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View Full Version : the improbable: do esfp women come here?


nonentropic
05-25-2008, 01:30 PM
i will see. life-balance is sought. i tend to like some folks within my own type too. it is nice to be understood or at least be around those who are capable of it.

Vertigo
05-25-2008, 01:33 PM
Opposites attract so good luck to you and hi.

ssfanatic
05-25-2008, 01:34 PM
Capable of empathy, huh.
*checks off on his list of compliments he has never recieved*
Nice to have you too. Welcome.

Motor Jax
05-25-2008, 01:48 PM
welcome to the forum, nonentropic

make yourself comfortable, and have some mint tea

Jezebel
05-25-2008, 05:22 PM
do esfp women come here? i will see. life-balance is sought.
You'd have better luck finding them at a bar than a nerdy typology internet forum. What exactly are you trying to balance, anyway?

mental drift
05-25-2008, 08:03 PM
I don't think there are any on the forum, but best bet is find one and marry him/her, then you can enjoy the presence of their company all the time.

You'd have better luck finding them at a bar than a nerdy typology internet forum. What exactly are you trying to balance, anyway?

Hopefully not your checkbook. Numbers are definately one of my wife's weaknesses. ;D

nonentropic
05-25-2008, 10:44 PM
You'd have better luck finding them at a bar than a nerdy typology internet forum. What exactly are you trying to balance, anyway?

- myself - i'm actually far too serious, loaded w/ out-there info/concepts and such sh-t. i'm seeking an extreme opposite female...for balance...for my continued sanity. it's about the most important thing for me to do at this time. an a compatible esfp seems to exactly what i need. i think i will focus on the women who visit my mom's sewing biz much more closely. i get along with some intjs too natch. so, i'll likely keep studying this site for intj realted stuff as well. timing is quite important...among other things. - we shall see. -

Elfrun
05-26-2008, 12:10 AM
Hmm, a fella comes to an intj forum in search of an esfp? do you see the problem in your thinking? :rolleyes:

I feel an obligation to warn you that hanging around here will only add to your unbalanced sanity.

Welcome, good luck in your quest :thumbsup:

PHS Philip
05-26-2008, 12:16 AM
I remember that at the 6 month anniversary mark we didn't have any ISFP's or ESFP's, although we may now.

Either way, welcome! But as Trinity said, I don't know that some of us are the people to hang around for mental balance... :thumbsup:

Elfrun
05-26-2008, 12:43 AM
Aww, I so wanna pet your avatar PHS, so cute :lovestruck:

Solaris
05-26-2008, 01:39 AM
*blinks*
Um, well, hello first. Second, did you actually read the title of our forum? :P

So, yeah, good luck with that. Incidentally, I'm an ENTJ who was married (note the was) to an ISFP. I'm here to tell you that opposites are not always a good thing. Whoever popularized the use of "opposites attract" as an acceptable explanation for being in a relationship with somebody so far from who you are, that you barely understand each other, should be slapped...repeatedly.

Bioplasmoid
05-26-2008, 02:03 AM
I agree, its a silly notion that total opposites make a good relationship. Ok maybe they brew passion in and out of the bedroom, but it seems unlikely that in most longterm relationships being vastly different to each other could actually help keep them together. I wonder if there have been any studies on this...

nonentropic
05-26-2008, 09:14 AM
thanks for the welcomes, thoughts and advice all around. i'm 44 now. i've been posting on other type sites for a couple of years. i'll accept good freinds and good people wherever i can find them. it just seems to me, plus based on my past experiences that i really do need a compatible esfp female to counterbalance what i am. one very important and big area of contention for me has always been my very strong interest and attraction to nice female feet (the soles in particular). i am quite convinced the esfps are the ones who are most likely to be open and accepting of this...and so on. i am far too serious now. i need to smile more like my avy pic from 4 years back. a good zany compatible esfp will likely do the trick better than or as well as anyone (any woman that is :) .... yeah, i'm quite straight and consistent regarding my libido maintenance.

azelismia
05-26-2008, 06:15 PM
- myself - i'm actually far too serious, loaded w/ out-there info/concepts and such sh-t. i'm seeking an extreme opposite female...for balance...for my continued sanity. it's about the most important thing for me to do at this time. an a compatible esfp seems to exactly what i need. i think i will focus on the women who visit my mom's sewing biz much more closely. i get along with some intjs too natch. so, i'll likely keep studying this site for intj realted stuff as well. timing is quite important...among other things. - we shall see. -


I think you've got some mistaken ideas of how that works. it isn't a matter of balance it's a matter of understanding as well. Esfp's are completely alien to everything Intj's are. If you're looking for fun I think there are personalities in all types who are goofy. Just look for someone who isnt' serious but who shares your interests somewhat. I think the path you're looking down is just one to frustration and alienation.


