I'm So Bored; Please Amuse Me - The Wrong Answer Game

[le Duc]

Except for Zorro!

Perhaps the modern Zorro drives a Mazda?

[rwyatt365]

Yeah, he did but got embarassed after being told that it was a "chick car"?

What exactly IS a "chick car"?

[Ian]

A very stylish, French vehicle that was used to name an American city- as in 'Look at that chic car go' (Sorry)

Given that the speed of light is finite, and the size of the universe is infinite, do you want some toast?

[rwyatt365]

Yes, but only at the edge of the universe.

How hot is a disco inferno?

[Synamon]

Ice, ice, baby. I'd post the song but I just can't. Muppets doing Rick Astley scarred me enough for the whole year.

How hot is hot?

[bladeserver]

My usual point of reference is me and I, apparently, am smoking.

How green is my valley?

[Synamon]

Your valley is verdant Sprout. Say hi to the Jolly Green guy for me.


Can I call you Sprout as a nickname?

[bladeserver]

I would prefer Bruno but I guess sprout is better than "hey you".

Why is my neck stiff?

[le Duc]

Syn: You'd be the first.
Blade: From sitting there poised and ready to post a reply.;)

How's Uncle Walter?





So what's wrong with Uncle Walter, already? You can break the news to me now... I'm ready.

[bladeserver]

Glad you are fine. I ran over him with the steamroller while we were laying the new patio stones. Its O.K. the roller is fine and I got the full deposit back.

How do I manage to stay alive?

[Fridays Child]

Milk stout and pork scratchings.

Can I watch you next time?

[ssrprotege]

Yes, but remember that you will be assimilated should I see you again. Welcome to the ISTJ collective!

Why would FC watch me?

[NephilimAzrael]

To see what minds you eat
I'm so tired of cheese, why is that?

[Fridays Child]

Because you need someone to show you the whey.

Would I still be me if I melted?

[Wapiti]

Yes, just look at your avatar, thats you only melted.

Where do babies come from?

[NHere]

Not where you came from.


Your mom hasn't explained that to you yet?

[Lupin]

No, she was never there.....'emotionally absent and neglectful mothers' should constitute criminal activity.

It is the day of stiff necks....why does my neck feel like someone else's who's just had a touch of whiplash?

[NHere]

The people who kidnap INTJs in their sleep to do experiments on our brain mixed up your neck with Blade's when he fought off the anesthesia unexpectedly ...don't worry, they'll be swapped back in the coming days.

Where, oh, where, has my motivation gone?

[Ian]

Dunno, look behind the fridge or down the side of the settee cushions.

If a tree falls over in the forest when there is no one around...... would you like a toasted tea-cake?

[NephilimAzrael]

Square root of 2486

Mmm. cake. What is my dream?

[Lupin]

To be the reincarnation of the one and only Mr Kipling, the Lennon of baking.

"You are the cake man, you are the cake man, you are the Walrus, doo do'n do".

*huh?*

Six fingers on each hand hasn't done my neck any good whatsoever. Serves me right for believing in the discounted and speedy offers of health tourism.....

*Lupin looks out of her dirty window onto a Bombay ghetto and is thankful for her liking of Garam Masala*.

Are we going too far?

[ssrprotege]

Whoa, you are in a Delta Quadrant. That was quite a thought! If you want to go farther, go for it, I like being in the realm of thought I have never been before! Whether it's crazy or not doesn't matter to me, everything "weird" is "normal" here! *feeling adrenalin pumping through my body*

Why am I so hyperactive now? Libido is going out, but I feel energized! This is very un-introverted!

[le Duc]

You feel energized because you changed to an I. If you went back to E, you'd feel lethargic. If you changed to a P, you'd feel decisive. Anyway...

Why doesn't anyone ever mention the blueberries of wrath?

[ssrprotege]

Because INTJ's don't want to have the Bendii Syndrome.

How are the blueberries connected to wrath? Explain to me, step-by-step.

[le Duc]

Blueberries are false berries, while grapes are true berries, even though blueberries have 'berry' in their name. That oughtta stir up the wrath in anyone.

Is life a chair of bowlies?

[bladeserver]

No. It is Tall, everlasting and really quite pleasant. Rather like a tall bowl of custard.


