View Full Version : I'm So Bored; Please Amuse Me - The Wrong Answer Game
IronSulfide
07-24-2011, 01:48 PM
Henry T. Polka, the famous Victorian harlequin.
What can we do to stop people from sticking their used chewing gum under desks, chairs, and other available surfaces?
thebrainpolice
07-24-2011, 03:43 PM
Smear grease under those surfaces. This way the gum won't stick.
How can I make a million dollars quickly?
reiven
07-24-2011, 05:16 PM
redeem all of your coupons for their face value
how do i achieve deification?
GettingBetter
07-24-2011, 06:10 PM
Run for public office and talk about God a lot. Also, lowering taxes.
How can we lower the US debt?
reiven
07-24-2011, 06:15 PM
give our soldiers bouquets instead of rifles.
no one wants to harm us anyway.
what causes odor?
Sprelious
07-24-2011, 06:55 PM
The Norse god of odor, Noxious
How many words are thete in the english Language?
venuspop
07-24-2011, 09:00 PM
One. And it's mine!
What is that One Word?
reiven
07-25-2011, 03:09 AM
thete- (n) a possession of dubious distinction. revered by few or none.
what ever happened to popeye?
UnrulyR3d
07-25-2011, 03:31 AM
Opened up a chain of southern style fried chicken restaurants.
Where is Olive now?
reiven
07-25-2011, 04:41 AM
she was compressed into virgin oil
(sweet pea was adopted)
what is it about her eyes?
mmMMMMMmmmmm
momorawr
07-25-2011, 07:12 AM
She's been practicing her hypnotizing powers.
What mind powers do you have?
gracious
07-25-2011, 09:12 AM
Nuclear and hydroelectric.
Why should I use those twirly new lightbulbs?
momorawr
07-25-2011, 09:18 AM
They protect you from whirlpools.
Have you ever stapled your finger?
gracious
07-25-2011, 09:21 AM
No, I usually keep my staples (milk, eggs, bread) in the refrigerator.
Do you think I have prepared sufficiently for my 1:00 meeting?
momorawr
07-25-2011, 12:40 PM
The only appropriate way to prepare for a 1:00 meeting is to eat 2 dozen donuts and sleep till noon. I'm going to with yes.
You keep your bread in the fridge?
Sprelious
07-25-2011, 12:49 PM
Yes. I keep all my money in the fridge.
You keep your ear to the ground?
momorawr
07-25-2011, 12:57 PM
I'm in a never ending game of cowboys and Indians.
You keep half of your face shadowed?
Sprelious
07-25-2011, 01:02 PM
I'm duplicitious
Why do you have wings?
momorawr
07-25-2011, 01:05 PM
All ninjas have wings.
Why are you staring at me?
Sprelious
07-25-2011, 01:10 PM
I'm not starring. I have a stiff neck and can't turn away.
Are you going to San Francisco?
momorawr
07-25-2011, 01:15 PM
I think I've been asked this question before. No, I'm going to Copenhagen via Cape Town.
Are you going to San Francisco?
Sprelious
07-25-2011, 01:18 PM
No, I can't find any flowers for my hair.
Can you spare some flowers?
momorawr
07-25-2011, 01:42 PM
I have a rafflesia garden out back. I don't think you want to put them in your hair though.
Have you ever been to a nudist colony in California?
Sprelious
07-25-2011, 02:08 PM
No one wants to see that
Do you know Tinkerbell?
thebrainpolice
07-25-2011, 03:52 PM
Yeah, she works at the local strip club.
How much do strippers make?
gracious
07-25-2011, 05:27 PM
A couple hundred cubic metres per fortnight.
What do I need to know about the game of cricket?
venuspop
07-25-2011, 09:04 PM
The loudest cricket almost always have deadly antennaes.
How about a game of grass-hopping?
GettingBetter
07-26-2011, 05:25 PM
You are now the proud owner of a board game called grass-hopping for $25. It provides hours of entertainment, because nobody understands the point of the game.
Does anyone play board games anymore?
venuspop
07-26-2011, 11:24 PM
Like on a surfboard?
What is the first board game ever created?
Sprelious
07-26-2011, 11:28 PM
Monopoly; As long as there has been a human race there has been a desire to have it all.
