Does emotion have a delayed effect on you?

[Jgib5328]

I've noticed that emotions have a delayed effect on me. When something bad happens, during the bad event, I'll feel practically nothing, but later on I'll start feeling the emotions that I should've felt. An example is something that happened today. About an hour ago I got a B on a test, which is probably the most disappointing thing that could've possible happened to me. When I initially got the test back, I felt nothing and even made jokes with my classmates. Now, about an hour later, I'm starting to get really angry and feeling a whole slew of negative emotions, but even now, I'm not feeling the full range of the emotions, and it will probably hit later in the day. There are a bunch of times in which this has happened. Has this happened to you?

[Solaris]

I've noticed that emotions have a delayed effect on me. When something bad happens, during the bad event, I'll feel practically nothing, but later on I'll start feeling the emotions that I should've felt. An example is something that happened today. About an hour ago I got a B on a test, which is probably the most disappointing thing that could've possible happened to me. When I initially got the test back, I felt nothing and even made jokes with my classmates. Now, about an hour later, I'm starting to get really angry and feeling a whole slew of negative emotions, but even now, I'm not feeling the full range of the emotions, and it will probably hit later in the day. There are a bunch of times in which this has happened. Has this happened to you?

Yes. I tend to think this is the very essence of being a T. That's just my opinion, and it may happen to Fs as well (any of you care to share?). I wonder if it's maybe an N thing instead. I know my SF friends feel things, and react to them *now* at pretty much all times.

[Hdier]

I tend to not get stressed out about things until after they happen. If I am in a band concert, I get all nervous and worried after the concert, but leading up to and during it I feel totally relaxed.

Not sure if that's exactly what you meant, but that's what happens to me! (though, only with stress; everything else happens in-the-moment)

[Motor Jax]

oh, no

i'm like, emotionally in the moment

if something disappointing happens, i'm instantly reactive

if something pisses me off, i'm instantly livid

[blue tie]

Sometimes, when I feel, I'm actually thinking that the feeling is a result of societal pressure, and it's not really me feeling from the get go. Sometimes I force myself to bubble up and feel something, just to play along with everybody. But for the most part, I like it icy cold in here.

Emotion is only good when it's sincere and you mean it (love? crying?) or when I'm watching, what I call, complicated romance. :) But yeah in general I hate romance stuff.

[malefide]

Yeah, this happens to me quite often. I put up a front of objectivity/neutrality often when in public (99% of the time, barring a few times with friends), so I'll sometimes trick myself into believing at the moment of the Bad Thing that I don't feel anything. But afterward, as it sinks in and as I retreat into my head (i.e. my N function takes over), the emotion also starts to hit me.

[Aronnax]

Sometimes I intentionally delay emotions (like sadness) by pushing the related thoughts to the back of my head and concentrating on other tasks until I feel it's safe to let the feeling take hold. I've done this a few times with the death of friends and family. Mourning is crippling and someone needs to take care of everything until the group is back on their feet.

[sriv]

Yeah, this happens to me quite often. I put up a front of objectivity/neutrality often when in public (99% of the time, barring a few times with friends), so I'll sometimes trick myself into believing at the moment of the Bad Thing that I don't feel anything. But afterward, as it sinks in and as I retreat into my head (i.e. my N function takes over), the emotion also starts to hit me.

Exactly. In my case "the Bad Thing" is the Bad/Good Thing. Change "except a few times with friends" to except a few times with family.

[azelismia]

I've noticed that emotions have a delayed effect on me. When something bad happens, during the bad event, I'll feel practically nothing, but later on I'll start feeling the emotions that I should've felt. An example is something that happened today. About an hour ago I got a B on a test, which is probably the most disappointing thing that could've possible happened to me. When I initially got the test back, I felt nothing and even made jokes with my classmates. Now, about an hour later, I'm starting to get really angry and feeling a whole slew of negative emotions, but even now, I'm not feeling the full range of the emotions, and it will probably hit later in the day. There are a bunch of times in which this has happened. Has this happened to you?

That sounds like shock to me.

[sriv]

You could describe it as shock, but for me it happens with any type of emotional event. On the spot, we have inferior Se, so it does not compute at first. Then when introverting alone, we think about it and the tertiary Fi kicks in. It makes perfect sense for an INTJ.