Cut me a break?

[le Duc]

Somebody cut my brakelines once. It was really bad.

Why would you want that, anyway?

[Lupin]

Jolly good question......

Let's just pose that one again, precisely why would I want that?

[Synamon]

Because he wants to live forever and do it fast.

edit: and you too Lupin since it is the same question

Why are they called brakes if you only get broken when they fail?

[Lupin]

A (b)rake's progress was indeed a failure for one particular individual.

.....what are you trying to do, send us all to Bedlam?

[le Duc]

Jolly good question......

Let's just pose that one again, precisely why would I want that?

That is patently unfair.;) No way you get points for being faster with that one!

A (b)rake's progress was indeed a failure for one particular individual.

.....what are you trying to do, send us all to Bedlam?

No, she just wants us to land in the ferns. (I wonder if anyone will get that one...)

If cheaters never win, and winners never quit, what do quitters never do?

[Fridays Child]

Become citizens of Finnland.

And who would blame them?

[le Duc]

I wouldn't, 'cause that's what I never do.

We haven't done food on here in awhile (3 hours, in fact), so what's for lunch?

[Fridays Child]

Minced offal.

Want some?

[le Duc]

I wonder if offal has an homonymous etymology.

Where does nothing come from?

[Fridays Child]

Nothing comes from nothing, nothing ever could... so somewhere in my youth (or childhood), I must have done something good.

Why can't we all sing like Julie Andrews?

[le Duc]

Alas, the sad situation. We could all lose our voice like her.

If you could sing beautifully once and never again, would you?

[Fridays Child]

No. The Long Blondes beat me to it with their version of Once and Never Again, so there's no point.

Would you like that as a ringtone for your mobile?

[le Duc]

Tomorrow Starts Today would be a better ringtone for Mobile.

If you can't sing, what else is there?

[Fridays Child]

Well, I can't sing Beautifully... For Stars cornered that one, too.

Is my life a total loss?

[le Duc]

Not total. We can salvage something, I'm sure.

Could anyone's life be a total gain?

[Lupin]

Hopefully we can all wrestle successfully with it but, like most females, we can joyfully embrace weight gain without a doubt. I mean, it's not exactly like backing a doped-up, grey, three-legged horse. You really do have a chance of winning this one ;).

Can anyone see the merit of 'magic pants'?

[le Duc]

So long as they're not the Wrong Trousers.

Do you have a grommet in your desk?

[Wapiti]

No but I do have fake vomit and I will now sing a sonnet while wearing a bonnet and magic pants.

Why are they called "hard boiled" eggs. They're not really hard, they're just firm.

[le Duc]

Eat a sof boiled and you'll see why they're called har boiled.

But are they har, har, har?

[Wapiti]

No, they are hard, I just edited it.

Are magic pants sof sof sof?

[Lupin]

Depends how you boil them.....magma can have quite a solidifying effect me thinks. Doubt Pompeii's eggs were just 'firm'. Luckily they were edified before the salmonella took hold.

Will Olympiads come back with chronic asthma?

You lot are so quick off the draw 2nite, I thought I'd leave my initial response in just for larffffs.

[Fridays Child]

Sorry... I was busy backing a doped-up, grey, three-legged pantomime horse.

Aren't the Olympics just a myth?

[le Duc]

No, I've been there. They're real, honest-to-goodness mountains. Very impressive, too.

Which leg, upon removal, leaves the horse with the best balance?

[Lupin]

The best balance comes when you keep paying into the same bank and er, keeping it there. What you're talking about horses for is anybody's guess.

Fancy a walk?

[le Duc]

The fancy Q walk is better, but if you're thinking about taking it up, you really need to talk to the Ministry of Scilly Walks first.

Was Napoleon complex?

[Fridays Child]

Not as complex as a Milles Feuilles. Now there's a pastry!

Why did you make me start talking about food...again??

[le Duc]

That's right: blame me. Everybody knows that when you bring up French dictators *pop* the first thing into FC's mind is namesake pastries...

Are the first nine clouds really numbered somewhere?

[Fridays Child]

Yes, but you can only see the numbers from up here. It's so I don't confuse them with sheep.

Did you see the one that looked like a gingersnap?