Will anyone win the human race?
venuspop
07-26-2011, 11:31 PM
Yes, the rats!
Does rats race in the rat race?
Sprelious
07-26-2011, 11:35 PM
No. Rats are not allowed in any race. They always stop for garbage and never manage to finish.
Do the Finnish, finish
venuspop
07-26-2011, 11:43 PM
From what I hear, they finally finished but by then they were finished.
What does swiss roll and swiss watches have in common?
Sprelious
07-26-2011, 11:54 PM
They're both filled with cream.
What do french fries and George W. Bush have in common?
UnrulyR3d
07-26-2011, 11:56 PM
Both are greasy. Sorry, I am out of practice.
Where have all the unicorns gone?
Sprelious
07-27-2011, 12:02 AM
The Unicorns all got together and went to a little island in the Carribean.
What is the name of the Unicorn's island
(they're both greasy is a great answer)
venuspop
07-27-2011, 12:04 AM
Thousand Island.
Who created the Thousand Island?
Sprelious
07-27-2011, 01:20 AM
Robert Frost
Where is the road less traveled?
gracious
07-27-2011, 05:40 PM
Probably Montserrat.
When is the rapture?
thebrainpolice
07-27-2011, 05:47 PM
It already happened. You are not one of the saved. Haha.
Who will be the President of the U.S. in 20 years?
gracious
07-27-2011, 05:55 PM
The U.S. will not exist in 20 years. Justin Bieber will be the supreme commander of the People's Republic of Chimerica.
Should I invest in a new hobby?
New hobbies are going down in value, so you may want to hold off on investing your money.
How many seashells does Sally sell at the seashore?
IronSulfide
07-27-2011, 07:00 PM
Five before she is busted by the cops for running an unregistered business.
If I ran a lemonade stand, what could I do to boost sales?
thebrainpolice
07-27-2011, 07:05 PM
Spike the lemonade with whiskey.
Why do monkeys fling poop when they get mad?
venuspop
07-27-2011, 10:21 PM
They learn it from us. ummm.... not me, though. :)
Why does forum brawls happen?
Distance
07-27-2011, 10:25 PM
Forum brawls don't really happen. It's just a ritualised way for similar individuals to bond. First it's arguing on the Internet, next come the real life meet ups where everyone carries a knife.
Why do people put animals made out wires, on their front lawn?
venuspop
07-27-2011, 10:34 PM
Why, that's easy. To scare the crows.
Does it always work?
Bobsama
07-27-2011, 11:29 PM
Of course! Haven't you seen how fidgety the crows?
Are you (the next poster) a woman?
Sprelious
07-28-2011, 12:38 AM
Maybe after the operation.
Should I buy Gold?
venuspop
07-28-2011, 01:38 AM
Absolutely. If you don't, who will?
What is more useful. food or gold?
Sprelious
07-28-2011, 02:02 AM
Gold, you can't eat food.
Which is better, yin or yang?
venuspop
07-28-2011, 02:25 AM
Yin because it came first.
Why is it almost always never quoted as "yang and yin"?
reiven
07-28-2011, 02:38 AM
yang and yin™ is a chinese ice cream company with a team of lawyers just itching for an copyright infringement suit.
why am i always so stiff when i wake up?
Sprelious
07-28-2011, 02:40 AM
Sex dreams
What is the shortest distance between two points?
reiven
07-28-2011, 02:50 AM
federal debt
should they compromise?
Bobsama
07-28-2011, 05:10 AM
Yes! And they should cut everyone else's salaries before their own!
Why must I ask a question?
venuspop
07-28-2011, 05:39 AM
I don't have to answer that and I won't!!
Why did i?
thebrainpolice
07-28-2011, 07:07 AM
The voices in your head told you to.
Why do the voices in my head tell me to do bad things?
momorawr
07-28-2011, 07:28 AM
You don't use enough yam paste on your toast.
Why do bananas turn brown?
Bobsama
07-28-2011, 08:27 AM
Because you looked at them.
If a tree falls and there's nobody around to hear it, does it make a sound?
momorawr
07-28-2011, 08:56 AM
It sounds like a cat in a blender.
Why do cats have hair?
Sprelious
07-28-2011, 09:48 AM
Have you ever seen one shaved. That clearly must be covered.
Why do cats have tails?
