View Full Version : Do INTJ women like to initiate sex? Do INTJ men like women to initiate?
castalia
03-24-2010, 03:03 PM
I really like to initiate sex with a man in the early stages of a potential relationship. I don't like to initiate all the time but I would say I prefer it more than half of the time. I think it might have to do with being in control and ready when I want to.
Do INTJ men prefer women who initiate sex in the early stage or is it a turn off? Also, do INTJ men here have a favorite position during sex?
Just curious about all of this.....
cmrain
03-24-2010, 03:15 PM
In my experience, the person with the stronger sex drive tends to initiate more often. My best relationships tend to happen when I can go from nothing to very passionate sex with a partner with a simple look or touch. I like knowing that there is a lot of sexual tension and that either of us can take full advantage of it at any moment with a partner who is receptive. Primarily that happens when both parties have a strong libido and it is tough to tell who actually initiated.
My preference is similarly colored. I'd far rather have a female who is comfortable initiating and will do so frequently. I know I'll keep up my end of the bargain and it is nice to have a partner who is uninhibited to the point of initiating any time the idea strikes her. I value creativity, spontaneity, passion, affection and chemistry with women and those are best expressed with a partner who is as uninhibited as possible.
I really like to initiate sex with a man in the early stages of a potential relationship. I don't like to initiate all the time but I would say I prefer it more than half of the time. I think it might have to do with being in control and ready when I want to.
Do INTJ men prefer women who initiate sex in the early stage or is it a turn off? Also, do INTJ men here have a favorite position during sex?
Just curious about all of this.....
I'm an ENTJ and I love it when women initiate things (not just sex) because it makes my life easier. If I'm not ready to have sex with you yet, I'll tell ya. No harm done. Same goes for asking for dates, etc... I suspect I'm hardly the exception among NTJ males. That being said, yes we NTJs are in violation of tradition in this regard.
Definitely not a turn off, I doubt you've ever had any refusers ;)
Ridden on a dining chair is my fav :wideeyed:
Jeremy
03-24-2010, 04:08 PM
I have a high libido; provided I'm attracted to said female, I initiate it.
As far as positions, I enjoy being on top and in control.
Vagrant
03-24-2010, 04:28 PM
Position: Doggy. Mmmm, doggy.
Kisai
03-24-2010, 04:32 PM
I usually lead the seduction dance. Sometimes I'm pleasantly surprised when there's no need to do the seduction dance. I prefer the latter because it means we're both grown ups. But still, its sometimes fun to seduce someone... Its like practicing an art, not a need for control. I'm interested in sharing intimacy, not taking it.
Sex itself has many different flavors. Often I like to be in control and aggressively doggy-styling. Sometimes I like to share passion and be face to face, slowly kissing and fucking. I like the intimacy and giving of cunnilingus and I like dominating someone who enjoys being dominated. I can also give up and let someone else do all of the work, but there aren't many women like that... Usually I'm domming.
fonmaneal
03-24-2010, 04:56 PM
You can always tell if a man is ready for sex, he has a pulse.
And as the saying goes,"if you can't cut the mustard, you can at least like the jar!".:laugh:
ZincLysine
03-24-2010, 05:17 PM
I really like to initiate sex with a man in the early stages of a potential relationship. I don't like to initiate all the time but I would say I prefer it more than half of the time. I think it might have to do with being in control and ready when I want to.
Do INTJ men prefer women who initiate sex in the early stage or is it a turn off? Also, do INTJ men here have a favorite position during sex?
Just curious about all of this.....
When a woman initiates, I won't complain. If anything, makes life easier for me. That's a good thing.
castalia
03-25-2010, 03:38 PM
I'm an ENTJ and I love it when women initiate things (not just sex) because it makes my life easier. If I'm not ready to have sex with you yet, I'll tell ya. No harm done. Same goes for asking for dates, etc... I suspect I'm hardly the exception among NTJ males. That being said, yes we NTJs are in violation of tradition in this regard.
I need to find a guy like yourself because on a couple of occassions, the men got scared that I was eager to initiate sex after three or so dates. Granted, one of the two guys is highly likely a closeted gay guy, but the other one was also afraid. I am only basing this on two guys......a few others have been delighted.
