Impatience

[Uytuun]

How impatient are you? Do you know if it has anything to do with our type?

I consider impatience one of my weaknesses. Once something has nestled itself in my head, I need it to be executed ASAP.

[Zilal]

Well, it's weird. I can be extremely patient with other people, patient standing in line, etc., but I am often terribly impatient with myself. And with personal discomfort. So, if I'm afraid of something, I expect myself to get over it as quickly as possible, and get rid of the feeling as soon as I can.

It's terrible. It causes more problems in my life. I am working now on increasing my patience.

[istheather]

I get impatient is when it pertains to myself when dealing with personal issues and dealing with what I would call "difficult individuals". ie idiots..LOL

[Danisty]

This is definitely one of my weaknesses and one of the billion reasons I've decided not to have children.

[ssfanatic]

Im pretty sure it has a lot to do with our type. I only personally know one other INTJ and we are both very impatient. THough somehow around each other we can calm each other down. Its something i focus on daily, like when im in class and the kid in the corner keeps making primitive and crude jokes for the sould purpose of attention, it really gets me, bu i try to just keep calm

Its definitely one of my problems, and its something i work with and reap the consequences of daily.

[snoogit]

I'm pretty patient when it comes to things like standing in line, waiting to see a doctor, etc. But things like waiting for a package, taking time to polish an application I'm programming (Because it's perfect the first time dammit!!! Those things you call errors? Are actually extra features!), etc. those things I'm impatient with.

[Solaris]

Well, it's weird. I can be extremely patient with other people, patient standing in line, etc., but I am often terribly impatient with myself.
.

This is very much the same for me. I am both highly impatient, and highly patient. The deciding factor is the subject matter and the personalities of others involved. With myself...pretty much always impatient though.

[PortInStorm]

I'm mostly impatient. I used to get irritated with the spoon that made the drawer stick, the pen I couldn't grab on the first try, typing mistakes, my hair tangling or flying in my face, etc, etc. I'm starting to mellow out now, but everything that didn't work right would evoke my impatience ("I'm trying to get something done here, universe!").

And amen to Danisty's reason for not having kids.

[Santana28]

i am both exceedingly patient and extremely impatient in different circumstances. the thing that drives me up a wall more than anything is when someone REFUSES TO GET TO THE POINT. my husband and his mother both are very descriptive talkers and will go on and on and on telling me about everything from the temperature outside at the time to how uncle clarence is doing to what kind of detergent they prefer and take FOREVER to get to what it is they are trying to say. I can't even guess how many times i've cut my husband off and said "Thats nice.I really don't care about all that. Now what exactly are you trying to tell me?" It's mean - but he's wasting my time and driving me up a wall!!!

But other than that, i'll overlook just about anything... i'm not generally impatient, except in conversation.

[anthrogirl]

I am really impatient, and yes it drives me nuts when people won't get to the point (as I remind my INFP husband who speaks holistically). I am impatient with bad drivers, and people who are late, or keep me waiting at appointments (doctors, dentists etc). However I am trying to learn patience because being impatient keeps me wound up.

[Uytuun]

Yes, yes, that's true, very impatient and very patient for stuff like queueing.

[HarleyQuinn]

I'm normally pretty patient but get really impatient when it comes to issues that should be done quickly but aren't for whatever reason.

Most recent example: I go to the hearing aid place for a free checkup and arrive there 15 minutes early, partly b/c my mother kept nagging me about doing so. I end up waiting (including the 15 minutes early) 50 minutes! to go in.

The thing that really drove me up the wall was that the whole thing lasted like 2 minutes with a couple of the "tasks" being things I could've done at home. The only small upside was that it was free but stuff like that drives me bonkers. I was pretty calm for about the first 25 minutes and then my impatience started showing.

For things like waiting in line, etc. I'm usually patient because I don't have much else to do "around" the event so I'm not worried about it taking an extra 5-10 minutes.