IronSulfide
07-28-2011, 10:09 AM
To knock over fragile knick-knacks.
Why is Pluto no longer a planet?
Sprelious
07-28-2011, 10:11 AM
It was inevitable once a dog was named after it.
Why is Jupiter so big?
IronSulfide
07-28-2011, 10:14 AM
Thyroid problem.
Where can you buy 9XL lingerie?
Sprelious
07-28-2011, 10:16 AM
On Jupiter, If you have a thyroid problem.
Why does the sun set in the west?
gracious
07-28-2011, 04:36 PM
To recalibrate your compass.
How do Magic 8 balls work?
reiven
07-28-2011, 04:50 PM
sea monkeys on long, rotating shifts.
why are the seasons different on each side of the equator?
gracious
07-28-2011, 04:54 PM
So that brussels sprouts are always in season somewhere.
Where does the water go when I wash my face?
Bobsama
07-28-2011, 07:03 PM
Back into your bladder.
Is Obama an American?
Sprelious
07-28-2011, 10:17 PM
No, He's an African American
Was Obama born the U.S.?
venuspop
07-28-2011, 11:57 PM
No. He was born in a hospital.
Is it true that he was butt handled before he made his first cry?
Sprelious
07-29-2011, 12:53 AM
No, but he was spanked.
Do you think it hurt?
venuspop
07-29-2011, 02:43 AM
I don't think so. It took several spanks before he cried.
Do you think it was a loud cry?
momorawr
07-29-2011, 07:31 AM
No it sounded a little like a goat.
Was he breast fed?
Bobsama
07-29-2011, 08:03 AM
Probably not. He's not Bill Clinton.
Did he wear cloth diapers or disposable diapers?
gracious
07-29-2011, 09:39 AM
They were paper. He was wrapped in the constitution.
Who should play him in the movie?
IronSulfide
07-29-2011, 10:12 AM
Robert Downey Jr.
Who is the mastermind of the Tea Party?
Bobsama
07-29-2011, 10:39 AM
Why George W. Bush, of course!
Wait, did I mean Ron Paul?
Sprelious
07-29-2011, 11:40 AM
No his mother tried but his ears got in the way.
What's the deal with those ears?
thebrainpolice
07-29-2011, 02:48 PM
He is part elephant.
Where do libertarians come from?
The closet leading to Narnia.
How many fingers am I holding up?
IronSulfide
07-29-2011, 06:00 PM
Twelve.
Why are there so few bakeries?
Bobsama
07-29-2011, 06:38 PM
Because nobody likes bread.
Vodka or rum?
momorawr
07-29-2011, 07:25 PM
goats blood with a dash of whiskey.
Where does kettle corn come from?
UnrulyR3d
07-29-2011, 07:48 PM
Leprechauns. The truth behind the "gold" at the end of the rainbow.
Who invented sushi?
Sprelious
07-29-2011, 11:26 PM
Sushi was actually invented by Versace. It was a failed attemt at naking eye glasses out of raw fish.
If there's popcorn at the end of the rainbow then where's the gold?
SouloftheLaurel
07-29-2011, 11:29 PM
It got eaten up by the cow.
Why do girls wear leggings as pants?
Sprelious
07-29-2011, 11:36 PM
Their pants are in the wash.
Why do girls wear clothes that leave their bra staps exposed?
Bobsama
07-30-2011, 05:56 AM
Because they've figured out that bare shoulders are a really big turn-off.
Where did these 2 small cuts come from?
Sprelious
07-30-2011, 08:46 AM
From the cut fairy. You must have been good, you got two.
Why does this laptop hate me so much?
Bobsama
07-30-2011, 08:49 AM
Because you're overprotective.
Why doesn't MTV play any music videos?
Because they have commercials for you to watch. Buy more. Think less. Make money. Spend.
Where's the best place to look if you lose your mind?
Bobsama
07-30-2011, 09:45 AM
A zombie's stomach.
Is a conversationalist pro-cannibalism or anti-cannibalism?
Sprelious
07-30-2011, 11:03 AM
I don't listen to conversationalists, but they eat me up.
If you're stranded on a desert island can you really make a phone out of coconuts?
GettingBetter
07-30-2011, 11:15 AM
Yes. But only the cellular type. The hair on the coconuts transmits messages to the nearest satellite. That's a problem if it's not a satellite for sending phone messages, though.
