Tell a story about avatars....

[themuzicman]

Rule #1: You must have an avatar to post.

Rule #2: You must tell a story that incorporates some content from the previous poster's avatar. If I were to use Nikita's, for instance, I might post:

She replayed the event over and over. There was no choice. She did everything by the book, and still had to shoot him. But that didn't make her feel any better...

Length is up to you. Feel free to extrapolate.

[Seriously]

They were pigs with a mission. Flying pigs to be exact. Genetically engineered and highly intelligent. Their mission? World domination by eatable animals. They were tired of being taken for granted as just a tasty treat to titillate the masses.

[Synchronicity]

She looked down on her victim with a wry smile. "I told you this would be the last thing you would see on this Earth", she said with satisfaction. "Now die!"

[themuzicman]

"That's right, sir," he said with a confident nervousness. "This sport coat will make any man look 10 years younger and be irresistible to the ladies. I sell them for just $1500."

[Necrosis]

So the flying pigs decided to join the fun and used the sports coats as wings to enhance their genetically altered striking physique.

[themuzicman]

What we have here, gentlemen, is the skull of an INTJ. What makes it unique is the flat portion on the front of the forehead. We surmise that this results from countless unexpected facepalms and the banging the head takes against walls and desktops from their interaction with the real world. Even this X-ray is slightly off center due to a comment by the X-ray technician about the Cowboys winning the superbowl this year.

[nowt]

Orville's pig farming days were, literally, days. The pigs were not amused, tho Wilbur, however, was-- until the ensuing depression forced Wilbur to clean up his brother's mess.

[Night Runner]

The odd black-and-white design continued to occupy his thoughts. What exactly was it? he thought. Is that an oddly shaped tree leaf, a tipped pitcher of water, a caricature of a man with an improbably large nose, or something entirely different? He never did manage to figure it out...

[Necrosis]

So instead he ran, ran as far away as he could. But his white outfit was tight and did not allow for him to have much mobility so he appeared stiff and awkward like. Still, he managed to move swiftly as his tie flew into the wind. He did not know, however, where his journey would take him.

[themuzicman]

And so we see the Xray view of the cro-magnum man. You can see the skull is thicker, leaving far less room for brain matter. This is why we consider him to be pre-human, and probably incapable of anything more than emotional and instinctive thought. A bit like the modern blond.

[CatalystAK]

"Breaking news", the reporter said as tv on all channels was interrupted simultaneously, "a new breed of pigs has been found deep in the amazon jungle." The screen flashed with a satellite image if swarming pink pigs flying out of the forest, from some hidden temple it seems. "These pigs have but one request, submit or die!"

[Nikita]

He started an evil empire dedicated to the destruction of everything pink and fluffy, but found that he had to wield his power from behind a threatening facade because when he tried to give people the "evil eye," they just thought he was trying to come onto them and never took him seriously.

[nowt]

She shot a man, just to watch him die, and when he did not die, she shot him again. He still didn't die, and so she shot another man. That second man died straight away. She shot him again, anyway. Thend.

[Bluesea]

The unusual birdlike monograph of the Romanian family was rumoured to have its roots in the dark realm of Daracula ... the family, believing people were not very bright, thought that removing one wing and adding a beak would throw people astray ... but not so ... a curious INTJ traced it and discovered their bloodcurdling secret ...

[gianagianan]

a weirdo came up from no where and she has no idea what she is up to.

[themuzicman]

The brigade of police dog-men came out of Camden yards looking for the man who shot the queen's dog.

[gianagianan]

then the police dog-men will find the culprit when the pigs fly!

[Necrosis]

After looking for the queen dog killer, the dog men loaded up onto the high flying military aircraft. They were preparing for their HALO(High Altitude Low Opening) jump and needed their air masks to provide the oxygen. It was a suicide attack mission on their rivals, as none of the dogs had any parachutes...

[Silverity]

Davy just didn't know about his friend Necrosis. Even after plunging off the house roof and falling straight on his head the X-Ray showed him to be uninjured. Davy reflected on the fall and wondered...could his friend be a superhero in disguise?

[CatalystAK]

Silverity turned out to be Two-Faces sister, thus requiring her to hide half her face or give away her true identity. Batman has often sought her out to learn more about her brother but she has hidden well. This was helped by the fact that, contrary to popular belief, the other half of her face is normal looking and not scarred. Why she hides half her face still remains a mystery...

[hubcap]

While pleading that he was innocent the look on his face gave away the fact that he was in fact guilty of animal mutilation, creating crop circles, failing to yield to oncoming traffic, and cheating on his income taxes.

[CatalystAK]

The dinosaurs just kept coming. Being the pacifist he was, hubcap tried to reason with them. Then he got eaten.

[hubcap]

The name is Bond .........James Bond.

[JTG1984]

The young women all had revenge in their eyes. Hubcap had no other choice but to fight them one by one. The girls showed no mercy as they ripped out his hair and clawed at his skin with their long pointed nails. Before he knew it he was backed into a corner bleeding, tired, he was broken and he had enough.

[hubcap]

It was a tough life that he led. However, being blind from birth heightened his other senses. Unfortunately his blindness caused him to continuously bump into things and girls found him very uncool to hang around because he constantly groped them and wanted to touch their face. He was eventually killed in a tragic accident while urinating on an electric fence.

[CatalystAK]

Those eyes just looked right into your very soul. The longer you stare the more you can see the demonic hell inside. After all, you stare into the abyss long enough and the abyss stares into you.

[Synchronicity]

He gave a slight smile, knowing well no one would be able to notice the horrible acid burns on the left side of his face.

[Nikita]

He donned the blazer she selected for the party with their friends. He posed for her pictures. He laughed at their jokes...for her. Little did she know that she would soon be the punchline in his little joke called homicide. They found her body carved into pieces and stuffed into the mattress. His chemical invention masked the smell of decay and his prostitutes commented on how exceptionally spongy the mattress was. He looked like such a nice man....