[curiousjane]

Yes. I tend to think this is the very essence of being a T. That's just my opinion, and it may happen to Fs as well (any of you care to share?). I wonder if it's maybe an N thing instead. I know my SF friends feel things, and react to them *now* at pretty much all times.

Hmmm. How to describe this from my perspective?

I am an INFP because I have a deeply held set of values that drive my life and all decisions in it. These values are somewhat emotional, somewhat logical, somewhat spiritual, somewhat relational. They can be reactionary, yes, but they are not necessarily "feely" or "emotional".

I tend to hold back my feelings, if they are not joy or quirkiness. The bad feelings, I get all wrapped up in and focused upon.

For instance, when I was a teenager, I moved from one state to another. I was so devastated by this move that I went into a state of what I can now only call shock mingled with depression. I was listless, tired, cried myself to sleep at night for weeks, and absolutely HAD to be busy at ALL times, in order to avoid feeling anything at all. Because if I felt anything, I would feel everything.

I am going to have to come back to this and fill in details later. Right now, I've been online for too long and my eyes are hurting!

[mkay]

I've noticed that emotions have a delayed effect on me. When something bad happens, during the bad event, I'll feel practically nothing, but later on I'll start feeling the emotions that I should've felt. ... There are a bunch of times in which this has happened. Has this happened to you?

I tend to go straight to logic, to see whether there's something I can do immediately. Like once a gunman came in and robbed my dad's business. I was probably 10 years old, and I was napping nearby and knew to not make sudden moves and to try to remember what the gunman looked like. I did that coming right out of a nap and didn't feel fear. ... Once my car broke down in the fast lane of a really busy NYC bridge without a shoulder. I immediately thought about how I could stay safe and keep people from crashing into me. So I quickly popped the blinkers, hopped out, popped open the back of my station wagon, hopped back into my car and called 9-1-1. Whatever fear I felt (low level), I channeled into something productive. ... I tend to get cool and collected in any stressful situation, to think what I could be doing to better my situation immediately. That's part of what made me a good journalist, especially in any kind of crunch. ... Then I feel pretty good after, that I dealt with what needed to be dealt with efficiently. I'm very solution-oriented, so I tend to even "solve" my emotional situations.

[Hdier]

For instance, when I was a teenager, I moved from one state to another. I was so devastated by this move that I went into a state of what I can now only call shock mingled with depression. I was listless, tired, cried myself to sleep at night for weeks, and absolutely HAD to be busy at ALL times, in order to avoid feeling anything at all. Because if I felt anything, I would feel everything.

I moved across the country (from AZ to VA), then to more or less the middle of the country (currently residing in NE). During the first move, I moved away from 3 friends, one of whom was very close to me. I did something similar to what you did, except instead of being busy I became much more aggressive, verbally not physically, and became very arrogant (before I simply knew I could do the things and had confidence; now in school [the only time I'm in public, really] I'm closer to being a stuck-up prick). I also made sure that no one would ever become my friend (believe it or not their are one or two people who actually wanted to despite my attitude; they were solved quickly). In fact, I stopped posting on the forum for a while because I was worried about making friends, and the emotions would hit me. They did, after about three years. Talk about a delay.

On the other hand, when my parents split up, I started crying, etc. immediately and adjusted rather quickly. Maybe I subconsciously learned from my mistake? (only I don't think that I had recognized it as a mistake at that point)

[Brendan]

I've noticed that emotions have a delayed effect on me. When something bad happens, during the bad event, I'll feel practically nothing, but later on I'll start feeling the emotions that I should've felt. An example is something that happened today. About an hour ago I got a B on a test, which is probably the most disappointing thing that could've possible happened to me. When I initially got the test back, I felt nothing and even made jokes with my classmates. Now, about an hour later, I'm starting to get really angry and feeling a whole slew of negative emotions, but even now, I'm not feeling the full range of the emotions, and it will probably hit later in the day. There are a bunch of times in which this has happened. Has this happened to you?

my case, emotional delay: yes...

it may take a while, but often when emotions do hit, they can hit hard...


my case, I personally don't really give a crap about grades, nor that much what people think about me, but there is some vague sense of "obligation" (or at least, paranoia, over the impending parental response when it turns out I have bombed these stupid classes).

it is like, people want me to take these stupid classes because theoretically they will effect my life in some meaningful way...

