View Full Version : I'm So Bored; Please Amuse Me - The Wrong Answer Game
10-04-2011, 01:08 PM
Actually no. It is .035mm out of alignment.
Why do cats sleep so much?
10-04-2011, 01:12 PM
You just don't sleep enough, the cats do.
Why am I bored?
10-04-2011, 01:33 PM
Because if you were nailed you wouldn't have to worry about where to sleep tonight.
Why do leaves change color in the fall?
Their color falls off.
Why do people brag about how much more they had to suffer in the olden days?
10-04-2011, 02:25 PM
Obviously they want you to invent a time machine to go back and fix it, but they are too shy to ask.
Why isn't knowledge an inherited trait?
10-04-2011, 04:38 PM
It is, but the birth process is so traumatic that babies forget everything. Think about it. The first thing you see when you're born is your mom's girl parts. Nasty.
Why is it a bad idea to eat yellow snow?
10-04-2011, 05:14 PM
Yellow snow contains toxic materials from nuclear reactors.
Why is first base on the right side of the infield?
10-04-2011, 07:29 PM
Players are mostly right-handed.
Why does bacon taste heavenly?
10-04-2011, 08:54 PM
It's from heaven, Pig heaven, but heaven none the less.
Why is 14 after 13?
Because their needs to be an end to Friday to 13th sequels because Friday the 14th would end Jason.
Why doesn't working out pay more?
10-05-2011, 05:58 AM
When will the financial system collapse?
10-05-2011, 08:01 AM
When INTJs in government will have a very bad day.
10-05-2011, 08:05 AM
Because your wi-fi connection sucks.
How can I master bathing?
10-05-2011, 08:22 AM
By learning judo in bath version.
What do you know?
10-05-2011, 02:41 PM
You are Oprah.
How can I get this song out of my head?
10-05-2011, 02:44 PM
By saying yourself that it disgusts God, your Lord.
Do you think it would change anything if people believed in Lord of the rings instead of Bible?
10-05-2011, 03:23 PM
What's for dinner?
10-05-2011, 03:39 PM
Data entry and statistics.
Where did the cat hide?
10-05-2011, 03:42 PM
Over there with the spoon.
Where is the center of the USA.
10-05-2011, 03:59 PM
Just ahead of the T, silly!
Why do bees like flowers?
10-05-2011, 04:03 PM
They own a flower shop in Toledo
Where is Toledo?
10-05-2011, 09:32 PM
In the eye of the tornado.
Why does a tornado spin?
10-05-2011, 09:40 PM
Because the rinse cycle is over.
How does a washing machine work?
10-05-2011, 09:56 PM
By the cycles.
Are barnacles necessary?
10-06-2011, 06:23 AM
Only if you like Barnacle Bill the Sailor.
Why doesn't chocolate grow on trees in Maine?
10-06-2011, 06:26 AM
Someone confiscated all the chocolates because he thinks everyone is diabetic too. :p (If I reveal his name I'll be multiply random murdered so ...)
Are there such a thing as sugar-free chocolates?
10-06-2011, 10:27 AM
Yes - they are used by the government to torture people.
Why do some bugs suck blood?
10-06-2011, 10:53 AM
They are anemic.
Why do mosquitos exist?
10-06-2011, 10:56 AM
They don't. We're just living in the Matrix so we think they exist.
Which stocks should i invest in?
10-06-2011, 11:09 AM
Ask Aliens. They know.
Is it possible to stop the time?
10-06-2011, 11:10 AM
Tuna stocks are a little fishy. I'd invest in Bulls.
Where do Tuna live?
10-06-2011, 11:12 AM
In Jurassic Park.
What is so nice about European Magpies?
10-06-2011, 11:17 AM
They're good with whipped cream.
Why did the chicjen cross the road?
10-06-2011, 01:43 PM
Because there wasn't a Starbucks on this side (yet).
Why do we need so many coffee shops?
10-06-2011, 02:08 PM
They're actually fronts for the Albainian Mob
Is there about to be another core member?
10-06-2011, 02:18 PM
No, since technically I don't have a 'member'.
Will people respect me more at 4,001?
10-06-2011, 02:23 PM
Sure. They'll be a parade too.
Should you hold your breath?
10-06-2011, 02:34 PM
Yes, I turn a lovely shade of blue.
Why are some weeks uphill battles and others just pass by unremarkably?