[le Duc]

My window faces north. I think that one is east.

Did you see the one that looks like a pair of cupid wings?

[Fridays Child]

No, no... those were Cupid's wings.

Didn't you see the label?

[le Duc]

I'm not up there. I'm down here.

How'd you get up there?

[Fridays Child]

Sheer merit, my friend. That, and the incredible lightness of being. Oh. And a hot air balloon.

Pass the champagne?

[Wapiti]

For 'twas the night before Christmas and it is customary for Santa to drink champagne on his last stop and Pass out.

Was Napolean really Dynamite?

[le Duc]

FC: I did. I wonder if you did, though, 'cause it's not up there. I passed it sitting on the sidewalk at 5th & Broadway.

Rapidi: No, that was Nobel. (Who would want a Napoleon Peace Prize, anyway...)

Do French cows have French horns?

[Fridays Child]

Yes, and they go "les toutes, les toutes" all day long until you just have to turn them into luxury leather goods and boeuf bourguignon.

I mean, wouldn't you?

[Wapiti]

Yep, I toot all the time.

Is this where all the thread eating vultures hang out?

[le Duc]

FC: Scrumptious. That is one dish I have a goal of eating before I leave this planet.

Rocketship: No, this is where fast people with no life chill.;)

Where is the road more traveled?

[Wapiti]

Where it is paved and not graveled.

Where do lillies grow and wapiti run and the wind only gently blows?

[Fridays Child]

Check your outhouse.

Do you mind if I don't?

[le Duc]

I nevermind.

Doth not since we ergo hoc?

[Fridays Child]

I added a hoc once. Big big mistake.

Can we take this up a notch?

[le Duc]

What goes up must come down.

Are you allergic to down?

[Fridays Child]

Only when drowning.

Where are my water wings?

[Wapiti]

Frozen in time on the back of an angel. (To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 15 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.)
Can you fly a plane made of ice?

[Fridays Child]

Yes, I can. Just not especially well. And there's another bad time to be allergic to down.

Whatever happened to Baby Jane?

[bladeserver]

Last time I saw her, I swear, she was fine and getting on the 99a night bus to Plaistow.


Why do my bubbles NEARLY reach the sky?

[le Duc]

'Cuz their arms are too short.

Why did they let you have bubbles in the first place?

[Fridays Child]

Because someone else had first dibs on the ostrich feather costume.

Was that not a good choice?

[NHere]

Your tone suggests a lack of confidence in your choice. Perhaps you would have chosen to fight for your right to have ostrich feathers if you had more confidence.

Am I alone in the world?

[bladeserver]

Pretty much completely. We are an organized group of chatbots here for your pleasure and everything else in your life is an illusion.

What is important?

[Lupin]

Happiness is important. In fact, it's the ONLY important thing you need to make pains to discover and hold on to. I recommend a jolly good look at Grayling and Tolle for a bit of inspiration ;). Or, like me, just have another slice of Mr Kipling's Jamaica Ginger cake.

Questioning can delay a quicker route to enduring, enviable inner happiness, n'est pas?

[NHere]

Mais non, for it is in questioning that we realize that we are, in fact, NOT happy, and if we never knew we were not happy, we wouldn't ever have the reason to envy inner happiness.

Are you happy it's Friday?

[rwyatt365]

How can one EVER be happy that Friday is "it"?! That leaves six other days left in obscurity. The unfairness of that is crushing and debilitating. To think that one day take precedence over all of the others, when those others have so much to give!

Why is the world so cruel?

[NHere]

Yeesh. You don't have to take it personally.


What color is is the Dominican flag?

[bladeserver]

I suggest you ask Percy, Amazona imperialis, and he knows all.


What language should i use?

[ssrprotege]

SJ-ese.

Why doesn't bladeserver even know which language he speaks?

[NHere]

Usually the problem is what language does everybody ELSE speak...sans babblefish of course.

Who's in the lead?

[bladeserver]

Certainly not me.


What did the second bird get if the early bird got the worm?

[NHere]

Breakfast.

What time is bedtime?

[le Duc]

8pm on Channel 19.

If pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of conquest?

[NHere]

I protest! I get to choose the channel tonight.

Does this make me look fat?