[Bluesea]

She smelt the fresh gun powder as the last curls of smoke left the barrel ... there was not one body left alive, the scent of warm sticky blood mixed with beer and stale tobacco lingered in the air as she tipped her hat to the doorman on the way out ... " just 'cause I'm sexy don't mean I can't stick up for myself" she drawled in her southern accent as she sauntered out into the noonday sun.

[hubcap]

Her attempt at displaying the Vulcan sign for "Live long and prosper" was in fact the Vulcan sign for "I want to do the entire football team"..........which pleased the Vulcans immensely but caused her to violate her vows of celibacy to her holy order.

[themuzicman]

After all these years, it had finally happened. Someone managed to stare down Chuck Norris.

[hubcap]

Unbeknownst to most historians the Japanese originally intended to attack Pearl Harbor with flying pigs. However, Operation Oinker proved to be a failure due to the fact that the Japanese engineers could never teach the pigs proper navigation.

[Stratego]

Dr. Grant gazed off into the distance, thinking. Now this whole revive-the-dinosaurs idea was obviously f**ked, that much was clear. The Raptors were bad business, that would take some real strategy and throught; Rex was easy to take down since he was basically blind. But the biggest question on his mind was when, and how frequently, he could get into Dr. Stattler's knickers.

[Night Runner]

Her beauty was enchanting, mesmerizing, breathtaking. Her garments revealed everything and nothing at the same time. He forgot that he was lost, that he was severely dehydrated and that there weren't any other people nearby. His mind preoccupied with her beauty, he started walking toward her... His body was found at the base of the cliff several days later. "Another amateur camper," wrote the papers.

[hubcap]

He ran and ran and ran through the night trying to get away. He ran and ran and ran but to no avail..............he was caught by the mafia and given a pair of cement sneakers so he could run with the fish.

[gestalt]

The beaten, worn-down blue pickup truck had seen it's share of cement gravy and smoove moves. Now it was time for a new captain. But this time it had to be a man who could break heads open like the Grateful Dead and fart thunderbolts from his arse. A tommy-gun-wielding sunnuvabitch with a grudge against hoagies no less.

[Stratego]

It is said that Lady Cloud has a consort, a serpent of many colors. His flesh is as bright as cold and as dull as dark water, his tongue long and prone to sinuous lies. Once Lady Cloud fell in love with the Serpent she retreated to her domain in the mountains and locked herself away, soothing her jealous heart and hungry ears with his stories, his tales of travel far and wide.
In time the Serpent fell in love with Lady Cloud, and when she grew ill, he left the mountains and journeyed long to find a cure for her malady.
In the end, the Sage of the Spring told him that only a scale from his back would make her well, and that he could not go back to her or she would die. He was both the source and cure of her deathly illness.
So he left her, and now he spends his days twisting through the sky on his way to another place, another adventure. But every year he goes back to the mountains and rests on her window pane, soothing her with his lies and truths alike, only to vanish in the morning mists.

[hubcap]

She looked at him with bedroom eyes using that seductive, come sweep me off my feet look. Yet secretly she only had interest in his money and his power. Her plan was to snare him in her tangled web of lies and deceit. Once trapped, she would drain him of his money and power just as the spider drains the fly.

[Bluesea]

Stoned, smiling, and craving for munchies he just wished the photo shoot would end ...

[Cygnus]

Discipline, ritual, and sacrifice are required to see through the third eye.

[WoodsWoman]

Even the god of darkness brings his own kind of light - a light to chill and sear the corners of your soul.

[hubcap]

Her quiet and unassuming exterior hid the fact that she was actually the mastermind responsible for global warming, the 9/11 attacks, head of the Columbian cocaine cartels, shooter from the grassy knoll who really shot JFK, and the voice on the phone who said "Press 1 for English"

[themuzicman]

As Chevrolet's new spokesman, winning the Bassmaster's tournament for the second year in a row was a real boon to the car maker's sales.

[hubcap]

Flying Pigs From Outerspace was the flashback he continued to have as a result of his LSD trips in the 60's.

[WoodsWoman]

The quiet smile was a suitable disguise - none of the other operatives would recognize him now.

[hubcap]

Noone recognized the fact that Lizzy Borden was living among them.

[Cygnus]

Tabula rasa..but not quite. A tarnished, clean slate...that bears a warning!

[Zombicide]

Then, as the skies darkened, with that eerie smell of intimidation it became apparent that it was all over. The digital overlord manifested itself in the skies of Tamriel announcing its presence proclaiming "I am Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end, the first and the last. Thou hast been judged an unworthy lot, you will now be cast into everlasting perdition, are ye prepared for my kind of hatred? You are about to experience it". There was utterly no hope of surviving the coming battle, a battle against the most high, the indomitable digital overlord itself...and then battle music started playing and it was hella bad ass to the core.

[Bluesea]

The chinese wire puzzle was extracted from the victim as blood oozed all over the floor ... the deadly Kato was again prowling the streets ... almost witnesses can only report a jingling jangling sound presumed to be him ... detectives are still trying to solve the puzzle believing if they could only put it back together again they'd be able to get it apart ...

[hubcap]

Bluesea had a terrible accident that horribly disfigured the right side of her face and her left breast, but she still had dreams of being America's Next Top Model.

[WoodsWoman]

Infiltrating enemy headquarters he was again impressed with the craftsmanship in the cloak of invisibility that aided his progress.

[Nikita]

Looking back, she saw the life she had left behind, but choices had to be made. Nothing worth anything ever came easily. Was she evil? Perhaps, if it is evil to live for the future in a way that causes you to transcend who you were, who they knew. Some now say she is the Madonna reborn, bathed in the effortless glow of the kind of purity and light that comes not from comfort and stagnation, but from progress and change in the face of overwhelming odds.

[mrStevens]

The markings on her arm glowed eerily as she pressed the cold steel of her gun to her forehead. Would they still protect her if the harm came from her own hands? She hoped not. The pain that they have caused in her life was too great to bear. As she placed the barrel of her gun in her mouth the pain in her arm became excruciating. Then, she pulled the trigger...

[Bluesea]

He was alone in a strange city, no money, friends gone, only the thoughts in his head to preoccupy him ... I wonder what she's doing now ....the museum would open soon, there at least he would find solace for a while.