10-06-2011, 02:42 PM
Some weeks your going uphill.
Are you HappyToBeGracious now?
10-06-2011, 02:45 PM
Do you think that gay INTJs can make a good couple?
10-06-2011, 02:53 PM
Is there a reason you ask?
10-06-2011, 03:12 PM
Of course, I'm looking forward to marry an INTJ goat-beard which likes green colour.
What day is it?
10-06-2011, 03:30 PM
Where any trees harmed in the making of Arbor Day
10-06-2011, 04:37 PM
Yes. Tree huggers squeezed them too hard.
Will the Rolling Stones ever retire?
10-06-2011, 05:46 PM
No, they're going to live forever and continue to tour.
Did retirement kill Steve Jobs?
10-06-2011, 05:55 PM
No, it was mostly his turtle necks.
Is Steve Jobs now a ghost?
10-06-2011, 06:13 PM
He's going to be the new ghost in the machine.
Who was the old ghost in the machine?
10-06-2011, 07:25 PM
I'm parched. What kind of cocktail should I drink?
10-06-2011, 07:32 PM
Peacock tail. I hear its good.
Will any peacocks be harmed in the preparation?
10-06-2011, 07:37 PM
Yes, because I assume I have to milk one and you didn't say peaHEN so he's probably gonna get hurt.
Can you suggest anything with less plumage in it?
10-06-2011, 07:41 PM
Hitchcock! Practically no plumage.
Do you think he'll mind terribly?
10-06-2011, 07:50 PM
No, he's probably too dead to care. Unless you meant Robyn Hitchcock.
What's the best Hitchcock film?
10-06-2011, 07:56 PM
Can't remember any now. When I think of old B&W movies, I think of Bette Davis. Is that the one with those huge eyes? Some spooky movies she starred in.
Do you remember her? Edit: Do you even know her? :p
10-06-2011, 08:00 PM
yes. we worked together in a colorado sheriff's department.
what is oxidation?
10-06-2011, 08:16 PM
That's easy. Its the process where your skin changes color under the sun.
Why do dogs hate delivery men?
10-06-2011, 09:20 PM
Why does the Earth rotate?
10-06-2011, 10:23 PM
It is Atlas's doing.
Is Zeus in control?
10-07-2011, 01:25 AM
Zeus represents people in charge, so - here's your answer.
Do you think that lemons have parties when no one watches them?
10-07-2011, 05:05 AM
Are there any carts at the oil cartel?
10-07-2011, 09:52 AM
What time is it?
10-07-2011, 10:33 AM
Time is a part of the measuring system used to sequence events, to compare the durations of events and the intervals between them, and to quantify rates of change such as the motions of objects.
Where were we?
10-07-2011, 01:04 PM
I'm here and you're .... not. Are you?
Where are you?
10-07-2011, 01:22 PM
Someplace blessedly alone and NOT AT WORK.
Am I going to regret that I burned a random vacation day today?
10-07-2011, 01:25 PM
Of course you will. Enough to fall on your knife so you can get more paid days off in sick leave.
Why do spiders need 8 legs?
10-07-2011, 01:33 PM
It helps them to build webs at face level so that I can unsuspectingly walk through them.
Why aren't they known as octonids instead of arachnids?
10-07-2011, 03:24 PM
Octomom copyrighted the octo prefix.
What's the longest word in the English language?
10-07-2011, 04:34 PM
Language since it's 8 letters. "The" is only 3 letters and "English" is 7 letters.
Why can't polar bears fly?
10-07-2011, 05:09 PM
all flighted animals are porous, and we all know you can't pour water through a bear.
why would someone put a feather in their cap?
10-07-2011, 06:37 PM
To pay homage to Carmen Miranda
Why would someone put fruit in their pants?
10-07-2011, 06:56 PM
body warmth has been proven to slow the aging of ripe fruit, and most human parasites will also eat fruit mites.
why don't moths like cedar?
10-07-2011, 07:00 PM
Moths are Cedar bigots. They also hate apples and woopie pies.
Are there any moths in Lebanon?
10-07-2011, 07:04 PM
lebanon tennessee? nope, i think i ran over the last moth in all of wilson county last thursday.
what is an orange julius?
10-07-2011, 07:09 PM
An emperor who used that knock off tanning cream.
Who was the dumbest emperor?