[quentin]

To truly test your patience, try navigating traffic in Taiwan. Or China. Or Vietnam. Or the Philippines. Or any other rapidly developing Asian country.

Grrrr....you pussies in North America and Europe think you've got road rage.....

[INTJoe]

I'm extremely impatient with dumb people. I know it sounds rude, but I can't help it. I'd honestly rather never see an idiot again, and probably not lose any sleep over it.

I can exercise patience with smart people or average people, especially if I'm teaching them or explaining something. I think this has a lot to do with the fact that I find it challenging explaining things as clearly and concisely as possible, so it's a fun game for me.

But dumb or slow people...grrr.

[Antares]

How impatient are you? Do you know if it has anything to do with our type?

I consider impatience one of my weaknesses. Once something has nestled itself in my head, I need it to be executed ASAP.

It depends. If I really want a software to work, I can sit there all day and toy around with it, but if I really want to have something, I would be restless and irritable. My piano teacher said that I play the exposition of 'Clair De Lune' by Debussy too impatiently and I lack the 'serenity' the piece seems to convey.

I'm extremely impatient with dumb people. I know it sounds rude, but I can't help it. I'd honestly rather never see an idiot again, and probably not lose any sleep over it.


I don't have much patience with them either... I would often get quite condescending and start calling them 'darling' and 'sweetie pie' all the while explaining my point like: So you write 'and' after the word because you want to 'link the bridge' between two apple farms separated by water, right?

[dayguard]

Well, it's weird. I can be extremely patient with other people, patient standing in line, etc., but I am often terribly impatient with myself. And with personal discomfort. So, if I'm afraid of something, I expect myself to get over it as quickly as possible, and get rid of the feeling as soon as I can.


same here... impatient in a sense that i need to see that everything gets done when i am in charge of something. need to see that the big picture is in place

[karen]

I find that my patience varies with the situation. As a new teacher I have become acutely aware of this. When a student is struggling with a topic because it is poorly explained in the book, or because it is difficult, or even because they are just having a hard time with a detail, I have infinate patience.... the first time. If I have spent a whole lot of time expalining soemthing one day and they come up to me the next saying they don't understand it... oh ho ho... I'm not happy. Or when they come up to me and they say they don't get it.. what part?... all of it! My god. I had to spend 6 months as the interim special ed. teacher for a boys' school: it was hell. (I'm very proud of myself though, I pulled off the whole 'nuturing' thing really well).

Also... phone calls. I hate using the phone. Calling a company and being put on hold for god knows how long is like torture for me. I can handle long lines, traffic, long speeches, even being dragged to church once a year... but the phone calls..............

[coffeeloverfreak]

i am both exceedingly patient and extremely impatient in different circumstances. the thing that drives me up a wall more than anything is when someone REFUSES TO GET TO THE POINT. my husband and his mother both are very descriptive talkers and will go on and on and on telling me about everything from the temperature outside at the time to how uncle clarence is doing to what kind of detergent they prefer and take FOREVER to get to what it is they are trying to say. I can't even guess how many times i've cut my husband off and said "Thats nice.I really don't care about all that. Now what exactly are you trying to tell me?" It's mean - but he's wasting my time and driving me up a wall!!!

But other than that, i'll overlook just about anything... i'm not generally impatient, except in conversation.

I'm a very impatient person in general, but I just had to comment on that because it's one of my pet peeves as well, and it really rang true! My mom, for example, can talk for 5 minutes in a voice mail message, when she could have simply said "Hi. Call me.". Drives me nuts!

[Cytastic]

I can be very patient if I see it coming. I expect the need to be patient at the doctor's office, or standing in line at the supermarket, or if I'm visiting a friend and his children are awake. It's when I don't see the need coming that I don't handle it well. Driving (I do a lot of talking to other drivers - it's good they can't hear!), getting ambushed by the rambling conversationalist at work, and people who ask me "how did you arrive at that conclusion?" can send me right over the edge.