How many strands are there on a desert island?
Sprelious
07-30-2011, 01:47 PM
Five. The mason's laid them out in a pentagram.
Do the Mason's really have a secret agenda?
IronSulfide
07-30-2011, 01:53 PM
No, but they do have a killer secret sauce.
Where can I acquire a pentagram with which to adorn my entranceway?
Sprelious
07-30-2011, 01:55 PM
Pentagrams r us. Right between the Verizon store and the Ruby Tuesdays.
Why do malls exist and can we kill them?
IronSulfide
07-30-2011, 01:58 PM
It's a survival of the fittest thing. You can kill one if you'd like, but three more will spring up in its place.
What would I find if I went to Jersey Shore?
Bobsama
07-30-2011, 02:14 PM
Sand fleas.
Why would anyone want to go down to the Jersey Shore?
IronSulfide
07-30-2011, 02:23 PM
To hunt down Snooki.
Which is the best country in the world?
thebrainpolice
07-30-2011, 02:41 PM
Kazakhstan is the greatest country in the world. All other countries are run by little girls.To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 15 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
Why are all other countries run by little girls?
Because its the American way or the highway.
Why do some people take their time when they aren't doing anything productive or enjoyable?
Negativezero
07-30-2011, 03:37 PM
Cause they're bodies function like a turn based rpg. They have to wait for the meter to fill up before they can make any legitimate actions.
Why does mommy beat daddy?
Sethis
07-30-2011, 03:51 PM
Because someone painted a target on daddy.
Where have all ninjas gone?
Negativezero
07-30-2011, 04:03 PM
To the sweet rave party at the end of the rainbow.
Who's hosting the rave?
Steve Jobs
If imac, what do u?
gracious
07-30-2011, 04:37 PM
If you mac, I'll bring you a bucket and show you the way out.
How do they get away with claiming that the economic downturn is over?
By smiling.
What is utopia like?
thebrainpolice
07-30-2011, 04:49 PM
Everything is pretty much the same, except everyone always has an orgasm.
Why can't I see Russia from my house?
Negativezero
07-30-2011, 04:49 PM
Cause they use a Klingon cloaking device.
Why aren't there anymore dinosaurs?
Darwin killed them.
Why didn't Darwin survive?
thebrainpolice
07-30-2011, 04:53 PM
Because the finches on the Galapagos Islands thought he knew too much.
Why don't Christian Conservatives like Darwin?
Maybe they conserve what they like to a minimum.
Where is the love in logic?
Negativezero
07-30-2011, 05:01 PM
Cause they Darwin won all the dance off's and was the life of the party.
edit-------------------
somewhere mixed in with if, then, and else.
Why is stem cell research so controversial?
gracious
07-30-2011, 05:06 PM
Because if we open the door to the stem cells then the stamen cells can't be far behind and that is a slippery slope.
Do kids today still learn pythogorean theorem?
No, they can't get past the squaring.
How did 8 turn sideways and become infinite?
gracious
07-30-2011, 05:13 PM
The Magic 8 ball did it.
If infinity minus 1 is still infinity then how much do you need to subtract before you get a result?
Bobsama
07-30-2011, 05:24 PM
You need to subtract Steve Jobs.
Who has an IQ higher than Steve Jobs?
ShadowCat
07-30-2011, 05:37 PM
I do at 124.
How many drinks does it take to come up with a question?
Negativezero
07-30-2011, 05:41 PM
2.4, only if you eat a small kitten with it.
who framed roger rabbit?
ShadowCat
07-30-2011, 05:45 PM
Davinchi of course.
How many of davinchi's paintings would it take to fill a museum?
Negativezero
07-30-2011, 05:51 PM
over 9000.
Why was Vegeta so angry about power level's over 9000?
ShadowCat
07-30-2011, 05:55 PM
Cause he couldn't surpass 9000 until Goku.
Why do they have fifteen minutes of monolauge in anime's amidst battling?
mainah
07-30-2011, 06:14 PM
That's how long it takes to go to the bathroom and make popcorn.
Why does a sheep have wool?
ShadowCat
07-30-2011, 06:26 PM
To knit a sweater for the winter.
Why do cats have claws?
mainah
07-30-2011, 06:28 PM
To polish furniture.