[Stratego]

(This pertains to Bluesea's avi)

In the aftermath of the Great War, the rebels gathered in a secret place to name their new General.
Hamaliel, they chorused, and she was summoned.
Why have you called me? She asked, Why have you disturbed my sleep?
The Frail Ones came forward, their gossomer veils following behind them, a river of green and violet silk.
You are strongest among us... said the first, trembling at the sight of her. Your wisdom is fierce when the realm is dark; only you can see, oh Holy Mistress Logic.
Hamaliel gave no answer at first, and the silence thickened. In her palm glittered Insight, the All-Seeing Eye.
And then: I will not lead your armies...
A whispering, a murmuring of dissent, disbelief, despair.
Then bold Raziel stepped forward.
I will serve with you, if you'll have me, Mistress. And he bent to his knees...

[mrStevens]

The wind whipped the new snow through her fur as she crept towards her prey. It had been over a week since she was able to fill her stomach, eating only a bird or two since then. Her body was getting weaker by the day and if she failed now she may not have the strength to hunt again. If only her pack had not shunned her she would be safe within their numbers. But given the choice she would do it again. The sacrifice that they expected from her was too great.

[miya]

She was about to attack the boy but his stare was too intense! The boy analyzes her and suddenly pulls out a package. It was full of meat!! Graciously, she accepted and wolfed down the meat. Little did she know...the meat was soaked with sleeping gas! The boy jumps up and cries "HAH! I've got you now!!!"

[newday]

The girl stares at the boy seriously and the boy was acting suspicious,
no wonder they staring at each other for at least a whole day.

[mrStevens]

"Vaaat have you come here for daaahling?" she drawled as she puffed on her cigarette. The man squirmed in the chair he was bound to, his mouth stuffed with a rag. A smile crept upon her face. She knew full well what he came for but she would be damned if he would get his grubby little hands on it.

"No matter. You vill suffer greatly. And I vill...enjoy it." a final puff then she smashes the lit cigarette on his forehead. The man utters a muffled scream and passes out from exhaustion.

"ATo view links or images in this forum your post count must be 15 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. Vat a shame. I vas just getting started. Boys, bring in the dobermans."

[True Rune]

Shinji was lost in thought...
"He does it so well.. how can I hope to match him?" he thought.
He had pondered this ever since laying eyes on the man.
"I know I can surpass him, but first I must steal his glasses.."
And then with fiendish laughter, Shinji continued plotting how to turn the "Gendo pose" into the Shinji pose.

[Stratego]

Child to man: Who is the greatest warrior that ever lived?

Man to child: His name was Hashiru Kazuya (Wind Runner) and he carried the Katana no Shinjitsu (Blade of Truth). Legend has said that he fought 20 men at once, moving as fast as the wind for which he is named, disappearing into the brush like a ghost, a memory. He could eviscerate a man with one stroke. (The man pauses) That is one bad-ass otoko.

Child: Hai.

[mrStevens]

The wolf took one last look at him before turning away to rejoin his pack. Kuckunniwi knew that it was just a vision but he was having a hard time getting over how real it all seemed. Alone again he sat in the forest to meditate on what was to come. Everything pointed to war and that made him uneasy. He closed his eyes and let the energy of the trees wash over him like a gentle ocean wave taking his worries with it.

[WoodsWoman]

It took him a moment to figure out what was different - it was the first time he'd been alone in weeks. The air was clearer, the light brighter than it had been in a very long time. Wow, this was NICE!!

[Bluesea]

She pressed her body close to the wall inside the wardrobe, she could hear footsteps approaching, could she work it out by listening acutely to the clip clop sounds ... he would be here soon, her mystery man, soon they would be fumbling in the closet together ....

[Stratego]

Hamaliel made no reply to this impassioned plea, and those gathered round her whispered and rustled under her inscrutable silence. Why would she not answer?
Raziel, handsome in his plated armour, spoke again:
"Lady Logic, there is no light greater than yours, no magic greater than your aprehension. So I ask again; will you not lead our armies?" He turned his blue gaze to her, the piercing color nearly a match to the jewel embedded in her palm..
The Great Lady lowered her arm, the light of Insight now hidden from their view. She made no sound or movement save for the slight downward turn of her mouth, pursed in thought.
"Mine to command alone?" She finally asked.
The Frail Ones gasped with excitement, some even moving to speak, but Raziel subdued them with a glance.
"And I, your Major," he answered, boldly claiming rank.
But the dark one, Ramiel, was not pleased...

[themuzicman]

It was perfect. Each member had their role in this evil plan. The death star was ready to go live. It's first test: earth, and the billions of imperfect idiots that lived there...

"Stupid, it's the wrong color"

The intrusion of reality was mind numbing. The thought of starting over was overwhelming. The self-destruct button beckoned...

[hubcap]

Was it a quirk of fate? Or a cruel joke by Mother Nature? Was it due to the fact that the pigs were raised near a nuclear waste disposal site? Regardless of the cause, these pigs grew wings and flew. They were mutants. They decided to call themselves X-Pigs.

[themuzicman]

"Hold my beer and watch this!"

[mrStevens]

Wanted for his participation in a terrorist plot to destroy the local Sheriff's office. Individual is 6'3" 210lbs and goes by the name of "Hub."

CONTACT: If you have any information concerning this individual, please contact your nearest authorities. Do not approach the individual yourself. Considered armed and dangerous.

[azelismia]

in a fit of rage he declared that he would never move from the steps on which he sat. well maybe it wasn't rage. Maybe it was actually something closer to apathy and laziness. he never could decide which it was. but, the end result would be the same. He'd never get up from that spot again. Unless, of course he got hungry or tired and decided to pop out for awhile to get some food or a nap.. but he wouldn't be gone long. not long at all.