10-07-2011, 10:30 PM
The one with no clothes. What the hell, right?
What is that stuff in my bellybutton and how did it get there?
10-07-2011, 11:56 PM
Orange lichen and you don't want to know how it got there.
Why does Nantucket Briar smells good?
10-08-2011, 01:28 AM
Because you were brainwashed.
10-08-2011, 01:53 AM
Because I wanted to sing like a nightingale?
Is that unfair?
10-08-2011, 02:12 AM
Well, it can always disgust the Lord, your God, don't you know?
Do you think INTJ are likeable?
10-08-2011, 05:52 AM
I am likable, aren't I?
10-08-2011, 10:37 AM
Most dogs seem to think they are lick-able.
Is life just a hallucination?
10-08-2011, 10:43 AM
Please pass the anti-psychotics and I'll let you know.
Could I bottle today's weather to enjoy in December?
10-08-2011, 10:46 AM
You could not bottle anything, since birds do not have hands. (duh)
Does wind break?
10-08-2011, 10:52 AM
No. Only tides break.
Is high tide in the morning or the evening?
10-08-2011, 10:57 AM
Mine is high every morning. Nothing I can do to prevent it.
Where is everyone, it's Saturday?
10-08-2011, 11:02 AM
I'm not telling you since you are implying that present company is inadequate.
Shouldn't I be off doing whatever they're all doing right now?
10-08-2011, 11:07 AM
I'm not answering since you are implying whatever we do here is not enough.
What are they doing?
10-08-2011, 11:11 AM
They're off on a business meeting.
Do INTJs have feelings?
10-08-2011, 11:14 AM
Yes: hunger and constipation.
Why are there so many languages on earth?
10-08-2011, 11:16 AM
^^ No, all humans are just robots living in matrix, yeah.
^ Because of the Babylon and Gods disgust, don't you know that?
Why is it so hard for INTJs to express emotions?
10-08-2011, 11:30 AM
Their faces were paralyzed at the birth.
Is there a God?
10-08-2011, 01:18 PM
Ask a priest. Priests and just people. They can tell you the truth.
What is so disguising about British snobs?
10-08-2011, 06:02 PM
What's the matter with baby Jane?
10-08-2011, 08:33 PM
The same thing as other babies, crying and whining all the time.
Why don't I own a helicopter?
10-09-2011, 01:11 AM
Because you're not an American snob (and thank you for that)...
Why do people say "cheese" when someone takes a picture of them?
10-09-2011, 01:46 AM
Good Point! "Camera Cheesing" is now banned. As of today, anyone who wants their picture taken will have to say "Mooooo!"
Why isn't anyone taking my picture now?
10-09-2011, 11:41 AM
You're hiding behind a dog.
Is absolute zero cold?
10-09-2011, 11:57 AM
in winter, yes. but when the humidity is up, absolute zero is little more than normal zero.
african or european?
10-09-2011, 12:00 PM
Well, you have to know these things when you're a king, you know.
What really happened to Sharon Tate?
10-09-2011, 12:02 PM
the invitation said "free abortion" and her money was tight.
what's the deal with gerald ford and lynette fromme?
10-09-2011, 01:37 PM
They're human beings who have stood directly under the Earth's sun.
Why is blues music so negative?
10-09-2011, 02:17 PM
in the eastern roman empire, there was a conflict between two corps of charioteers; one called the blues the other called the greens. the greens were usually victorious, which is why the blues are so often forlorn.
what does 'beef byproducts' mean?
10-09-2011, 02:43 PM
It's what gets produced after a big beefy defensive lineman has dinner.
To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 15 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
Who is going to clean up the beef byproducts?
10-09-2011, 02:46 PM
what is a pendulum?
10-09-2011, 02:59 PM
It's a device installed in grandfather clocks to hypnotize children when their parents get tired of watching them. Since TV was invented they've become outdated and none have been made for 30 years.
Why won't stores accept my Monopoly money?
10-09-2011, 03:06 PM
when used outside of monopolia, the bills have a lower cash value than charmin coupons.
why do so many folk hate successful people?
10-09-2011, 04:31 PM
Because it makes them successful too.
Why is life complicated?
What should I name my next pet?
10-09-2011, 05:13 PM
What is love?
Programming language for a perpetual motion machine.
What will be your epitaph?