So it's probably a good thing that I internalize rage, haha.

[aok]

I'm very impatient. I always feel like I'm wasting my time when it involves waiting for someone else to follow through on things or tentative plans on their own time. I want the possibilities for the future to continuously result now.

[sds0311]

The only patience I seem to have is with children - They are my weakness

[ElstonGunn]

I show up for everything early. I don't mind waiting much at all. I'd rather be an hour early than ten minutes late for an appointment.

One thing that infuriates me to the point of homicidal rage is this common scenario:

Me: Well, thanks for having me over. I'm going to head home now.
Host: Okay, thanks for coming. Now let me offer you every possible leftover foodstuff, memento, tchotchke, and knick-knack in the entirety of civilization.
Me: Nah, that's alright. You keep it all.
Host: Oh, okay. Well how about I try to make more small talk with you before you go? How are things? Have you heard from that mutual acquaintance of ours? How is every person you've ever spoken to?
Me: Leave me the #@*& alone! I said I'm going. That means that I want to be pulling out of your driveway no more than 30 seconds after I finish telling you that.

[MNRon]

Pretty patiet when it comes to training dogs. Tend to be much less patient in most situations.

[Vojnik]

I find young children irritating, not all, just the one that seem to ask you irrelevant questions. wtf! Just leave me alone, I know whatever I say to them will be forgotten the minute they see a toy or a candy of some sort. I blame there parents for encouraging such behaviour. :p

[In Strict Confidence]

Another interesting thread for me to join, yay ^^

I have the same layout as a lot of people here, a combination. I cant be said to be patient or impatience, and that confuses some people who seem to want it all in black and white.
Maybe this combination of patience and impatience is a trait of INTJ's and/or similar personalities? If so, why, what in the INTJ-personality is behind this, or correlated with this?
And further, something I have wanted to think about is what things make me patient or impatient? As some people have said;

Patience - waiting in line, people in general, animals, children ...
Impatience - morons, waiting for packages ...

more? patters? anyone? ;D

[nickasummers]

I'm impatient if i have something i could be doing, but if i don't have something to do it doesn't matter whether i am in a line or at the end of it. i frequently wish i had a master key for the doors at my school so i wouldn't be forced to stand there waiting to get into the science lab and then stand there waiting to get back into the classroom.

[youngblooded]

I'm quite patient when it comes to waiting. Depends on what I'm waiting for but most of the time, I just won't mind anyway. I once waited 3 hours for a person. Just stood there in the freezing air condition. I get very impatient when dealing with dumb people or ineffiency that should have been corrected but have not.

[colmdubh]

Much of my impatience stems from feeling like I have to follow an un-written protocol whenever I'm around "normal" people. Being a teacher and an INTJ, I am very patient with students who are at least trying and even little kids who don't know better but very, very impatient with those who don't care, so much so if I could I would kick them out of my class. I have the same impatience for those who spout ideas they do not really understand or think that small talk is a requirement for being a human. Possibly those are more akin to pet peeves. I used to be impatient with myself but realize if I'm doing the best job I can then I'm doing all I can.

[integratedvelocity]

I am patient with young (pre-k through 4th grade) children, but not very patient with anyone older. I don't even like phone calls because they could type it in an email that I could read in much less time than our conversation would take.

[Aurelia]

i am both exceedingly patient and extremely impatient in different circumstances. the thing that drives me up a wall more than anything is when someone REFUSES TO GET TO THE POINT. my husband and his mother both are very descriptive talkers and will go on and on and on telling me about everything from the temperature outside at the time to how uncle clarence is doing to what kind of detergent they prefer and take FOREVER to get to what it is they are trying to say. I can't even guess how many times i've cut my husband off and said "Thats nice.I really don't care about all that. Now what exactly are you trying to tell me?" It's mean - but he's wasting my time and driving me up a wall!!!

But other than that, i'll overlook just about anything... i'm not generally impatient, except in conversation.

