02-04-2009, 07:39 PM
Q: What does RudyHenkel call his God?
A: Eternal jubilation.
Q: What does Nikita say to her victims, right before ending their life?
A: It's too hot!
Nikita
02-05-2009, 07:37 PM
Q: Why did the wimpy little God not give a damn that Satan claimed dominion over Hell?
A: Pedantic pederasty.
Q: What do you get when a young boy questions the typical ancient Grecian about philosophy?
A: It was blue before I got here!
Allie
02-05-2009, 09:23 PM
Who dyed great aunt Ethel's hair like this?
A: Running mate
Q: What is the method by which antelope reproduce on the dangerous savanna?
A: Because there's no way we can get ahold of that many rubber chickens.
rwyatt365
02-06-2009, 10:27 AM
Q: What did the circus clown say after declining to stuff something into Rush Limbaugh's mouth?
A: A little to the left, and down.
Zzyber
02-06-2009, 01:01 PM
Q. What were the last words of the original sculptor who worked on Washington's nose on Mount Rushmore?
A. Because she kissed him.
Nikita
02-06-2009, 05:29 PM
Q: Why did he cry in gratitude?
A: There are 6 windows.
Q: What are among the ten worst operating systems ever made?
A: It will have to be redone.
Nikita
02-07-2009, 01:18 PM
Q: What did God say after creating a man and seeing the obvious flaws?
A: A cup of Joe the Plumber.
Q: What holds coffee, but doesn't actually exist?
A: Nobody knows.
probity
02-07-2009, 11:15 PM
Q: Just how easy is 'easy as pie'?
A: Muffin basket.
Q: What does the Muffin Man call his wife in bed?
A: What is the purpose of eye colors?
Nikita
02-09-2009, 03:45 PM
(you're supposed to give the answer not the question!)
Q: What was the question asked by the little boy that never learned to think properly?
A: Hyacinth marshmallows.
Q: What's the greatest gift a woman could get on Valentine's Day?
A: Pippi Longstocking
Nikita
02-10-2009, 05:00 PM
Q: What is not a present you want Santa leaving hanging on the hearth?
A: Green steam.
Allie
02-10-2009, 06:30 PM
What do you call the sauna business going green?
A: Cloud computing.
Nikita
02-10-2009, 06:36 PM
Q: What is an INTP's programming style?
A: Highlighting the bible.
Q: What's the best way to amuse yourself when you're bored, and looking for something to laugh at?
A: Does Diet Dr. Pepper taste more like regular Dr. Pepper?
Wapiti
02-11-2009, 07:25 AM
Q: If you had to use "Dr. Pepper" twice in one sentence, what would you write?
A: Jellyfish heaven.
Harmony
02-11-2009, 08:16 AM
Q. What is the Peanut Butter Gates?
A. Leggo my Eggo
Wapiti
02-11-2009, 08:38 AM
Q: The last time someone grabbed my avy I said what?
A: Toothpick legs.
Q: What is the distinguishing characteristic of most runway supermodels?
A: A feather in his cap.
rwyatt365
02-11-2009, 08:55 AM
Q: What did you say to the [insert derogatory reference here] after they inserted a quill in a mound of elephant dung?
A: And then it rained.
Q: What line is guaranteed to be in any poem or short story written by a goth teenager?
A: For the nookie.
Wapiti
02-11-2009, 09:18 AM
Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: Vernors and whip cream.
rwyatt365
02-11-2009, 09:30 AM
Q: What do Detroiters use to prepare for a Lions game?
A: He went ice fishing.
Wapiti
02-11-2009, 09:41 AM
Q: Why did the chicken cross back over the thread after said nookie?
A: Watermelon and vodka.
rwyatt365
02-11-2009, 10:21 AM
Q: What are two things that should never be mixed together?
A: May 14th.
Wapiti
02-11-2009, 11:46 AM
Q: When does summer end and hell begin where I live?
A: Ballerina and a banana.
Q: If Disney got into porno, what would their first release be named?
A: Because I said so!
Wapiti
02-11-2009, 02:52 PM
Q: Why do pickles exist?
A: Spatial vastness
Q: What lay in the heads of most ESFPs?
A: Corn on the Cob.
Sequoia
02-11-2009, 05:28 PM
Q: What do you serve with crow?
A: Orange sunshine
Q: If the earth starting hurtling away from the sun at tremendous speeds, what would occur as a result of red shift?
A: Harry Potter Cosplay
Allie
02-11-2009, 08:40 PM
What is the rock band played by hairy potters called?