Why does the earth spin?
ShadowCat
07-30-2011, 06:35 PM
To keep us from falling.
Why do people nag?
Sprelious
07-30-2011, 07:25 PM
Their "S" is in hyperdrive.
Why is the sky blue?
Bobsama
07-30-2011, 09:01 PM
Because it isn't an anime.
Who's Tohya Miho?
Sprelious
07-30-2011, 10:49 PM
She works at the 7-11 down the street.
Who is the most beautiful woman in the world?
mainah
07-31-2011, 05:45 AM
Roseanne.
Why is the sun yellow?
To keep you mellow.
What is a cat's conscience like?
Bobsama
07-31-2011, 06:06 AM
Terrified.
Brooklyn or Queens?
Sprelious
07-31-2011, 08:01 AM
You can leave for a 2:00 appointment at 2:00 and be there at 2:00 according to my relatives.
Why are relatives so annoying?
Bobsama
07-31-2011, 08:23 AM
Because they appear on page 666.
Page 666 or Page 3?
gracious
07-31-2011, 10:11 AM
666 but I changed the order of the sixes; I'm sure you picked up on that.
Do I really have to visit my parents today?
thebrainpolice
07-31-2011, 11:30 AM
No. Everyone over forty is a senile old coot, so if you don't visit they won't remember.
Why do old people become senile?
GettingBetter
07-31-2011, 11:40 AM
Because they have advanced from from the junile stage and deserve the status.
Can you get a teenage boy to talk instead of grunt?
thebrainpolice
07-31-2011, 11:50 AM
No. I couldn't speak from age 13 until I was 20.
Why do so many chicks on this forum have dudes for avatars and vice versa?
By switching to the opposite sex they think they may gain a tactical edge in acquiring people of the opposite sex.
What does the quote "Confusion is sex" mean?
GettingBetter
07-31-2011, 12:02 PM
^^We are too embarrassed to get caught cross-dressing in public.
^ Nothing. If confusion were sex, I wouldn't have been out of the bedroom for 10 years.
How significant is it that so many forumites have dead people as their avatars?
Sprelious
07-31-2011, 12:42 PM
Dead people look better.
What is going to happen in 2012?
gracious
07-31-2011, 03:45 PM
Well, when I require clairvoyance I turn to Magic 8 Ball. You will be pleased to know "The reply is no".
P.S. also the story of my life.
How do those bladeless fans work?
Sprelious
07-31-2011, 03:47 PM
By sucking air in through a black hole from an entirely different planet.
Why no.
gracious
07-31-2011, 03:58 PM
OK - this is the last time I ask Magic 8 Ball tonight. It says "It is most likely".
Is luck on my side?
Sprelious
07-31-2011, 04:11 PM
I think so, does it look like a coffee stain?
How many pages are in the Bible?
thebrainpolice
07-31-2011, 04:25 PM
666.
Who wrote the Bible?
Bobsama
07-31-2011, 04:26 PM
Lucifer Sam.
Why did Lucy write the Bible?
thebrainpolice
07-31-2011, 04:43 PM
Lucy was tripping on some bad acid.
Where can I find acid?
Bobsama
07-31-2011, 04:47 PM
At CVS.
Who's Syd Barrett? ;)
thebrainpolice
07-31-2011, 04:55 PM
I'm pretty sure that he was some rapper.
Why do rappers use the n-word so much?
Bobsama
07-31-2011, 04:56 PM
Because "new" is synonymous with "fresh".
Do you speak a second language?
IronSulfide
07-31-2011, 06:58 PM
Yes, but it consists entirely of 0s and 1s.
Why do people paint their fingernails?
venuspop
08-01-2011, 02:20 AM
Because leftover paints should never be wasted.
Will anyone paint their house purple?
The Frozen One
08-01-2011, 02:36 AM
So Barney feels more comfortable when he moves in to the neighborhood.
What is the 1,000 pound gorilla in the room?
venuspop
08-01-2011, 02:38 AM
My friend's Dad.
What's the gorilla doing in the room?
thebrainpolice
08-01-2011, 04:04 AM
Smoking a pipe and reading the New York Times.
When will the newspaper industry collapse?
The Frozen One
08-01-2011, 04:21 AM
When people start reading the news nore than watching it.
