Do INTJs know the meaning of moderation?

[l345l]

perhaps it is our tendency to be perfectionists, but we do not seem to practice moderation. Any thoughts?

[Antares]

I actually do practice moderation quite a lot :)

[vaguely dissatisfied]

perhaps it is our tendency to be perfectionists, but we do not seem to practice moderation. Any thoughts?
I practice moderation now, but I believe my tendancy, when I was young, was toward excess.

[Santana28]

in day to day living - extremely. in my thoughts, plans, ideas, or efforts i'm very black and white about things - i either hit it full force with full effort, or i fail. there is no in between.

the down side to that is i have a tendency to avoid doing what i want (or finding other ways to accomplish what i want) when i am doubtful of the outcome.

[l345l]

in day to day living - extremely. in my thoughts, plans, ideas, or efforts i'm very black and white about things - i either hit it full force with full effort, or i fail. there is no in between.



I believe a lot of INTJs have the all-or-nothing mentality.
we generally aren't satisfied until we are far ahead and excessive, and if we can't achieve that, we don't do nothin at all.

[Victor Tango]

I practice moderation quite a bit.

Now, whether my definition of "moderation" fits in with everyone else's definition is another thing entirely!

Vic

[qwerty]

Haha it's strange... Recently I have begun a 'moderation' exercise and it's really opened my eyes.
I've found things about myself that I didn't realise were such a problem, until one-by-one they've surfaced and I've had to look in the mirror and see them one by one. I think it's a really interesting exercise for anyone who wants to find out about themselves.

[l345l]

Haha it's strange... Recently I have begun a 'moderation' exercise and it's really opened my eyes.
I've found things about myself that I didn't realise were such a problem, until one-by-one they've surfaced and I've had to look in the mirror and see them one by one. I think it's a really interesting exercise for anyone who wants to find out about themselves.


could you describe what you do in this exercise?

[qwerty]

could you describe what you do in this exercise?

Well I'd prefer not to go into that much detail... But it just involved stopping myself from doing something that I really enjoy doing and then seeing what my mind does to compensate.

[Santana28]

Well I'd prefer not to go into that much detail... But it just involved stopping myself from doing something that I really enjoy doing and then seeing what my mind does to compensate.

i did that years ago. its a good way to self-condition yourself... although i've noticed that when i choose to allow myself to excess, i go way wayy overboard now because i am allowing myself to. ugh.

[Lagawrd]

So the the best exercise for this is to fight against your desire to do something? What I like to do is force myself to do something when I ultimately do not want to. For example if I have to study for something and I am sitting around doing nothing, I stop what I am doing and I study. This also works for something you don't have to do, but you do it for the sake of beating yourself. This trains your will however, I dont know about the 'moderation'. I am not too sure about that word and its meaning compared to my day's work.

[l345l]

mmm... interesting. i might try that since i've been overindulging in things lately.

[Cytastic]

It's been my experience that moderation is only discovered/practiced when the proverbial "running at top speed" results in a collision with the proverbial "brick wall" - i.e., INTJs discover the meaning of moderation only when overindulging proves too dangerous. I think that might be true for everyone, though, and not just us.

However, I think there is a distinct difference in knowing the meaning of moderation, and the actual practice of it. Me, I can't do moderation. I'm either all in or not at all. I've never been able to eat just one Lays potato chip. I can't play only one game of solitaire. An open sleeve of Fig Newtons is an empty sleeve of Fig Newtons. I can't moderate drinking, either (if I start to drink, I will continue to do so until I'm huddled in the corner, pushing berries up my nose). I have to identify those things in which over-indulgence causes too much strife, and not engage in them at all.

So while I know what moderation is, I've never been successful at it. Sort of like dating.

[vkut79]

Yeah, INTJs are the sort of people that really focus on single things. They prefer not to multi-task. That has sort of been my life for the past few months. For some time I am basically committed to one thing, and then I switch to a different thing when I have to for some reason stop doing the one thing or I overindulge in it. Always singularly focused.

[Jerry]

often times, I view my views as moderate in the ultimate sense

I seem to hear two clowns give their take, and I make a geniune compromise

perhaps we are perfectionists, but we might be perfecting moderation itself

[mabts]

I'm not sure if it is so much that INTJs are excessive, but that we strive so badly to be perfect.

Meaning, we are often single-minded and put all our energy into something because we want to be perfect at whatever it is whereas excess in the sense of someone like Hunter S. Thompson, who would order 10 different things for breakfast and then eat a little bit of each, seems completely foreign to the INTJ mind.

[blue tie]

I know you probably didn't mean it, but I can't help but get agitated... Moderation sounds like mediocre, or average, or just bleh... And that's crazy weak. And it's infuriating sometimes. I like to imagine life and ideas like the swipe of a sword. Imagine a really nice, clean, cut, where you follow through all the way and really visualize the slice and see the fruit of your labor (the world has changed).

Now, imagine that, but then having your blade run into a brick wall. The wall gets dented, your motion gets interrupted, your blade gets dulled... It's just really upsetting. The next best thing to do would be to just keep the vision in your head and not do anything. Replaying it mentally is somewhat just as entertaining. At least you don't have a dull blade or any upset feelings. :)

But uhh... Moderation in terms of "abuse", yeah, that's absolutely fine. Because abuse of something (like drug addiction) just signals to me loss of control, which is never good.

[ElstonGunn]

I like to say "All things in moderation, including moderation." It's sort of a "pick your battles" kind of thing. If I tried to do everything in my life with 100 percent of my effort and get every single thing done perfectly, it would kill me, and if I tried to make everyone around do everything perfectly, they would kill me. There are some things that you can leave in a less-than-perfect state and it won't be a big deal. On the other hand, there are some things that you shouldn't even bother with if you're just going to do a half-assed job.

I think this is why my bed is always un-made.

[integratedvelocity]

Generally, I either put myself completely into something or not at all. For example, I had all my work for last week done by Tuesday. This week, I was up working until 4:00 in the morning a few nights. When I read a book, I either read the whole thing or don't read it at all. In my younger years, I would do nothing except play a single computer game until I finished it (sometimes multiple times). I spent six years of my life planning on becoming a professional violinist. I got into a really good college for my academics and haven't had a lesson since. I'm concentrating in economics. I would like to be able to live more moderately, but I am not sure I have the willpower at this point.

As far as perfectionism, I'm not as bad as I used to be. Granted, as a college student, I still had trouble accepting my first B, a B- actually. But the cause was procrastinating to avoid uncomfortable situations of not knowing what I was doing, so maybe I just deal with it differently now.

[deepFlow]

Heh... Sometimes I think I overindulge in emotionalism, which in itself sometimes leads to internets ranting, amongst other things. And in physical behavior departments, my instinctive hedonism seems to be overcompsenating for a relatively sedate youth. (Bursting at seams or something. Because I'm "justified", aren't I?)

Maybe I should start practicing some moderation of my own, and see what happens... :cheesy:

[JoshuaRamirez]

Moderation is relative, right? ;)
(In regards to the OP)

I practice moderation in many things in my life, but there things where moderation isn't a concern because it fits into those one or two slots of mine where I throw my all into whatever I'm doing.

For example, I hate getting drunk, but I like drinking. In my job, I like performing software design but understand too much is pointless without implementation at some point.

Moderation isn't the thing that INTJs lack when it is perceived by others to be so - instead it's the choice of what we put into those "slots"... ya?

[Tequila]

When it is something of interest, its always full steam ahead. But with regards to trying out new things for the curiousity sake or to have a balanced life, then yes... in moderation.