I think it is pointless to be wasting time I could be better using doing something actually useful (like, having a job and getting money...), or at least going for a major that would actually have some relevance (what use does a theology major have?... especially if I go for anything tech related?...).

(parents forced me, more or less, into having a certain major...).
actually, they want me to be a teacher, but I don't so much want to be a teacher (me, much rather being a programmer, or software-engineer, or whatever...).


now, as for me, emotions are mixed...
sometimes I am depressed.
sometimes I am annoyed.
sometimes I am frustrated.
sometimes I have many other emotions.

mostly, I have some general sense of what I want, but no one listens to a damn thing I have to say about anything, be it parents, or all the lazy undirected masses, AKA, 'peers', or females, who can prove themselves to be annoyingly uncooperative for no real gain for either me or them...

of course, right now, it seems I have annoyance and frustration...


as a misc note:
strangely, often I end up liking some romance shows (usually anime).
I also like some misc "TV Y" shows as well.

I can't really explain it so well though...


I have otherwise almost no real sense of romance (on "love tests", I come out dominantly pragma, and to a large degree, I relate to females this way as well). of course, I guess I do feel lonely due to the lack of female interest.

it is not like I don't talk to them or anything (usually, I make it fairly obvious what my intentions are, typically in the form of direct statement). they tend not to be interested though (I think, it is not like I am immoral or anything, my goal is to find someone, and if they are available as well and have apparently similar goals, then why do they not agree?...).

in the past, I have tried bartering and arguing with them (and have been tempted by this again recently), but usually IME this makes them start avoiding me for some reason (it is not like the trades I typically propose are unfair...).

well, restraint helps to what extent that I can still talk to them, even if things have a tendency to go nowhere...


most "TV Y" shows are asinine, but somehow "oddly compelling"... it seems I am weak against whatever kind of strange technology they are using to keep the wilders at bay...


or such...

[onlyparallel]

my case, emotional delay: yes...

it may take a while, but often when emotions do hit, they can hit hard...



I'm the same way. Just today a friend I've had for about ten yeras really insulted me, and at first I didn't really feel anything. Then about an hour later I really felt betrayed, enraged even. Normaly people wouldn't really affect me like that, I don't care much about what hey think, but since I'd been friends for so long and respected her so much it really hurt.

[Joxstrap]

I very rarely get emotional in the moment, it is only when i think about it afterwards that i tend to get emotional. Or if i have something else to do to not think about it, then i just completely skip out on the emotional aspect.

[Bri]

I've noticed that emotions have a delayed effect on me. When something bad happens, during the bad event, I'll feel practically nothing, but later on I'll start feeling the emotions that I should've felt. An example is something that happened today. About an hour ago I got a B on a test, which is probably the most disappointing thing that could've possible happened to me. When I initially got the test back, I felt nothing and even made jokes with my classmates. Now, about an hour later, I'm starting to get really angry and feeling a whole slew of negative emotions, but even now, I'm not feeling the full range of the emotions, and it will probably hit later in the day. There are a bunch of times in which this has happened. Has this happened to you?

I'm the same exact way. I think it has to do with privacy and keeping things to ourselves. I can't stand crying or getting really upset when people are around, so naturally I'll either never show it or show it in private. But even then, it seems like I am more laid back about things than other people who react on the spot.

[True Rune]

It's been too long, so I don't know. Probably. Yeah, this explains weird emotions out of nowhere, it's from past annoyances. It's better this way, because I'm usually alone in these instances.

[aude]

My emotions are not really delayed. I only use them in a last resort.Just recently had a major brush fire not even 10 yards from the front door. My family where panicking and wondering what to do. After wards they came up to me and starting yelling at me for not panicking. They couldn't fathom why i just sat there and had my morning breakfast and got ready to leave, full knowing that there could be a chance that the house could have been burnt down. I looked at them and just retort that the firemen and who ever else was out there. And i did not see a reason to panic.

In my youth i had to learn what my emotions where and when to use them effectively.

[TheLastMohican]

My emotions are not really delayed. I only use them in a last resort.Just recently had a major brush fire not even 10 yards from the front door. My family where panicking and wondering what to do. After wards they came up to me and starting yelling at me for not panicking. They couldn't fathom why i just sat there and had my morning breakfast and got ready to leave, full knowing that there could be a chance that the house could have been burnt down. I looked at them and just retort that the firemen and who ever else was out there. And i did not see a reason to panic.