10-09-2011, 06:18 PM
"I’m not sure what lobsters eat, but I think they eat like insects or something… so I was gonna feed them worms."
How will the human race die off?
Lack of curiosity.
Ever see a grown man naked?
10-09-2011, 06:36 PM
No; how do you grow a man-naked? Sounds interesting.
What do you get when you cross a dog with a cat?
Feelings. Modern religious art.
What is wisdom?
10-09-2011, 06:58 PM
Looking down the chips aisle and picking the bag with the brightest colors.
Why did Germany bail out Greece?
10-09-2011, 07:38 PM
i think they have their eyes on cypress again, this time through capital expansion.
why does history repeat?
10-09-2011, 07:41 PM
Because no one's smart enough to press stop.
Is that rapping Gollum in your avi?
10-09-2011, 09:51 PM
Yes. The man who acted as Gollum is reiven. You are looking at a movie star.
Is acting difficult?
10-09-2011, 10:02 PM
No. Acting comes naturally to those who lie often.
Why can't I just get this homework done and over with?
10-09-2011, 11:02 PM
Perhaps you are distracted
Is the Internet a distraction?
10-09-2011, 11:06 PM
Of course not! Its an attraction.
Are you compelled like I am, to play games everyday?
10-09-2011, 11:07 PM
No, I never play.
Do you believe me?
10-09-2011, 11:14 PM
Would it disappoint you terribly if I don't?
Are you sobbing?
10-09-2011, 11:18 PM
Yes. Big Crocodile tears.
Do you care?
10-09-2011, 11:24 PM
Oh yes, weeping like a willow ~~~ *sniffs*
Did I have you fooled?
10-09-2011, 11:26 PM
Is there something over there?
10-09-2011, 11:29 PM
Just Gerard91 talking to his European magpie.
How are magpies awesome?
10-10-2011, 12:02 AM
Well, there's pie.
If a rotunda is half a sphere, is the other half a downunder?
10-10-2011, 12:22 AM
No. It's a cylinder.
Was Australia always down under?
10-10-2011, 02:50 AM
No. It was originally north of Canada.
Is there a breeze in here?
No. It's Dutch Renaissance.
What's the difference between an ass, and mule?
10-10-2011, 03:19 AM
An ass can be negotiated with.
Do you ever sleep?
Is insomnia a sign of guilt?
Does anyone ever give a shit?
10-10-2011, 03:33 AM
Yes, otherwise there'd be an explosion and I'm not cleaning it up.
Is that a wrong answer or just a play on words?
Phonemes are the smallest unit of meaningful sound used to create words.
Why can't I focus?
10-10-2011, 04:07 AM
someone smeared baby oil on your glasses.
why has the past year gone by so quickly?
Because Santa isn't real.
What is the difference between emotions and assumptions?
10-10-2011, 05:28 AM
Emotions are assumptions gone wrong.
Are you smiling at my wrong answer?
10-10-2011, 07:52 AM
No, I only show my teeth to my dentist.
Why couldn't the hospital be more conveniently located?
Because we die there.
Why can't I sleep?
10-10-2011, 11:29 AM
Because you're awake.
Why do I have to be infected by other people's negative emotions?
10-10-2011, 01:42 PM
Because doctors are still working on a cure.
Why is the work week 40 hours a week?
Oh wait I know this one! Is it because he's a Douche-Lord?
Why are we here?
10-10-2011, 03:07 PM
Here = nowhere. The Internet is a "non-space". It has no particular use to anyone.
Why do you remind me of someone I met today?
Because, I'm God. I'm everywhere;)
Why is a genuine person hard to find?
10-10-2011, 04:42 PM
Because most people are part neanderthal.
Why does Superman wear his underwear on the outside?
10-10-2011, 05:14 PM
because superman is actually a secret identity for captain american. he changes his red drawers for white, slips on his lucha libre mask, pulls his shield out of his trunk, swaps the chest logo and presto, captain america.
what is a facet?
Its a chunk of your body removed and extracted for the purposes of scientific/medical endeavors that your tax money helps pay for (the extraction), but will not be returned as it is an obligation of you to give of yourself to your country.
What's the difference between humans and animals?
10-10-2011, 11:18 PM
Humans had to talk. Animals don't.
Does animals engage in small talks?
10-11-2011, 12:10 AM
Well I know for sure that dogs make small barks.
If God exists and it rains does that mean that he pees on us?