oh you are a foot fetishist and esfp's are the only ones who reliably paint their toenails.. I get it. well good luck with that. you shouldn't have too much problems. I doubt a sewing circle is the place to find someone that's ok with that though. I'd go to some of those swingers barsto find that sort of person if that were my thing.

nonentropic
05-26-2008, 07:17 PM
again, i am 44. the women who've really driven me nuts in a good way, over the years, have been esfps apparently. the intensity of the kind of attraction i've had for these women has been too much for me to deal with up until just recently. still, i am open-minded. i don't drink. i do smoke some cigs on a daily basis though. i've spent much of my adult life figuring things out...both internally and externally. how i fit (or do not fit)/am integrated into the whole. it is my worldview...my conception of things...my understanding of things current and their trends/progression and so on...that are really pushing me to to find someone who can make be forget about them...at least some of the time. intjs and other good thinkers and people i'm always willing to get to know. actually i believe i've already found a potential esfp (maybe enfp) at my mom's sewing biz. it is located within a very large JoAnn's Etc store. lots of women come and go. this one in particular is a new employee of the overall store. i only go there to pick-up machines/exchange ones i've fixed and sometimes fix some in my mom's store on the spot. i've had many jobs/different types of jobs...done and seen many things. i may not know it all certainly but, i do think i know at least a few things about the society i live in am myself. there's always likely room for improvement. sometimes though one must just say this is good enough and leave it at that.

i do believe one's values, beliefs, interests and so on are very important in finding compatibility. things will be weighed and considered. i am looking to have more fun now rather than taking any of my theories and thougths about things any further at this time. please believe me. i know why i'm doing this seeking...it's to save/to keep my sanity actually. - more later perhaps -

simplisticjoy
05-26-2008, 08:00 PM
Evidently, ENFP is much better than ESFP. Still get the differences, but have the ability to at least understand.

I personally often would like to stab ENFPs, but only because it's an easy way out of the problems they so willingly provide my poor tired mind. ESFPs are fun, attractive, and..well, it seems like they intentionally misread, misunderstand, and misinterpret, but knowing the character, I guess it's just a difference of personality.

nonentropic
05-26-2008, 09:32 PM
Evidently, ENFP is much better than ESFP. Still get the differences, but have the ability to at least understand.

I personally often would like to stab ENFPs, but only because it's an easy way out of the problems they so willingly provide my poor tired mind. ESFPs are fun, attractive, and..well, it seems like they intentionally misread, misunderstand, and misinterpret, but knowing the character, I guess it's just a difference of personality.

enfp vs esfp ??? according to Socioincs (which describes MBTI INTJs as INTps) esfps are my dual...are supposed to be my best match. also, according to Socionics other intps (other intjs actually) are supposed to be a good match. MBTI and such points toward ENFPs, ENTPs, and other INTJs as the best for compatibility as i recall. in the end, it all comes down to the folks involved...the individuals concerned.





nonentropic added to this post, 79 minutes and 53 seconds later...

welcome to the forum, nonentropic

make yourself comfortable, and have some mint tea

i drink my coffee black and strong, heh. yes, B.W. ... hello. this is an interesting, very active and rapidly growing site presently.

Tokey41
05-27-2008, 12:35 AM
I've actually just started dating an ESFP... it's amazing how different we are as people, but we do share similar values. I'll be sure to let you know how it goes but it's been a bit of a bumpy start. Not for her, she seems to be incredibly happy, but i'm having such a hard time reading her that it's driving me nuts. I think I just need more time to understand what exactly i'm dealing with and analyze what kind of person she is... it will take time, but my advice is when you meet your ESFP lady friend don't let the first few days scare you! They are a very strange breed to us.

nonentropic
05-27-2008, 10:58 AM
I've actually just started dating an ESFP... it's amazing how different we are as people, but we do share similar values. I'll be sure to let you know how it goes but it's been a bit of a bumpy start. Not for her, she seems to be incredibly happy, but i'm having such a hard time reading her that it's driving me nuts. I think I just need more time to understand what exactly i'm dealing with and analyze what kind of person she is... it will take time, but my advice is when you meet your ESFP lady friend don't let the first few days scare you! They are a very strange breed to us.

thanks for posting! i think the very strange thing goes both ways. we can be enigmas to them as well. i think it's important to focus on the attraction and the unity that is created as a whole between the 2 perhaps. if, i have any success in the near term (let's say this summer for instance) i'll post about it as well.





nonentropic added to this post, 223 minutes and 53 seconds later...

one more thing: i consider myself to be a mechanic of the mind...the realm of the human mind is my domain...on the other hand, esfps can become the social wizards. combine the two in a decent fashion and theoretically all the "bases" are covered. i believe this to be true for these types of people. this is the cruel joke of life...that one may actually need a very strong opposite to actually balance-out one's own strengths and weaknesses. no one can be all things to anyone ever...one is also never entirely self-sufficient but, seemingly the opposing pairs together can make one hell of a good team. hopefully, i'll be fortunate enough to determine this for myself to some extent. we shall see. success to compatibility!

