View Full Version : How do you deal with anger frustration?
mind_wander
10-27-2007, 08:09 AM
This is a very obvious question, I been there before. How about you all? For me, its good to talk to someone who understands me and trust. The anger frustration, slowly disapates.
Max T
10-27-2007, 09:42 AM
If the source of frustration is a person, I've learnt to coolly, explicitly state to them why I'm frustrated. * Does feel weird saying "you are annoying me because... please stop".
I think that INTJ's occasionally risk being deliberately antagonised, so that others who seek an emotion out of us (the Fs in the world?), get it- even a negative emotion will do for them.
If the frustration is inanimate, I just think it over and seek prevention.
thegnat
10-27-2007, 09:49 AM
I don't. I run around trying to punch holes in the wall. It hurts my hands. Unfortunately I can't punch holes in walls.
all joking aside...
I probably vent to someone or myself(write it down or something). Or just think rationally and then stop being angry. It takes a *lot* to get me angry after all.
HarleyQuinn
10-27-2007, 10:13 AM
Depends. Usually I'll chat with a friend or if I'm angry enough that I fear blowing up at said friend, I'll just take a good 10-15 minute walk and cool off by the end.
cielo market
10-27-2007, 10:31 AM
I don't like to burden other people with my problems. Unless of course, they are involved themselves. Otherwise I may just spend days meditating on it, coming up with plans on how to get over it.
ShaiGar
10-27-2007, 10:56 AM
Likewise, I too internalise my anger and frustration. However in order to forestall an explosion I often release steam by granting my tongue freedoms with its caustic wit. I appear to be very abrasive, but because of this I am also extremely playful and forgiving.
As a young lad it was altogether too easy to maintain logs of transgressions and hold all of my pain and frustration back until someone burst it out and received the full brunt of everything kept hidden. Attacks such as these did little to diminish the feelings and until I worked my way into my current methods society was very hard.
hehe, thegnat, i tried that once in all curiousness and i too found that i was no daniel-san. ouchie.
bucolic_
10-27-2007, 11:46 AM
Exercise is one of the best remedies. I've heard INTJs are supposedly prone to heavy drinking to cope, but I've made a point of never using substances to deal with anger/frustration.
If I'm not in a position to exercise, I try to think it through logically, breath deeply, and put my mind in another place. I also will talk to a few people, mainly my mom or sister, but sometimes my ESFP friend (although she's very borderline ENFP), ISFP, or my INFP friend. It's kinda weird, I really like all the other guys I live with, but he's the only one I actually talk about my problems to.
mind_wander
10-27-2007, 02:23 PM
I just remembered on forums, normally there is a very strict rule, no flaming and spamming. However, I am very happy the admin created a spam sections, for everyone how got anger, frustrations, mental issues, more problems, and just let it all out in there. Yeah, damage other members in there. The point is to let it all out in the open, but at the end of the day it feels really good. Everyone knows its for fun and people do not take it literally. For example, on To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. the slap spam is my favorite because I partner up with a spammer, who is rated as an ESTJ [Supervisor] personality. Which is awesome, loads of fun when I am gone, he takes over. Then, I come back take care some business, then he take over again.
So everyone has fun, this kind of forum is really whacky because all of the rare personalities and common personalities all combined as one. Mainly alot of ENTJ's, INTJ's, INTP, ISTP, INFJ, ESTJ[supervisor], ISTP, ENFJ, ISFJ, and ISTJ. Alot of I's in there, put them all into one, what a whacky bunch. But, very cool people, alot of Graphic artists in anime, and other sorts. So if you like those things, hey glad for you to drop by. My purpose of this kind of thread is for a stress-free environment :)
AntimonyLegault
10-27-2007, 02:29 PM
They are compacted, converted, and processed into a form of usable energy that is directed towards hopefully level-headed judgement in the form of art, which is then left to sit until it is seen whether it was worth it, or not.
mind_wander
10-27-2007, 02:31 PM
Exactly, people are very creative in the spamming, gezz. But, more intellectuals, loves that. How creative can you be? At the same time, be you.
Firelie
10-27-2007, 09:00 PM
I had this one roommate that made me angry every time I walked in the door. That was a bad period of life, and I didn't handle my anger very well. I mostly just took my simmering energy out my blog and spent a lot of time on WoW killing things.
mind_wander
10-27-2007, 10:30 PM
I had this one roommate that made me angry every time I walked in the door. *That was a bad period of life, and I didn't handle my anger very well. *I mostly just took my simmering energy out my blog and spent a lot of time on WoW killing things.
At least you were using it constructively, especially on WOW; you earn points on it and make real money :)
OneBadMother
10-28-2007, 05:08 PM
I rarely get angry, but I used to react in a much more irrational manner whenever I was. Now I simply vent it within myself, by thinking of a hypothetical conversation and getting it out there.
Well,
I believe rightly or wrongly any problem is solvable by infinite thinking... so failure etc means nothing as it’s a short term aberration.
I actually don't get angry, I just close things down. I ditched the TV as it seemed to just annoy me watching all the cr*p and thinking about this and that over which I had no control (maybe it’s the control thing)
Anything too problematic I just close out. I'm not a doormat. That’s what’s great about introverted thinking... the world is as big as you mind thinks... anything is possible. All is possible.