[Synamon]

No. (well it is the wrong answer game)


Why do I lie?

[NHere]

Because it gets hard to stand after a while.

What is the proper protocol for raising a flag?

[Fridays Child]

Surrender.

Are you ready now?

[le Duc]

NH: A little more formal than raising hell.

FC: Yes. Ready, set, go! (except you already won...)

Wrong or left?

[NHere]

They're too sinister to tell apart.

How much rice can be eaten with a single chopstick?

[Fridays Child]

Quite a lot, the way I make it.

Why doesn't anyone ever eat rice at my house?

[NHere]

Must be due to the multitude of better options.

This program is brought to you by ____________________.

[Wapiti]

This program is brought to you by ____________________.

Brought to you by the fact that that is not a question.

Is it?

[Synamon]

No.


Ever notice that "no" can be used to answer all these questions. Do two year olds really know the answer to everything?

[NHere]

Wapiti: I always tried telling my teachers fill-in-the-blank wasn't a question, but was overruled every time.

Syn: Two-year-olds retain the ancient knowledge and all keys to the secrets of the universe.

What defines a "question"?

[Synamon]

The correct question is "Who defines a question?".

Can a wrong answer ever be right?



psssst: I'm not FC, no slug hair

[Wapiti]

If the next poster says so, then yes. Otherwise no.

Whats black and white and grey on the underside?

[rwyatt365]

Nothing, absolutely nothing.

But, why does Syn lie?

[Wapiti]

Because Syn = FC. They are one in the same.

Why are they the same?

[Fridays Child]

We aren't. At least, I'm not. She may be.

Why don't more people build temples in my honour?

[bladeserver]

They have. The little people who live at the bottom of my garden have built thirteen gold encrusted temples in your honor. We use them for ring toss.


Why is the world confusing or is it just me?

[le Duc]

I don't understand. Can you clarify?

[Fridays Child]

I can, but only with butter.

Ghee, anyone?

[bladeserver]

Whiz? Cheese whiz? I just love these complex word games.

Could somebody explain life to me pretty please?

[le Duc]

Whatever life is, it ain't always pretty.

Why not?

[rwyatt365]

Because life is addicted to Meth, and you know what that does to your looks.

Don't you?

[Fridays Child]

World shortage of lippy. Alert the media.

Did you check the rouge futures?

[le Duc]

The futures show it being in the red for awhile yet.

If what goes up must come down, what must what goes sideways do?

[Fridays Child]

It sends you out to buy a new belt.

Does that convey anything to you?

[rwyatt365]

Sideways is always relegated to mediocrity. It can't even be bad enough to get down.

Can down really get down, or is it just faking?

[le Duc]

You've obviously never seen a duck in a mosh pit.

Why doesn't anyone ever stop and ponder the obvious?

[Fridays Child]

I just did, at the top of the escalator... and boy, was that fun!

Did you ever wonder why people scream as they fall?

[le Duc]

I've always wanted to fall off a mountain or skyscraper just to see if I could do it without screaming. I haven't tried yet, though.

I wonder if you'd scream if gravity vanished and you fell up?

[Fridays Child]

I lost all gravity ages ago, and it's great. I highly recommend it.

Do you ever scream for ice cream?

[ssrprotege]

Yeah, screaming is the effective way to have ice cream. I SCREAM!!! SCREAM!!!!!!

Why would FC want ice cream, even when she lives in Antarctica?

[le Duc]

She doesn't want it then, she wants it the other nine months when she's living above the clouds.

But ice cream or custard?

[Fridays Child]

Easy! Frozen custard all round... my treat. :)

Does a hexagon make us more willing to stop than a circle?

[le Duc]

Octagons are used for stop signs in my part of the hemisphere.

But is it the color or the shape that does it?

[Fridays Child]

I'm thinking that a pink elephant shape might cause a few people to stop.

Should we propose it?

[bladeserver]

No. I think we shoudl devlop a sign wit multipl misspellings to make people spot and read it. (Maybe with jokes as well).

Was it my imagination or were there 2,157 countries in the Olympic parade last night?

[NHere]

2,158 - you missed Kiribati. It's small, so it's understandable.

How many cars must Beijing take off the road to counteract the carbon output of the Olympic torch?