Whilst in the midst of this mental tirade, he had been slowly surrounded with security guards holding tasers. The medical cabinets holding various drugs had been raided on campus earlier and he had been spotted leaving that area.. now he was drooling. they were all rather concerned for their personal safety in trying to take out an obviously mental patient. They weren't really trained for this sort of thing were they, now. no.. they hadn't even had to pass a drug test and had been given an assurance of never having to do anything more difficult than watch tv in midnight hours. Maybe it would be easier if we just shot the suspect and claimed that he had threatened us with something. the security guards engaged in a quick conference and decided this was the safest route, but should they shoot to kill so there could be no argument or shoot to wound. in the end it was decided that it didn't really matter as they had never actually fired a gun before.

in the meantime, the lad was still in his head on the steps roundly thinking of whether he felt enraged or lazy never even noticed as he lost consciousness. He was quite right though, he never did leave those steps.

[themuzicman]

Always the joker, Angie realized her epic wardrobe failure when Bob proposed to her after dinner.

[Stratego]

Re: themuzicman's avi

"Grandma! Grandma! Sing me the pig song again!" Storm asked.
"Again?" Grandma echoed, shaking her head, "You never get tired of that, do you?"
Storm shook her head no, and snuggled deeper under her umbrella decorated quilt.
"Okay, from the beginning:" Grandma e said with a smile, and sang:
If under your blankets you lie, unable to sleep.
Count the pigs that fly, instead of sheep.
Cute little piggies, with wings of white,
floating through the skies at night.
They'll carry you to dreamland
and when the night is through,
you'll wake to eggs and bacon, and biscuits, too!
Just don't ask where it came from.

[WoodsWoman]

Some believe that beauty will save the world, so the only way she let herself be known was through her artwork. No-one ever knew anything more about her, much as they tried.

[Bluesea]

She waited quietly in the wings, the spotlight on the stage sweeping over her highlighting her chiselled beauty. She was waiting for her cue, not long now, listening to her cohost make his one-liners to warm up the audience, for once she felt confident. Tonight it would be a breeze, she said to herself, she was looking forward to the show.

[hubcap]

When her dream to actually reach the summit of Mt Everest became a reality she unfortunately lost her fingers to frostbite as she couldn't afford gloves that actually covered her fingers. Today she is affectionately referred to by her friends as "stubby".

[Nikita]

(I count 5 fingers in her avatar...anyway....)

When time for the old high school reunion rolled around, he decided to take up the planning to avoid being stuck indoors with a bunch of over-dressed prom wannabes. He arranged for a tailgate out at the lake with a few kegs of beer and grills fired up to sear the creme de la creme of ground chuck and beef wieners. You can practically hear him laughing, now, ice cold bud in one hand, cigar in the other, laughing like the good old times...at least until the over-eager griller shot a huge wad of lighter fluid into the grill and the flames hugged the right half of his body.

(Can anyone do mine without talking about the gun?)

[mrStevens]

o.O But your avatar 'is' a gun.

[WoodsWoman]

@Nikita

She leaned her head against the steel longing to feel heat instead of cold. However, as an acolyte of Minerva she was called to the cold and would not give in.

[K27]

This woman was thinking about what to eat tonight. But she didn't notice that her shadow is coming out... as an individual life... and it's a male!

(Sorry but I really think the shadow looks like a man.)

[TheBlackKnight]

The angel stood in the Garden of Eden, waiting for the Lord to tell her it's time. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. She would miss the smell of the orchard while down on Earth, but, she supposed, it had to be done.

[WoodsWoman]

The chess piece was a fitting symbol for him -- he made no claims to the light, but did all he could to further justice in his own secret ways.

[Nikita]

She shied away from the spotlight, but it always managed to find her. She couldn't understand their need to be in her presence, to shadow her day and night. It was her night that she turned from, and yet her night that she embraced. If they could know her secrets, perhaps they would be less inclined to pursue her down those deserted alleys. But if they could see her pain, her struggle, her surrender, who would remain to tell her tale? And yet it can never be told because the mask is too impermeable.

[Bluesea]

The silent moment of meditative concentration filled her mind, she found her inner self, a state of focussed stillness, in the height of concentration, emerged a vision, from a place where a plan was emerging ... a lace tinged glove spoke to the delicacy of her approach, there would be no mistakes, it would come easily in one clear moment of action ...

[WoodsWoman]

She hesitated as she watched her minions - they seemed unaware of the force fields that she could wield with a thought. Hoping it wouldn't confuse them to the point of terror she lifted her had to offer the gift of sight...

[Doppelbock]

But then she heard a sudden noise -- footsteps behind her -- and slowly turned to look over her shoulder...

[themuzicman]

Time passed, but he did not. He knew it had to be dumped, but was stumped as to what more he could do. Then he noticed a man with a pad and pencil outside his window scribbling furiously and wondered what he was up to...

[perefalc]

The three little pigs decided that instead of relying on their feeble homebuilding skills to escape the Big Bad Wolf, some genetic mutations just might do the trick.

[WoodsWoman]

The music provided focus. This particular working would be one of her best - and the flowers would last forever.

[mrStevens]

We are gathered here today to honor the passing of a good woman....from the woods....with glasses.

[dweller]

Sitting on a stairs of school, looking at passing students. What else could he do in the times like now, thrown out of home, with no work. But in his eyes is hope, hope for better life. He knows that if he had to sleep at benches in school, if he had to wash in sinks and after gym classes, if he had to do night shifts at non named food chains, he will have home, once...

[TheBlackKnight]

My name is dweller. You killed my father. Prepare to die.

[plotthickens]

There, lying among the bed sheets, the dirty squealing rat found...!

[TheBlackKnight]

Out of peanut butter? I thought squirrels were supposed to store nuts for the winter, not for their nephews to eat. In spring.

[Stratego]

Chess was his life. He identified with the Knight piece, symbolized by the horse, a figure of charisma and romance, courage and athleticism; not because he sported vaguely equine features and had a penchant for sugar cubes, which was very true, if not consciously acknowledged by himself...

[plotthickens]

She raced as quickly as she could through the magic forest, knowing what horrid temptations lay in wait. "No," she had thought, "I will not stop in the stands of the HotDog trees! And I will be strong, I will sprint right past Cake Lake. Prince Charming doesn't like fatties." Unfortunately, she'd stopped in the FriedChicken Field the night before for a midnight run and therefore her whalebone corset was too tight.