10-11-2011, 12:21 AM
Some people call that acid rain.
Can you pee when you're really angry?
10-11-2011, 06:52 AM
No, but I can fling poop.
Why do cats sleep so much?
10-11-2011, 06:54 AM
Because it is their natural behaviour.
Why is nature so complex?
10-11-2011, 08:05 AM
To keep humans from messing with it.
Why are humans so aggressive?
10-11-2011, 10:36 AM
Because being nice was boring.
Why did the dinosaurs die?
10-11-2011, 10:41 AM
Because dinosaurs never existed!
Why don't we have warp engines?
10-11-2011, 10:41 AM
They didn't. The aliens took them. They left those fake skeletons behind on a lark.
Why haven't human bodies evolved more? (and/or have warp engines?)
10-11-2011, 01:31 PM
Human bodies are perfect. There isn't any place to evolve to.
Why haven't warp engines evolved more?
10-11-2011, 01:39 PM
Engineers deliberately designed flawed warp engines so people would have to pay to get them repaired.
What is the fastest way to become famous?
10-11-2011, 01:41 PM
Mooning the White House.
What's the fastest way to get arrested?
10-11-2011, 02:30 PM
Vote for any politician.
Why do we still use Microsoft Windows?
10-11-2011, 02:44 PM
Laziness and mental ineptitude.
Why is chocolate so popular?
10-11-2011, 02:48 PM
Because people believe in its popularity.
Why is it so hard to make your own way?
10-11-2011, 02:52 PM
Bushwhacking is too easy.
Where do houseflies come from?
10-11-2011, 03:58 PM
Horse flies were a military project to combine flies with horse dna to make a Pegasus type horse [with fly wings]. Initially project Pegasus used dove dna and an assortment of other birds resulting in horribly disfigured horses and birds [you should see the pigeon horse]. Someone suggested injecting a fly with horse dna, after coming to the lab from the bar. This man used to the lab to produce meth, and grow genetically engineered mary-jane. He often had stupid ideas.
No one stopped him, in fear he'd no longer share his drugs if they did. And then came horse flies. A few excaped and began to populate. Project Pegasus sold the rights to their company name to Marvel comics.
Where do babies come from?
10-11-2011, 04:11 PM
Trenton, New Jersey.
Where do storks come from?
10-11-2011, 06:00 PM
the really good ones come from greenland. there is a factory in mossberg mn., but union rules limit production to a few dozen per year.
why is a sideways number 8 the symbol for infinity?
10-11-2011, 06:22 PM
A sideways 7 hurts when you fall on it.
How big is infinity?
10-11-2011, 06:24 PM
3.62 cubic yards in powder form, or about 6 liters for liquid infinity.
how does a potato become vodka?
10-11-2011, 06:26 PM
How does Vodka make you drunk?
10-11-2011, 10:30 PM
By making your head swim.
Why is it difficult to swim against the current?
10-12-2011, 12:20 AM
Because the flying spaghetti monster was bored and wanted entertainment. So He decided that swimming against the current would be more difficult. Now he watches those who try while drinking natural ice and laughing his drunk ass off.
Why did spider-man need web shooters?
To keep off another annoying sequel and/or spider-man remake.
Why do many church attendees ignore the sin of gluttony?
10-12-2011, 10:24 AM
The same reason they also have premarital sex. If God didn't want us to, it wouldn't be so darned delicious.
Why are there so many churches?
10-12-2011, 10:53 AM
It's a tax dodge
Why are there so many people in churches?
10-12-2011, 11:23 AM
Because it advances technology. Recent studies have shown an increase in the amount of churches in the world as well as an increase in technological advances. People go to church in hopes that a new smart phone will come out that has a beer app.
Why are most of the answers in this game so short?
10-12-2011, 11:30 AM
Is single dot an answer to anything?
10-12-2011, 11:39 AM
Brevity is the soul of wit.
Why does the sun come up?
10-12-2011, 12:46 PM
The moon gets tired and needs someone to take over.
Why is Oregon rainy?
10-12-2011, 12:52 PM
It's all Cooper's fault.
Why is there a line in the middle of the road?
10-12-2011, 12:55 PM
To orient the chicken.
Why are piano keys black and white?
10-12-2011, 12:57 PM
They were invented before color TV, so it didn't matter.
Does matter, matter?