Same thing goes for taking control in bed. Do you INTJ guys like the woman to take control?
Jeremy
03-25-2010, 04:08 PM
Same thing goes for taking control in bed. Do you INTJ guys like the woman to take control?
If she knows what she is doing, sure. Ride 'em , cowgirl. (But I still like to finish on top).
Do you INTJ guys like the woman to take control?
Uhuhhhhhhhh but you gotta mix it up a bit otherwise he'll be used to your lead all the time...gotta feed his confidence with him in charge sometimes and you having a free ride so to speak.
Kisai
03-26-2010, 12:14 PM
I need to find a guy like yourself because on a couple of occassions, the men got scared that I was eager to initiate sex after three or so dates.
What?! I think you are either dating men who are either sexually uncomfortable or you're going after Mormons or Catholics. Most men are usually very willing to have sex by the third date.
Eh... i've turned down sex after a week of seeing a girl every day, but that's because i thought it would have meant more to her (INFJ) than it would have meant to me. I didn't want to lead her on. If i'm dating a girl, and she wants to get busy after a short time, i'll usually join in if (a) i'm interested and (b) she agrees that it is what it is. Otherwise i'll let her know i'm willing, but not yet ready.
I definitely love when a girl is mature/forward enough to make a move, whether it's for romance, intimacy, or whatever else. If she is, i even feel more comfortable making a move, because i know she'll probably be straight with me if she's not interested. If she's forward enough to not worry about pissing me off then i can afford to be forward without fear of pissing her off in return.
Thinktress
03-27-2010, 02:22 PM
In my experience, the person with the stronger sex drive tends to initiate more often.
I agree with this. Although since traditionally the guy is supposed to do it I tend to wait in the relationship until I know he's ok with me doing it before I start intitiating - although - if he'd do it more often, I wouldn't need to... I hate it though when a partner gets upset that you don't initiate and then whenever you initiate in apparent compliance with that request, the partner has a reason for not wanting to have sex, i.e. too tired, too stressed, whatever. I feel kind of set up when that happens.
---------- Post added 03-27-2010 at 04:31 PM ----------
Eh... i've turned down sex after a week of seeing a girl every day, but that's because i thought it would have meant more to her (INFJ) than it would have meant to me. I didn't want to lead her on. If i'm dating a girl, and she wants to get busy after a short time, i'll usually join in if (a) i'm interested and (b) she agrees that it is what it is. Otherwise i'll let her know i'm willing, but not yet ready.
I definitely love when a girl is mature/forward enough to make a move, whether it's for romance, intimacy, or whatever else. If she is, i even feel more comfortable making a move, because i know she'll probably be straight with me if she's not interested. If she's forward enough to not worry about pissing me off then i can afford to be forward without fear of pissing her off in return.
Ready for what exactly? I mean, are you on dates all of these days or what? Have you just met this girl or did you meet her before and then you've had a week of dates. You don't know if you're interested by the end of that time? How do you know she would think it meant more? I'm just confused, your responses are usually pretty reasonable. FYI, I think I've probably made people wait a lot longer than that, so I don't even know where I'm coming from on this... Probably just projecting right now cuz I'm not gettin' any due to the rather precipitous end of my recent relationship. Finding a love interest in rural Alabama is one of the suckiest endeavors ever!
---------- Post added 03-27-2010 at 04:50 PM ----------
You can always tell if a man is ready for sex, he has a pulse.
That is SO not always true. Unfortunately.
vad1981
03-29-2010, 11:03 AM
most men like women to initiate....
OneHertz
03-29-2010, 01:06 PM
I need to find a guy like yourself because on a couple of occassions, the men got scared that I was eager to initiate sex after three or so dates.
I would most definitely not want to have sex after 3 dates and it would raise big flags if my date tried to initiate at that time. Does she do this with everyone? I am no longer interested in females that have had an absurd amount of partners for their age. 8 failed relationships by age 20 for example. It could be bad luck, but I would be more inclined to blame the common denominator.