A: Ad hoc
Nikita
02-11-2009, 08:45 PM
Q: How do you make a loogey feel less lonely?
A: Surfer chimp.
Q: What is the greatest movie concept ever developed?
A: Five by five.
Harmony
02-12-2009, 07:11 AM
Q: What is the size of my cubicle?
A: A water balloon fight
Wapiti
02-12-2009, 08:31 AM
Q: What can we no longer do at work after that last "incident."
A: Tuber and spaghetti.
Q: What would be a good name for an Italian brass band?
A: Time for trouble.
Wapiti
02-12-2009, 10:29 AM
Q: What's always overheard being whispered from the security officers as you enter work each morning?
A: Salt and vinegar.
Harmony
02-12-2009, 10:46 AM
Q. What is your favorite flavor of potato chips?
A. She smelled like a grandma.
Wapiti
02-12-2009, 12:35 PM
Q: What did the lion smell like after eating grandma?
A: Foundry furnace.
Sequoia
02-12-2009, 05:09 PM
Q: Where are rare mediums roasted well done?
A: A proxy blizzard.
Nikita
02-12-2009, 08:54 PM
Q: What stood in for the hurricane when El Niņo was sent to his room?
A: Caramel corpuscles.
rahdam
02-12-2009, 09:49 PM
Q: What did you have for breakfast today?
A: Birdman
Nikita
02-12-2009, 09:50 PM
Q: What was your nickname after the kids in school saw your legs?
A: Sawdust.
rahdam
02-12-2009, 09:56 PM
What was the allure of Saw V?
You've already HAD your snack!
Nikita
02-12-2009, 09:58 PM
Q: What did rahdam tell the Ethiopian child who ate an entire bowl of grain 3 days ago?
A: A similar suicide.
rahdam
02-12-2009, 10:01 PM
Q: What did Nikita want when she heard about the following: Wearing only swim trunks and sneakers, a 37-year-old man raced his motorcycle toward the Manasota Key drawbridge. As the bridge began to open, it was clear that he intended to "shoot the gap." Bridge designers had anticipated such lunacy and invented the crossing guard. The closing gates swept him off his Suzuki, over the side of the bridge, into the water, and out of the gene pool. By a twist of fate the motorcycle continued up the ramp and made it across to the other side.
Hella.
Nikita
02-12-2009, 10:04 PM
Q: What did rahdam say when asked to what degree he thought all dogs deserved to die?
A: Camera stalking.
rahdam
02-12-2009, 10:05 PM
Q: What the fuck are you doing outside my window?
A: Get the fuck outta here.
Nikita
02-12-2009, 10:08 PM
Q: What did the sorority girls say to the INTJ who wandered into their locker room?
A: Go cat go.
rahdam
02-12-2009, 10:10 PM
Q: What's the ThunderKatz motto?
A: Hakuna Matata.
Sequoia
02-14-2009, 09:20 PM
Q: What do Hawaiian natives chant before they pounce?
A: Because it's raining coconuts
Nikita
02-14-2009, 10:44 PM
Q: Why did the plastic surgeon lose business?
A: Candy and smut.
ranwayslo
02-16-2009, 10:45 PM
Q: Name two other things within easy reach of my recliner?
A: The batteries were dead.
rwyatt365
02-17-2009, 09:21 AM
Q: Why did your partner run crying from your home last night?
A: Then the pig turned green.
Wapiti
02-17-2009, 10:34 AM
Q: I fed the pig some poison and.....
A: Hercules and a donkey.
Sequoia
02-17-2009, 01:21 PM
Q: What was that rumor flying around town about?
A: That's the biggest drama queen in the known worlds.
Wapiti
02-17-2009, 01:27 PM
Q: Who is Synamon?
A: Crunchy toast.
Sequoia
02-17-2009, 02:58 PM
Q: What is in cinnamon? And Synamon?
A: Accelerating time.
Nikita
02-19-2009, 01:31 PM
Q: What is the bane of every man's hairline?
A: Snuff it.
Wapiti
02-19-2009, 01:47 PM
Q: How can you help control the kitty population?
A: Hostility and distance.
Sequoia
02-19-2009, 05:08 PM
Q: How do you deal with the cat hating population?
A: By turning it into meat!
Mathnerdkid
02-20-2009, 02:36 AM
Q: How did my pet dust bunny deal with the thread-attacking cats?
A: Infinity ended.
Jonathan Brewer
02-20-2009, 02:41 AM
Q: What is the square root of apricot?
