"Interrogation"-like conversation questions

[biased]

Have you ever had someone say it feels like you're interrogating the person in the manner you ask questions? The reason I think it comes off like this is because for me to understand how the person is I need a decent amount of information on them. So I continue to ask questions and it seems as though they don't really care about what I'm interested in or my stories since it doesn't apply to them. I don't blame them, human nature is selfish.

[Tegyrius]

Funny, when I read this topic line, I thought the question was going to be about the manner in which extroverts seem compelled to pry into other people's personal lives. ::)

[qwerty]

Nobody has specifically told me I interrogate them, however my conversation style is all about questions. Because I'm around allot of introverts I tend to push a conversation by questions that relate to myself.

[thegnat]

Funny, when I read this topic line, I thought the question was going to be about the manner in which extroverts seem compelled to pry into other people's personal lives. ::)

same here - a lot of times i feel interrogated by extroverts.

I like to ask a lot of questions but I ask them in my own mind. I don't usually ask them out loud.

I have conversation with people I can talk about a subject I know with. I don't usually ask questions unless i confess my thoughts. Sometimes I do though. Sometimes I answer questions with questions. That annoys people though sometimes. So I try not to ask questions.

I stay away from personal lives and am usually pretty quiet around extroverts knowing that they probably won't get my weird thought process.

[9 Guillotines]

Funny, when I read this topic line, I thought the question was going to be about the manner in which extroverts seem compelled to pry into other people's personal lives. ::)

Ah, my favorite. I especially love how frustrated they get when I respond to their "You don't talk very much. What are you thinking about?" question with "Uhm...Stuff?"

It usually sees them storm off in a huff and never talking to me again. That said...

Usually when I ask people questions, I try to be as direct as possible so that the other person knows exactly where I'm coming from (and will be able to give me an appropriate answer). I've been told by a few people that my questioning sometimes comes off as a bit "much"...and this is usually in the case of small talk, where chain-questioning isn't exactly necessary or appropriate. [cower...] Oops..?

I'm just not a very social butterfly and, thus, have no idea how to talk to people efficiently. :D

[Samoan Corleone]

Sometimes I use questions as a means of small talk, but there's evidence that get carried away when cousins that I haven't seen in a long time ask, "what's with all the questions?"

[deaconspire]

Yeah, I feel like I do this to people at times. It's usually when I am getting too much fluff and not enough facts in someone's explanation. Also, I can figure out the context in about 5 seconds, so I tend to ask very direct, specific questions that don't require a lot of explanation.

But I understand that some people are big talkers, so I try to be the patient listener too, but man that gets draining after awhile.

[Blse]

I'm cautious of doing this since open-ended questions are my main small-talk technique. Although I tend to give long-answers that include little ancedotes if appropriate. The trick is to share at the same pace that you're questions are answered. In some cases, you're the one doing most of the talking. That's the key to being a good conversationalist IMHO: striking the right balance between sharing and asking (which may tip either way depending on situation).

[INTJoe]

Funny, when I read this topic line, I thought the question was going to be about the manner in which extroverts seem compelled to pry into other people's personal lives. ::)

This. Especially re: ESFJs and ESTJs, etc.

I don't feel like I interrogate other people, and have never really been called out on it. I gain most of my reconnaisance by observation, rather than interrogation.

[MatthewZ]

Yes, many times have I heard that people feel like I'm interrogating them when I talk. However, this mostly occurs during online communication. (IRC, AIM, etc.) There was a time when I never talked. The "interrogation style" emerged when I started to actually initiate conversation.

[Mader]

I will use questions in a business environment daily, all day. I am trying to learn something. However, I prepare the victim before I start drilling for info - 'this is how I learn, I am not doubting your knowledge, blah, blah, blah'. Sometimes this works out OK, sometimes not.

[Zhen]

Have you ever had someone say it feels like you're interrogating the person in the manner you ask questions? The reason I think it comes off like this is because for me to understand how the person is I need a decent amount of information on them. So I continue to ask questions and it seems as though they don't really care about what I'm interested in or my stories since it doesn't apply to them. I don't blame them, human nature is selfish.

did it ever perhaps occur to you that asking one person a whole string of questions is selfish cos it means that person might feel like they have to give you a whole lot of information? The good thing is most extroverts recognise you're just interested and are happy to oblige- they love talking about themselves, lol.

I do the same interrogation thing as you by the way. It's also cos we can't stand shallow talk/boredom- some people like us just really like the nitty gritty- but it's not always appropriate to probe people you don't well yet...

[Third Eye]

Funny, when I read this topic line, I thought the question was going to be about the manner in which extroverts seem compelled to pry into other people's personal lives. ::)

Yeah I thought the same thing. I usually am on the end of interrogative questions.

[reckful]

I definitely have a tendency to go into "interviewer" mode -- especially when I'm just getting to know someone, but not only in that context. It's not that I won't do a fair amount of talking, but my talking will have a tendency to be reactions to what my "interviewee" is telling me, after which my next question will be what moves the conversation along. To put it another way, I have a tendency to try to lead a conversation, and do it in a way that the other person is the primary subject of the conversation.

ENFPs love this. ;D