Actually when I was young I also used to think in analogies and I remember thinking whether its better to be a tree out by itself growing to the light and suffering the elements or a tree with its light crowded out but in the safety of the forest.... one thing I did conclude though... some trees need to be pruned and growing outside the control of the forest needed to be kept in check. *;D I like analogies they are so three dimensional and can explain much more than words could ever. (I think its part of the bundling of thoughts into patterns.... analogies and visualisation do that quite well).
*
Epicurus
10-28-2007, 06:58 PM
Usually I just tune in on another mood and try to think of what I should be doing instead and do it, or what is more important than self-torment; exercise for example... However if I get really frustrated I can sometimes smash and slam; doors, walls, and various items.
TruorTupnm
10-29-2007, 12:19 AM
I don't get angry. Or, at the least, it'd have to be a lot. I am annoyed by plenty, but that's no large deal. If something like anger occurs, I grab it and attempt to postpone it until I am away from the source. Once away, I have probably already calmed down. Elsewise, there might be a bit of looking at walls and things and thinking about striking them but, since I am not such a large fan of pain, I never actually strike anything. A bit of "Argh!" type exclamations, mayhaps. I don't remember ever getting angry at an inanimate object. With humans, it'd be because my patience (after a while) finally snapped. I'd employ my large and commanding voice on them to make them aware of the problem and, if that wasn't enough, would push past them, not intending to inflict pain, merely to get them out of the way, probably with a look of, "Dude, why you gots to mess with me?"
mind_wander
10-29-2007, 09:57 AM
Has anyone in your family or friends ever so called "The broken record", likes to repeats the past alot; I have.
orange
10-29-2007, 11:48 AM
I get annoyed a lot, but but angry/mad almost never happens. I don't let myself get angry (leave the area then go be by myself, complain to myself, kill people on online gamges, etc... and if I must, talk to some I trust) if I can help it cause when I do I lose control and people get hurt. The person I'm directly angry at probally has a small amout of physical hurt (once they realize Its best that they back off I do the same), but everyone that see me step up and fight back is mentally scared from that point on. I find it kinda funny.
mind_wander
10-29-2007, 01:17 PM
I get annoyed a lot, but but angry/mad almost never happens. *I don't let myself get angry (leave the area then go be by myself, complain to myself, kill people on online gamges, etc... and if I must, talk to some I trust) *if I can help it cause when I do I lose control and people get hurt. The person I'm directly angry at probally has a small *amout of physical hurt (once they realize Its best that they back off I do the same), but everyone that see me step up and fight back is mentally scared from that point on. I find it kinda funny.
Seeming that most people trying to find the trusting person is hard. But people had learn toward the trust side with general issues or problems. Fine, send one in my pm then.
NephilimAzrael
07-28-2008, 05:04 PM
Point to the wall, then their face, then my fist and grin..:sneaky:
If a person agitates me, I simply refuse them the dignity of aggravating me. Exceptions do exist of course.
As for a directly personal anger, i often become dissonant to it and assess the situation. If all else fails, who cares?
Seppuku Savant
07-28-2008, 06:59 PM
I exercise. Something super strenuous like running vigorously for an hour. During that time I think about the situation and why I feel that way. Decide what to do about it, and then briefly explain to a close friend.
It's rare that I get truly angry.
Eric86
07-29-2008, 12:24 AM
I'm actually not sure....I don't really get angry or frustrated at all. I sometimes get disappointed if people aren't doing what they're supposed to or [especially] treating others improperly, but that's it.
searcher
07-29-2008, 03:06 AM
When I get angry, I don't do half measures.
If I'm hacked off at someone, they know about it.
Generally I prowl. I get really twitchy and can't stop moving. Trying to calm me down is generally a bad idea because I will only go sarcastic (and potentially violent) on you.
Beery Swine
07-29-2008, 03:33 AM
Well, noone understands me, so that's right out. Not bragging or anything, that's just the way it is. Usually I just cuss and clench my fists and flex as many muscles as I can to burn off the pent-up rage, sometimes I take out my anger on some innocuous inanimate object.
jikin
07-29-2008, 06:47 AM
It is very rare for me to get to the point that I'm actually angry or highly frustrated with someone. When it does happen, I don't really "deal" with it. I just shut down completely when that person comes around and avoid as much contact as possible until I can cool down and go back to being my normal "nothing bothers me" state of mind.
Grizzly
07-29-2008, 10:28 PM
If I feel a wave of anger coming up from my spine I try to let it pass by.
Not that I chant "I must not fear, fear is the mindkiller" but more like disconnecting a pc from a network with an escalating virus infection.
Disconnect the outward facing personality to keep everything looking normal and let the wave wash through internally.
After the immediate emotional response has passed I can then look at the situation rationally.
Caucus
08-01-2008, 02:23 AM
I rarely get angry. Usually, there is a logical solution to any problem that arise. Often people become angry over misunderstandings and misunderstood intentions. I don't let my anger out, but keep it inside until I think the problem through and it subsides.
Nuzke
08-01-2008, 10:09 AM
I have 3 rules that I set for myself since young.
If I am annonyed/angry and so on. Firstly I will ignore and laugh it off. Secondly I will walk away this is when I solitude myself from others. Last of all, it will be physical however it only happens if someone touched or spit at me first other than that I will still walk away. Even when someone hit me first, I will still find it hard to retaliate. It's weird but my mind keep telling me not to " how would you feel if you are the one who are suffering the broken bones and bruises " Damn it. If I do really hit, I will usually target the arms. ( Eventhough my bulleyes' would be the throat *grins* )
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