[bladeserver]

Given lax emission standards I would say *1*.


Why I am avidly watching Angola vs France in a preliminary handball match?

[NHere]

Because you didn't bother to check that results are already in:

France wins, Sweden/Hungary are up next.

Which Nobel prize will go to the person who solves the problem of time zones?

[Synamon]

Peace. Time zones have started more wars than all the pink elephants combined.

Who will win the most medals at the Olympic Games?

[bladeserver]

My initial thought was a man but maybe a woman. This is a very hard question for a Satyrday morning.

How many Satyrs does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

[Fridays Child]

Only two, but they have to be very very tiny. Unless they're in an Olympic torch.

Why am I still seeing fireworks?

[NHere]

Must've been a good time last night.

What's more exciting than the Olympics?

[Fridays Child]

Practically anything. Watching soap congeal, for instance.

Is it possible to sleep for 2 weeks straight?

[NHere]

Comatose people have been known to sleep for longer. 2 weeks - 2 years - 2 decades - what's your choice Rip V. Winkle?

What kind of dreams could come of a 2 week nap?

[le Duc]

Dreams of food when you're done sleeping.

Speaking of, what's for breakfast?

[NHere]

Well, there's probably some of FC's (and yes, I mean FC this time) one-chopstick rice left...

Why am I not yet asleep?

[le Duc]

You are. This forum is a dream.

Will FC dedicate her 1,000th post to this thread?

[Lupin]

Possibly but possibly not.....qui sait vraiment a part de FC elle-meme?

Has daylight saving finally had its day?

[Synamon]

Yes, it has saved up enough and should retire.

What say you?

[le Duc]

I say don't spend all the daylight in one place.

Why six-pence and not sixteen-pence?

[Lupin]

Well, if six pence is 2.5p, then 16p must be 3 shillings, one penny......but who really knows these days?

Are guineas better value for money than hamsters?

[le Duc]

Guinea pigs are invaluable test resources. I was one myself once.

Who gets the award for worst question ever?

[bladeserver]

After thumbing through all 2388 questions which was a chore and a half (and made me miss the preliminary rounds of beach volleyball and the early badminton) I have no hesitation in nominating

Le Duc Who gets the award for worst question ever?


How many times will I be shown the Olympic opening ceremony before I become physically ill?

[le Duc]

The flu is coming through your area in November. That gives you opportunity to watch it many thousands of times over.

Buy blue, but at what price?

[bladeserver]

$70.

But would you buy KO ?

[Fridays Child]

Technically, yes.

Would I be out for long, or short?

[NHere]

That would about be the long and short of it.

Isn't anyone getting as sick of men's beach volley ball as I am? Where is everyone when I'm bored to tears?

[faedra]

Playing beach volleyball.

How about sea volleyball?

[NHere]

Only for dolphins... :(

Do dolphins have doping scandals?

[Synamon]

Yes, they've been banned permanently from the diving competition. You never see them at the Olympics for just that reason.


What sport should they add next to the Olympics?

[bladeserver]

My thought is bowling. Who can resist the sight of all those uber manly bowlers strutting their stuff.

I am now watching womens badminton. WHY???

[Synamon]

Because you like watching people smack a birdie around. Sick, sick game. I'm more a fan of the ones where people hit balls myself.

Why isn't there beach badminton?

[bladeserver]

There is. Around here we play it with Piping plovers.


Which country could i represent and in what sport?

[le Duc]

I'm not sure Bolshevik stir-frying is even a sport.

If I didn't ask a question, would it kill the tread?

[Synamon]

It would result in your death by stoning. The thread would be just fine, thanks for asking.


What is Blade stir-frying?

[le Duc]

Stones. Stone stir-fry is even better than stone soup.

How could a virtual identity be stoned?

[Synamon]

By smoking virtual pot.


Did you inhale?

[le Duc]

Once. I'm still working on exhaling so I can take a second breath.

Has anyone ever tried beech volleyball?

[curiousjane]

No, but I tried chestnut golf once. ;)

If you were a sports ball, would you rather be bunted, slam-dunked, tossed, or head-butted?

[le Duc]

I'd like to be round.

If you were a question, would you want to be asked?

[bladeserver]

Yes but I would be really afraid of the answer.