That is completely ridiculous. There is nothing good about panicking, and there is no reason for people to want you to panic except that they are embarrassed that you were the only level-headed one. They are just trying to reduce you to their level.

[aude]

That is completely ridiculous. There is nothing good about panicking, and there is no reason for people to want you to panic except that they are embarrassed that you were the only level-headed one. They are just trying to reduce you to their level.

I know its so funny when people are so quick to there own emotions. What kinda annoys me is when people cry over something so stupid.

[quest ion]

It depends. If it's about a romantic relationship, then my feelings will never be delayed. Instead, I'll be almost thinking about it all the time. In fact, my emotions will be all over the place especially when things happen during the course of the relationship with the other person.

But if it's over useless events such as being criticised/insulted over something I don't agree with after, say, analyzing my actions, I won't feel hurt at all. I won't even bother to ask why the person said so. I wouldn't be angry with the person as well, because I'd think it's more of a judgment error and not his fault. I never liked to take things personally, because nothing good would come out of it. More awkwardness would follow...usually so. I'm pretty sure that I'm conscious of my actions and their implications, so as not to receive averse attitudes from people.

I know I'm probably not the best with displaying my emotions(at that immediate moment or after). But surprisingly(or so I think it is a cool revelation ever since I've matured over the years), I have pretty decent emotional quotient. Maby it's due to the fact that I never wanted to offend anyone, thereby leading to greater emotional distress/tension between me and someone else. I try to be as nice as possible to everyone I know.

Jgib5328, I had the same experience as you. But I guess mine was more of shock. I knew I should be sad at the moment of receiving the horrible results of exam, but instead I was rather stoned. Maby I wasn't used to expecting anything prior to getting results. Or maby I'm too used to not feeling anything about that particular event because probably unconsciously, I knew it's not going to be a big deal after all.

[Noehelia]

It happens to me all the time, mainly for stressful emotions like being angry or sad. I remember when I was a teenager people asked whether I ever felt insulted because I did not react immediately in an insult. Once there was a person that teased me for hours, testing when I would react. For me we had a regular conversation and afterwards it hit me what were his intentions and felt bad about it (I did not feel bad about what he said, I felt bad with the notion that he was trying to hurt me).
When everyone is in panic and great stress I seem the most calm and cold person there is in the room. I prefer to think rationally at these moments and try to figure out what has to be done, it's just there is no point in panicking. It's like I am in kind of shock but a fruitful one.
The good thing is that I have managed to react now quicker to external stimuli for the nice emotions of happiness and joy because as a kid I was so overanalyzing everything that I didn't feel almost anything.

[changos]

For what I have read, people like us "deep thinkers" and also introverts, are very peculiar... the experiences usually reach the thinking first, where we deal with the "problem" so then it will go to the emotional side.

It can also be learned as a consequence of "should I bother?" it could translate as a defense mechanism where we could decide "ok, don't pay attention to this negative thing..." or also with positive things "don't loose control, we have a mission herer".

I usually have a delay in emotions, so very often strong experiences mean nothing to me and I act like a soldier, robot or lider of the resistance... and then, suddenly my "heart" start digesting the experience and I brake pretty bad...

Is not very often... I'm quite "strong" if such thing can be said... (while others just say I can turn feelings off) I had 3 really strong experiences where others have said they would have gone mad, insane... or would have tried to kill somebody... I reacted like in a movie with a lot of self control... but then the memories attack... I'm working on it.

[Anat]

Yes, it works the same way for me, but there is a difference between a bad and a good situation. I tend to become very analytical if something bad happens. I stay very calm and do what has to be done, go home, go about my business as if nothing happened. I can't talk to other people about what went wrong. Then, a day later or so, emotions hit and I start feeling.
The funny thing is: if what happened is very nice, I react instantly. There is no delay and I am able to enjoy the moment, feel what happens, and respond. How is that for you, fellow members of this forum? Is there a difference between 'good' and 'bad' situations and a delay in feeling?

[JMX]

Emotion has a delayed effect on me too. I feel "something" in the moment, but only later, after having time to think about the situation, do I really feel my true emotions of the event. This happens in both "good" and "bad" situations, although I feel more of the "good" emotions in the moment.