10-12-2011, 12:57 PM
^^ Because pianists are racists.
^ Yes, if it's mattress.
Why is the medieval devil green?
10-12-2011, 01:04 PM
It's an evolutionary adaptation to the sun, which allows him to roam during the day and perform Photosynthysis.
---------- Post added 10-12-2011 at 11:04 AM ----------
It's an evolutionary adaptation to the sun, which allows him to roam during the day and perform Photosynthysis.
Where did I put my question?
10-12-2011, 01:24 PM
You hid it under your pillow.
Why are questions so difficult to think up on demand?
10-12-2011, 01:30 PM
It has something to do with gravity and the Doppler effect and PI and Pie.
Aren't answers harder?
10-12-2011, 01:35 PM
Most questions are made of concrete.
Do questions need to be harder than that?
10-12-2011, 01:37 PM
Yes. Code dictates questions have to be made from Titanium.
Why do we have codes?
10-12-2011, 01:40 PM
To obfuscate explanation.
Why are kittens so cute?
10-12-2011, 02:18 PM
So they can guilt trip you into feeding them.
Why do people believe in astrology?
10-12-2011, 06:03 PM
Because of all the documented evidence. Haven't you ever read Hawking?
Why doesn't "The Little Prince" take place in Europe?
Because the right answers take longer.
What does having a complex mean?
10-12-2011, 08:02 PM
It means you're in math class working with complex numbers (To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 15 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.).
Why is everything so complicated?
Why are boys stubborn?
10-13-2011, 12:13 AM
*openly admits to laughing out loud at this question*
Boys are born with a stubborn gene that resides right next to the maps are for pansies gene which butts up against the Yes, love GPS gene. It all makes me want to go..WTF? ;)
Why are girls stubborn?
They learned it by whatching YOU! *egg frying sizzle*
Why do people suck?
10-13-2011, 06:27 PM
It's a necessary part of respiration.
What was the real deal between Freud and his mother?
10-14-2011, 12:00 AM
How complex was Oedipus?
10-14-2011, 01:19 AM
I think he was as complicated as his name is.
Why the hell I don't care about anything?
10-14-2011, 01:31 AM
Because you need to care about something first and not anything.
Why aren't there more bossa nova albums?
10-14-2011, 05:17 AM
hitler burned them
why do prisoners make street signs?
To keep their street credibility in check so they can avoid sagging their pants in prison giving off inadvisable implications - that has unfortunately been an undying trend carried over into the secular/mainstream world increasing same sex physicality.
Why has the intelligence indicators in rap music declined as time has progressed over the last eleven years?
10-14-2011, 05:36 AM
Most of the intelligent ones have been shot.
What is the best way to protect oneself from electric shocks?
Drop out of society and live in the woods.
Where is Sesame Street located?
10-14-2011, 06:45 AM
Yellow Brick Road
Where is Narnia?
10-14-2011, 12:43 PM
In central Maine.
What is knowledge good for?
10-14-2011, 12:51 PM
It can be used to create treehouses.
What is partying good for?
10-14-2011, 12:58 PM
Keeping the rabble amused so they don't bother us.
Why do some candles burn so poorly?
10-14-2011, 01:10 PM
You lit the wrong end.
Why do some calories burn so poorly?
10-14-2011, 01:37 PM
Because the person with the calories makes less than $20,000 salary.
Will penguins talk someday?
10-14-2011, 04:05 PM
They already do. Just not to you.
Is there a maximum?
10-14-2011, 08:51 PM
No, but there is a minimax.
What will be the next innovation in airport security?
10-14-2011, 10:46 PM
Beating the crap out of you with kicking and fists.
What will be the next innovation in predicting the weather?
10-15-2011, 12:10 AM
iWeather, a gadget you hold up in the air. In an instant it gives you the weather conditions (not forecast) for the next 48 hours. Jobs was working secretly on the iWeather technology at his basement before his untimely death.
How much did Jobs contribute anonymously to charitable organisation?
By giving more jobs so people could get a bite out the big apple.
Why did Bill keep some of Steve's jobs within his gates?
10-15-2011, 11:43 AM
ETo view links or images in this forum your post count must be 15 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. I would have thought Steve was the bottom in this one... anyways eTo view links or images in this forum your post count must be 15 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
Where are the best matches?
10-15-2011, 12:21 PM
You silly. They're in the matchbox.