She had passed out in the IceCreamSundae reeds. It was all over. Now Barbie wears pretty floral Muu-muus.

[Roxie]

He looked down his long nose at the giggling girls. His face was wrinkled in a look of disgust. Age had taken his sense of humor and the hair on his head and left behind big bushy eyebrows. The bow tie and sweater vest reminded all that in prior years he had been a proper gentlemen and a snazzy dresser.

The girls looked up and the laughter stopped in an instant and was replaced by fear of the old man. They scampered behind the woman leading them, probably a mother to one of them and looked down at the floor and walked quickly behind her.

After they walked just a few feet they burst out giggling as only young girls can do and one said out loud, "EW NOSE HAIR, HOW GROSS!!"

[hubcap]

Her appearance of youth and innocence concealed the fact that she had worked the streets as a hooker for several years. She worked the mean streets and was the meanest of them all.

[zibber]

Apparently ripped a Taz graphic from his Looney Tunes game on Sega Genesis.

[WoodsWoman]

As he watched he couldn't help wondering if his future would hold anything as painful. Probably. It was good to know it could be survived.

[themuzicman]

And when the door closed, there was nothing. It was black. He couldn't see his hand directly in front of his face. His eyes we now completely useless.

[plotthickens]

We all had a good cry together.

And hell froze over, too.

[themuzicman]

"Oral sex? That's when I say 'screw you' and she says 'bite me'"

[plotthickens]

*flight of the valkyries music* *dopplering VROOM sounds*

....


*oink!*

[hutbug]

He wasn't going to let those young whippersnappers cross his perfect lawn one more time, dagnabbit! By gum, they would pay. As he loaded his shotgun and took up his post at the front window, he spied the young ruffians starting to walk on his beautiful grass...

[Stratego]

Mister Tiggelsworth had very decided opinions about a great many things--a sunlit window ledge made for the most comfortable bed and the best locale for continued reconnaissance of his domain. From that vantage point a stray dustmote hadn't a chance, nor a particularly ambitous spider; they each fell to his swift, merciless claw.

The topography of the couch was well mapped by the sensitive pads of his paws--there wasn't a corner unknown, a secret unexplored, a event gone unnoticed. He was unstoppable, a force to be reckoned with, master of all he surveryed.

Except for those days. When the old lady dressed him in a frilly tutu and served him cakes and tea. Then, he wasn't so sure of his Rule...

[newday]

Almost done.. almost done to go down the stairs when suddenly stepped on her dress and stumble down. A beautiful face covered with dirt and blood.

[ReasoningMind]

Open here I flung the shutter, when, with many a flirt and flutter,
In there stuck a stately raven of the saintly days of yore.
Not the least obeisance made he; not a minute stopped or stayed he;
Stuck upon a branch of willo' just in front of my chamber windo'
Stuck, and froze, and nothing more.

[HappyToBeMe]

Looking at the strange thing in the window, the kid told his mother, "Can I please have it for Christmas?"

[Doppelbock]

But instead of answering, she just bared her teeth dramatically into the breeze.

[WoodsWoman]

He wonderd if and when the laxative would begin to work.

[reiven]

It was tense. For what seemed like an eternity she sat nearly motionless, recounting the idea in her head. Each time he thought her about to speak, he was denied. He had done everything according to the book, touched all the points, the close was perfection. He dared not move his arms and reveal the sweat stains growing under them.
"I do like the hepa filter" she said at last.
"If I give you the two year, unlimited warranty, can i leave this model with you?"
Another interminable pause. At length her sojourn ending, she smiled contently and said "I'll take it."

[hutbug]

He approached the man pointing the strange shiny black object at him hesitantly, wonderingly...then thought 'what the hell, worth a try', stuck out his hand and asked 'spare change?'.

[HappyToBeMe]

Everyone was ignoring this weird looking animal. Thinking of how to be adopted, the cat thought to itself, "Maybe if I throw myself into the lake, they will feel pity for me and take me home with them." It never did happen. Instead, the cat was put to sleep. :(

[reiven]

It was finally her day. The crowd was boisterous, chanting her name. Her outfit was perfect, her hair picked up by the gentle breeze. This was so long in coming, and she knew once they got to know her, they would accept her. As she stepped up to the mic, the bucket of pig blood was already on it's way down.

[reiven]

His ethnicity was not the issue, though everyone wondered. The question we heard most often was "what could have happened in his childhood to make him so bitter?"

His communications skills are lacking, personal hygiene continues as an issue, and failure to wear the vest resulted in his most recent disciplinary action.

It is our recommendation that he be removed from the "greeter" position, and returned to the lot to collect buggies.

William Nathans
Wal Mart Operations manager
Greensboro SC

[HappyToBeMe]

Bad boy, bad boy/ Whatcha gonna do, whatcha gonna do/ When they come for you!

[hutbug]

She just knew she had seen an angel on that last cloud drifting by...but why didn't it fly down to carry her away like she had dreamed since she was a little girl? Oh well no matter, she was sure it would come by again tomorrow, perhaps it just hadn't seen her, she would have to smile more brightly, that's all. Perhaps if she took her gun to the mall and just waved it around, the security guards would shoot her and then she would get a fast-trak express ride to her dreamed-of destination.

[HappyToBeMe]

After the kids threw the cat in the pond, they decided to continue with the joke and put a Santa hat on it. The cat was not happy about it and it showed. *giggles*

[reiven]

EDIT: @ HappyToBuyShoes: if i take time to write a novel, i should expect some body's gonna cut line

it seemed a pretty straight forward exercise, jump up on the white stool, hop over to the table, knock off the stick-thing and slap it around on the floor for a few minutes; no big deal.

things unraveled right away. she hopped up onto the stool and fell right through! Who puts freakin water in chair!?! Undeterred, despite the most disconcerting feeling of water dripping from her everywhere, she climbed to the rim of the chair, determined to make it to the table. the table was tiny by human standards. it was topped by the most curious picture; sometimes a picture of mary when she was in the room, sometimes it would be the kids when they were there. on the edge of the table she saw her prize; the stick thing with mary's hair hair woven into the surface. as she prepared to leap, she knew her balance was somehow different; this must be what mary calls water-weight gain.

