What Chore Fairy Do You Need?

[Moxiie]

What is your least favorite chore and how do you put off or get out of doing it?

I'll start:

I hate doing laundry more than anything in the world. I will put it off until I literally have no clean clothing left to wear, then put it off some more until the semi-dirty clothing is too dirty to wear. Then I will take ALL of it to the laundromat so I only have to do it one trip of like 15 loads.

I hate it so much that I will sometimes just buy new clothing to avoid doing it.

I need a laundry fairy

[storm eyes]

I hate mowing the lawn.

I only learned last year and it was awful. I used to make patterns around my trees so the neighbours would pray I would be in no rush to do it again. I know that sounds pampered... but really, why would I learn? It is not something that ever interested me and it is not like it is some kind of survival skill that I would need in the imminent future. I have been told by friends and family that it is useful to be practical. So I practically ran to the phone this year to order the lawn service.

I have a lawn mowing fairy. I like him a lot :nice:

[davai]

Mowing the lawn is like hoovering, I don't see it as something you can really get wrong or have to learn.

Anyway, fuck ironing.

[storm eyes]

Mowing the lawn is like hoovering, I don't see it as something you can really get wrong or have to learn.

Anyway, fuck ironing.

:faint: oh no davai, I had never used a lawn mower, paid attention to a lawn mower, had any cause to having anything to do with a lawn mower, as crazy as this may sound, I did not even know I had to put gas in it or how to for that matter.

[Oros Ull]

Work… I wish I had a slave fairy to go partake in the rat race for me while I do more constructive things. I hate having to make money…

PS. I always had to use a push mower… :irked:

[Tequila]

Cooking!
I do enjoy cooking but... too time consuming. Hunting for recipies, grocery shopping, preparations, cleaning up. Especially whenever I am sick, I would love to be pampered for a change by someone who can whip up a nourishing meal while I can recover in peace.

[Person056]

I hate doing any chores but if I just get in the mindset of "just do it" then I really don't mind and the whole process is painless. That being said, i'd like a fairy that does it all, out of the goodness of their heart, because they love taking care of people

An ISFJ fairy! ;D

(P.S. any of you ISFJs lurking here, I mean no offense. I really admire you all :) )

[davai]

(P.S. any of you ISFJs lurking here, I mean no offense. I really admire you all :) )

Fuck that, ISFJs should be bred on farms to do these chores.

[Person056]

Fuck that, ISFJs should be bred on farms to do these chores.

Having feelings ruins all the fun :(. I actually know an ISFJ here that does work on a farm so I will hold my tongue, no matter how tempted I am to slip for comedy's sake.

...though between you and me, I agree ;)

[plotthickens]

Pick one. Any one. Please.

Scything fairy.
Painting fairy.
Transplanting fairy.
Retaining wall fairy.
Contractor for the New Sitting Room fairy.
Housework fairy.
Orchard fairy.
Permaculture fairy.
Native garden fairy.
Demolition fairy.
Bug Patrol fairy.
Pool Cleaning fairy.
Chicken fairy.
Shopping fairy.
House Improvement fairy.

It's not that I don't like doing these things, it's that there's SO FUCKING MANY OF THEM TO DO. I'd love to have any of these fairies, please, especially #5.

[Lilie]

Cooking fairy. A daily chore that can only be avoided to the detriment of your health. (Or wallet.)

If I can't have that one because it's already taken, I want a telephone fairy to make all my calls.

[deckard]

Anything but fixing. I'm good at fixing and enjoy that part.

[mieu]

Take My Car to the Mechanic Fairy

or maybe just Personal Mechanic Fairy

[Nostalgia]

Dusting Fairy, fucking dusting is so tedious, I hate dust, it is everywhere, on fucking everything!

I can do everything else, cooking, washing, general house maintenance. If I don't know how to do it, I will just learn it by looking it up on the internet, it is so cool!

BUT FUCK DUSTING!

[hi5yourface]

I HATE folding laundry, gah!