I also kind of have a phobia of condom rigging crazy bitches trying to get me to pay child support for 18 years and after 3 dates there is no way I can safely say that you are not one of them. I do not delude myself with the thought that I can "just read people". In my experience, the real crazies are actually harder to notice.
If I knew the woman for some time prior to the dates then no problem, but if I have talked to her for under 15 hours total then there is no way I am jumping into bed with her regardless of how attractive she is. I would be comfortable after 30-40 hours spent together in some manner, even if some of that is just talking online.
Ellimist
03-29-2010, 01:16 PM
I don't know if the same preferences run in all INTJ's, but I for one love a confident woman. Not that I want her to initiate all sexual interaction, but I personally find in very intoxicating when she isn't scared to start things up. There is nothing sexier than a driven woman who knows what she wants and isn't scared to go after it.
Catira
05-01-2010, 04:50 PM
Personally I have rarely initiated sex, but I love physical contact and will constantly initiate kissing et cetera. Once we get going though, INTJ women are animals in the bedroom.
drawThreeCards
05-01-2010, 06:17 PM
I like it when we both initiate at the same time; I look at her, she looks at me, and we both smile like the Grinch from Dr. Seuss.
Barring that, if I want sex I'll initiate. If she wants sex, I would hope that she would, too.
If it's too skewed in either direction that basically means a couple is not sexually compatible. Deal-breaker for me.
catzmeow
05-02-2010, 10:57 AM
most men like women to initiate....
This is definitely not true. Some men are quite threatened by sexually assertive women. They want to determine when, how, and how often. Trust me, I've lived this dream.
Thank god this doesn't seem to be true for most INTJ men, who don't appear to be put off by women who are strong, once the relationship has some standing and both partners are comfortable having sex.
LifesEcstasy
05-03-2010, 03:14 AM
I love to initiate sex, it turns me on. And frankly I don't really care if he likes that or not, but so far no real complaints. I think guys are pretty easy, yes in that commonly denounced slutty meaning. If you can get his gear up, he'll rarely say no.
I really like to initiate sex with a man in the early stages of a potential relationship. I don't like to initiate all the time but I would say I prefer it more than half of the time. I think it might have to do with being in control and ready when I want to.
Do INTJ men prefer women who initiate sex in the early stage or is it a turn off? Also, do INTJ men here have a favorite position during sex?
Just curious about all of this.....
Yeah I prefer women who just cut the bullshit out and just get on with it. Plus I prefer dominate women anyway. For me it actually turns me on.
My favorite position during sex is doggy style, with the lights on. I refuse to have sex with light off. Also I prefer variety I prefer doing more then one or two positions. I use the doggy style because you can really work her form there.
For the turn off is when a woman does not want to experiment or is lazy in bed, I hate that.
hubcap
05-03-2010, 08:22 AM
Its great if the woman says something like "I want you now, lets go get it on" but I don't want her to be so aggressive that she starts ripping my clothes off. I don't want to be dominated.
Ilara
05-03-2010, 01:29 PM
most men like women to initiate....
Who's "most men"? I can't assert that you're wrong, but I don't have a broad history and I've been called a whore for straddling a guy--who was my boyfriend at the time (not the current one).
That being said, I find that smart and confident men do, as you have said, like women to initiate--as often as they do.
Also, I do indeed like to initiate sex, although most of the time it's hard to tell for me who's initiating--which is, as somebody mentioned above, the ideal in my mind.
Operator
05-03-2010, 01:31 PM
I love to initiate sex but it turns me on more when my gf initiates it.
fadelio
05-03-2010, 07:40 PM
I prefer to be on the bottom and her to initiate... Then after a couple or few orgasms (hers) I want to switch it up and have her ankles on my shoulders - and round it out with a bit of doggy and finish with her on top again.
I don't just like her to initiate - I need her to (sometimes - like 40% of the time or so). I need the validation of knowing she wants me to unlock my desire to please her. It's a fire that grows and grows.
Sweet jesus - thank you for being a girl who understands the third date rule and taking the pressure off by helping thinks get started.
vBulletin® v3.8.7, Copyright ©2000-2013, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.