She leaped with all her strength hitting the table at about her midsection. she had expected the surface of the table to be flat, but no. this tiny table was hollowed out on top and slippery as the kitchen floor on tuesday nights. with nothing to grasp, she fell back from whence she had come, again neck deep in the water.

this time she made no haste to clear the stupid water filled chair, but deliberately laid each paw over the edge. The hair-stick-thing no longer seemed worth the effort. if she found her way clear of the chair, she determined to crap dead center of that shiny kitchen floor.

[HappyToBeMe]

And so reiven decided it was time to go to a nursing home. He grabbed a plastic gun and said to himself that nothing and no one will stop him from getting help.

[WoodsWoman]

She looked across the fields to the small town. Only two buildings had been there when she'd arrived five years ago - the general store with the post office in one corner and the jail. Now there was also a school, a meetinghouse, a hotel and a saloon. Yes there were still difficulties, but everything was proceeding according to plan. The virus would be introduced in 2 years 4 months and 13 days. She smiled contentedly.

[hutbug]

She looked over at reiven and thought "is he out of his friggin' mind?".

[azelismia]

hutbug, realised with growing dismay that the shiny energy field which separated him from the Christmas fish was actually made of water.

[WoodsWoman]

He suddenly realized that he'd never get to be a real super hero as long as he was wearing diapers.

[reiven]

She didn't know the source of the light; it wasn't really relevant. it was warm, it was just, it was comforting. it began so many years ago that she associated it with the passing of time.

there was a sort of growth quality to the light, it was almost reactive to her. when she was at ease, the hue and brightness were at ease. when she became troubled, the light was stronger, warmer, more aware of her. this mattered, because it had been a difficult year; draining.

this day, as the light framed her face, it revealed the strength of her features and poise of her persistence.
this day the light drew strength from her.

[WoodsWoman]

The small bent creature walked the paths among people who studiously avoided him, but the children knew better and would cluster around begging for his blessings. They knew his power and the gift that he carried. They would cling to him as long as he allowed. That he would leave eventually was understood, but each prayed in their own way that that time might never come.

[Double Victory]

"Don't.... don't touch me," she breathed softly, turning away. She couldn't remember the last time a man made her feel this way. She was afraid. Afraid of what would happen if she gave in, if she let him into her heart, if her husband found out. But her blood was boiling. It wouldn't be long until he would close the distance between them, and they both knew she wouldn't be able to resist. She never could.

[WoodsWoman]

She loved that painting - the swirl being pierced by the light - now if only that light would also pierce her swirling thoughts. What was to be done? The body was on the upstairs balcony and sirens could be heard in the distance.

[themuzicman]

He hadn't expected her to look.. normal. She had the appearance of the average middle aged housewife. Who could ever have suspected that the primary al queda contact for the entire United States was this innocent looking woman? And Tom was looking at this woman through his scope. She had to be taken down.

[reiven]

sure, sure. he knew exactly what he was dealing with. the wolf was the prototypical obnoxious ESTJ, came by selling timeshares and became the 'guest' who would not leave, going so far as to fix himself a glass of tea from the fridge.

after over an hour of lobbing sarcasm at the wolf (which incidentally went right over wolfies head), things came to a head. in hindsight, muz prolly shoulda just said something like "my brothers and i are headed over to my condo, and it's best if you leave now." instead, muz played trump and explained the sequence by which the wolf would find himself departed from (muz's) little brothers home, unemployed, under investigation by the SEC, and dispossessed of his escalade (on lease by a poker buddy of muz's)

the ESTJ went all rambo and blowed up muz's brother's homestead early the next morning.

as the brothers became airborne, muz smiled to himself, "in 30 seconds, i'm gonna toast me some wolf"

[WoodsWoman]

The small bent creature walked the paths among people who studiously avoided him, but the children knew better and would cluster around begging for his blessings. They knew his power and the gift that he carried. They would cling to him as long as he allowed. That he would leave eventually was understood, but each prayed in their own way that that time might never come.

Every once in a while an adult would come along who had eyes to see and would join the edge of the youngsters throng, quietly listening. Even less often they would have the courage to offer words of encouragement themselves, instead of just taking. What was it the adults had lost that only listened, only took - and offered nothing in return. Those were the ones he felt for the most - sometimes they carried their pain as a shield. These were the ones he wanted most to help, but could find no way.

[Stratego]

There were worlds behind her eyes; entire civilizations built from thought mortered with her own algebra, equations solid and connective. Each circle is an eye... she told me, gesturing towards the bottle-bottom window over the sink in her kitchen, or a star, bending light.... Then she told me all about light, and refraction, and relativity.

Her home was an encyclopedia of lessons. No matter where my finger landed or what my eyes mapped she taught me to think in ways no one ever did. She was mentor and magician both.

[azelismia]

She ran away from the throngs of people hoping in the ball with a searing mortification. Lady Essington was wearing the same dress and talking to her love, count Monitifort. He had bought the dress for her in paris and apparently bought more than just one. Revenge would be enacted, but not here and not now..

[WoodsWoman]

She put on a smile behind the fake facade - but her eyes were sad. No one took the time to really look, to look beyond the antics and see the tears.

[Zombicide]

She was reading a book about scolopendra gigantea when one crawled up beside her desperately looking for a snack, and so bit into her leg.

[ArtistTyrant]

who would have thought that this bucktoothed little rascal would grow up to invent a method of color photography just so he could sell his childhood pictures as souvenirs

[MassHysteria]

Lost in his own head, he stared, unseeing out the window for over half an hour. It was not until stringy clouds dissipated over the sea that he shook himself and returned to work, never seeing the words "I love you" skywritten just for him.

[reiven]

the red man says photography steals the soul; but she wasn't worried about that, or about anything else for that matter. her bar/inn/joy-spot had made her quite the wealthy woman, and bringing in a big pittsburgh photographer was just one more first for her little town.
her prices were fair, her liquor plentiful and her women gorgeous. there was nothing incomplete in her life, until she saw the daguerreotype.
when she posed for the picture, she stood alone against the back wall of her saloon; but when she saw the image, there was clearly a hand on her shoulder. seeing the picture for the first time gave her the most incredible thrill of her life. she knew there was something different out there, and she was going to find it.