[Antares]

Today, I found out that I failed my lab on Bio. Initially, I felt nothing; now, I still feel nothing. I'm turning schizoid, probably. I used to be devastated by losses and unfortunate happenings in personal relationships, now it's all numb to me.

[PRBori]

Sometimes I intentionally delay emotions (like sadness) by pushing the related thoughts to the back of my head and concentrating on other tasks until I feel it's safe to let the feeling take hold. I've done this a few times with the death of friends and family. Mourning is crippling and someone needs to take care of everything until the group is back on their feet.

I'm pretty much the same... depends on the situation I take time to reach...sometimes people think I'm cold blooded...sometimes it just take times for the hit to take place... but all in all due to my view of life "Where everything happens for a reason" I tend not to react right away...

[Minerva]

Yes. I tend to think this is the very essence of being a T. That's just my opinion, and it may happen to Fs as well (any of you care to share?). I wonder if it's maybe an N thing instead. I know my SF friends feel things, and react to them *now* at pretty much all times.

When something happens, I immediately FEEL the effects of it. Whether or not I act on the emotions is another story. I tend to internalize my feelings, and deal with them at a more appropriate time. For example, just yesterday, one of my closest friends said something really stupid and it made me very angry with him. However, I knew that if I told him what I was thinking at the moment, and also because of his temper, it would have caused a bad argument. We were in class, so it was not the right time to reprimand him. So I waited for the afternoon, when I cooled off to talk to him about it.





Minerva added to this post, 8 minutes and 33 seconds later...

That is completely ridiculous. There is nothing good about panicking, and there is no reason for people to want you to panic except that they are embarrassed that you were the only level-headed one. They are just trying to reduce you to their level.

Spoken like a true TJ. ;)

Its obvious that the other people thought something was wrong with aude since, judging by their reactions, panicking was the way to go.

That said, people really have to realize that panicking does nothing but make matters appear worse than they already are or actually are.





Minerva added to this post, 9 minutes and 14 seconds later...

Yes, it works the same way for me, but there is a difference between a bad and a good situation. I tend to become very analytical if something bad happens. I stay very calm and do what has to be done, go home, go about my business as if nothing happened. I can't talk to other people about what went wrong. Then, a day later or so, emotions hit and I start feeling.
The funny thing is: if what happened is very nice, I react instantly. There is no delay and I am able to enjoy the moment, feel what happens, and respond. How is that for you, fellow members of this forum? Is there a difference between 'good' and 'bad' situations and a delay in feeling?

Like I said above, I always feel. However, when something good happens, I enjoy these uplifting, positive feelings so I react immediately. When something bad happens, whether or not I react instantly depends on the situation. But usually, if I am busy, I perform all my tasks that I have to do and then if I feel like crying, I do it in private at the end of the day, when I have time and room to myself.

[Rick]

Been up too long to read all these responses.

To answer your question, yes, emotions have delayed effects on me. Actually, the emotions don't have an effect - the perceived need from others for me to be affected are what I miss til later.

I do not think at all well on my feet, so, later, I replay events.

When I do, sometimes I realize the full import of a situation to other people and realize I need to issue a response (generally meaning something emotional).

[curiousjane]

Sorrow is delayed. I have been exhausted by it lately. I cry after the fact, or I cry when I see somebody I care about crying. I rarely feel the tears fall when I am absorbing the initial sorrow.

The difference is when it hits too close to home. When my parents told me two years ago that my mother had Stage 4 cancer, it hit me like a wall. I began crying immediately. I *knew* what the diagnosis meant.

When I heard my grandfather died last month, I did not cry until we were at the grave site and I watched my grandmother mourn, and saw the silent tears trickling down the faces of my otherwise stoic brothers.

I just found out my grandmother is dying, as well. Almost a month later to the day as I was told about my grandfather. This time, the grief is very real, even before her final passing. I've not had time to recover from the last funeral, and I will be going to another. The emotions are still there. I am just finally tapping into them. I've cried a lot the past two days.

But when I am not thinking about it, I am numb. Sometimes, it takes a movie with a character going through a similar circumstance in order to break through the wall around my heart.

Now joy ... joy is immediate. Joy takes me by heartbeat-skipping surprise, bubbles up inside, and pours out. Sometimes Joy is too fleeting. I let it slip away too quickly. I use it up, and look for more.