A: Fungi.
Q - Who/what is always the life of the party?
A - L-Tyrosine
Wapiti
02-20-2009, 07:36 AM
Q: Can you name something that starts with "L-"
A: The door.
Sequoia
02-20-2009, 02:32 PM
Q: Holy cr*p! What just fell down?
A: A river ran over it.
Q - How did that dirt turn into mud?
A - Pineal gland.
Sequoia
03-09-2009, 02:45 PM
Q: What is the last question on that exam about?
A: It's happily nestled deep in those woods.
Q: Where is the gnome I was looking for?
A: The positive aspect of negative thinking.
Sequoia
03-09-2009, 05:03 PM
Q: How do you avoid false hopes?
A: The Horsehead Nebula
Jonathan Brewer
03-09-2009, 07:08 PM
Q. What happens when astronomers drink too much?
A. Unbearably conventional and yet undeniably attractive.
Sequoia
03-09-2009, 07:40 PM
Q: How do you find teenyboppers?
A: The perfect solution to rainy day blues.
Jonathan Brewer
03-09-2009, 07:44 PM
Q. What is polka music?
A. Eduardo, Emil, and Franz Dudley.
Sequoia
03-09-2009, 07:45 PM
Q: Name some famous Canadians
A: Because I said so!
Jonathan Brewer
03-09-2009, 07:49 PM
Q. Why should I?
A. Chili dogs mostly, and a few tater tots.
Sequoia
03-09-2009, 07:55 PM
Q: What would you want for a final meal?
A: Organic 65% cocao chocolate.
Jonathan Brewer
03-09-2009, 08:15 PM
Q. What goes into an absolutely terrible drink?
A. It burns just slightly but not enough to bother taking antibiotics.
Sequoia
03-10-2009, 07:41 PM
Q: How does that awful looking rash feel?
A: All that time just disappeared!
Nikita
03-10-2009, 07:52 PM
Q: What happened when you signed onto INTJf?
A: Snackpack
Reganon
03-10-2009, 08:16 PM
Q: What does Nikita eat for breakfast, lunch, and dinner?
A: yellow crayons
Sequoia
03-10-2009, 08:19 PM
Q: What is that sticky yellow gooey mess all over the kitchen floor?
A: Hot spicy sweet potato fries.
Reganon
03-10-2009, 08:25 PM
Q: What critical food group are most people deprived of?
A: sand
Sequoia
03-10-2009, 08:27 PM
Q: What is that bland noncolor they keep painting whole housing subdivisions with?
A: Well, it's a bit quirky.
Jonathan Brewer
03-10-2009, 08:53 PM
Q. What is sex with an INTJ like?
A. 44
callmemigs
03-11-2009, 05:34 PM
Q: What is the most erotic mathematical equation?
A: (0)(0) c===3
Sequoia
03-11-2009, 06:01 PM
Q: What do young men think about in high school math class?
A: Because it really feels luscious.
Bobert
03-11-2009, 06:38 PM
Q. Why do you put chocolate syrup on your body?
A. You get sand in there.
Sequoia
03-11-2009, 06:44 PM
Q: What happens when you play tickle on the beach?
A: That's the sound a hummingbird makes.
callmemigs
03-11-2009, 07:19 PM
Q: What is a palindrome?
A: The "Vote For Sarah Palin" Syndrome
Sequoia
03-11-2009, 08:14 PM
Q: What is foot in mouth tendency called?
A: It's the secret ingredient of those brownies.
callmemigs
03-11-2009, 08:23 PM
Q: What is a gay?
A: A term to define a straight who is always happy.
Bobert
03-11-2009, 08:31 PM
Q. What is flighty?
A. A little bit bumpy.
Jonathan Brewer
03-11-2009, 08:33 PM
Q. What does a thirteen year old's face feel like?
A. Grade "A", Number 1
Nikita
03-11-2009, 08:41 PM
Q: How did the perverted professor decide which student to date?
A: The Entertainment Committee
Bobert
03-11-2009, 08:44 PM
Q. Why are the Mormons so popular?
A. The White House.
Nikita
03-11-2009, 08:48 PM
Q: What is the name of a very naughty website?
A: Tusks for trysts
altoid
03-11-2009, 08:50 PM
Q: What is Nikita's favorite "charity"?
A: Container houses
Nikita
03-11-2009, 08:51 PM
Q: What do INTJs prefer to call their asylum dormitories?
A: Folds of a lampshade
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