Why do we treat elections like they are sporting events?
UnrulyR3d
08-01-2011, 06:35 AM
To figure out who the true American supporters are.
Why are Monday mornings always the worst?
Most people go back to a mode of slavery, which may have aspects counter to their morals and free will, but may seem necessary to survival.
Why can't you have your cake and eat it, if you are eating it, don't you by implication have it?
gracious
08-01-2011, 12:46 PM
Because it's a urinal cake and presumably you wouldn't want to eat it too.
Why do men tolerate the lack of privacy of urinals?
thebrainpolice
08-01-2011, 02:42 PM
Because whipping your junk out in front of other men is a form of male bonding.
Why do women pee sitting down?
They have less to aim with, therefore need a wider range for a target.
Why do people gossip at work?
Sprelious
08-01-2011, 03:40 PM
It's a ploy to get out of doing what they are actually supposed to be doing.
Why am I soooooooooo addicted to these game threads?
thebrainpolice
08-01-2011, 04:03 PM
They are coated with cocaine.
Why do people like cocaine so much?
Sprelious
08-01-2011, 04:16 PM
It comes from the cocoa plant and evryone loves chocolate.
Why did they remove cocaine from Coke?
gracious
08-01-2011, 05:02 PM
The seedy advertising executives cost slightly less than the Colombian drug lords.
How many varieties of Coke are there now?
Sprelious
08-01-2011, 05:09 PM
One, but there are thousands of different labels
How many days until the superbowl?
ness2361
08-01-2011, 05:17 PM
2
What color are your eyes?
Sprelious
08-01-2011, 05:20 PM
There not really eyes. There leftover mood rings and the color depends on my mood
What are three things you absolutely have to do in the event of a meteor strike?
ness2361
08-01-2011, 05:23 PM
1) Take off all my clothes
2) Go outside and stand out in the open
3) Take nothing of value, like tin foil, with me.
If you could be any animal other than human, which would you choose?
GettingBetter
08-01-2011, 05:25 PM
^you little snake.
Call an impromptu party, eat chocolate, and drink good red wine.
I would be a panther that could fly.
Why are there meteors in the world?
thebrainpolice
08-01-2011, 05:34 PM
They came here to make out with the terrestrial rocks.
Why do things fall down, but not up?
ness2361
08-01-2011, 05:36 PM
They've passed out after two many triple-secs.
Where is Noah's Ark?
gracious
08-01-2011, 05:39 PM
At Noah's yacht club.
Why do you suppose Noah saved the mosquitos from the flood?
ness2361
08-01-2011, 05:50 PM
^ to kill off those whom the Masterminds disliked--with encephalitis.
Who invented paper?
thebrainpolice
08-01-2011, 06:13 PM
Abraham Gore. Al Gore's great great great great great great great great great great great great granddad.
Who invented Al Gore?
Sprelious
08-01-2011, 06:19 PM
SNL
Who invented Mr. Potatoe Head (Dan Quail)?
ness2361
08-01-2011, 09:32 PM
^Who invented Mr. Potato Head? (An Irishman.)
Why do nuthatches traverse trees upside down?
venuspop
08-02-2011, 01:54 AM
Chicks go wild when they do. ;)
Why do woodpeckers peck wood?
thebrainpolice
08-02-2011, 04:09 AM
Its a myth that they peck wood. Really they are just huge heavy metal fans and they are constantly head banging.
When will Metallica release a new album, and what will it be called?
ShadowCat
08-02-2011, 06:02 AM
Metallica its self is an imaginary band that was created by corporate halfwits to scam money from metalheads.
When will the rich be overthrown?
Negativezero
08-02-2011, 08:00 AM
Inevitably in the future it's going to happen, just be patient.
How will the rich be overthrown?
themuzicman
08-02-2011, 08:05 AM
With bad math.
What's greater than negative zero?
gracious
08-02-2011, 09:25 AM
Introducing INTJf's newest member: "What". Heck of a guy, that What. Everybody's talking about him.
I'm thinking of getting a phobia. Any recommendations?
Sprelious
08-02-2011, 09:36 AM
Agorophobia. That way you can stay home and post things that make me laugh all day long.
What's the square root of bad math?
gracious
08-02-2011, 09:47 AM
Pi of course. or infinity. It's always one of those.