How can I levitate and oscillate?

[le Duc]

I've been sitting here watching and can't figure it for the life of me.

Why keep us guessing?

[NHere]

No magician reveals his secrets...just lords it over the less worthy.

Who's going to be annoyed at my eating breakfast at work?

[PHS Philip]

The Martians. Eating at work is sacrilege on Mars.

What is the best way to eat a waffle?

[Synamon]

Quickly, without waffling, never show weakness. Pass the syrup.

What kind of berries would you like with your waffle?

grrrrrrr food in this thread again

[bladeserver]

I never, ever bury my waffles. It's bad luck.

Who is the big cheese?

[curiousjane]

A 1681 Gouda from Switzerland. It stinks, but it's worth it.

Why does my computer battery die so quickly?

[Fridays Child]

It's working up to pulling a sickie for tomorrow. Don't pander to it!

Are Mondays even legal?

[NephilimAzrael]

Not in Germany.

Why is it raining?

[curiousjane]

You were dancing a minute ago.

What was Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure?

[NephilimAzrael]

A trip to 50 cent's candy shop.

Where is Guatemala's chicken stock being held?

[Synamon]

It is in your pantry right behind the French Onion soup.

Who invented breathmints?

[xeeeej]

13th century Dragon tamers.

Why is the earth round?

[NephilimAzrael]

Because god likes balls.

Why is water wet?

[Synamon]

The two hydrogen molecules are huggling the oxygen one and it is crying.

Is oxygen inconsolable?

[NHere]

Inconsolable, no, irreconcilable , yes.

(and when you figure that answer out...get back to me and explain it, please)

Can somebody please explain the concept of "Monday" to me?

[Synamon]

It was a typo, should have been Oneday, someone really messed up. (bear with me, it all will be cleared up by my question)

Ok so if the first day of the week is Oneday and the second one is Twosday, shouldn't the next one be Threesday (or the typo Thursday), where did Wednesday come from?

[ssrprotege]

Wednesday came from the words "When's day": that is, on Wednesday, you keep wondering when you were supposed to do something, etc. Time gets screwed up on Wednesdays because God occasionally loves chaos.

What about Thursday, then?

[Lupin]

Out on Thursday, sorry.

Just how long does the right opportunity last?

[NephilimAzrael]

Actually a very PC version of Thrush day, which means "have a wash" day.

When the universe collapses, who will make the insurance claim?

[Seppuku Savant]

Oompa loompas of course. The Chocolate Factory is really a secret institution waiting for their time to collect after the destruction of the world.

Can gummy bears grow mold?

[le Duc]

If they have the appropriate tools and a green house.

Can care bears grow cold?



(PS: Hey Azreal! If somebody else beats you, your post must be amended accordingly. Thanks.)

[Lupin]

Care bears grow (c)old just like any other bears. But Winnie the Pooh remains immortal ;).

What made E ore?

[le Duc]

A... A... Mi(l)ner!

What would Kanga rue?



ADDENDUM: the right opportunity knocks until somebody answers it.

(Negative synergy caused by overlooked questions could cause massive collapse of the largest thread in history. Ramifications would be enormous. All this is now averted. You're welcome.)

[NHere]

Le Duc 1: Fuzzy Wuzzy was a care bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had no bear hair. Fuzzy Wuzzy wasn't fuzzy, was he? No, he was was a bare bear who grow'd so old that his brain had slow'd and he didn't know'd that he'd grow'd cold. Care bears only grow cold when they grow old and bare, there.

Le Duc 2: A meadow.

Are unicorns real?


Thank you, le Duc, that was bothering me.

[le Duc]

Multicorns wiped them out.

If corn joined the army, could it become a colonel?

[bladeserver]

Generally no because that would be a major violation of recruitment rules and would usually result in corporal punishment. Privately I think it would be just fine :).

How frank are the French?

[Lupin]

Zay harrrre priitty franche, les Froggies. But ze Rosbifs, zay harrre pritty franche too!

Are we really ready for Gori stories?

[le Duc]

As long as you can read them without rushin'.

What would we do without a sense of humor?