Love? Love starts for me with denial. And then creeps in, unannounced. Until one day I wake up, and realize that I'm glowing from within. That a look, a touch, a glance is all it takes to make me happy for hours. Love won't leave. It's stubborn that way. It makes me a little squeamish, because if I love, then I am vulnerable if the love is not obviously reciprocated. I don't like being vulnerable. But love ... true, amazing, complete love? It's totally worth it.

[jesse]

Despite being told I am cold and emotionally dead, I do have emotions but they do not surface in my body language too often. There have been some tragedies within the family which have not immediately hit home and it has taken, for example, a day before it really struck, resulting in sorrow and the other paces of dealing with loss.

TheLastMohican is correct regarding panic. Panic stuns and creates a greater mess than necessary. Seems panic is a necessity when something unexpected happens these days. The lemmings do this like clockwork too often.

[Fej]

Yes emotion has a delayed effect on me. I either get all "too emotional (too irrational)" instantly and later am hit with the true, appropriate emotions. Or I either feel cold, and unemotional about something and as time passes I get the real emotions that I should have gotten in the first place. Funny huh.

[Airfire]

Without a doubt, emotion has a delayed effect on me, if any at all. I am always calm and only feel emotions later, after I have meticulously analyzed the situation.

[Snowdragon]

I've noticed that emotions have a delayed effect on me. When something bad happens, during the bad event, I'll feel practically nothing, but later on I'll start feeling the emotions that I should've felt. An example is something that happened today. About an hour ago I got a B on a test, which is probably the most disappointing thing that could've possible happened to me. When I initially got the test back, I felt nothing and even made jokes with my classmates. Now, about an hour later, I'm starting to get really angry and feeling a whole slew of negative emotions, but even now, I'm not feeling the full range of the emotions, and it will probably hit later in the day. There are a bunch of times in which this has happened. Has this happened to you?

You were disappointed about getting a B on a test?! It's like listening to someone with a BMI of 17 complain about their "obesity". A B is not a bad grade, if you think getting a B is bad, try getting an H on a test instead of (God forbid) an F...or worse:scared: a B.

[sriv]

You were disappointed about getting a B on a test?! It's like listening to someone with a BMI of 17 complain about their "obesity". A B is not a bad grade...

Those with high expectations have high aspirations [which tend to come true]. A B is "bad" because once we get into the mindset that a B is not bad, the grades keep dropping.

[VendettaNZ]

Yes my emotions about bad things seem to be delayed until I am in private or unoticed. I actually have a bad habit about nearly completly forgeting very bad emotional issuses, and I cant even remmeber if it happened 5 years or 1 year ago.

[EmporerD]

Yes, I'm am usually very lucid and very rational when something happens to me, It's only later when I think about it that I feel sad/pissed/happy etc...

[AutisticCuckoo]

Emotions tend to be delayed with me, especially when it concerns personal relationships. Not always, but quite often.

It's like it takes a few hours for things to really sink in. I'm notoriously bad at 'reading' people, and it's not until I've had time to think about it and analyze it that I start to understand what was really going on with someone.

[Anon722]

I've noticed that emotions have a delayed effect on me. When something bad happens, during the bad event, I'll feel practically nothing, but later on I'll start feeling the emotions that I should've felt. An example is something that happened today. About an hour ago I got a B on a test, which is probably the most disappointing thing that could've possible happened to me. When I initially got the test back, I felt nothing and even made jokes with my classmates. Now, about an hour later, I'm starting to get really angry and feeling a whole slew of negative emotions, but even now, I'm not feeling the full range of the emotions, and it will probably hit later in the day. There are a bunch of times in which this has happened. Has this happened to you?


It has to me, even with more "mature" issues, like leaving a relationship, changes of work companions, travels. One that is funny is starting to feel you are on vacation after you have came back to work. I couldn't stop wareing sunglasses, taking pictures and playing the "marimba" all day long at the office...

Well... that's not true.

But it has really happened to me sometimes. A perfect example would be arguments, when it's charged with rage or passion, I generally mantain that " Noam Chomsky " Persistant/detached vibe. But after a while I will start feeling a little discomfort and anxiety. Even when I mostly win. (Arguments, I'm bad at poker... If you could only argument your way through it!!) ;)

[beverly penn]

I generally don't have any delayed emotions. I just don't show them right away.

there are also a lot of things that just aren't worth being upset about....it's easier to rationalize it and say "being upset is unproductive on all accounts and I'm not going to do it anymore".