Why did I stop doing math in my head?
thebrainpolice
08-02-2011, 10:03 AM
Because it is cheaper to outsource the work to India.
Why do armpits smell bad?
Negativezero
08-02-2011, 11:01 AM
Cause you were cursed by Majora
Why'd a girl come in my house topless randomly last night?
Certain
08-02-2011, 11:25 AM
Alzheimer's!
Why does Superman wear a cape?
Bobsama
08-02-2011, 11:35 AM
To carry his kryptonite.
Where in the world is Carmen Sandiego?
Sprelious
08-02-2011, 02:15 PM
She married waldo and they had a bunch of kids who all kinda blend in.
Where have all the flowers gone?
Cepheid
08-02-2011, 03:14 PM
I picked them all to give to you in a bouquet, but they all went missing around valentines day...
Why are science jokes so hit and miss.
Sprelious
08-02-2011, 03:32 PM
Trial and error is a long standing scientific principle
Are the fruit flies actually in the fruit?
ness2361
08-02-2011, 04:17 PM
No, the fruit is in the vegetables.
Where did I put my reading glasses?
Sprelious
08-02-2011, 04:37 PM
They're on top of your head.....again
Where's the best place to get Thai?
thebrainpolice
08-02-2011, 05:35 PM
The internet. They have everything there.
Is there anything that hasn't been made into porn?
Abstinence.
What is vertigo?
ness2361
08-02-2011, 05:42 PM
^^ My father.
How will I get the gum out of my cat, Gizmo's fur without hurting him?
^ an astrological sign.
Sprelious
08-02-2011, 06:12 PM
Shave him.
Is it wrong to proud of my .....
thebrainpolice
08-02-2011, 06:34 PM
Man boobs? That's a weird thing to be proud of but why not.
Why does eating too much make you fat? Won't you just poop all of that extra food out?
Sprelious
08-02-2011, 06:39 PM
Eating too much will make someone else fat and someone has been eating like a pig.
Is 100% body fat really a bad thing?
ness2361
08-02-2011, 10:42 PM
Eating too much will make someone else fat and someone has been eating like a pig.
Is 100% body fat really a bad thing?
Because 100% lean body fat will envy you.
What is H20 made of?
venuspop
08-02-2011, 10:55 PM
One horse with two orifices.
Why does meat make a person angry?
ness2361
08-03-2011, 02:39 AM
Just for the fun of it.
Are two-heads really better than one...?
venuspop
08-03-2011, 03:45 AM
No. Three heads tops them all.
Why are the two sides of a coin called heads and tails?
thebrainpolice
08-03-2011, 04:15 AM
Because calling the back of the coin the ass offended the Christian Right.
Is there life on other planets?
Sprelious
08-03-2011, 08:09 AM
[QUOTE=thebrainpolice;1903224]No. Fat floats in water, so if you become morbidly obese you will never drown.
No. There 's used to be, but they argued polotics all the time while poluting the enviroment and.......
Does every cloud have a silver lining?
ShadowCat
08-03-2011, 10:45 AM
If you imagine it does, but I doubt it will help you from falling without a parachute.
If a skull had wings? What would it be called?
Sprelious
08-03-2011, 01:01 PM
That would be a great archeological find. That's the skull of Mercury.
What was that movie with John Cusak and Kate Beckinsale?
thebrainpolice
08-03-2011, 03:41 PM
Haha nice try To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 15 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. But since this is the wrong answer game I'm going to have to say transmogrify.
What's the best place to get cheap beer?
Sprelious
08-03-2011, 03:42 PM
My refrigerator
What's the best meat to eat on Friday?
gracious
08-03-2011, 05:43 PM
Seagull.
Does anyone use graph paper anymore?
venuspop
08-03-2011, 07:15 PM
Yes. Islanders in third world countries used them to wrap home-grown tobacco.
What did the big chimney say to the small chimney?
ness2361
08-03-2011, 08:37 PM
You're too old to smoke.
What is yeast made of?
venuspop
08-03-2011, 09:00 PM
Why, that's easy! Five letters, i.e. y - e - a - s and t.
Are orgies a Roman invention?
ness2361
08-03-2011, 11:35 PM
No, God had sex with Adam then Eve which made Eve jealous and that is why she ate the damning piece of fruit.
Where did I put your toe nail clippers?