I laughed when reading your response because this is exactly what gets me so impatient when talking to certain family members too! It drives me nuts.

[aexis]

It amazes me how this forum consistently seems to mirror my own thoughts at any particular time.

I said this weekend: "I'm not searching for instant gratification, I'm just very impatient"..

This may be due to the INTJ 'getting things done' nature. The vast majority of things we can finish/solve/complete/succeed at with a reasonable amount of effort and perseverance. The impatience tends to come into play when we are presented with a situation out of our control, which most of the time appears to be human-human interactions (such as courting).

[Haphazard]

I'm very patient with things like machines and electronics and waiting for packages but I'm extremely impatient with people, bureaucracies, and niceties, but I'm especially impatient with myself.

I guess that's normal on this forum, though.

[searcheagle]

It amazes me how this forum consistently seems to mirror my own thoughts at any particular time.

I said this weekend: "I'm not searching for instant gratification, I'm just very impatient"..


There is truth in that quote for me, too. I am not a patient person. If am walking someplace, I am constantly think of ways that I can shorten the length of time that it takes to get there. Perhaps if take this route, I can save a few steps here or there. Or the area ahead is usually congested this time of day, so if take a few steps over here, I can skip the traffic. I will plan the stops on my trip before I leave so will travel in the most efficient path.

However, on the most talked about topic on this thread, I do have a degree of patience. When it comes to Lines, waiting for people, etc. I have a patience AS LONG AS I CAN SEE PROGRESS and they are working efficiently! If I am in the store waiting for a clerk to ring up 3 people in front of me, I can wait patiently if they are moving quickly. A slow clerk will drive me nuts. As will a line with more that 5 people+ in it with another clerk walking around.

A professor told me that a certain MBTI characteristics were more like to be Type A personalities. I believe it was the NJ combo. Look at this definition of Type A versus the INTJ Definition:


Type A is also characterized by a general discontentedness and the impulse to be overly critical and demanding, even contemptuous of imperfection, in the self and others. This focus on negative aspects and the accompanying bursts of hostility and impatience result in guilt, remorse and anxiety.

...
Type A folks experience a constant sense of opposition, wariness, and apprehension--they are always ready for battle. And anyone can imagine how this constant (and very exhausting) existence would deplete reserves of contentment and happiness and disrupt personal equilibrium.

...
Type A personality is characterized by an exaggerated sense of time urgency, competitiveness, anger and hostility. People who share certain characteristics with you are often concerned with the acquisition of objects and generally dissatisfied with the world, including oneself. You don't know how and when to relax. People probably get tense around you, and they tend to feel threatened in your presence.
To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.



INTJs are perfectionists, with a seemingly endless capacity for improving upon anything that takes their interest. What prevents them from becoming chronically bogged down in this pursuit of perfection is the pragmatism so characteristic of the type: INTJs apply (often ruthlessly) the criterion "Does it work?" to everything from their own research efforts to the prevailing social norms.

...

Anyone considered to be "slacking," including superiors, will lose their respect -- and will generally be made aware of this; INTJs have also been known to take it upon themselves to implement critical decisions without consulting their supervisors or co-workers.

INTJs can rise to management positions when they are willing to invest time in marketing their abilities as well as enhancing them, and (whether for the sake of ambition or the desire for privacy) many also find it useful to learn to simulate some degree of surface conformism in order to mask their inherent unconventionality.
To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 2 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.


Those definitions look similar to me!

[Nausved]

I am a fountain of patience. You have to work very hard to irritate me.

I suppose I am most impatient toward people who make too many demands of me, place unwanted responsibility on me, or talk down to me. But even then, I tend to just shrug it off and avoid them thereafter.

If something seems inefficient, I'll take steps to fix it. However, I don't do so out of impatience; I do so because it seems reasonable to. If I am unable to fix it, I don't particularly care. I just move on to something more pressing.