[Elfrun]

I feel negative emotions immediately but I don’t let them take control, basically I choose whether or not I want to keep them, most often the answer is no, let’s just fix the problem. If something happens that invokes a strong emotional reaction I will analyse it later though.

[Maddy]

Yes. I tend to think this is the very essence of being a T. That's just my opinion, and it may happen to Fs as well (any of you care to share?). I wonder if it's maybe an N thing instead. I know my SF friends feel things, and react to them *now* at pretty much all times.

yes. i think i am the opposite of you two. when something bad happens to me i immediately get upset. i take it very hard and often shut down or cry. but then, a little while later, it's like nothing ever happened.
if it's something really bad, i will feel sad every now and then if it comes up again or i get reminded about it. but for the most part i experience my pain or disappointment as soon as i experience the problem, then it passes and goes away.

[Maayan]

Yeah. I might get a cold shock, and then nothing... until the ramifications set in. I'm reminded of this passage from Gormenghast: "In his banishment he had felt the isolation of a severed hand, which realizes that it is no more part of the arm and body it was formed to serve and where the heart still beats. As yet, for him, the horror of his ostracization was too close for him to grasp -- only the crater-like emptiness. The stinging nettles had not had time to fill the yawning hollow. It was loneliness without pain."

[srkelley]

Same thing happens here. Most people think I'm just a pushover or very understanding. It just takes a lot for me to get immediately pissed off or happy. Most of the time it does take a while to kick in. Sometimes I'll even start laughing at something I thought back on that didn't make me laugh the first time I heard it.

[lucyinthefknsky]

This is very true of myself. Any extreme emotion is only felt later--sometimes months later. I have had devastating events happen that have serious psychological effects, but I feel nothing but a dull ache or even a sick inner voice saying "the worst happened, I knew it would" , but the emotion is totally lost. It is not until months later I find myself sobbing, unable to sleep.

I am sure it isn't a healthy method and has sometimes gotten me in worse trouble, but I am unsure if I could survive such a blow, feeling it immediately.

[Jack Raiden]

I've noticed that emotions have a delayed effect on me. When something bad happens, during the bad event, I'll feel practically nothing, but later on I'll start feeling the emotions that I should've felt. An example is something that happened today. About an hour ago I got a B on a test, which is probably the most disappointing thing that could've possible happened to me. When I initially got the test back, I felt nothing and even made jokes with my classmates. Now, about an hour later, I'm starting to get really angry and feeling a whole slew of negative emotions, but even now, I'm not feeling the full range of the emotions, and it will probably hit later in the day. There are a bunch of times in which this has happened. Has this happened to you?

Yep same here. It's usually only upon reflection of the incident that I realize that I'm angry and upset. I think we just get so used to viewing things detached that we fail to recognize that we are feeling something till later. Since I recognize incidents that I should angry in the delay isn't as bad and I'm able to channel the emotion into the situation (if it is productive).

[spielzeug]

Sometimes I intentionally delay emotions (like sadness) by pushing the related thoughts to the back of my head and concentrating on other tasks until I feel it's safe to let the feeling take hold.

I often repress emotions, but unlike you I never feel "safe" enough to bring the feelings out again. This is generally a very bad idea, since it often becomes too much to handle when it all comes seeping through. I do the same with e.g. crying; I'll cry for about three seconds, then I push it all down.

[brecia]

This is very true of myself. Any extreme emotion is only felt later--sometimes months later. I have had devastating events happen that have serious psychological effects, but I feel nothing but a dull ache or even a sick inner voice saying "the worst happened, I knew it would" , but the emotion is totally lost. It is not until months later I find myself sobbing, unable to sleep.

I am sure it isn't a healthy method and has sometimes gotten me in worse trouble, but I am unsure if I could survive such a blow, feeling it immediately.

i don't do it on purpose.i have no control over this delay.it is difficult this way but i'm sure i couldn't survive the other way around,too.

[KJacket]

Yup, I have a difference in delay for good and bad situations and in different situations serious or casual. Usually it feels like my emotions only come afterwards when I'm not thinking about anything in particular but in bad situations I analyze how to solve things first so there isn't much time or brain processing to feel about whats going on or what I'm going to do.