Cepheid
08-04-2011, 04:40 AM
I never lent you my toe nail clippers, that was my laser cheese knife.
Why do flies constantly have to touch EVERYTHING!
thebrainpolice
08-04-2011, 05:33 AM
They have OCD.
How many roads must a man walk down before you can call him a man?
crystalscar
08-04-2011, 05:41 AM
All men are human but not all human are men.
Why isn't my phone responding?
venuspop
08-04-2011, 05:42 AM
You ought to insert the batteries.
What are you looking at?
thebrainpolice
08-04-2011, 05:45 AM
It's in a coma.
Why do soccer fans riot so much?
Snaked!
Well I am on the internet so I'll let you fill in the blank. Now my question.
venuspop
08-04-2011, 05:47 AM
To proof that they know something about soccer.
Why is David Beckham married to Victoria?
crystalscar
08-04-2011, 05:54 AM
Some soccer fans scream and does a lot of silly things when their team scored a goal.
Won't people get bored from listening to the same song for more than 20 times?
venuspop
08-04-2011, 06:14 AM
Wait till they insist you listen to them sing the same song for more than twenty times.
Is the earth's interior hollow?
thebrainpolice
08-04-2011, 06:17 AM
Yes. That's where all the fairies, leprechauns, elves, and unicorns hide.
Why am I the only one who can see the fairies in my yard?
venuspop
08-04-2011, 06:19 AM
Boy, when you're acting funny, you see funny stuffs. ;)
Do you worship Nixon?
thebrainpolice
08-04-2011, 06:26 AM
Yes. He was impeached to redeem humanity for it's sins.
What President would you start a cult around?
venuspop
08-04-2011, 06:27 AM
;D The Peanut Cult. I love peanuts.
Which President did you love to hate?
thebrainpolice
08-04-2011, 06:33 AM
Grover Cleveland. That guy sucked.
Where's Waldo?
IronSulfide
08-04-2011, 09:58 AM
In Wallonia.
What really happened to Jimmy Hoffa?
gracious
08-04-2011, 10:21 AM
DB Cooper fell on him in that forest.
Why did LPs go out of style?
thebrainpolice
08-04-2011, 10:46 AM
Because 8 tracks are the wave of the future.
What is the maximum air speed velocity of a swallow?
gracious
08-04-2011, 12:45 PM
:freak: Brain ... exploding.... with .... swallow... innuendos. Can't ... focus on ...just one. :freak:
Good or bad?
IronSulfide
08-04-2011, 01:43 PM
Gad.
What is your favorite Pokemon?
gracious
08-04-2011, 01:47 PM
Optimus Prime.
How many of them are there?
IronSulfide
08-04-2011, 02:00 PM
Six-hundred and sixty-six, including Mephistochu.
Does Tarot have any predictive power?
Cepheid
08-04-2011, 02:12 PM
It depends on how good you are at counting how many jelly beans are in the jar.
Is there anything worse than slow internet?
ness2361
08-04-2011, 04:56 PM
Access to the Internet at all.
Will pigeons outnumber sparrows in the next 10 years; if so, why?
gracious
08-04-2011, 05:04 PM
No. Both populations will be choked out by a plague of locusts who the elderly have unwittingly been feeding crusts of bread in local parks.
Why are locusts such a successful insect?
ness2361
08-04-2011, 05:17 PM
Because they have an incredible center of gravity.
When will it be dinner time in Taiwan?
IronSulfide
08-04-2011, 05:27 PM
When China says so.
What is a spork?
gracious
08-04-2011, 05:32 PM
It's one of those g-mod foods. This one is made from salmon fins spliced with pig snout. Hottest new trend amongst foodies.
What do you think of this eating raw food trend?
IronSulfide
08-04-2011, 05:35 PM
It's awfully cruel to the cows. Put them out of their misery first.
What is organic food?
gracious
08-04-2011, 05:40 PM
Food made out of vital organs like kidney, liver and heart.
Is it worth the extra cost?
thebrainpolice
08-04-2011, 06:01 PM
Not if they are made from your vital organs.
What is a Spleen used for?
gracious
08-04-2011, 06:06 PM
Stir fried with lemongrass, chili peppers and onions to make Szechuan Spleen.
Why do I function the same without a gall bladder?
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