Honestly, it makes no sense to get impatient over anything that can't be helped. And if it can be helped, why are you stressing? Just fix it.

[Victor Tango]

I'm a very patient person. However, I don't suffer fools gladly.

Some people think this is a contradiction. It isn't.

"Being patient" is waiting for something you hope or expect will come to pass.

I entertain no hope or expectation that a fool will suddenly become "not a fool."

[deepFlow]

I am impatient with other people's impatience, and the demands they then place upon me because of their unwillingness to deal with it.

I long for some quiet thinking time, some mellow creative time, some time spent listening to voices that matter and silencing all of the others that infect and poison your soul.

But... some people just can't stand silence. They have to fill the air with squawkings, screechings, bleatings and LOUD SINGSONGY PROCLAIMINGS UNTO ECONOMIC SYSTEMS IN WHICH YOU ARE COMPELLED TO PARTICIPATE!

Quiet, inner, mellow, stark, existence. It's a bitch, ain't it!

[SeaCzar]

I am very impatient with everything, morons, as mentioned previously, in particular. I must say that I have more patience now than when I was younger. Patience is a learned behavior.

[meaniehaha]

If a line is too long, I've been known to get tired of waiting, and just leave despite having to come back later. Kind of dumb, but that's how I am.

I'm fairly impatient all the way around. I dislike waiting on anything if it takes more time than I think it should.

[catd]

Patience is a virtue, but not one of mine.

[sriv]

I can be patient when I want to be.

[Vertigo]

If whatever I'm being patient about is out of my hands, like if I'm waiting for mail or waiting to see a doctor then I am patient until the end.

No if it's in my power to make things happen then I usually do whatever it takes to get what I want, a classic example is if I see something that I want, whatever it is I work at it and get it where others would think I couldn't. I wonder is that a trait with all INTJ's that we get what we want?

[Airfire]

Patience is indeed a virtue. Thankfully, it is a quality that makes up my entire being and is my primary strength (of very few). I have an unearthly capacity to accept delay and have never been impatient my entire life. If I am to wait around for something to occur, I have a mind that never shuts up that I can listen to as well :P

[Kserafi]

Patience is a virtue.

I also tend to be impatient with small talk or irrelevant details. There is no need for them, so why must we waste our time with them? That's time that could be put to better use. As with most in here, I'm also patient with things like waiting in line. Patience, to be appreciated, has to be learned and practiced over time.

[Synamon]

I'm a very patient person. However, I don't suffer fools gladly.

Some people think this is a contradiction. It isn't.

"Being patient" is waiting for something you hope or expect will come to pass.

I entertain no hope or expectation that a fool will suddenly become "not a fool."
That describes me perfectly. I'm patient when there is something in it for me, otherwise forget it, and don't waste my time.

[foroneonly]

Like with most things I have to rationalize or justify the need for patience. For example as a child I never respected or listened to adults unless I thought they deserved it. With pateince if I expect it, like waiting for a doctor, I'm very pateint, but if someone is late ect. I can become very annoyed. I've gotten better with age. But I can certainly identify with people not getting to the point. That aggrivates me to no end.

[olsonlj1]

I become very impatient when I perceive that someone is being slower than they could be. For example, two people walking arm-in-arm slowly down a small, crowded hallway. I call them "moving roadblocks."

I also get impatient when I grasp a concept much more quickly than everyone else, and then I have to wait through the rest of the explanation when I already understand.

I agree with ElstonGunn; that scenario is very annoying.

[Vathir]

I can be patient if I choose.

However, when dealing with idiots, I much prefer to be impatient and show subtle clues, such as tapping my fingers on the counter.

[Synamon]

Are you patient in line ups or when you have to wait because you can just retreat into your own head? Maybe we aren't patient as much as willing to take advantage of opportunities for quiet contemplation when we find it. That would make us less resentful about waiting than other types. Patience with other people clearly doesn't fall into this category, most of the responses reflected impatience with people, particularly idiots.