[Booko]

Right now a TAX FAIRY would be wonderful.

If I could find one that didn't miss deductions. Hell, I haven't even found a Certified Public Asshole that doesn't miss stuff. So I do them myself.

Other than that a VACUUM fairy would be nice.
And a TRASH fairy.

---------- Post added 04-14-2012 at 06:57 PM ----------

Dusting Fairy, fucking dusting is so tedious, I hate dust, it is everywhere, on fucking everything!

My solution to this problem is to clutter all flat surfaces up so you don't notice the dust, and for the few that remain leave it to the cat to sit on the table and dust it for me.

[Nostalgia]

^Not bad ideas.....Cats can also be self cleaning duster....
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[blm9161]

I need a landscape fairy to finish my yard so I don't have to.

[Kricket]

I want a tile scrubber fairy. It'd even be okay if it just did grout. 80% of my house is tiled with big, thick, light grout which gets dirty ten seconds after I scrub it.

I don't iron so that is not even on the list. If clothing needs to be ironed, Mr. K does it or it doesn't get done. End of story.

[Rachel45]

I possess no "domestic genes".

Especially when it concerns the laundry and dishes.

Currently, I have three baskets of clean laundry that I grab stuff from; cannot seem to be bothered putting it away. I have an attitude toward my clothes that is similar to a guy or a fourteen year old girl...I grab whatever is clean and proceed to throw my shit everywhere.

I hate doing the dishes. I can let them pile up a bit and not care in the least.

Yep. Need a laundry and dishes chore fairy.

[CaelestisPeste]

Taking lecture notes fairy. Are there a warranties on fairies?

[Selene]

Any fairy willing to iron my clothes would do. Hate ironing. It's the biggest waste of valuable time Zzz...

[KelvinDjangoTeo]

Any fairy willing to iron my clothes would do. Hate ironing. It's the biggest waste of valuable time Zzz...

Why! I love to iron clothes, especially wearing my clothes while it's hot. Idk why but it's a pleasant routine every morning.

[Selene]

Why! I love to iron clothes, especially wearing my clothes while it's hot. Idk why but it's a pleasant routine every morning.

I find ironing so dreadfully repetitive that it can only be justified with other distractions like watching the TV haha. Then time spent doing it can be written off with some recreational/entertainment value.

[KelvinDjangoTeo]

I find ironing so dreadfully repetitive that it can only be justified with other distractions like watching the TV haha. Then time spent doing it can be written off with some recreational/entertainment value.

I feel independent doing it, it requires skill. I would really want to iron like this dude:

Garra Style - Ironing.
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[Distance]

A sleep fairy. Such a waste of time.

[KelvinDjangoTeo]

Health fairy. Taking care of my health is a chore. I will eat whatever I want! I will still be healthier than anyone else on earth. Of course, I will still exercise just because I enjoy it.

[Pingo]

I need a dishes fairy and an essay writing fairy.

[pironiro]

- shopping fairy
- bureaucracy errand fairy
- bathroom/kitchen cleaning fairy
- dust wiping fairy

I'd murder all of you in exchange for any of these.

[dontmesswithme]

I need the Everything Fairy. I've been wishing for a pet alien for years.

[deconspire]

I thought this is what mail-order brides are for?

[peaceinwar]

A shower/bathtub cleaning fairy

[CrudeHypothesis]

I need a biological necessities fairy so I can never need to do anything biologically necessary, like television characters.

[Muumeh]

Plot, I'll be your scything and demolition (or painting) fairy if you are my dusting/vacuuming fairy.

[plotthickens]

Plot, I'll be your scything and demolition (or painting) fairy if you are my dusting/vacuuming fairy.

Deal. There's 1.2 acres to be scythed and nine rooms to be painted, I'll be over to dust and vacuum your one-bedroom flat shortly. :D

[True Rune]

Schmoozing.

[Moxiie]

Deal. There's 1.2 acres to be scythed and nine rooms to be painted, I'll be over to dust and vacuum your one-bedroom flat shortly. :D

The caveat on the chore fairy is that when chore fairy tasks are undertaken in trade with one another, a fairy costume is to be worn while attending to said chore.