[Lupin]

We'd probably still have a 'humour' but nobody would know what it was for rather like the appendix. That's why we have a 'sense' of humour. Could even be the seventh sense (the sixth having already been purloined by our mystic friends and er Spock). Whether it could be surgically removed, scraped or lasered off, however, remains a debate to be written up by The Lancet.

Debt or Prophet?

[le Duc]

I would love to be able to predict my financial future.

Write or laughed?

[rwyatt365]

Wright is right. (I thought everyone knew that)

Schooner or later?

[Lupin]

Schooner of beer please, a bit later.

Selfish or sell fish?

[le Duc]

I love shellfish.

My op-ed or myopic?

[Lupin]

Personally, I'm pro-op-ed but would probably need my vari-focals to read it.

"Samson, is that you?", Delilah.

[Wapiti]

Son of Sam, yes it is I.

Do all serial killers fantasize of care bears that taste like myopic shell fish?

[Lupin]

I wager under 0.0000000001% have a penchant for such things so I doubt it will be anything more than a delicacy.......ever. Let's put it this way, you'll not be seeing that in the freezer cabinets at Iceland :).

Neither a lender nor borrower be?

[bladeserver]

I'll buzz in on that one.

The bishop asked me to see his see. Should I?

[Lupin]

I'd think about it carefully first. Would you just be seeing his see or would you actually be invited to sit on his see? I'd settle that one first and then take a pew. Whatever happens I suggest you don't kneel....he may just ask you where you got your hold ups ;).

Oi Bish, how did you develop that questionable habit?

[le Duc]

From much lighter material than the non-controversial habits.

Where four?

[Fridays Child]

In the bin, surrounding the "L", so I can make some bread tomorrow.

Should I add oatmeal?

[le Duc]

The oatmeal is already there. You need to add leavening.

Why is it always food?

[Fridays Child]

Syn made me do it. "No more food," I begged. But would she listen? Would she heck as like...

Are there six other deadly Syns out there?

[le Duc]

Only on Fridays.

Why am I up so late tonight?

[ssrprotege]

You were busy watching the Jerry Springer late night show. Of course, you forgot the fact that you watched it.

I just forgot what question I planned to write. Well, why do I forget?

[Lupin]

Because your forgettory works quicker than the rest of your brain.

Is your sub-conscious duping your conscious or are you just unconscious?

[ssrprotege]

Let's say even though I was knocked unconscious by the unconscious I am able to work and type.

What's a word that describes my state? Make-up words are okay.

[Lupin]

Massachusetts.....that sounds like a made-up word.

Snakes and ladders anyone?

[ssrprotege]

Massachusetts.....that sounds like a made-up word.

That's the right answer! (Ah, irony was not lost :rolleyes:)
I demand a different one!

Snakes and ladders anyone?

No, not for me, send them to California; I am pretty sure these items can execute prisoners much more effectively and painlessly than electrocutors.

ISTJ or ESTJ?

[Lupin]

Given the choice, ESTJ. Why, because I reckon they'd be more successful in business and the way the economy's going we all need to tighten our belts.

If you demand a different one, precisely how different would it be?

[NephilimAzrael]

ISTJ or ESTJ?

No thanks, I'm a carnivore.

Anyone got the question to 42?





AZRAELtheGHOST added to this post, 1 minutes and 6 seconds later...

Given the choice, ESTJ. Why, because I reckon they'd be more successful in business and the way the economy's going we all need to tighten our belts.

If you demand a different one, precisely how different would it be?

About 4 degrees

Whats the square of a maths block of cheese?

[ssrprotege]

normal cheese = what you eat
squared cheese = what you do when you take the photo ("Cheeeeeeeessssse!")

Why do I feel like an xSTP? I feel like doing some dangerous xtreme sports, as expressed in here (To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 15 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.).

[le Duc]

It's the x that's the most troublesome. Whenever you feel x, you need to be careful.

But are isports or esports that much fun?

[bladeserver]

My personal preference is Isports but I am, of course, biased. I once tried out for the English "Hiding in a dark cupboard team" but nver made it to the ilympics.

Why does the sun always rise in the west?

[le Duc]

Only when you're in the Southern Hemisphere.

Thorn, shout, seat, stew... why is each direction an anagram?

[NHere]

Because if they were palindromes we'd all get lost.