Marcus
05-27-2008, 03:47 PM
if, i have any success in the near term (let's say this summer for instance) i'll post about it as well.
I'm also interested in how this kind of relationship works in practice.


one more thing: i consider myself to be a mechanic of the mind...the realm of the human mind is my domain...on the other hand, esfps can become the social wizards. combine the two in a decent fashion and theoretically all the "bases" are covered.
i believe this to be true for these types of people. this is the cruel joke of life...that one may actually need a very strong opposite to actually balance-out one's own strengths and weaknesses. no one can be all things to anyone ever...one is also never entirely self-sufficient but, seemingly the opposing pairs together can make one hell of a good team. hopefully, i'll be fortunate enough to determine this for myself to some extent. we shall see. success to compatibility!
I cannot report on romantic relationships, but I have an ESFP boss and had a close ESFP friend. The complementarity worked well. The positive thing is that I got focused on life and that I've never felt being forced to make bad compromises. The problem is that we have very different reactions if things go wrong. I want to analyze the disaster profoundly, draw the consequences and change strategy , while they want to get over it as quickly as possible.

hauteur
05-29-2008, 04:53 PM
again, i am 44. the women who've really driven me nuts in a good way, over the years, have been esfps apparently. the intensity of the kind of attraction i've had for these women has been too much for me to deal with up until just recently. still, i am open-minded.

I've been married to an xSFP for ten years. Yeah, there is a definite inititial attraction. It's like a flash fire, though. Hot and fast and, if you're not carefull, you'll lose your eyebrows. ;D

Actually, it can work, but it takes one heck of a lot of work. And she has to be just as committed to understanding and accepting you as you are to her. I love her immensely, but if I were to find myself single, would I marry another one? Nope, huh-uh, no way buddy, not on your life, nyet, nein, no, and hell no.

Oh yeah, welcome.

Hagbard
05-29-2008, 05:37 PM
but if I were to find myself single, would I marry another one? Nope, huh-uh, no way buddy, not on your life, nyet, nein, no, and hell no.


Don't let her read that, or losing an eyebrow might be the last of your concerns! :laugh:

curiousjane
05-29-2008, 05:47 PM
I see I've arrived late.

And not to contribute to the foot fetish ... but I would like to point out, humbly, that I (INFP), one of my best friend (INTP), my roommate/ one of my best friends (ISFJ), my good friend (ESTJ), and another good friend (ESFJ ... I think) all paint our toenails. This is hardly restricted to ESFPs. In fact, we have all gone, at one point or another, to a salon together to have pedicures. Now, I will grant that the ESFJ and ESTJ gals go the most often. And get designs added for the fun of it.

The reason is simple: pedicures feel good. And sometimes a girl just needs to feel good after a long, stressful week. It does wonders for the mental health!

I guess I should also say that I'm only approximately 53.1% girly. So my opinion might not count. ;)

ohhhhh ... and welcome!

Solaris
05-29-2008, 07:26 PM
I see I've arrived late.

And not to contribute to the foot fetish ... but I would like to point out, humbly, that I (INFP), one of my best friend (INTP), my roommate/ one of my best friends (ISFJ), my good friend (ESTJ), and another good friend (ESFJ ... I think) all paint our toenails. This is hardly restricted to ESFPs. In fact, we have all gone, at one point or another, to a salon together to have pedicures. Now, I will grant that the ESFJ and ESTJ gals go the most often. And get designs added for the fun of it.

The reason is simple: pedicures feel good. And sometimes a girl just needs to feel good after a long, stressful week. It does wonders for the mental health!

I guess I should also say that I'm only approximately 53.1% girly. So my opinion might not count. ;)

ohhhhh ... and welcome!

Disgusting. I don't want people touching my feet. I don't like it. There's something....just weird about it. If I allow you to touch my feet, it means I love you, I am in my martial arts class, or that I am somehow being forced to submit.

nonentropic
05-30-2008, 01:36 AM
thanks again folks! i sort of feel like i've been burned by being born in the first place (: ... anyway, i'm really starting to look forward to interacting with people on this site. this is good. sorta feels like a home (maybe a home for weirdos...well, some of us are...it's just the way it is/things are...and perhaps i am).

rwyatt365
05-30-2008, 03:05 PM
Disgusting. I don't want people touching my feet. I don't like it. There's something....just weird about it. If I allow you to touch my feet, it means I love you, I am in my martial arts class, or that I am somehow being forced to submit.
Submit your feet, or perish! Your toes, or your life!! Arrrrr *the foot-pirate speaks*

Welcome to our sick fantasies, nonentropic!

nonentropic
05-30-2008, 05:08 PM
yes, intjs tend to be a strange-weird-eccentric lot. i'm no exception. i do value goodness, things done well, and the best way also fwiw.