[deconspire]

Schmoozing.

Dude, I'll do that for you.

[plotthickens]

The caveat on the chore fairy is that when chore fairy tasks are undertaken in trade with one another, a fairy costume is to be worn while attending to said chore.

I'll wear whatever you have in my size as long as it gets my chores done. Caveat: do not try to scythe with a big skirt. You'll end up with a little skirt of ribbons.

[Harmony]

I need a laundry fairy. I hate hanging and folding clothes! :yuck:
A renovation fairy would be nice too.... I've got to get a start on the bathroom and kitchen remodel...

[plushbug]

Kitchenwork fairy, please. :yuck:

[Moxiie]

I'll wear whatever you have in my size as long as it gets my chores done. Caveat: do not try to scythe with a big skirt. You'll end up with a little skirt of ribbons.

A potential new entrepreneurial endeavor might be to resell the skirt of ribbons to some hula dancers.

[Kisai]

Someone to look for employment for me. I hate doing it myself.

[Silverity]

I'll do ALL of your laundry if I can have an Anti-Clutter Faerie and a Sweeping Faerie. I don't really mind sweeping but this new place I've moved into has dust 24/7 and none of us know how to get rid of it x.x;

[Zodd]

Haha, my mom does all those things.

I don't even know what 3/4 of these chores mean.

Pick one. Any one. Please.

Scything fairy.
Painting fairy.
Transplanting fairy.
Retaining wall fairy.
Contractor for the New Sitting Room fairy.
Housework fairy.
Orchard fairy.
Permaculture fairy.
Native garden fairy.
Demolition fairy.
Bug Patrol fairy.
Pool Cleaning fairy.
Chicken fairy.
Shopping fairy.
House Improvement fairy.

It's not that I don't like doing these things, it's that there's SO FUCKING MANY OF THEM TO DO. I'd love to have any of these fairies, please, especially #5.

I do hate getting out of bed, turning on the light, turning on the computer, putting on clothes so maybe I'd get a "getting out of bed, turning on the light, turning on the computer, putting on clothes" fairy.

[Muumeh]

You get to dust and vacuum my one bedroom flat quite a few times before I'm done with the scything and painting though. Since long skirts (and robes) are indeed a poor choice for scything, will black sweatpants coupled with black hoodie make decent Grim Reaper of Plants Fairy Outfit? I guess I could also apply some make-up, but it'd start running down my face quite fast I believe.

[stealthfighter]

Laundry and cooking. Two things I would never have the confidence to do on my own.

[plotthickens]

I'll do ALL of your laundry if I can have an Anti-Clutter Faerie and a Sweeping Faerie. I don't really mind sweeping but this new place I've moved into has dust 24/7 and none of us know how to get rid of it x.x;

Check all your air filters: intakes, the ones at the HVAC machines, and on your outlets.

You get to dust and vacuum my one bedroom flat quite a few times before I'm done with the scything and painting though. Since long skirts (and robes) are indeed a poor choice for scything, will black sweatpants coupled with black hoodie make decent Grim Reaper of Plants Fairy Outfit? I guess I could also apply some make-up, but it'd start running down my face quite fast I believe.

Hell, if you scythe and paint I'll even do your dishes and cook for you.

[fireandicecat]

one to clean the bathroom & wash the floors...
i don't mind doing laundry.
one to cook -- i can, but it's not worth the time & the mess...

[Gunsmith]

No chore fairy. Just a housewife that doesn't watch tv all day while reading romance novels.

[plotthickens]

No chore fairy. Just a housewife that doesn't watch tv all day while reading romance novels.

With that kind of attitude, who WOULDN'T run to serve you!!!!

[nowt]

Drink, weed and migraine fairy-- coffee and tea, mostly.

[Mattman3d]

I need a life fairy. I fail at having to interact with reality.

[Ambra]

I need a laundry fairy. I hate doing laundry!