How many calories can you burn/minute typing 100 wpm vs. 40 wpm?

[Synamon]

3 gHz of extra energy is released by the friction of your fingertips on the keys.

Why does sleeping give me a crick in my neck?

[Wapiti]

Because your coffin is a little too short.

Why is there blood dripping from your fangs?

[Synamon]

Go look in a mirror, see those two bite marks on your neck? That's why. Welcome to the undead.

Is the "Did you ever feel like you killed a thread" thread a vampire since it just won't die?

[le Duc]

Perhaps its not a living organism at all. Makes it hard to kill.

What is life?

[Wapiti]

Life is the next street after Death, take a left and you're there.

What is Love?

[Fridays Child]

I dunno... but never ask an INTJ that in a thread ever again! Trust me...

Are you in the pink today?

[le Duc]

In the red. Deep in debt but not too pale.

If you became too pail, would you kick the bucket?

[Fridays Child]

Only if the bucket were full of dye.

Is happiness a warm puppy?

[bethlehem]

only if the puppy has peed on itself.
what should i do to become a fairy?

[Synamon]

Yum, with mushroom sauce.

Why can't I make eye contact with my dog after typing that in?

edit: To become a fairy you must first dip yourself in glitter, then learn to flit.

[le Duc]

Your dog can read.

Wait, your dog can read?

[Synamon]

Only minds.

Do you have one?

[le Duc]

My mother said I didn't mind.

Should a quack learn to duck?

[Lupin]

I have two actually and very proud.

Your dog has no nose, how does it smell?

.......whoops.....

Duck, they're seagulls.

Your dog still has no nose, how does it smell?

[le Duc]

Nobody cooked it fast enough. It just sat there. ETo view links or images in this forum your post count must be 15 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

Should we move on?

[Fridays Child]

Yes, to the first order of business.

Why don't we have a local pub?

[le Duc]

Noon.

What time zone are you in?

[Fridays Child]

Well, I think it's A.D. but I'm flexible.

Should I possess my soul in patience?

[le Duc]

Great, now we have to debate whether souls exist.

At least, can we all agree on the existence of patients?

[Synamon]

Agree? Ha ha ha, that is funny.

Can we agree to disagree?

[NHere]

No, they all left. Got tired of waiting for the doctor to show.

What's the most appropriate drink to serve to INTJs?

[le Duc]

NH: JIN with a little T, perhaps...

Syn: I refuse.

Can we disagree to agree?

[Synamon]

Certainly, I can be as disagreeable as you like.

Can I have my JIN with a twist?

[NHere]

Well, my internet connection has decided against all forms of reconciliation, disagreeable or otherwise. :(

So, can you carry on without me?

[Fridays Child]

(Syn) As long as I can have my jinn in a bottle.

(N H) Clearly, we have no trouble carrying on. In fact, my teachers always commented at length about my ability to carry on. So, fear not.

Will there be little umbrellas and bits of pineapple?

[bladeserver]

Yes and little people sheltering under the umbrellas.

Why do I have the same lunch every day?

[le Duc]

We'll never know your fetishes for strange food. But I'm surprised you're not tired of re-chewing it by now.

Have you ever seen an apple pine?

[Fridays Child]

I did, once. I was curiously moved. Especially after I ate it.

Are oranges happier when cut in wedges?

[IgnoranceIsKind]

No, I actually think wedges are better off cut in oranges. Global warming can only be stopped this way.

Why are autumn leaves red and gold?

[le Duc]

You mean why did it? It just didn't want them anymore.

Why did spring leave green?

[Fridays Child]

Because summer was icumen in just too darned often. Just good friends, indeed!

Why would anyone want a creme de menthe frappe, anyway?

[le Duc]

I would definitely specify the way in which I got it.

Why do clouds?

Hmm... or maybe, why don't clouds?

[BlackHawk]

Blueberry pie is certainly better.

Any reason I shouldn't call?

[Synamon]

All the reasons in the world why you shouldn't, and only one why you should.


What is the one reason?

[le Duc]

A good hand. In fact, I'd raise.

What were the other reasons?

[Wapiti]

Slowness is a leading factor.

Why do I dream of Genie?

[le Duc]

You left your lamp on.

Is being dreamy in my genes?