[WoodsWoman]

Every once in a while an adult would come along who had eyes to see and would join the edge of the youngsters throng, quietly listening. Even less often they would have the courage to offer words of encouragement themselves, instead of just taking. What was it the adults had lost that only listened, only took - and offered nothing in return. Those were the ones he felt for the most - sometimes they carried their pain as a shield. These were the ones he wanted most to help, but often could find no way.

Me? I was one of those adults, seeking to find courage in the presence of this odd being. His patience was infinite, and a quiet word in my direction kept me coming back. I began to know myself a child again, began to learn to let go of the pain that ruled my life. I have only started - but somehow he knew. He smiled at me the last time I was there.

[Liason]

She put the silencer onto her glock .45 and moved over to the side of the doorway. It was dark, and she had to hide in the shadow, lest her white shirt give her away. Her glasses gleamed with the reflected light as she slipped behind the door. She had been anticipating this moment for a long time. The sound of a door opening and shutting. The slight shuffle as a weary man slid his belongings onto the floor and trudged tiredly to his room after a long day at work. Walking into his room, he didn't bother to undress. Flopping down onto his bed, he didn't even see her. She raised the gun. It was finally here. And she smiled.

[AnnoyingPony]

Liason had traversed many worlds to search for the ultimate truth of the universe. But in all his years, he had never been to the world... where everything was blue. (Da ba dee da ba die)

[WoodsWoman]

AP held the owl mask in her hands wondering if it was necessary to dress to to face the night. The elders all preached caution - this is the way it's always been done: we do not walk by day, and night is only safe under particular conditions. She dreamed of walking by day - of light, of what flowers might look like in blossom, of distance.

[Liason]

Gripping the butt of her rifle, a woman; nicked Woodswoman for her rifle skill, turned back and finished loading her rifle. Sneaking into the Union army was hard, but she was here. Little did she know it was going to be one of the greatest battles of the civil war. She pointed her rifle at the confederate troops, aiming at another unfortunate treasonous scorn. And so another shot was fired at the bloodiest land battle in history. The Battle of Gettysburg.

[AnnoyingPony]

It was an unsolvable case, they said. It was too perplexing for any mortal mind, they said. They were all wrong. He thought he would be the one to find the answer to this twisted riddle, nay, he knew. Detective Liason was on the case.

[Thakur]

AnnoyingPony was abashed when they realized running around a superstore in their bath robe carrying zombie squirrel skulls wasn't as popular in common society.

[AnnoyingPony]

Thakur was a simple mechanic who spent his hours fiddling away with his car in the garage. Little did he know that he would be the inventor of the giant combat robot one day, and thus bring an end to the world.

[Cooper]

Once I put this mask on, life will never be the same for me. I will be everything I have ever dreamed of, I will be....

[reiven]

It started almost thirty years ago, right over there. A child was taken and killed on the way home from school, and found discarded in The Alley. The loss of life was a tragedy; but so was weight on Cooper's shoulders. He didn't know why, but he knew he had to do something.

Technically no one owned the property, The Alley was a popular shortcut, and clearly dangerous under the wrong conditions. His whole being filled with anxiety for the one harmed on his watch; he vowed this would never happen again. Lighting the alley would only reveal the wickedness, what was needed was a presence; an undeniable power that will suffer no harm to those who pass through.

And so it started. Anyone who calls this place home knows the man who protects The Alley...
It is rumored that he caught the slug that killed the schoolkid, and on quiet nights, they say you can hear a faint voice from somewhere in The Alley, begging to die.

[WoodsWoman]

Me? I was one of those adults, seeking to find courage in the presence of this odd being. His patience was infinite, and a quiet word in my direction kept me coming back. I began to know myself a child again, began to learn to let go of the pain that ruled my life. I have only started - but somehow he knew. He smiled at me the last time I was there.

But adults were secondary - he worked with the children each day, instilling lessons and reinforcing things done right, hoping to keep them from becoming like those adults, like me. The first time I saw him I could see the patterns in his efforts - now that I've been around for a bit, and learned of my own need to grow, maybe I can help in some small way... but there will never be another Reiven.

[AnnoyingPony]

WoodsWoman earned a humble living as a clock maker in a small town. But she was no ordinary clock maker; for she specialized not in machines made for reading the time, but machines for controlling time. Word of her legendary skills quickly made their way to the inner sanctum of the masterminds plotting to control the world.

[reiven]

She looked at it as a simple dichotomy, and fortunately a choice she was able to make. most of the time she was quiet and unassuming, known only to a few close friends. but when the situation was dire, when people were at risk, she was someone else all together.

years of inward focus and fanatical training in the dojo had tapped a power that surprised even her own boundless imagination. She had a near fanatical obsession with the order of her movements, with the precision of her Kata's.

she marveled at the inner balance and tranquility she possessed in her ninja mindset. there was no more emotional roller coaster- no paranoid obsession with the villainous schemes to have her undone. she was in complete control, and behind the mask there was but one voice in her head. it was Reason.

sometimes she thought her life would be best if she never took down the mask.

[Liason]

He flipped his hat over, twirling it from wigger status to g-mode and glared at the blaring sun. Walking though the parking lot, shirtless, everyone stared at his walloping strut. He didn't notice though. The creature was a beast, in the best possible interpretation of the word, and he knew it.

[reiven]

"what does it mean?" she asked the person behind the newspaper waiting on the bus.
she walked up to a fellow waiting to cross the street. "what does it mean?"

"what does what mean?" he asked

wrong answer.

Such was her gift/curse. There is meaning and it's relative; but how can it be relative if no one knows the context?

"What does it mean?" she asked again.

[Liason]

Posing for the shot, he head them yell again "No, that needs to be a tenth of a degree to the side". He didn't even dignify it with a response. He was well aware photographers were impossible, but what to do what to do. He knew what he wanted his pictures to come out like, but if only the camera man weren't such an abstract artist buffoon. He pretended to move his arm a bit. "perfect" the photographer said. His arm was in the same place he had it before. What an idiot artist. He didn't even know what he wanted. Oh well. . .