I agree with the "should I bother" thing, I mean, if I think about it, unless someone's watching, there's no need to show whether I'm happy or other emotions over a situation. And do they really need to know? Time to play politics card? show that you're happy to be polite?

Typically for me now, it's - I know what emotion I should be feeling although I don't feel it at the moment if ever later - and I act upon it logically to benefit myself if it matters. Different emotions might hit me later afterwards though. I've never dwelled on the after emotions though since I know that thinking (or feeling) them won't help about whats happened already.

[ProxyMe]

Strong positive emotions generally do not happen. I'll usually feel excessively content for awhile, but very few sudden bursts of enthusiasm.

As for the negative emotions, those are very much delayed. My father passed when I was 26, and it was over a year before I felt anything. I never cried, never felt the need to 'talk about it', simply displayed the typical INTJ stoic pose until I finished processing what it meant. Being female, this response was not readily accepted. All the same, emotions are handled differently in INTJs than other MBTI types. Sometimes the strong emotions simply take longer to understand and may be overwhelming for a time.

[Grotesque]

When my grandmother died I also couldn't cry. My sister couldn't believe that it happened, whereas I considered such possibility. I feel stron emotions, but very deeply, so that often I don't realize how strong impact a particular experience has on me. Perhaps this is not INTJ characteristic, but when I want to know what I feel, I have to write this. When I write, I always feel stronger, just as I think I should.

[Guybrush]

I've noticed that emotions have a delayed effect on me. When something bad happens, during the bad event, I'll feel practically nothing, but later on I'll start feeling the emotions that I should've felt. An example is something that happened today. About an hour ago I got a B on a test, which is probably the most disappointing thing that could've possible happened to me. When I initially got the test back, I felt nothing and even made jokes with my classmates. Now, about an hour later, I'm starting to get really angry and feeling a whole slew of negative emotions, but even now, I'm not feeling the full range of the emotions, and it will probably hit later in the day. There are a bunch of times in which this has happened. Has this happened to you?

My emotions get delayed sometimes. This is particularly true with negative emotions. It may be hours or days later before I get an emotional interpretation to a past event.

[brecia]

When my grandmother died I also couldn't cry. My sister couldn't believe that it happened, whereas I considered such possibility. I feel stron emotions, but very deeply, so that often I don't realize how strong impact a particular experience has on me. Perhaps this is not INTJ characteristic, but when I want to know what I feel, I have to write this. When I write, I always feel stronger, just as I think I should.

My condolences.
When an important thing like yours happened ;I can't understand my emotions,i feel nothing,a dull echo of sadness maybe but not on the surface and i can't even understand its presence,it feels like numbness.Then i start to wait something to fill the void.It is an anticipating phase actually.Because i know something is wrong.

I know!I found out that recently.I made conversations in my mind all the time nonstop! but i wrote that down this time .While i was writing i felt my emotions stronger more than i feel as you do, i felt mixed emotions , i felt lost etc... Now i know what is wrong with me.I'll decide what my solution will be soon, i'm still contemplating.But i feel at least relaxed.
And of course this forum really helped me to understand why i react the why i do.I didn't even have a clue about my personality. I understood that i seperated my logic and my emotions in my mind ,worst is i ignore my emotions.I do what situation requires , not what i want.I act like as if i have to act like that.No room for my desires,my feelings.

[Zsych]

Delayed effect. Emotions dismissed at will (if not too strong), emotions automatically pulled out of, after a while.

[ProxyMe]

Perhaps this is not INTJ characteristic, but when I want to know what I feel, I have to write this. When I write, I always feel stronger, just as I think I should.
Yes, I agree. Writing always helps me to sort out the many thoughts and internal conversations I have and usually help me identify which emotions I am or should be feeling when I am otherwise unable to express them.

[llBradll]

Any emotion I get starts off slight. Most of the time they die off, but every now and then I'll let them build and they'll have an effect later once they get bigger and more complex.

[curiousgeorge01]

I think certain emotions do take longer to process because the rational mind gets in the way. I remember as a child when someone first punched me in the face, my initial reaction was like this puzzled look on my face like "did that just happen?" He proceeded to hit me 3 more times before I walked away. I think he must've thought "what the hell is wrong with that kid?" LOL!

[Leon]

Emotions have an immediate physiological effect on me.