Where is the Ea Tea?
10-15-2011, 02:34 PM
55 miles northwest of copenhagen.
Why is the earth round?
10-15-2011, 03:17 PM
Because that's the fashion this year. Next year it will have big lapels and a white belt.
Is there a parallel universe? Am I better in that one?
10-15-2011, 03:40 PM
Parallel universes are so last year. This year it's all about serial universes.
Why is life a four-letter word?
10-15-2011, 03:42 PM
Because we refuse to speak french and call it "vie" as Dieu intended.
Do the Finnish have any curses that are actually only 4 letters?
All really important and upsetting things are, or can be...
Why are humans so misunderstood and alone even when they're together?
10-15-2011, 03:46 PM
Many Finns send more than 4 letters of curses to the customer service of polar bear nursing homes. The service is that bad.
Why did they arrange the cities of Toronto, Ottawa and Montreal in such an order geographically, that the initials form a name; TOM? :suspicious:
SNAKED, sorry next one answer ^ the lady with green hair, above
10-15-2011, 03:56 PM
To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 15 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
It is a tribute to our beloved Tommy Douglas, who is credited with our outstanding medical system.
Why do more countries not follow our lead on this?
10-15-2011, 04:00 PM
^^^ It's because we get snaked all the time by technology being slow.
^ Many countries follow lead. To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 15 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
Where is now?
10-15-2011, 04:06 PM
I have it.
Did you want some?
10-15-2011, 04:08 PM
I always want some.
Who's on First?
10-15-2011, 04:12 PM
I believe it was Hardy, but perhaps Costello. Both wanted to be sorted first.
Why are pistachios green?
10-15-2011, 04:13 PM
Because I boiled them first.
What's on TV?
10-15-2011, 08:39 PM
Dust on the TV screen.
What is the biggest city in the United States?
Why are bottom-feeders of the sea considered fine dining?
Could it be because butter and garlic go so well together...
Why are research papers so dull to write?
10-16-2011, 04:16 AM
It's a chain of boredom. The first research person back in the stone age started the serious boring style as a joke, and as others needed a cross-reference, it spread like a disease.
Are polar bears really bipolar (To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 15 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.)?
10-16-2011, 05:00 AM
Yes, and they go to a psychiatrist on a biweekly basis.
How many pairs of shoes do you own?
10-16-2011, 05:43 AM
None. Just a pair of sandals.
How many Hawaiian shirts do you own.
10-16-2011, 05:57 AM
Why does certain sound annoy?
They block other information from being processed consciously and/or comfortably.
How would the world change if the homeless population were given the position of running the world?
10-16-2011, 11:45 AM
I'm guessing it would be a marked improvement.
How do we really chose our leaders?
10-16-2011, 12:09 PM
Face value, no points taken.
What if a beaver was in charge of Canada?
10-16-2011, 12:23 PM
The lumber industry would fuel the economy.
What is a good way to become less bored?
10-16-2011, 12:25 PM
Go jump off a cliff.
Why do we have time zones?
10-16-2011, 12:26 PM
^^Become bulletin board.
^ To keep the people of Newfoundland confused.
Why are people so grumpy at the supermarket?
10-16-2011, 12:39 PM
Because they do not want to see a Bollywood movie.
Who the fuck invented reality TV?
10-16-2011, 01:52 PM
Who will win the World Series?
10-16-2011, 02:17 PM
Why can't trains fly?
10-16-2011, 02:26 PM
They can fly, but with all of the FAA red tape it just isn't economically feasible.
Why does Wile E. Coyote keep buying supplies from ACME when they always fail.
10-16-2011, 02:52 PM
For the same reason people vote.
You walk to an intersection, do not know which road to take to the city. You see a person you know to be one of the identical twins of whom the other one always lies, and the other always tells the truth. How do you ask which road to take to the city, if you only are allowed to ask one question?
10-16-2011, 08:56 PM
"In which pocket is my GPS?"
How many sets of identical twins do you know IRL?
10-16-2011, 09:00 PM
Why doesn't everyone beleive in the Easter Bunny
10-16-2011, 09:02 PM
Because the Easter Bunny goes around killing anyone who believes in him.
Why is football popular?
10-17-2011, 08:10 AM
Because footballs are made of chocolate.
Why to flees breed?
vBulletin® v3.8.7, Copyright ©2000-2013, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.