[BinaryMe]

Many hours passed as the investigators and graphic artists struggled to piece together a composite image of the offender. Time and time again they listened as terrified victims recounted their recollection of events. Each new account echoed the one before it: "It happened so fast. I can't explain.... the eyes... those piercing dark eyes... make them go away, ... make them go away. I can feel them looking straight through me. ... Please, PLEASE MAKE THEM GO AWAY!"

[Cooper]

Short and sweet, this is how you test a watermelon for juicyness.

[BinaryMe]

Your time has come my friend. You have been a worthy nemesis but the game must end. As soon as I release this lever, the trapdoor beneath you feet will open and forever release me from your haunting presence.

[Cooper]

BinaryMe worked late into the night, but success was finally had! Now to find that ticket to the Galleger show......

[BinaryMe]

Late one night while driving around in my Mini Cooper, I spotted a vaguely familiar figure skulking in a dark Alley... I stopped to take a closer look, but this phantom had vanished into the cold night shadows. Then my heart skipped a beat as I heard the faint sounds of sinister laughter in the distance...

... has my nemesis returned once again?

[Cooper]

I awoke from the depths of darkness with cool sweat running down my brow. I listened closely for the quiet hum that I heard before the darkness came. It was gone, in its place was a rythmic ticking. I touched my hand to my head where the pain was and pulled it away feeling warm and sticky. Blood. It came back to me in a slow rush, the Mini-Cooper rounding the corner, its headlight sweeping the brick wall in front of me. I turned and ran down the Alley, gracefully moving in the shadows. I cut the corner like a thoroughbred, my cape snapping like a whip, my shoes cracking on the cobblestone. Then, the blow out of nowhere, the darkness cascading over me. I felt myself fall backward in slow motion. The last thing my mind saw was the melon crushing machine....

[BinaryMe]

Once the initial shock had passed... As my fitful breathing settled and my heart resumed it's regular rhythm, a sudden flash of inspiration invaded my unsuspecting mind: 'How could I continue? Was this really the end? Was it over? ' But then another vivid thought entered my conciousness, even more menacing, yet strangely exciting.'

It was in that moment that I decided I would have to let him go... for now. The challenge and the chase were far to exhilarating for them to end this night.

I would live to see my nemesis another day but first I must find a new approach. The Mini Cooper was far to obvious and the Mellon Crushing Machine had failed to crack this nut, breaking in the process... (and it's out of warranty too) so I'll have to devise a whole new strategy... a new plan of attack, a new disguise!

[WoodsWoman]

She watched wide-eyed as he stepped through the doorway - the smell of fine Cuban cigars preceded him. It was him - the man sworn to avenge Draco, Draco who had torn her world apart, Draco who she had shot.

[AnnoyingPony]

"It's the best thing I've ever made," Timothy said, with emotions welling up in his voice. "I built her with my own hands, with my own tools. She is... my new mother."

[Cooper]

Once I put this mask on, I will be the PonyLeader. Then let them call me annoying....

[AnnoyingPony]

Jane held her purse closer to her chest, in hopes of warding off the thugs that tended to show up at this time of night. All was silent on the lonely cobble street. Suddenly, all the lamps went black and a dark fog enveloped the area in its shadowy embrace. Jane tried to call for help, but her words had stopped in her throat. Then she heard a voice from the alley, a voice that would change her life forever...

[WoodsWoman]

Joan smiled slightly. Soon... soon they would find out. Find out that the scape-grace they'd been treating poorly for the last year was not someone they should be treating with contempt. No, she wasn't the emperors daughter - they would NEVER learn that one's identity - indeed none of the populace knew of the royal tradition of sending the children out for a year of commoner life. She wondered what the fishmonger would think then next time he saw her because she would be the inspector and have the authority to make his life intolerable. Tomorrow would soon be here - she smiled again.

[AnnoyingPony]

A blast from the sea shook the ship from all sides, sending shipmen sailing through the air and alarms screaming shrilly. Mothers cowered and held their children close; men stood and stared with a look of blank shock and awe. Amidst the chaos, nobody saw a gaunt lady in a green turtleneck make a dash for the control room. She would have made her journey, if she hadn't been stopped by a 7-foot-tall man of tough mettle and an even tougher disposition.
"What the hell are you doing, miss?" the brute asked, his voice gritty and gruff. "Get back down to the deck and wait for the lifeboats!"
The woman simply smiled slyly and stared the man right in the eye... it was silent for a moment, but then she said, "My name isn't miss, it's Agatha Browne, and you're going to let me pass if you want these passengers to survive."

[Liason]

A little tipsy from the festivities, she walked home at an offbeat gait. The moon was missing from the sky, the stars covered with the clouds, and the streets barren of anyone else. A child appeared in front of her and screamed. She flipped out, pulling off her mask, trying to comfort the child, but when she took off her mask, the child was gone . . .

[AnnoyingPony]

Royal Prince Liason had a heart as cold and dry as the barren wasteland of a country he ruled over. Until he met his long-lost twin brother on a midsummer's night...

(I MUST REVIVE THIS THREAD!!)

[reiven]

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it wasn't necessary for her to distinguish good from evil, when right VS wrong was so clear to her. there were people who required justice, and if 'the system' (whatever the hell means) wasn't going to act, she would.

she had a photograph of the man she was looking for, and she had her tools under her kimono. on a whim she picked up the mask in a novelty store. soon, very soon, she would show the world what justice looks like. her heart was racing at the thought of actually doing this.

(since people change av's from time to time, including the pic makes sense for posterity)

[WoodsWoman]

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He continues to appear telling odd stories that don't seem to make sense at first, but after you think about them for a while you begin to see yourself in a new light. Most of those who listened were children. They didn't take as long as adults like me to comprehend the promise of change in each one of them. Sometimes he seems to doubt them himself, but only to show us that it's OK to not understand, to have to take time to work things out, even sometimes to not succeed at working through it all - as long as we keep coming back for more. I know I don't have it all figured out yet, so I'm one of those.